A:N/ Did that feel like an eternity to anyone else, or am I the only one that missed updating this story? I'm so sorry about not updating in so long. When the site went down, i figured it wouldn't take long for the chapters I lost to come back, but well.... I had been going to try and be patient, despite how much I was looking forward to updating again, but I just couldn't take it anymore. So I've put up all the chapters that were missing, plus this new chapter. This way everybody gets something from my update, no matter where you were up to in the story! Best of all, now I can update daily again! This story has 26 chapters, so this means we're now officially half-way through! Thank you to everyone who hasn't unsubscribed despite my poor updating recently. Anyone who did, please come back? I''m back now, promise! Enjoy the chapter!

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It was a week later when Chunji found himself pacing along the corridor of L. Joe's school, in search of the younger boy. L. Joe had informed him that he had to do a performance for his Music class, and so he'd needed Chunji's help getting to school. He was supposed to perform using his violin, and he didn't want to risk getting his instrument damaged on his way to school, were he to walk. He'd asked Chunji to come get him from the Music department, that afternoon as well.

He'd been warned that he would probably be a bit late, and so he found that now that he was walking through the school, the place was relatively empty. He kind of preferred it that way. In a way it made him feel a little less guilty about his exploration of the school campus as he attempted to find the Music department. He had no idea where it was, since he had only dropped L. Joe off at the back gate that morning.

He was so distracted as he tried to work out how to get to the Music department that he didn't notice the teacher in one of the classrooms as he passed by. The older man must've been surprised by the sight of an individual boy walking past the windows, and so he had approached the doorway in order to accost the younger boy.

Chunji had thought that he was about to get told off by the older man, when he saw the teacher approaching the doorway. Or at the very least, that he'd get a very suspicious talking to, regarding his presence in a school after hours. The thought made his heart rate double, at the reminder of the age difference between himself and L. Joe.

Whenever that happened, he always had to take a moment to try and remind himself about what he was doing. Trying to reassure himself that he wasn't a creepy ert and that he wasn't doing anything wrong. He felt as though other people thought that he was a sleazy college student trying to prey on a naive, innocent little high school boy. He had to take a deep breath to remind himself that he had no untoward intentions towards the younger boy.

His heart still thudded unevenly, when the realisation hit that the older man was someone that he recognised. Chunji had never seen any of the teachers in L. Joe's school before. The edge of his fear dissolved, when he heard the older man's throaty, disbelieving whisper “Chanhee?”

His legs froze, trying to place why the older man's face was so familiar to him. He frowned lightly, before his eyebrows shot up in recognition, “Mr Park?” he questioned, surprised. It had been several years since he last saw his old History teacher from high school. He had been intending on returning back to his old school to inform them about how his studies were progressing, but he'd never gotten around to it. He never would have thought that he would run into him here; at L. Joe's school.

The old man's face lit up with pleasure, as he gestured inside the classroom, clearly liking the thought of having a long conversation with his ex-student. Chunji shook his hands, regretfully, “I'm sorry, but I'm here to get someone, so I can't stay long.”

“Which student, if you don't mind me asking?” The older man commented, intrigued.

“L.... Lee Byunghyun. He's in his final year.” Chunji answered, stumbling over the name. He'd just gotten so used to calling him L. Joe, that he'd almost forgotten the boy's real name. It felt strange to call him anything else.

“Byung...hyun.....” The older man murmured, eyes shifting from side to side frantically, as he tried to place a face to the name. “Maybe he's not a history student...” Chunji suggested, helpfully. The older man shook his head, frowning lightly, “No, I'm sure I know that boy. His name sounds familiar, I just can't put a face to his name.”

Chunji shrugged, unsure what he should say in response to his old teacher's comment, and also starting to feel a little worried that he was keeping L. Joe waiting. “Oh wait! Yes, I know who you're talking about now... You know Byunghyun?” he enquired, intrigued.

“Yes. My father is friends with his mother. Since his return from the US, we've started talking.” Chunji explained, gaze sliding down the hallway before him, wondering if he'd catch sight of L. Joe walking towards him at any moment. He felt bad about making the other boy wait.

“I see.” The old man stated simply, rubbing his chin thoughtfully as he observed the younger boy. When he saw Chunji shuffle about, unsettled, he sighed, smiling slightly. “So, what are you doing these days?” he asked, crossing his arms.

“I'm in university. I'm only a first year, but I'm going to major in History.” he commented, flushing slightly, when he saw the pleased grin that lit up his old teacher's face. “I knew you were one of my good students, but I didn't realise your love of History was so great.”

“My love of History has been growing every year that I've been studying it.” Chunji responded evenly. There was something about talking about History that made him feel lighter; happier.

“I can't help but wonder if your love of History could rub off on Byunghyun.” The older man commented mildly. Chunji's eyebrows, quirked in intrigue. “You mean, he isn't good at History?” “Well, he does alright, but I don't see a lot of passion in his eyes. It's like he's just waiting for this year to blow over. I get the impression he doesn't seem to enjoy much of anything that he studies.”

There was something about what his old teacher was saying that struck something within him. The moment he registered his words, it was like he could see the truth of them. He wondered if his teacher was aware of just how accurate his perception really might've been. “Well, I haven't really talked to him about History. Maybe...” he trailed off, considering the idea.

He tried to shake it off though. It would be silly to get his hopes up. He didn't mean that much to L. Joe; he didn't have any influence on the younger boy. He doubted anyone could influence L. Joe. That boy seemed to do whatever he wanted to do; no one would be able to win him over about something like this.

You either loved History or you didn't. L. Joe clearly didn't.

He didn't even know why L. Joe acted so cold towards everything. But there was always an air that he didn't want anyone getting too close; that he wasn't going to fall madly in love with anything. But Chunji had no idea what went through that boy's mind.

“I should probably...” Chunji said, doubtfully, gesturing over his shoulder, to try and show his teacher what he meant. He couldn't get the words out fully. He was very fond of his History teacher. He was a little reluctant to let him go, but at the same time, he knew he'd probably left L. Joe waiting for far too long.

The older man's hand shot out, clearly intending on grabbing the younger boy's wrist, but never getting close enough to do so. He probably wasn't really interested in touching him, anyway. “Before you go, I'd just like to say. I think it's really good that the two of you are talking. L. Joe seems like he could use a good friend. You too.” the old man stated, turning back towards the desk, before Chunji could muster a reply.

L. Joe's History teacher thought that they needed one another? It made him feel a little more upbeat to hear that. For some reason, it made him feel a little better about his relationship with L. Joe, knowing that he was doing him some good. Maybe it wasn't so bad for a university student to be friends with a high school student after all?

He hurried down the hall, trying to find the Music department. From a distance, he could make out the outline of a single person leaning up against the wall, less than a hundred metres away from him. He was standing in the shadow, so he couldn't make out his features, but there was the unmistakable outline of another solid object next to him.

It had to be L. Joe. No one else was around. A quick glance down at his watch told him that he was over 10 minutes late. He swore softly to himself, jogging over to the person, worried that L. Joe would get fed up and turn away, before Chunji could apologise. He really hadn't meant to keep L. Joe waiting.

Before the garble of apologies he had lined up on his tongue, could be spilt, L. Joe gave Chunji a deep look, like he usually did before he said something random but meaningful. His eyes were blank; he couldn't see any trace of anger or disappointment, and yet Chunji still felt guilty about making him wait.

“I feel like a sundae from Maccas. Let's go.” L. Joe murmured, firmly meeting Chunji's gaze with his own, as he moved to walk back down the hallway. Of course L. Joe would say something like that. No mention of the performance he had today. No questions regarding why Chunji was late coming to pick him up. Not even a simple hello.

Chunji quickly chased the younger boy back down the hallway, not really wanting to get left behind, even though it would be impossible for L. Joe to leave without him since they were using his car.

- -

Chunji tried to take a string of deep breaths as he made his way back to L. Joe, who was seated in the car he parked in the Maccas parking lot. He was carrying an ice cream sundae for each of them. Chocolate for L. Joe, and one of those promotional ones the company was advertising, made with some sort of fruit for himself.

Chunji hadn't really paid it that much attention, when he'd ordered it. He really just wanted something to eat, so that he would have something to distract himself from the awkward silence that would no doubt be echoing throughout his car upon his return.

L. Joe hadn't said anything to him on the drive over. L. Joe wasn't exactly what Chunji would call a talkative person, but it was rare for L. Joe to be that quiet. Despite the absence of any traces of anger in his gaze, Chunji could only assume that L. Joe was more affected by his tardiness, than the younger boy was letting on.

He slid into his seat, handing the sundae over to the younger boy, with one of those large plastic spoons, still feeling uncomfortable about the lack of conversation between them. It had been a while since L. Joe was this quiet with him. Had his lateness, acted as a massive step backwards in their relationship?

“We could eat these inside, you know. There aren't that many people here at this time of day.” Chunji commented, lightly. He knew it was silly to try and make idle conversation with L. Joe, given his suspicions that the younger boy was angry with him, but he felt like he had to at least try it. L. Joe was very stubborn. If he'd been adamant that he wasn't going in before Chunji went inside, he wasn't about to change his mind now.

“Don't want to. Someone might try and steal my violin.” L. Joe commented, evenly, distractedly on his spoon, gaze focused on the sundae currently held within his hand.

“I'm sorry I was late.” Chunji stated, relatively convinced that his words would have no impact on the younger boy. True to form, L. Joe said nothing in response. Disliking the quiet, Chunji pushed onwards; continuing with his explanation, hoping to explain his actions, such that L. Joe might stop being unhappy with him. “I was on my way over when I ran into an old teacher of mine, who wanted to talk. I came as soon as I could.”

“I didn't think you went to my school.” L. Joe commented lightly, apparently trying to sculpt some sort of shape in his ice cream.

“I didn't. Apparently, my teacher transferred schools after I left.” Chunji answered.

“Did you like them?” L. Joe enquired, gaze never wavering from his target. Chunji wondered if L. Joe was really as disinterested in what he was saying as he was making out that he was. He hoped that he wasn't.

“I did. Mr Park was my Year 9 History teacher. He was the first person that made History interesting. He sparked my interest in the field. Though my fascination with it has grown since then, my experiences as his student, were really what first opened me up to, the thing I now consider the great love affair in my life.” Chunji explained, voice quivering with the emotion behind his words.

“Mr Park? So you're a History buff? I mean I knew you studied it, but I didn't realise you were that good at it.” L. Joe questioned, looking over at Chunji for the first time in quite a while. He'd apparently given up on whatever he'd been trying to make, realising that the ice cream was melting, and would inevitably undermine whatever he'd been attempting to construct.

“I'm not sure about that.” Chunji coughed, uncomfortably, knowing that his cheeks probably turned a darker shade at L. Joe's words. For some reason, a comment like that felt like a compliment when it came from L. Joe. “I'm good at a lot of areas. But I enjoy History the most.”

L. Joe sent Chunji a blank look, as he answered, “I don't really understand what you like about History. The History they get us to learn in school is really boring.”

“So let me see if I've got this right. You find History boring. You find English unpleasant. Let me guess.... You enjoy Maths?” Chunji questioned, playfully, raking his eyes over L. Joe's face, assessing.

L. Joe stared at Chunji, a small smile gracing his features, before Chunji's eyes. “Well, I do like Maths, I suppose. Science is okay too. But I really prefer Economics.”

“Why is that?” Chunji enquired, nudging his ice cream around the plastic cup, thoughtfully. “I just like the feel of cause and effect, you know. There's something very cool about the idea that this one event has all these impacts that may or may not be expected. It really forces you to pay attention; makes you think.”

“So then how do you like Maths?” Chunji enquired, able to see how a comment like that could be applied to the Sciences and Economics, but not to the mathematical problems, L. Joe was probably solving in class. Wasn't maths just about finding the answer?

“Same reason, I guess. In all of them, there's some problem; the cause, and you're trying to find the solution; the effects. The only way they make questions more complicated is by getting you to do the same thing in reverse.” L. Joe explained, but he frowned, as though his own answers left him dissatisfied.

“At university level, History is kind of like that.” Chunji commented, idly, on his spoon, pleased to see intrigue lighting up L. Joe's gaze. “Really? How so?”

“Well, you get assessed in essay format, most of the time, okay? But, they don't give you broad task descriptions like they did with that Hamlet essay of yours. At university, your essays revolve around questions; problems that you're trying to solve, kind of like in maths. But your evidence comes from the interpretation of historical facts, rather than from a mathematical proof.” Chunji explained, excitedly.

He was pretty sure that his face was flushed, but he couldn't help it. L. Joe's smile grew, twitching slightly, as though he were just barely controlling his desire to laugh at him. “What do you enjoy about History? What do you learn about?”

Chunji paused for a moment, not really knowing what to say. He actually had plenty to say on the matter, and he generally adored the thought of someone asking him about his interests, looking at him as genuinely intrigued as L. Joe was. That was kind of why Chunji found his words unable to escape from his mouth.

“I've learned about lots of different things while I've been studying History. You can never just study History. You study the society. You study the economics. You study the politics. But no matter what, you're learning about a lot of different things, and I like that. I could study any of those things, and be happy. I've studied Ancient and Modern, Western and Asian History. I've loved all of it.” Chunji confessed.

“But what about it all do you like? What do all these different aspects share in common?” L. Joe pressed.

“Cause and effect.” Chunji confessed, with a strangled half-laugh. He hadn't realised that he and L. Joe would be able to enjoy a shared appreciation for something, given their vastly differing interests; their different ages. He felt so close to L. Joe right now. It felt like everything else had stopped existing; that they were bonding on some deeper level. It felt important and special.

“In any History, there is an element of storytelling; a tale about what it was like; what did happen, and how it progressed, and transformed into what came afterwards. But at the same time, there are all these little moments, where you can just see that things didn't have to turn out this way; that there were all sorts of possibilities, and perhaps far more causes than you might've thought behind what happened. It's so amazing seeing all of those things laid out before you; sifting through a sea of stories, to find the pieces you need to construct your own retelling of the past. It's beautiful.”

“I don't recall studying anything like that in my History classes.” L. Joe said, sounding a little put out. If Chunji didn't know better, he would've thought that L. Joe was pouting at him, given the tone he used. He found himself glancing over at the younger boy, wondering if perhaps he'd thought wrong.

He hadn't.

“I think that can be blamed on the difference between High school and university level History. You won't really notice it at first. But university is a completely different environment; it's an adult learning space. They treat you like adults, and in response your mind matures too. High school is about memorisation of facts, and regurgitation in exams. University encourages more thought; a freer mode of thinking.” Chunji explained, sympathetically. Despite knowing what he was saying was true, he still didn't really expect anyone to understand what he meant. It was one of those things you just had to experience, to be able to comprehend it fully.

“I suppose you have to be at university to be able to understand what you're talking about, right? To be able to sense this difference in atmosphere?” L. Joe queried, sounding kind of amused, and entranced by what Chunji described, despite clearly implying that he didn't really understand everything Chunji was saying. The fact that he could talk like that; sound so genuine, more than made up for his lack of comprehension. People didn't respond to comments like this, in that sort of way, often.

“Yeah. You'll understand when you go into university next year.” Chunji agreed, amicably.

The two boys drifted into silence for a moment, before L. Joe started fiddling with his armrest, idly. He looked so shy and cute like that, curled up in his seat, Chunji kind of wished that he could hug the other boy. It felt like it would have suited their close relationship at this moment, and yet he couldn't bring himself to move.

It still didn't feel like a wise idea to initiate contact with a school kid. Even if there were only a few months difference in their ages. To Chunji, those few months, might as well have been years. He felt like any contact would shatter the tenuous innocence surrounding their current friendship. He felt like it would be taboo.

“You know, I don't even know what I'm going to do about university next year?” L. Joe commented, trying to sound light and feathery, and yet their was an edge to his words that Chunji felt more so than heard. It felt terrified; almost hysterical. This felt like something important; something that had been building up within the younger boy, that he'd been unable to express to anyone else around him.

Chunji couldn't help but wonder why. What did his comment mean? Was this just the nerves of a young boy, who feels intimidated by the exams that are fast approaching? Or was he serious? Had he been legitimately considering this plan for some time? Did he have a plan in mind? Did he feel like he couldn't talk about this with his friends? His mother? Why?

But he didn't allow any of those questions to slip from between his lips, biting down on his bottom lip harshly, when he felt his mouth might betray his wishes.

L. Joe paid Chunji's silence no mind, clearly guessing that Chunji must have been desiring to know what he meant. He did tend to talk without really explaining what he meant. He usually didn't give people enough details. He was the one that wanted Chunji to know about this. He was the one that felt Chunji needed to know about all of this; his plans. He didn't need to be told that he should keep speaking.

“My parents... They got divorced last year. It was pretty messy; there was a lot of fighting. There was a lot of anger and a lot of pain over the way things happened. My mother got custody of me, as part of an agreement between the two of them. She brought me back here, while my father still lives in the US.... Ever since she dragged me back here, I told myself that I was going to go back. That I'd finish high school, and then I'd return to the US, where I'd go to university, and stay for the rest of forever, never looking back.” L. Joe confessed, his fingers clenching, from dark emotions Chunji didn't know and couldn't hope to understand.

There was so much about what L. Joe had said that Chunji wanted to question. He wanted to know why L. Joe seemed displeased that he was with his mother. He wanted to know why he wanted to go back to the US so badly. He wanted to know why it sounded like maybe L. Joe had changed his mind. He wondered which part L. Joe might've changed his mind about; his mother or his return to the US. But every one of those questions felt too intimate; too personal. He didn't feel like he had a right to ask for any of those answers. Instead he d around, and eventually settled for the much more neutral, “What do you want to study?” surprised to feel how he almost choked on his question.

He could feel the tell tale burning behind his eyes, that told him he was about to cry. He hadn't realised that L. Joe would be leaving his life almost as soon as he'd entered into it. He hadn't thought he'd be so sad to see him go. He wasn't exactly the best at saying goodbye to someone he cared about.

He hoped L. Joe wouldn't notice the slight huskiness in his voice; the tremor of his emotion or the watery glisten to his eyes. He'd probably just for being stupid and sentimental. It's not like he'd be able to change L. Joe's mind about leaving anyway; he was so stubborn, and he probably had a really good reason for leaving, anyway.

L. Joe observed the older boy, thoughtfully for a moment. “Business. I'm not too sure what I'll study specifically, but I don't really care one way or the other. But if History classes turn out as interesting as you say, maybe I'll take up some of them, for my electives.” he joked. Chunji smiled, but he knew it wasn't a full smile.

He just couldn't get over the idea of continuing on without L. Joe around, pestering him. He'd gotten used to having L. Joe bugging him. He'd gotten used to CAP's quiet presence on campus, a constant reminder; a constant connection to L. Joe even when the younger boy was absent. He was getting used to having a friend around all the time. He really hadn't considered the idea that L. Joe might be leaving him soon, and he found the knowledge hard to accept, all of a sudden.

If he wasn't careful, he really might start tearing up.

“But I mean, I'm not sure I'm even going to go anymore.” L. Joe confessed, trying to relieve some of the tension he felt building up. He couldn't tell whether that tension was between Chunji and himself, or within himself. “Why not?”

“Because, stuff has been getting kind of unpleasant as of late. I've always just figured that I'd move back in with my dad, and everything would be fine. He seemed cool with the idea, when we left, but since then he's gotten remarried, and he's getting distant. I'm starting to get the idea that he might not want me to come back.” L. Joe explained, dully.

Chunji wasn't sure what he should say in response to a comment like that. He wanted to say that he couldn't believe that L. Joe's dad wouldn't want him back. He wanted it to be true, just because he couldn't imagine not wanting L. Joe around these days. But then, who was he to say what L. Joe's father may have wanted. Maybe L. Joe was right on the money?
 

“I... What brought all of this on, all of a sudden?” Chunji enquired breathlessly. He didn't think that L. Joe had ever revealed so much about what was going on in his life, before. Some part of him had doubted that L. Joe would ever reveal this much about what was going on in his life. He had never thought L. Joe would have so much going on, behind his impersonal facade. He wasn't sure how to process all of this, or what L. Joe would want to hear in response.

L. Joe shifted slightly, clearly feeling uncomfortable about what he was about to say, which struck Chunji as being odd. For someone that was so secretive about what was going on in his life. His family issues. His future plans. His uncertainty about his parents love for him. He had expressed all of this, so easily; without embarrassment or concern. Why should he be concerned now; what could he possibly have to say that would make him feel so uncomfortable, now?

“It was my music performance, actually.” L. Joe explained. “How did that go, by the way?” Chunji queried, happily. “It went well.” L. Joe stated, easily. “Anyway, the performance was a practice run for the talent show coming up. They told us that we should invite all the friends and family we could, to our next performance.”

“I wanted to invite you to come see me perform.” L. Joe explained, eyeing his knees, uncomfortably, “Except then I realised, that despite the fact that although I did want you to come; that I really liked the idea of seeing you there, that I've never really, opened up and talked with you. About anything. Your interests or mine. So I had to fix that, the only way I could think of.”

“By talking with me, like this?” Chunji questioned, kindly.

L. Joe quirked a grin, he was only too pleased to flash at Chunji, “Well what else was I going to do? I wasn't about to revoke your invite to the performance. That's for my pleasure, not yours.” He paused, momentarily, eyeing Chunji nervously, from his relaxed position in the passenger seat. Anyone could easily have been forgiven for thinking that L. Joe didn't care at all about what he was saying to Chunji, but the older boy could feel the waves of tension rolling off of the other boy beside him. “So, would you like to come?”

“Of course I would.” Chunji answered, a matching grin, adorning his face.