“You’re late.”

               Like the all-knowing eyes of an angry god, Wu Fan’s gaze bore into my soul, furious and questioning. A shiver sent my skin prickling as I nervously met his gaze. His eyes were a mix of emotions as he lifted his hand and beckoned me to him. I stayed rooted in my spot and pulled my tank top on fully.

               “What were you doing out so late Jihyun?” He gritted his teeth in an obvious attempt to keep from lashing out. The thought of his uncontainable wrath frightened me. I had only before witnessed it over a phone call, what would happen when in the same room as him? I cringed as I imagined the possibilities. “You haven’t answered my question.” My gaze shakily met his again and he sighed. His face turned stony, his emotions a mystery, as he crossed his arms defensively over his chest. Taking a deep breath, I tried to muster some strength. Facing him fully, I locked my gaze with his.

               “I was having dinner with Chunji. I didn’t think that was against any of the rules set since I wasn’t to be around you lot today. It wasn’t a big deal.” I finished confidently and turned back to my bag, folding my new shirt neatly.

               “Let me guess, he got you that as well, didn’t he?”

                “Look, I had to deal with Chunji being an , and I don’t need it coming from you.” I snapped at Kris, venom dripping in my words. The male silently rose from the bed and stalked over to me as I let my head droop.

               “I’m only asking because I’m worried about you Jihyun. I don’t want you to get hurt again.” His warm chest pressed against my back and an arm slipped around my waist. I tensed slightly, and stepped from his embrace.

               “Too late for that.” I mumbled and started getting some of my things together.

               “What do you mean?” His voice hardened behind me and I cringed at my own actions. “This isn’t just about Chunji anymore is it?” He pressed, causing me to bit my lip in regret of speaking.

               “He made a valid point is all. Never mind, you wouldn’t understand.” I picked out a pair of long jeans and a t-shirt before zipping up my bag. Turning, I pushed past him and entered the bathroom.

               “Jihyun, what the hell are you talking about?”

               “Chunji made a point about you and Amber and it made me think. The more I do reflect on it, the more I find he’s probably correct.” I crossed to the desk on the opposite wall and unplugged my charger from the wall. Speaking again, I played with the cord between my fingers. “The spark that Chunji and I had when we were first together, that feeling you can just see between the two peoples’ eyes, you and Amber have that. I’m not going to deny it. The way you look at her, the way you two talk backstage, how you act together onstage, all of it. It’s all signs that you have completely fallen for her.” I placed my hands on my hips and faced him fully. I hadn’t heard him approach, and jumped back, pressing against the wall, when I noticed that he was only inches from me.

               “When did this come down to a nonexistent relationship instead of you being with your ex-boyfriend for a night and what he did?”

               “When he said something that made me believe you would be far happier with Amber, since you’ve already started.” I spat at him, glaring darkly. “What.” Suddenly, he dipped forward and crashed his lips against mine. I whined involuntarily against his force and his soft tongue pressing between my lips. I relented and let him in, his tongue quickly brushing against mine before he pulled away all too soon.

               “You’re not telling me everything, Jihyun. Why do you taste different?” His dark inquiry sent a shiver down my spine. “Was it voluntary?” I just looked back at him and he took a step away. I knew he was getting furious at my lack of words, but I was at a loss of what to do. “What do you feel for him JIhyun?!” His palm clammed against the wall beside my head, pain and anger b in his eyes. I shrunk back against the wall at my back at the rage flowing from his breath. Searching for any coherent thought in my mind, my bottom lip quivered as my body couldn’t do anything else. I was frozen in my spot, though unsure whether from fear of him or fear for the truthful answer, I wasn’t sure. “Don’t you dare give me that look! Answer me!”

               “I don’t know!” I yelled back in his face and pushed him, trying to slip past him and out of the spotlight. He grabbed my wrist, crushing any hope of me escaping his prying questions to which I had no answer, and pinned me up against the wall.

               “What do you mean you don’t know? It’s not a difficult question.” I bit my lip, falling silent before him, fighting for an answer in my thoughts. “Then answer this: How do you feel about me?”

               “Wu Fan, you know I love you! That’ s as clear as day! With Chanhee though, it’s fuzzy. I really can’t explain how I feel about him because my emotions run together!” That was as best of an answer as I could give him. It was the truest answer as well. My feelings about Chunji ran together like watercolors, warping the edges into a curl to send me back to the middle of the page, and any clear line disappearing wherever I looked. My voice cracked as I searched for anything else to help explain to Kris. “He cheated on me and I ran to you.” I started, but stopped myself, as the path of thought became blurred again. “I don’t know what else to say to you, Kris!” That was true. My mind was as clear as mud. Nothing made sense, opinions, feelings, and obligations were pounding into my skull as though each of them would be the thing to swing me to one person or the other.

               “Do you still love him?” I opened my mouth, but speech escaped my throat. Did I? Did I love him? Though we had fought, I still felt safe with him. Was I even able to still love him while not wanting to be with him again? Did part of me still want him back? Being with Chanhee was easy, carefree, and made sense. Was that how it was supposed to be? Easy? As I searched for another answer, Kris’ head fell. “You do.” Getting fed up with him accusing me relentlessly, I gather a breath and took a different direction.

               “I didn’t think that I would have to explain this to you. What happened to trust?” darkness entwined and spat out my words. It was harsher than I intended, and I nearly regretted it as soon as it fell silent between us again. His dark eyes lifted, gaze meeting mine without any gentles left.

               “Maybe you should’ve asked yourself that before you accused me of being with Amber.” He shot back with a growl.” Now he was past his limit as well. I knew I had to get away before this escalated any further. Maybe what I needed to define my thoughts and heart was space. If I could get away from it, maybe things would clear up. I wouldn’t have opinions and everyone in the country telling me what I should and shouldn’t do for myself and the people I cared for.

               Shaking my head, I wrenched my wrists back and pushed past him. Swinging my suitcase up onto the bed, I took out a sweated and then secured everything. I looked around the room once to make sure I had everything with me that I would need.

               “What the hell are you doing?” Kris moved beside me and glared at me, crossing his arms over his chest.

               “I’m leaving. Apparently we need time to ourselves.” I grabbed the handle of my suitcase and walked past him.

               “Ji…” He started as I opened the door. He realized I was completely serious, and started forward. “Jihyun, wait. Don’t do this to us.”

               “We did this when we jumped together too soon again. Four years can’t just magically heal a person.” I shut the door without looking back at him, knowing I would give up and run back if I had. With a tight frip on my things, I ran downt he hall and into the vacant elevator.

               “Jihyun!” Hearing his pained shout, I smashed the button to close the elevator doors. Just before the metal met, I looked up to see him running for the door. The elevator started its descent and I rested my head against the cool metal, a heavy sigh causing a heaviness in my chest.

               “I’m sorry, Wu Yi Fan.” I whispered into the silence.

---

               “Remember to call; I’ll try to come down during fall or winter break, okay?” Wu Fan cupped my cheeks gently and brought me closer, pressing his lips softly against mine. “It’ll go faster than you think, babe. We’ll see each other soon.” The horn of a car resounded from behind us and I turned to flip Eunji off.

               “Well if you would hurry your up!” She yelled out with a cheeky grin. I turned back to Wu Fan, who gently brought me against his chest. I focused on his heartbeat, never feeling more vulnerable in my life than at this moment. Leaving Wu Fan was going to be the thing that broke my last bit of resolve. When he felt that I would be alright, he pulled us away from each other and smiled gently. I blinked a few times before feeling my heart flutter, sending me back to reality.

               “Thanks Penguin, I won’t forget you.” He laughed once before focusing on me with that breathtaking smile.

               “You better not, I expect a fantastic reuniting party when I come down.” He winked at me playfully and I pushed him, rolling my eyes at him. He took my hand and pulled me back to him, crushing his lips against mine in a loving, longing kiss. Eunji honked again and I was the one to step back this time. Wu Fan tucked a lock of hair behind my ear and ran the back of his fingers against my cheek. “Until next time, then.” He promised with his smile, and I smirked.

               “Don’t forget to miss me.” I squeezed his hand once more before running around and slipping into the passenger seat of Eunji’s car.

               “I swear, you two are like a romantic movie.” She shook her head and pulled away.

               “Jealous much?” I sneered at her before turning took look at him waving lazily at the car before we turned a corner. Turning back around, I settled back against the seat, smiling to myself. “What a pretty smile.”

---

               “Jihyun?” I looked up, seeing my mother, holding a grocery bag, and a gas station only a few steps away. Coming out of my mindless daze, I shook my head. I looked around, noticing I had gotten about three blocks away from the hotel in my senseless wander. My eyebrows furrowed and I closed my eyes as I reoriented myself. When I opened my eyes, my mother had approached me, worry etched in her face. “What are you doing out here so early?”

               “Mom, can I stay with you?” I avoided her question, and tried to get a hold on myself. Her small hands clasped my free one and I felt the tears welling up. She didn’t know me as well as dad, but she was still one of the two people I was closest to, and had a way of making me feel everything, even if I tried to hide it.

               “For as long as you need, sweetie.” She set down her bag and wrapped her arms around me. My tears started dancing down my cheeks as I hugged her back.

               “I don’t know what to feel anymore, or who to feel it for. I go to one and then I hurt the other. I never wanted this to happen.” I cried into the Heavy Anaheim air as my mom rubbed circles against my back. Minutes passed before I had calmed down enough and she pulled back, patting my arm.

               “Let’s go back to the hotel. We’ll go home first thing in the morning.” I nodded, wiping my face with my sleeve and taking my suitcase again. “Mountain air might do you some good.”

---

A/N: Agh! I feel like such a terrible author. I'm sorry I haven't updated.

I hate school. Simple as that. Too much stuff to do and no time to do it in.

Thank you guys for still reading this story! I love you guys so much!

~Lynn