Seungri felt a strange flop in his stomach. His heartbeat was erratic and he felt his hands shaking. It was all he could do to keep his lips from quivering.

Seungri was scared.

Not because his life was in danger or because he was in trouble.

He was scared of revealing his feelings. He was scared to sing Jiyong's new song.

Everyone was busy at work in the recording studio, reading over their lines and listening to the demo recording that Jiyong had made earlier with Teddy. The song had a syncopated upbeat and the melody built up in layers, some parts soft and sweet while other parts were more pleading and powerful. The song, as Jiyong had stated earlier, was about a man afraid to confess to the girl he loved. The lyrics were like a message to the man to just gather up the courage and confess.

Seungri was assigned to sing the bridge. It was torture to sing, not because it was in a challenging octave or included lots of vocal rifts, but because it was the part of the song that had to be the most soft, the most convincing, and the most raw. Seungri had to spend the most time in the recording booth of all the other band members because he just couldn't get it right. Jiyong was wearing out the maknae's vocal cords, making him try out different varieties of singing styles. There was whisper-singing in a volume so low it almost couldn't be heard. Then there was more of a belting out style like Daesung was best at, which didn't work. In addition he tried out nasal-singing, sounding like he was whining, which also didn't work out. Jiyong made him record his part over and over again with different inflections, and the leader even started ordering the maknae to imagine different visuals in his head while singing. Try anything and everything to get the right sound, to please Jiyong.

In addition to being frustrated because of the recording process, there was also the problem with the lyrics that he had to form with his lips. It was hard to get the words out of his mouth. It was painful. He kept slurring the lyrics out-he couldn't articulate.

Don't be afraid, just say it.

Speak tenderly, she'll listen.

There are things more intimidating than rejection.

There are things more important than pride.

It was was if the hidden Seungri, the Little Seunghyun from Gwanju who had feelings for his hyung, was speaking to him. It was like having a conversation with himself, and it was a heartfelt, serious talk at that.

"One more time, Seungriyah. Get it right."

This was the fifteenth time now. It was getting harder to hold back the frustration. Seungri felt his eyes trying to water. He couldn't stop his lips from quivering much longer.

And so, he sang it again. Unfortunately his lips finally started quivering and his voice was shaky and scratchy.

"Damn it, maknae!" The leader snapped.

Seungri couldn't handle this anymore. He stormed out of the studio before Jiyong could rant at him.

Seungri ran. He dashed through the hallway and searched around for an empty room to hide in. Any room with an opened door would do.

He found his favorite sanctuary, the dance studio he often visited. He almost passed it by, thinking for sure someone would be using it. He realized he had assumed wrongly, however, and practically jolted inside the room, closing the door behind him and not bothering to turn on the lights. He could hide here. He was safe here, or at least he was most comfortable here.

So, he sat himself down on the hard floor in the center of the dance studio, curled his knees into his chest, folded his arms over his knees, and dug his head into his arms, sobbing quietly in the dark space. He finally let out his frustration.

Why is love so hard? Why am I breaking down? I'm supposed to be strong!

He was so engrossed in his thoughts and his head was still buried in his arms, so he didn't even realize when Jiyong had entered the room, let alone when the elder sat down right in front of him and wrapped his arms carefully around the maknae. Jiyong didn't want to break him. He hugged him gingerly, like he was made of glass. He had to be fragile.

"I'm so sorry," Jiyong sighed against his ears.

Seungri's breathing wasn't as shaky now. He had gained back some strength.

"I'm sorry too hyung," Seungri whispered. He didn't hug the elder in return, but he did lift his head to look at Jiyong who was staring at him with confusion.

"Huh? Why are you apologizing?"

Seungri's dark eyes looked directly into Jiyong's warm brown ones.

"For not being honest with myself. For not being the type of man that BIGBANG portrays themselves as in our songs and lyrics."

The leader hugged the maknae more tightly now. Seungri was gaining back his strength.

"Its okay, Seungriyah. You're unique. I love you that way."

Jiyong tenderly pressed his lips onto Seungri's, holding his chin with his thumb. Seungri kissed back, and then he decided to stop holding himself back. He continued returning the kiss, letting his lips spread apart wider to explore Jiyong's mouth. The elder accepted the invitation, exploring Seungri's mouth as well.

And that's when everything clicked. It suddenly made sense to say it.

Against their crashing lips, Seungri whispered his confession.

"I love you."