AUGUST 21ST 2016

SEUNGHYUN’S HOUSE

Yesterday our group just finished our 10th anniversary concert here in Seoul but instead of feeling happy about our anniversary, a part of me is also feeling very furious at an event that happened 1 week ago involving someone who’s very important to me. That someone is none other than my girlfriend of 2 years who’s none other than Girls’ Generation’s eye smile princess, Tiffany. You guys will definitely know what I’m talking about, right? I’m not going to go into detail of what happened, but I will give you readers a big clue: Something to express your feelings when you’re typing a message.

And to make it even worse, they ing kicked her out of the show that she’s currently a part of immediately after it happened. On top of that, she’s not handling it too well because she literally stopped talking to everyone including me, her own boyfriend. You couldn’t even imagine what I’m currently going through right now because I’m worried to death, and not just me also. The entire Soshibang family are also worried to death right now because of her alarming behavior. And don’t get me started on the leader couple because Jiyong is also having a hard time handling the Kid Leader who won’t stop crying seeing the state of her best friend going through something like this because she definitely can relate to her after what happened 2 years ago. Their group has been through a lot of and the last thing that I want to worry about is SM pointing a gun at Tiffany telling her to leave the group or else they will easily disband them like throwing the trash. Just thinking about it makes me want to throw up.

My house feels empty without her by my side even though it’s mine. She always brings some life to this empty big house and now staying in here without her who always come to my arms whenever she feels happy, sad, angry, etc. But this is different because whenever she’s sad, she always come to my house and just cried for hours until she smiled again using my clothes as the tissue and I found her very cute when she’s doing that thing that every girlfriend does to their boyfriends when they’re crying. Right now, she’s probably locking herself up in her house and getting drunk. Tiffany told everyone including me and the other members to not contact her until the situation dies down, that stubborn girl. So basically, we literally have no choice but to obey her words, but I can’t help but to think of disobeying her orders.

It's been literally a ing week since that goddamned post and there’s absolutely not a single text or call from Tiffany to me or her members, so imagine having your girlfriend go through something like this and instead of talking to you, she decided that she wants to be alone and doesn’t want to be bothered. Of course, it will literally make you worried to death because what if she did something that she would never do? Suddenly, my phone started ringing so I thought “Probably just work” and picked it up without a thought but as soon as the call started, I heard a breathing that I was too familiar with but there was something very off about it because it’s not normal breathing, but then she finally speaks into the phone only saying “Seunghyun oppa, where are you?” repeatedly so I thought to myself “You’re definitely drunk as right now” so I just let you doing your drunk talking session for a while because I ing miss your voice so much I’m going to literally be vaporized from existence if I suddenly stopped hearing your voice.

“Oppa, why does this happen to me? Am I a bad person, oppa?” hearing that from you just makes me want to break your rule even more. This is exactly why I ing hate the public, they will never think about their artist’s mental health, if an artist did something harmless but has a very bad consequences, they will literally just start typing on their stupid ing keyboard and begins to rain him/her down with an intense artillery rounds of hate comments, not caring about their reactions and feelings. The public will always think that people like us are not even decent human beings, they think of us as just a ing toy who always have to follow their orders or else suffer the consequences. But, as I was just in the middle of thinking about probably doing a massive lawsuit against the general public of Korea for not giving a about my girlfriend’s mental health, she spoke the words that I’ve been wanting to hear for these past one week “Seunghyun oppa, I need you. I’m scared.”

So, without hesitation at all, I grabbed my phone and got into my disguise car that we always use since we started dating and immediately hauled towards your house. It took less than 20 minutes to finally reached your place because of the speeding. Once I parked my car, I immediately sprinted through 20 flights of the emergency stairs because of someone that’s very important to me. Finally, after running up about 20 flights of stairs, I arrived in front of your apartment and immediately entered the passcode which is our first day as a couple. Once the door was opened, I was immediately slapped in the face by the smell of alcohol which definitely almost made me cry at the sight. I should’ve broken her rules but at the same time I don’t want to upset her even more. When I look inside her apartment, everything seems perfectly normal because it still looked like a place that a person is living here. She’s probably inside her bedroom because that’s exactly what I would do if I was her if I want to shut myself out from the cruel and unforgiving outside world.

Now, I’m standing in front of her bedroom door and immediately knocks at the door softly while putting my ear on the door to listen at any sounds or movements from the other side. I heard nothing from the other side, so I try to open it and good thing it’s unlocked. Once I’m inside the bedroom, it was totally dark and I wanted to turn on the light but I’m afraid that would make you angry. I then walked towards the direction of the bed and true enough I saw the blanket has been turned into a burrito shape. “Cute” I thought but now it’s the time to make a joke because she needs help right now. Then, I sat on the side of the bed facing away from her. “Tiff?” I called her softly only to be replied with nothing, so I called her again with the same results.

There’s only one way left to do and that is to uncover the blanket, so I slowly reached my hand out to the hem of the blanket and pulled it over very stealthily just enough for me to take a look on what’s inside and what I saw would be very unexpected because I was instantly greeted by the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen and even though she definitely reeks of alcohol but her face is very much similar or ev