“Let him be. He deserves it.”

Changmin sighed. He putted down the newspaper which had the article of Jaejoong collapsing due of tiredness after his show abroad. “Come on hyung, he’s still our member no matter what.”

“He went out of DBSK and still calling himself and Yoosu JYJ of TVXQ?” Yunho snorted. “I wonder if there’s something funnier than that.”

“Hyung, he’s struggling here. He, Yoochun, and Junsu hyung released an international album, performing at Tokyo Dome, shooting dramas, and went to Peru. Why can’t you just accept the fact that he’s trying to live not under SM?”

Yunho didn’t answer, and Changmin called it a quit.

~~~

Changmin smirked as Yunho growled when surfing the TV channels and stopped on news. Jung Yunho never watched news. Well at least when it’s not about JYJ or more important, Jaejoong.

“What are you looking for on the TV hyung?” Changmin asked, faking confused.

“Nothing. Something’s good.”

“Like what?”

“… anything.”

“Hmm… sure. What about JYJ’s concert—”

“I don’t care about them!”

“It’s on MNet channel.”

“What? Where?”

Changmin smirked again.

~~~

Despite how strictly Yunho prohibited it, Changmin was quite a night owl. He stayed awak until past midnight for some snacks, not caring about his weight which barely increased even after he ate pounds of whatever meal he found.

But that night he was awake not for meals. Well maybe at first he was, but his appetite went away, replaced by amusement which made him forgot his hunger. All thanks to a conversation Yunho secretly made with Junsu in the kitchen.

“What? How can you let him still helping the staffs with the outfit stuffs when he’s sick?”

The leader went quite as Junsu replying. Then he groaned and said, “What the—he’s the director? But I thought he’s the director for your previous concert!”

Changmin’s smirk once again made its appearance.

“Still, you must not make him overly exhausted! He’s so tired that he’s fainted and must get an IV! Why can’t you take care of your hyung, heh?”

If it wasn’t because of his strong teeth holding his lip, Changmin would laugh out loud now. He swore three hours ago Yunho said that Jaejoong deserved to be overly exhausted.

“Does he change his number?” This is getting more interesting?

“Really? Send it to my phone then.”

Even since Jaejoong left DBSK with Yoochun and Junsu, Yunho kept saying that he hated Jaejoong, hated the eldest to the gut. In amusement, Changmin thought why did the leader hated Jaejoong. Because the leader called him every day and Jae never replied to them due to his business? Because Jaejoong starred a drama and kissed a girl? Because he went abroad and made Yunho worried?

Maybe all of them. Changmin laughed loudly inside. He never imagined his hyung would be this silly, this stupid.

“Alright, thanks. And Su, I know you’re still contacting Changmin and making Yoochun almost burn himself in jealousy for how often you and Changmin fight in online games.”

It was right. Changmin and Junsu fought a lot. A day without Minsu fighting wasn’t a normal day for them.

“Don’t you dare telling him this.”

~~~

Yunho loved playing games at arcade. Sometimes his friends would ask him to come with them to that electric eater place or even better, bowling alley. He would accept them all. Except this one, which shockingly from Donghae who asked him after their performance on MNet Countdown.

“I’m going to meet my sister for dinner.”

Sister or lover? Changmin snorted.

~~~

Sometimes Yunho felt like a stalker. Browsing like crazy for Jaejoong’s newest update, reading his tweets, and now, going to his place. But he didn’t want to be one of them, who had put JYJ into hardships and stress. He was just curious. And worried. And… curious. And some other things. Maybe he missed him?

Missed?

Yunho’s eyes widened at the thought. For a split second he didn’t realize that he was driving to Jaejoong’s luxurious residence area in his slick black car he just bought. Paparazzi could catch him anytime. Even worse, stalkers.

Arriving at the main gate, Yunho gave his ID card to the guard. The man was shocked as he saw his name.

“Jung Yun—”

“Ssh!” Yunho glared, putting his forefinger in front of his lips, his other hand stretched out to muffle anything that would come out of the guard other of his surname. “Don’t tell anyone. Don’t you dare to!”

“Mhm, mhm…” the guard nodded awkwardly and let Yunho came in.

Yunho had texted Junsu, asking the younger where Jaejoong lived. He felt uneasiness after he called the younger last night. Almost as if someone was eavesdropping his conversation (well he didn’t know there was).

Stopping in front of a manor house, Yunho released a relieved breathe. There was no stalker following him around. Or that was he knew.

He went out of his car, frowning as he felt as if he was forgetting something? Presents? Nah. Flowers? Jaejoong didn’t like those kinds of stuffs. So what did he forget? A long speech of I’m-sorry-but-I-don’t-actually-hate-you?

Or…

Yunho slapped his forehead, hardly.

Jaejoong was the hospital, having his IV treatment to cure his tiredness. Therefore, he was not home.

“Stupid!” Yunho shouted to himself and grasses underneath his feet.

“Who’s stupid?”

Yunho stiffened. There was Jaejoong, looking at him from an opened window from the second floor, smiling. On his arm was a needle connected to a supported tube filled with crystal clear liquid. “Is it me?”

No, it’s me for not realizing how worried I am. “Yes! You are so stupid for tiring yourself!” Yunho could almost taste the lies in his words.

Jaejoong chuckled. He looked behind and said, “Su, go open the door.”

~~~

Changmin’s phone vibrated. a text message from Junsu. In an instant, he opened it with a grin.

Should I let these lovebirds alone? Or I can play with Yunho hyung’s nerves? It’s been so long.

He laughed aloud, making his driver and his manager who sat beside him looked at him weirdly.

~~~

If you do, I need to prepare your coffin and grave today.

Junsu sighed. He glanced at Yunho who looked around the huge mansion. At the pictures of Jaejoong and his friends, the awards, CD collections, books, and other knick knacks. He seemed so marveled at the things.

Awkwardly, he said. “Umm… Jae hyung is upstairs.”

“I know.”

“I told Jae hyung I should leave now.”

Yunho turned and looked at him in shock. “What? Now?”

“Err… yes. I need to go to my musical rehearsal.”

“But I—” Before he could even finish his sentence, Junsu ran out.

Yunho was still there, dumbfounded. What he should do now? He was in Jae’s place; there was no way he would go out again. He… he needed to know how was the elder doing.

Well, that meant he was worried, right? Yunho growled at the thought.

He found a stairs, hesitantly going up. But then he found a long corridor. He didn’t know where Jaejoong’s room was, so he walked along it, still in hesitance.

“Here,” Jaejoong said from a room “the third door on the right.”

The leader followed the order. He found Jaejoong was sitting in front of a piano but didn’t face it. He still looked a little pale.

“I miss you.”

“I don’t.” Yunho’s voice was firm. Again, he tasted lies.

“I know.” Jaejoong turned to look at him and smiled. “How’s you and Changmin going?”

“We’re okay. How’s—”

“We’re still a little tired from the tour, but the rest is fine.”

“Oh.”

The atmosphere was awkward and Yunho felt uncomfortable. This man, his lover, was in with him, in his room. They had broken up, not officially. So… that meant they’re still together, right?

“Have a seat Yun, make yourself at home,” Jaejoong suddenly said, got up from his seat. He held the support for the IV, and Yunho decided he didn’t like the scene.

“Where are you going?” Yunho asked, sitting on an armchair near a bookshelf.

“Safest place I could find.” Jaejoong approached him, and before Yunho knew it, he sat on his lap.

“Wha—”

“I wasn’t kidding when I said I miss you.” Jaejoong putted his head on Yunho’s shoulder. “And I miss this Yunho. No matter how much you hate me, don’t get up now.” At the elder’s plea, Yunho felt tears b in his eyes. He missed this too, where he could hold him with no worry of articles saying ‘Jung Yunho Pay a Visit to Kim Jaejoong?’.

“I don’t want to,” Yunho whispered. “At least I know you’re okay now.”

“Why are you here, Yunho ah?”

He should prepare an answer. But he didn’t. “I don’t know.”

“Do you miss me? Did you lie when you said you don’t?”

Yes, I did. “I’m worried about you, stupid.” Yunho tightened his hold. A tear fell down slowly from his left eye. “So worried. Stop making me worry.”

“Sorry.” Jaejoong chuckled. “Did you want to see me? Do you still?”

“I… maybe.”

“That’s enough. At least you don’t say no.” Jaejoong wrapped his arm which wasn’t stuck with the IV around Yunho’s neck. “I would never like the sound of someone I love saying they don’t want to see me.”

“What?”

“I love you, Yunho ah. I do, and I will always do.” He let a tear wetted Yunho’s shirt. “No matter… no matter how much you hate me.”

Yunho didn’t say anything. Not until he was half asleep in the comforting warmth.

“I love you too, stupid.”

~~~

The first thing Jaejoong noticed when he woke up was that it was early morning already. He was right, his clock on the bedside table showed 7 AM.

Wait, why did he woke up on his bed instead of—

“Stop moving. You woke me,” said a voice behind him. A pair of arms hugging him from behind tightened, and his body was dragged closer to a chest. Jaejoong chuckled.

“Sorry, Yunho-Bambi.”