He sat staring at his phone and the contact the appeared on the screen. He had been sitting there for half an hour contemplating whether or not to press the call-button. He had been on his computer when he had seen an article that made his breath hitch and his body numb. “Former Super Junior member Hangeng planning wedding with Chinese actress Jiang Kai Tong”. Now he tried to decide whether or not to call him to hear if it was true, if Hangeng had really, totally replaced him. He felt completely empty and very scared as he pressed the green button and slowly lifted the phone to his ear. His heartbeat sped up with every ring until he could barely hear anything but the pounding of his heart. He was so out of it that he didn’t even hear the greeting in the other end and only realised that Hangeng had in fact picked up the phone when a “Hello?” was heard a little while after.

“Hi,” he said and tried to swallow the huge lump that had formed in his throat.

“Who is this?” Hangeng asked and at that moment Heechul was ready to hang up. However, he pulled himself together and tried to find the diva-pride he was so famous for.

“You don’t even recognise your own best friend’s voice. Tsk, Hannie, I am disappointed,” Heechul said trying to sound as light-hearted as possible.

“Heechul…” Hangeng’s voice drifted off as he clutched his phone to his ear. He had definitely not expected Heechul to call or in any other way contact him ever again. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to talk to him. “What’s up?” he asked since he didn’t know what else to say.

“Nothing much… We are doing Super Show. Everyone’s busy. Eeteuk is really stressed out and I am beginning to worry about him quite a lot. He falls asleep the weirdest places. Wookie tries to take care of him but Teukie won’t listen. He’s so damn stubborn. Kyu is finally learning to show some respect for his elders and Sungmin has learned to play Star Craft so that is what they do when they are off schedule. Henry and Mimi still stand tall against the hate they receive. I am rather proud of them. Eunhae still cling to each other as octopuses or something like that. Siwon is busy with his acting on top of Super Show-schedules and Shindong and Nari finally got married. Yesung has gotten a new turtle again which I don’t quite understand but whatever….” Hangeng couldn’t stop the smile that spread on his face while Heechul rambled. It was usually a clear sign that the other was very nervous.

“And how are you, Rella?” Hangeng interrupted, purposefully using Heechul’s old nickname that only Hangeng was allowed to call him, which made Heechul shut up immediately. He hesitated to answer.

“I’m… okay,” he said and the silence filled the line. “Heebum misses you,” he then said since he couldn’t bring himself to tell his Chinaman that he missed him. Hangeng chuckled.

“Tell Heebum that I miss him too,” he said, getting what Heechul was really telling him. He knew how hard it was for Heechul to talk about how he felt, so he often used Heebum as a media to tell what he felt when he was insecure.

“So… how have you been?” Heechul asked, still with hesitation present in h