When Seungwan left the two in the room, Seulgi looked at the one reason she was MIA for almost a week. She fidgeted with the hem of her shirt, feeling nervous to be left alone in the same room with Joy. The other girl looking straight at her, eyes questioning, looking at all the paintings littered in her room, wanting an explanation for all these stuffs. 

Seulgi has no way out of this. She dug this hole on her own, now she has to face the music and bare her heart for the only girl who made her feel all sorts of things. The one person behind every painted portraits on her canvass. The one girl who made a home in her heart and painted every walls and covered every fissures with colors of the sun. 

Seulgi looked down at her hands, dirtied, covered in paint, ruffling the hem of her shirt.  She took a deep breath, calming her racing heart with a bit of difficulty – because how could she calm down, with Sooyoung looking at her with that questioning gaze, seeking answers only she could provide. 

As Seulgi tried to compose herself, she didn’t notice Sooyoung approach until she felt the younger girl’s hands take her own pair, keeping it from fidgeting and making her look up at the pair of orbs that holds so much confusion yet compelling her not to look away. 

Weird enough, Seulgi seems to gain confidence because of the hands holding hers firmly, keeping her grounded. She took a steadying breath before smiling that smile that Seulgi didn’t know would held so much effect to Sooyoung.

‘It’s now or never’, Seulgi thought.

“Sooyoung-ah,” as Seulgi uttered her name, Sooyoung shook her head as if in dazed. She looked at the older woman, eyebrows furrowed in confusion, lower lip caught between her teeth, eyes full of question but patient enough to let her unnie shed some light to what’s happening.

“I’m sorry I made you and Wan worried,” Seulgi continued, tone gentle and apologetic as she stared at the pair of eyes that she’s painted a lot but can’t seem to cover the depth of those pools. She stared at her muse, concentrating on the warmth from those hands that’s holding hers firmly, keeping her steady and in the present.

Seulgi looked down at their joined hands, wondering if she’ll still be able to hold it again after this. 

Nevermind, she thought.

“I’ve been too caught up with myself these days. Been trying to make sense to these feelings that intrude me at every waking hour,” Seulgi looked then at those eyes, basking in the warmth emanating from the other girl, “You know how painting helps me sort out my feelings, right? You know how I kind of get too carried away with it,” at the last word, Seulgi felt embarrassed to say that.

She felt a gentle squeeze from the pair holding her hand, Seulgi surprised but relieved for the patience that Sooyoung was willing to give, even when she doesn’t have that much patience to begin with.

‘Well, here goes,’ Seulgi squeezed her eyes shut for a moment before finally letting that last wall of defense break down. She let go of herself if only to hope that the other girl won’t turn away from her just because she felt something more for her.

“I’m in love with you, Sooyoung-ah.”

And there it is. 

Seulgi  felt her heart beat rapidly against her chest, that beating organ clamming up , breath shallow and almost heaving making her feel like she’s running a marathon. Sooyoung slowly let go of her hand, there fingers touching fleetingly until she felt it rest beneath the hem of her shirt. Seulgi looked down at her hands, warmth gone and empty, for a moment she thought this is what heartbreak  feels like. She hang her head low, lower lip bitten and worn, eyes shut wishing her tears won’t fall. 

If only until Sooyoung goes home.

 If only until she’s left alone.

They stood like that for a few minutes, both girls drowned in their own thoughts. One from her impending heartbreak, while the other processing the sudden confession that she can’t seem to shake out of.

Seulgi felt her eyes grow hot, hem of her shirt crumpled in between her tightened fist. Until the first drop of tears, she sniffed, unable to stop herself from crying. This heartbreak much worse than when her favorite character in that Kdrama died, or when Luffy lost her pirate crew at the Sabaody archipelago, or even when her parents didn’t let her have that pet dog she’s always wanted but instead indulging her more on her talent. Seulgi wanted so much to curl up into ball and just cry this pain away, Sooyoung’s silent rejection filling her with so much sadness she can’t carry.

Can she take back what she said? Is this the end of their friendship? Is she gonna lose Sooyoung just because of her premature confession? Is this really the end? 

As these questions clouded Seulgi’s mind, tears marring her cheeks, she felt a hand gentle cup the side of her face. She looked at Sooyoung in shock, mind unable to comprehend the to