Jungkook glances warily at her. Kyungha swipes her card. “That’s it?” She asks the younger.

He frowns. “Noona, that was pretty expensive.”

She snorts, “Halloween is an expensive holiday, and so is every other holiday. Besides, it’s like—what—once a year? I’m fine with spending money on you, you know?”

He smiles, sidling up to her. The rascal was in middle school, but he was almost her height. She couldn’t believe the midget was eventually going to grow over her. “Thanks, noona. You’re the best.”

“Are you going trick-or-treating?” Kyungha asks when the cashier hands them their bag. She briefly smiles and turns to lead him out of the store.

Jungkook hums, “yeah, Soleil kept begging me to go with her friends, so I guess I am.”

“You better save me all the kit kats,” she says pointedly.

He snorts, “is that all you care about?”

“Pretty much.”

Unlike her nephews and nieces, Kyungha had to work on Halloween. People went crazy during the holidays. Ordinarily, the amount of staff they had tonight would be overkill, but everyone was on alert today.

Jongdae who usually messed around and pranked others was noticeably antsy.

“Is it really that bad as y’all make it?” Joohyun asks beside her.

Kyungha scratches her nape, turning to look at Jongdae who gapes at the two.

He huffs. “Right, you’ve never worked on an actual holiday. Well, you see. There are two types of people. Responsible adults and irresponsible adults. You’d be surprised how many responsible adults become irresponsible adults.”

“Drunk driving, freak accidents, toys getting stuck in places you don't want to know, honey—buckle in,” Suzy elaborates with exasperation.

Kyungha glances down at her watch. It was still evening, around 5:30 PM. “Where’s Seulgi?” She asks Joohyun.

Joohyun grins, “she’s in Peds.”

“What? Again?”

“If I could, I would too. Dr. Oh is ing hot as hell. I wonder if he has a girlfriend,” Joohyun murmurs the last part to herself.

Jongdae snarls, “like I said, Joo-Joo. You’re not his type.”

“Shut up, I wasn’t talking to you,” she shoots back.

Suzy continues to smile through the bantering, and Kyungha knew what it felt like. She lived in a jungle. A jungle of Kyungsoo and Jongin, which also included a little kid with the name of Byun Taeyong.

Helpfully, she offers, “I think the last time I saw him with someone was maybe a year ago.”

Joohyun’s eyes widen as she inches forward her sister. “Really? Who?”

Jongdae snorts, smacking her lightly with his iPad. “Like you would know who.”

Kyungha’s eyes narrow at Suzy. “Who did he date?” Her tongue feels sandy as the question comes out. No one expected her to say anything, even herself. Honestly, why did she care? Oh Sehun could be with anyone he wanted, and it was none of her business.

She’s telling herself that, but Kyungha isn’t satisfied. It’s like putting a bandaid on a balloon with a tiny hole, but then there are other holes. No matter how many bandaids or excuses she forces on herself, she could still feel their air fissile out, leaving only her proverbial deflated balloon.

Was the balloon her heart? At first thought, no. But maybe—if she thought about it again. Then again, she shouldn't care. She hated Oh Sehun. But did she? Kyungha wasn't sure anymore and all that this thinking had done for her was just piss her off even more.

Jongdae clears his throat. “Aren’t you guys family friends? Didn’t he bring her to your family parties or something?”

Kyungha blinks, feeling her cheeks redden. “I—I stayed at Columbia. I didn’t come home for the holidays for four years.”

Her colleagues grow silent as they stare at her with confused looks. Joohyun, especially, looks shocked. “What the hell? Weren’t you lonely?”

And honestly, she was lonely. All the time. She missed Kyungsoo, Jongin, Soleil, Jungkook, and even Taeyong, which was a feat in itself. But Kyungha was in pain the entire time. She didn’t want to risk seeing him. Perhaps the time had finally healed her, but she still couldn’t forget about the suffocating pain she felt seeing him after what went on between them.

Kyungha had begun to feel the pinch in her chest at the memory she’d tried to bury deep inside the chest of pain and misfits in her heart, and that meant it was time for her to get some work done. It was useless to think about him and that.

“I think I vaguely remember her. Sehun introduced me to his girlfriend ages ago, but she wasn’t really that memorable. Damn, I completely forgot about her,” Jongdae wonders aloud.

Suzy nods. “I didn’t really like her. She was so controlling, and it felt like Sehun was her trophy.”

Joohyun perks her head up. “Wait, so who was she?”

“Dr. Park Minjung, she was a neurosurgeon here a year ago, but she’s in Mayo Clinic, doing some research on stem cells or whatever,” Jongdae answers with a dismissive tone.

Kyungha bites her tongue so hard that it begins to sting. The topic felt like a scar. It was something she didn’t want to hear about. His ex-girlfriends. The women he'd kissed. Touched. Hugged. Why did it hurt her? She couldn't answer that, but she knew that she wanted to go. Leave this god forsaken conversation.

She feels the whisper of an excuse form on her tongue, but before it could find its place in the world, someone taps her shoulder, and the words die in the back of .

Joohyun and Jongdae freeze like deers caught in headlights. “S-sehun?” Suzy stammers, pushing a twitching smile on her face.

Kyungha spins around, heart lurching when she realizes he’s right behind her. For 's sakes, what happened to being discreet?

Sehun throws them all a suspicious look. “Were you all talking about me?”

Joohyun blurts a sheepish, “no!” But if you must know, she’s a terrible liar. Jongdae pinches his temple, side glaring at his sister-in-law.

“We were just talking about our love lives, and then you came up,” Suzy explains quickly. It wasn’t really a lie. Kyungha is sort of impressed.

Sehun lifts a brow, but he doesn’t look like he was going to interrogate them any further. Then with a playful smile, he leans in closer to whisper in her ear, “I want to use my wish.”

“Right now?” Her eyebrows knit together. She didn’t trust him one bit. He gives her a look, and she only wrinkles her nose in response. They continue to speak with their eyes, mainly Kyungha throwing her suspicions at him and him slyly deflecting.

“So, are you both like—a thing?” Suzy asks, breaking their silent exchange.

Kyungha rolls her eyes. “Not in a million years.”

“She’s my little sister,” Sehun says at the same time. Her chest pangs. Why the would it hurt more when they were agreeing on the same thing?

Jongdae snorts, “y’all have got to be seriously dense as hell or have been secretly married behind our backs. There’s no way. Just no ing way.”

Joohyun presses her lips together. “Why? Can’t people of opposite genders simply be friends? Why does everything have to be romanticized?”

Kyungha nods, “exactly, but we aren’t friends either.”

Sehun makes a strangled sound. “You're so cold, sweetheart. Am I the only one who was given false hope?”

Suzy chuckles. “It’s so weird. You’d rather be her friend than date her? Hell, if I was gay, I’d definitely tap that sweet .”

Jongdae scowls. “Really, babe? Did you really think that was necessary?”

Kyungha purses her lips, not knowing what to do with herself. It’s always been there between them. For some reason, Sehun always took the initiative when it came to defining their relationship. To him, she was a friend or a little sister.

Kyungha didn't want to be either. She’d prefer strangers over anything else, but that was damn near impossible with him being her brothers’ best friend.

“Anyway, I’m going to steal Dr. Do for a bit. I’ll see you guys around later,” he bids, waving at them with a friendly smile. Meanwhile, he flicks a well-aren’t-you-going-to-follow-me? look in her direction.

She probably had no choice in this matter anyway. Kyungha waves listlessly toward her coworkers who are glancing between them with tentativeness.

Keeping up with Sehun turned out to be quite annoying. His long legs gave him a boost in his strides. She was already tired by the time they jogged upstairs to the pediatric ward.

“You good?” He asks, not looking back.

She glares at the back of his head. “Obviously. What did I say about stupid questions?”

“Then I’ll just ask you a smart one, sweetheart.” Kyungha hates the fact that she knew him so well. He was beaming, and she didn’t even need to see his face for confirmation. It was in his steps. She was pretty sure that they’ve gotten considerably lighter. And was he…was he bouncing? “When was the last time you trick-or-treated?”

Kyungha doesn’t bother to even pretend to ponder his question. “18 years ago on this exact date.”

“When was the last time you attended Kyungsoo’s Christmas party?”

“Four years, eleven months, and seven days ago.”

“And when was the last time we saw each other?”

“Thirteen hours ago.”

“Before here.”

Kyungha had no idea why she answered. She’d always been strangely good with dates, and Sehun was the only person who knew of her creepy skill, but he’d never seemed to be bothered with it. In fact, he was probably teasing her as of now.

The next words tumble out of before she could stop it. “Four years, eight months, and—“ She catches herself, her heart pounding away in her chest. The painful squeeze came back. Kyungha had to stop walking, yet her legs ached to run away. Pathetic. She was the pure definition of it.

Sehun turns to look at her, parting his lips slightly. “Creep.”

She flushes and resorts to avoiding his eyes like always. “Why am I even here, Hoon?”

He crosses his arms, but Kyungha’s never taken him seriously. Not with the goofy smile on his face. “Oppa. And I told you, I want to redeem one of my wishes.”

Kyungha rolls her eyes. “Well, are you going to let me know what it is or are we going to stand here forever?”

“If you weren’t such an adorable little thing, I would probably—“

She clears with more violence than she intended. But oh well, as long as it got the message across.

Sehun’s smile doesn’t waver as he continues, “anyway, we’re going trick-or-treating.”

Kyungha’s jaw unhinges. “We’re working,” she enunciates in case he didn't get the memo.

He begins to pick up his pace again, and Kyungha has to stumble after him. “I’m aware of that.”

“Then why are you—“

Kyungha stops to relinquish the sight of the pediatric ward, decorated with orange streamers and large Halloween cutouts. Parents are holding the hands of their children, each of whom is holding their own respective pumpkins filled with candy.

Sehun claps his hand. “This is my favorite part about Halloween. We get to give kids here the opportunity to be normal for one night.”

She’s silent when she heads toward him. He waves her over, and she had a feeling where he was taking her.

“Dani, your favorite oppa is here!” Sehun bellows in a honey voice.

Kyungha follows him from behind. She watches the little girl jump from her space-themed bed and excitedly hops over to them. Sehun picks her up, spinning her around. She squeals and giggles. After he sets her down, she finally notices Kyungha and her face glows with brightness, running to throw her tiny arms around Kyungha’s right leg.

Her heart melts as she caves and runs her fingers through the younger’s soft locks. “What are you supposed to be?” She asks, pulling away to catch sight of Dani’s costume.

Dani crosses her arms, wrinkling her nose as to say how-could-you? Kyungha glances over one more time, and with realization, she snaps her fingers. “Are you R2?”

Her eyes glimmer with excitement when she nods. Sehun chuckles, “how cute. You ready to go hunt for some treats?”

Dani holds out her arms, and Sehun complies, pulling her up on his shoulder. Kyungha feels a tiny whirring in her chest as she’s forced to admit to herself. He was going to be a good dad and husband to whoever he married.

Sehun and Kyungha visit the reception desk first to see the on-call nurse for the night. She beams at the two of them. “Are y’all taking our little princess around?”

“I’m afraid to know what she’d do to me if I hadn’t,” Sehun jokes as Dani shrugs innocently in his arms.

Kyungha snickers, “imagine being a grown man afraid of a child.”

Sehun lifts a brow in her direction. “I’m traumatized by you, especially by your mop of hair when you wake up in the morning.”

She grounds her jaw. “Fu—”

The nurse’s awkward laugh interrupts her in the middle of her words. And it was then that Kyungha realizes she’s still in the Pediatric ward with plenty of kids around them. She wasn’t going to convert them into little Taeyongs if she could help it.

Sehun is triumphant, and she ignores him. “So…Jill. Do you have any candy?”

Dani holds out her pumpkin. Jill smiles, nodding. She pulls out a giant bowl filled with an assortment of candy. The little girl doesn’t hold back as she grabs a handful, dropping them in her pumpkin.

The trio wave goodbye and turn to leave the ward for the cafeteria. When they arrive, Seulgi’s eyes are round when she sees Kyungha.

She stops picking at her burger to jog toward them. “So, what are you guys doing tonight?”

Kyungha scratches the nape of her neck. “Erm—we’re taking Dani trick-or-treating…”

Sehun excuses himself, walking toward the table with a heap of candy on top of it.

Seulgi watches his back, which makes Kyungha feel the twinge of suspicion. “Is there something going on?”

Her friend sighs, trying to hide her face. “Remember the party I told you about?”

Kyungha ponders this. She could vaguely recall Seulgi begging her to go drinking with the girl, so yes, she could remember. “The one last week?”

Seulgi nods, clasping her hands over her head. “I got really drunk, and I think—I think I slept with Dr. Oh.”

White noise.

Or maybe it was just her imagination because Seulgi is silent. And Kyungha is silent. She stares at her friend, not sure how she felt with this piece of information. “What do you mean?”

Her friend grimaces as she continues to recall. “I—uh— out from drinking, but I could make out some memories from the previous night.”

“And how did you come to that conclusion?” Kyungha’s tone picks up a sort of edge. She really didn’t want to know, so she didn’t quite understand the sudden strong urge to know.

Seulgi, thankfully, doesn’t notice. “I woke up in his apartment, . I also remember kissing him…”

Yep, Kyungha didn’t want to know anymore. Her stomach had churned and flipped, and she was going to hurl everywhere. “Did…did he talk to you? After you guys had ?” Her words continue to tumble out in what she could only regard as word vomit.

Seulgi smiles weakly. “He left just now." She signals awkwardly in his direction. "I don’t know what you want me to tell you.”

Her eyes roam to Sehun and Dani conversing across the room. She had no right to be pissed at Seulgi. It wasn’t like Sehun was hers, to begin with. And Kyungha definitely did not want that either way.

“I’m sorry.” The words feel awkward in .

Her friend rolls her eyes. “I don’t know why you’re apologizing. I’m completely fine. It’s not like I expected anything in return.”

After Seulgi and Kyungha catch up for a few more minutes, the girls say goodbye and Kyungha makes her way to Sehun, who is currently distracted by Dani.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to take so long,” she says, but her heart isn’t quite there. To be exact, Kyungha isn’t sorry. There’s a massive hole in her chest cavity, and it feels like there are maggots squirming within her heart. She didn’t know there were different types of flutters. Like the one she got when he was being despicably adorable. But right now, she just couldn’t put her hand on why it felt more painful. It was like someone stuck a saw in her ribcage and began sawing back and forth.

He gets up, carrying Dani again. “Let’s go,” he urges.

She follows behind the two silently, mostly distracted and not realizing that she hadn’t answered any of his questions. At the end of the night when they'd tucked Dani back into bed, Sehun whisks her off somewhere.

His hands aren’t as gentle when he drags her from Dani’s room to the back of the staircase.

Kyungha avoids his eyes. “What do you want?” She quips. His fingers feel like acid on her skin. It burns, and everything hurts. She just wants it to stop.

His brows draw together. “What’s going on with you?”

“Nothing. There’s nothing wrong. Would you let go already?” She’s resigned. Kyungha’s tired of him dragging her wherever and whenever he wanted. What about her? What about her wanting to stay away from him? Did he not respect that?

Sehun glowers. “Do you honestly think I’m stupid? I’ve been around you for ages. Hell, you’ve practically grown up around me. I can ing tell when you’re lying.”

“I’m not lying,” she spews.

“Then ing look at me when I’m speaking to you,” he snaps, and she does. Her eyes flicker to his face. His jaw is drawn tight. Kyungha winces as his grip begins to hurt. He sees that, and in a second, Kyungha can make out a whisper of an apology in his gaze, but then, it hardens again.

She hates that about him. She hates that he can control his emotions like it was something he could just manipulate at will. She could never gauge what went actually went on in his brain. It’s clear. Sehun is out of her reach, and for some pathetic, insane reason, she wanted to break through his walls.

She scoffs. What an imprudent wish. Kyungha, out of everyone, knew that he’d never truly let his guard down around her.

Because whether she wanted to admit it or not, they were more similar than she’d liked. She understood him. His base instincts. She’d never truly trust anyone. Even now, as she was getting closer to friend territory with Oh Sehun, she’d already felt enough strain.

And really, the only difference they had was on the surface. Sehun could easily adjust to his ambiance, smiling charmingly to get what he wanted or being his usual self and charming the pants off of everyone, but she’d rather wear a stoic mask on her face. It had saved her from disappointment and hurt.

Honestly, why fix something if it wasn’t broken?

Kyungha falters with her train of thoughts. So then why was she being a hypocrite? It wasn’t like Oh Sehun was a robot who needed to be fixed, but still, she had the urge to tear him apart. She’d wanted to see what was left of his remains after shattering his protective barrier. Just like he’d done to her once before.

And she’d vowed to never again let him hold power over her, but here she was, dancing on top of his palms. Kyungha had a strong feeling she’d already lost when they met again.

“You—you’re so—“ Sehun stops, eyes breaking from hers to the ceiling as he tries to form words.

Kyungha’s veins throb in her neck. The sound of blood rushing in her ears is almost deafening. “I’m so what? What’s the point in dragging me around if you aren’t sure what you want to do with me? For ’s sakes—”

On the surface, it could seem like she was referring to what he was doing literally, but Kyungha really wanted to know. Why did he keep crossing the line? Why did he keep defining their friendship if he was going to constantly step all over the line? And why the couldn’t he just leave her be?

She didn’t say any of that, and Sehun doesn’t seem to realize how much deeper her question went. Good. She wasn’t sure if she was strong enough to hear his answer anyway.

“Because you ing worry me!” He shouts, throwing his hands up.

Kyungha’s mouth twists. “Because I need it so much?” She articulates, voice laced with sarcasm. “How many times do I have to ing remind you that I’m not a child anymore? I’m not the little girl you met through Kyungsoo!”

“Don’t you think I ing know that?” He fumes, continuing to raise his voice.

“Then why do you care so much? Just leave me alone!”

His hands go limb on his sides. And Kyungha feels her lips going numb with how tightly she’s been biting them. With unsteady hands, he places them on her shoulders, barely gripping her. “Because it’s easier that way,” he laments, his voice barely above a whisper. And suddenly, he didn't resemble the confident, all-charming man she knew. She tightens her fist.

Kyungha just doesn’t understand. Why would it be easier? Was it easy for him to cause her distress? ing bastard.

She pulls away from him, which causes him to stare anywhere but at her. “Spare me your bull for once. And Sehun?” She waits for him to meet her gaze again. “Let’s just keep whatever the hell it is between us professional. I can’t—“ Her voice breaks. “—deal with your mind games.”

Then, she breaks their eye contact because Kyungha was a hundred percent sure if she saw his reaction, she wouldn’t make it out of the room with herself intact.