Jennie | Mistake

Flashback:

I'm too late. I'm too late. I'm too late.

"Please, come back," I cried out, gripping onto my chest towards the painful tightness of my shattered heart. I looked up with my blurry vision and watched helplessly. Lisa's car was disappearing from my view and all I can do was cry on the dirty street.

I'm too late. I'm too late. I'm too late.

I had the chance to confess and all I did was stare at her and watched her leave. Why did I even decide to come here and torture myself even more if I wasn't going to do anything? I had it all planned out but standing on her driveway and staring at the pain in her eyes, I froze.

"I love you," I croaked. That's all I wanted to tell her. "I love you."

Seeing the car leave my view, I new I was too late.

And after a few moments of sitting on the dirty street, I slowly pushed myself back up. Roughly wiping away the tears, I slowly turned around and focused my eyes on the house I use to visit on a daily basis. I sniffed and made my way back to the house.

With a shaky hand, I cautiously pushed the ajar door open and puffed out a breath. And, walking in, more tears slipped from my eyes from the emptiness of not only my heart but the house I'm in. My footsteps echoed as I walked deeper inside and I had to wrap my arms around myself as I began to feel cold from the strange void that suddenly surrounded me. 

The couch we always cuddled on was gone.

The wooden coffee table that we secretly carved under was gone. We carved  'Jenlisa' when we were only 11.

The tv was gone.

Picture frames were gone.

Everything was gone.

Looking towards Lisa's room, I held in a breath and slowly walked towards it with a heavy feeling. I wiped another tear and opened her cute purple door. I took in a sharp breath and placed my hand over my lips seeing everything I once loved gone.

She was gone.

Gazing around the room, I forced down a sob that so badly wanted to escape and fill the empty spaces. Every memory we shared in this room was now gone with her and I felt like I was chained to the floor with no way to escape and follow what my heart was screaming for. And, spotting a single picture that was pinned on the wall felt like a bullet to what was left in my heart. 

It was our picture.

She left it for me to keep.

I traced the picture with my finger tips and allowed soft cries to leave my trembling lips. 

"I love you," I whispered once more before taking the picture off the wall and sprinting out of the room.

And from that day, I promised myself that I will no longer follow what people wanted me to do and finally listen to my heart and desires. If I ever see Lisa again, 

I won't make the same mistakes again.

"Don't go."

I quietly groaned and tried to bury my face into the warmth. I smiled in content as I was met with the familiar fresh scent which was bringing back into my dream state till I felt the warmth moving and whimpering in pain.

"Don't leave me, no!"

I immediately opened my eyes and lifted my head, only to see Lisa's face scrunched up in pain with tears streaming down her smooth cheeks. I slid off of her and stood up from the couch, hovering over her figure in worry. I reached over and placed my hands on her shoulders to carefully shake her body awake. 

"Lisa hey, wake up." 

But, Lisa's scared face scrunched up into more pain than it already was and caused an ache to appear into my chest. She tugged her bottom lip in between her teeth and whimpered. The sight would've brought a familiar throb to arise in my —well you know— but Lisa's cries kept me in reality. I slid my hands up and placed them on her cheeks, wiping away the stray tears.

"Lisa baby, wake up," I begged, gently tapping her wet cheeks. Suddenly, seeing her fluttering her red eyes open and meeting mine, relief instantly waved through me. I blewout a breath and content,

"You scared me," I whispered. I continued to rub soothing circles against her pale skin. Lisa stared up at me with a look that sent my fluttering heart up into sky. It was so soft, but yet, something laid just right next to that gentle look. But I didn't know what it was. She smiled a smile that didn't reach her big doe eyes for a mere second when suddenly recognition swam in her eyes which turned her smile into a worried frown.

"Jennie, what's the date today?" She asked. I knitted my eyebrows together and replied reluctantly despite the need to ask her questions.

"January 3, why?" I asked. And in that moment, I instantly wished I never replied. Lisa's eyes had widened and she abruptly but carefully removed my hands from her cheeks and sat up. 

"I-I need to go," she stammered, refusing to meet my eyes as she knelt down and began to put on her shoes. I stared at her in worry,

"Go? Lisa, this is your house if anyone should leave it should be me."