FAMILY ARRANGEMENTS ARE HARD TO WORK OUT. Especially for a couple that has long been broken up. Eventually though, Soojung and Jongin come to the conclusion that they’d take Eunhee alternately each week. 

(Because Jongin doesn’t want to see his child only during weekends, and neither does Soojung. It’s the best alternative they’ve come up with so far.)

This week, it’s Jongin’s turn to be with Eunhee. While Soojung had reservations about the arrangement in Jongin’s house, Eunhee is more than willing to cooperate, and Eunhee’s enthusiasm is more than enough for Soojung to agree with and let her daughter go. 

Due to the change in Eunhee’s living arrangements, Jongin decides that he’ll sleep on the couch and give his bedroom to Eunhee for the time being as he doesn’t have the time to buy himself a new mattress yet. Soojung would have insisted that she take Eunhee while he doesn’t have a new mattress yet, but she decides to just keep shut and stop depriving Jongin of time with his daughter. 

The aforementioned events are what led Soojung to hanging out in Taemin’s apartment right after work. 

“You are pathetic, Soojung.” Taemin laughs as he bounces a stress ball from the wall back to his hands. 

It takes all of Soojung’s energy to not glare at him as he decides that laughing at her is the best way to confront Soojung’s new problem: not knowing what to do with her personal life. Now that Jongin is in the picture and he’s making sure that he makes up for all of the time that he hasn’t spent together with Eunhee, there’s enough time for Soojung to think of herself now. 

So far, it’s not really going too well. Had Taemin not been around the company at all, Soojung would have tried to pick up Eunhee from dance class only to realize that it’s a Jongin day for the child. For Soojung, everything is a clockwork routine that does not really change at all. It takes an arrival from Jongin for her to realize that routines can be changed. 

“Seriously, there are so many people who would kill to be your friend but—” Taemin’s phone rings while he’s in the middle of his speech. He brings out his ringing phone only to decline the call seconds after reading the caller ID. “going back… well a lot of people would want to be your friend but you don’t want to make friends with anyone else!” 

“Shut up. Also, who was that? Why didn’t you take it?” She doesn’t really have a reason to ask other than the fact that she’s just incredibly nosy. 

“Seulgi. She’s been bothering me non-stop about this new film that she wants to go see. I’m not in the mood for it, though.” He shrugs, like being asked by the one and only Kang Seulgi is not a big deal at all to him. 

Soojung throws a crumpled piece of paper at the back of his head.  “You idiot! She’s probably asking you out and you go ahead and decline her calls like that?” 

“Seulgi and I are just friends ,” the amount of emphasis on the word ‘friends’ makes Soojung flinch, “so that means I’m not obligated to answer all of her calls, nor go out with her when she asks me to.” 

There’s no reason for Soojung not to believe him. She’s known Taemin for years and she knows it by heart when he’s serious about something. What baffles her though is how desperate he sounds as he tells her that he and Seulgi are just friends. She wouldn’t hold it against him if they weren’t, nor would she actually mind. 

“Alright, weirdo. You didn’t have to deny it so bad, I might start to think that you’re actually going on a date with her if you tried harder.” She says, mostly just to spite Taemin but then again he’s gone awfully quiet now. It’s almost like Soojung is not inside the house. 

The way Taemin thinks is not something Soojung has memorized over the years. He’s unpredictable, and sometimes there are things that he bottles up to himself - sparing Soojung from the privilege of knowing what he’s thinking about. It annoys her, and maybe makes her feel a bit stupid that she would always let Taemin in, allowing him to know what she’s feeling or just how bad it’s affecting her while ahe doesn’t tell her . 

Unfair, she thinks. Because there’s absolutely no way that this friendship worked throughout all those years with only Soojung sharing the actual raw parts of herself with him. Sure there are times when Taemin would open up about his insecurities, but she could count those in one hand. 

But because Soojung is not the type to hold anything against a person, she doesn’t mention anything to Taemin. It must be hard for him, anyway. If it takes Soojung days and days of overthinking before she actually tells him anything, then it must be harder for him. After all, Taemin and her share the same habits. An effect of spending years and years of being friends with each other. 

“You could tell me things you know.” Soojung speaks up after a while because the silence is killing her and she’s not used to spending her time with Taemin in absolute silence. 

“Even if they’re the things that make you feel… bad, or ugly. I’m your friend, Taemin, and I’ll always be here to listen to anything you want me to know.” She adds, keeping her gaze on Taemin and knowing that he’s listening. 

Soon enough, he turns to face her. “I know, Jungie.” 

He approaches her with a small smile on his face, and it doesn’t faze Soojung at all when he wraps his arms around her. 

There are only a few luxuries of life that she could have for free, and one of those is being on the receiving end of Lee Taemin’s embraces. It takes Soojung back to all the years she’d gone through with a weak mind and an even weaker heart. Throughout all those years, there’s Taemin. 

“Now tell me what’s wrong.” Soojung tries to prod him by making her voice sound extra convincing. The kind of voice she used before on Sooyeon during the time where her older sister decided to shut herself inside the office for an entire day. 

“Change. That’s what’s wrong.” 

She waits for a few more seconds to listen to any afterthoughts, but sadly none came. All she could feel is the steady beating of Taemin’s heart against her chest, and the rise and fall of his breathing. 

“I know it’s hard, but sometimes we just have to push through it.” She runs her fingers through his hair until he pulls away. Soojung could only give him an encouraging smile, in fear that anything she could say would affect him differently from how she intended. 

“Changes that involve just me are easy to push through, but everything’s changing around me and suddenly I feel like I’m pushed back into a corner.” He breathes out his last few words, looking at the ground as he distances himself from Soojung. 

Soojung had been so engrossed in her own life and her issues with change that she’d forgotten how to be a good friend to Taemin. Tears form in her eyes, but Soojung forces them to stop. She can’t cry right now, can’t take this moment away from Taemin because she is not the selfish teenager she once was. 

It’s only now that Soojung notices just how much he’d moved away from her. As if she’s on autopilot, she closes the remaining distance between her and Taemin. This time, it’s her who hugs him first. Her arms circling around him, making sure his head falls on her shoulder. 

This is normal. Soojung thinks. He’s been beside her for as long as she could remember, and there had been no reservations when it comes to Taemin. Despite the sheer amount of people complaining about their skinship, it’s never been an issue for both of them. Touch is comfort in their own little way. A gentle nudge of the elbow, a small poke at the side, a short hug, or a slight squeeze of the hand. To Soojung and Taemin, it’s nothing out of the ordinary. They’ve been friends for as long as she could remember, they already have their own language between the two of them that’s ingrained within the depths of their brain. 

Just as Soojung had expected, Taemin returns the hug, burying his face into her neck. 

“Look, I have no idea about what you’re going through or the magnitude of it all, but I can promise you that I’ll be here with you. Just like how you’ve been there for me throughout everything.” She tells him as she listens to his breathing. 

Maybe finding a personal hobby of her own, or what to do with her time without Eunhee isn’t the biggest agenda of the day anymore. 

Or maybe it is. Now that Soojung and Jongin have finally worked out the current situation at hand, then maybe she’ll already have enough time in her hands to actually work out her relationships with other people. Become a better friend, or a sister, or a daughter. 

While she didn’t exactly burn bridges with anyone, she does a bad job at maintaining relationships. The only reason why she’s gotten this far along her friendship with Taemin is because he’s the one who comes into her house every time he can to annoy the hell out of her. If he didn’t, Soojung assumes that their friendship would be on the verge of crumbling down. 

As for the rest of her friends, their messages are all either left on read, or unread at all. 

A few more seconds pass by before Taemin pulls away again and smiles. Finally, Soojung feels relief flood through her system. 

“Thanks, Jungie.” 

“You’re welcome.” 

“But we still need to find you a hobby…” 

She throws a pillow straight to Taemin’s face.