Reminder for all of you, not to lose hope!

27.

“You should eat something.”

I shake my head off and push away Chanyeol’s hand that offers food right in front of my mouth. “I really couldn’t.” My head turns away from him, and directly gazes to closed door that I have been staring since last night. It has been almost 20 hours since Baekhyun was awake, and I am missing his face right at this moment. Again, the hot liquid brims in my eyes, making my vision blurry before it falls down to roll on my cheeks.

My heart is aching. I really shouldn’t fell asleep last night. Maybe with that, I could realize his condition earlier.

And I am truly sorry for both of the twins, I should have not cry in front of them earlier. Now Hyun Joo and Hyun Joon are sleeping in Minseok’s office since both of them are worn out from accompanying me here all day long. They insisted to stay, especially when we are not allowed to enter Baekhyun’s room yet. We only succeed to persuade them having some rest after I pleaded a few times; though it was very hard since they wanted me to join them too.

I could only give them my white lies saying, “Mommy will come later, okay?”

“Spare some mercy for yourself…for your baby…,” Chanyeol breathes, then hands the bread over again, still persistent to feed me something. “Hm?”

The tears drop again yet slowly, I reach for the bun and milk, only take one bite and a sip of it before putting them aside. Everything feels tasteless, I hardly munch that small piece of bread and it feels as if my throat is about to reject everything that enters. I keep looking away from the man who sits by my side, concern as he silently watches my every moves. I don’t want to show him this face, I despise the fact that Chanyeol had only see me on my weakest days. Even from five years ago until now.

“You know…? My shoulders are for you to lean on. For real.”

My silence is enough to answer everything. It is not that I’m refusing Chanyeol’s generous thoughts as a friend however I couldn’t bring myself to get any other kind of comforts anymore. The only thing that I crave right now is Baekhyun’s smile. My head keeps imagining he’s getting healthier, alive and kicking just as he pleased, just like he should. “Only hearing his voice is more than enough right now…,” I mumbled subconsciously before curling myself and sob, again and again.

“Oh dear…” The man immediately wraps his huge arms around me and softly pats. He tries to calm me down but there’s never one second did I stop weeping.

Continuously, those hot tears streams down my face. “Why is it so hard for us to be happy? We were just…” My finger graze on the ring around my finger. “…it’s not even a month yet. Our k-kids are s-still…very young and I haven’t tell h-him yet…” My hand trails on the flat belly, the bump that haven’t appear yet. It is getting harder for me to pronounce each of the words due to the sobbing that would not stop anytime soon. “I r-really need him, Chanyeol. I really need Baek…”

The man keeps on caressing my back, staying quiet as he listens to my hardly-understandable mumble. I feel sorry about everything – that I was being selfish at the moment, that I couldn’t care about anything else but Baekhyun, that I am crying so hard which might affect my pregnancy, that I failed to hide it in front of my kids and for that one lady whose steps were halt as soon as she sees me in her boyfriend’s embrace.

Ye Eun stares at both of her feet, somehow her steps bring her backwards at the moment she witnesses Chanyeol hugging that lady at the very place. Instead of feeling heartbroken, the former feels like she could see everything crystal clear now. Finally, she could hold firm with her own assumption as for she is sure that everything was right. That his boyfriend’s heart is not hers anymore, perhaps even, never was.

All this time, Ye Eun hesitates – she doubts here and there, the feeling with Chanyeol in the far past is not the same as it is now. That guy was never there in their conversation, barely present in any decision. Without Ye Eun even realizes, her heart has already accepted that fact which explains the smile that curls through her lips despite getting caught in the situation.

However her march backwards has been stopped immediately as she bumped into someone, who is none other than Minseok. That doctor smiles, but right after seeing the expression on Ye Eun’s face, his eyes was fast to get a peek of his fiancée’s sight just now before holding her shoulders and helps her walking away from that place.

Minseok does not need any explanation, he is already quick enough to catch on everything that happened. That man never asks of how Ye Eun ends up to be here, how did she came with CEO Park or why was she acting like that a few moments ago. With a quick glance, the former have already read everything that is going on – that Ye Eun and the young CEO might have some kind of relationship between them however it turns out that their love is not mutual, since CEO Park had his eyes on somebody else who could never be his in any way possible.

“You’re surprisingly calm…?”

The lady shrugs, tucking her hair behind the ears as she leans against the wall behind her. Ye Eun steals a glance at the doctor’s confused face and could not help but to give a thin smile to answer it. “I was quick to foresee it. Guess I’ll just…give up?”

Minseok gets caught off guard. He finds himself being insensitive for asking that kind of question at this time thus he is quick to apologize, “I’m sorry…”

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