My heart hammered loudly in my ears, drowning out the noise of the cars and the chatters of the people passing by. All my senses were focused on the person at the other end of the phone call; I didn’t even realize I was holding my breath while I waited for her to speak.

“Yes, it’s me,” she finally said and I was able to breathe again, “how are you, Wheein-ah?”

I stared at my feet, words upon words of bitterness, anger, surprised and relief crashing through my brain. Every thought I ever had, every conjecture I had ever come up with about what happened to her, seemed to disappear that a split second, leaving my mind empty. I just stood there, my mouth getting dry as I pondered on what exactly I should answer her with.

“I’m fine,” I managed to choke out, “how are you?”

“I’ve been better,” she sighed and I could hear the exhaustion in her voice, “I was actually out on a walk, trying to clear my head, when I saw you walking out of a pub. That woman, um, she’s your girlfriend, right?”

To be honest, since it was only our first date, Irene and I hadn’t talked about what we are to each other just yet. But I didn’t see any reason for Byul to know all the details about my love life, so I said nothing.

“Ah I see,” Byul chuckled softly and my guts started twisting for no apparent reason, “it’s none of my business. I understand. Um, I’m sorry if this call came out of the blue, but I thought I should at least say hi since I’m in the neighbourhood.”

I started looking around, wondering if Byul was still nearby. From what she said, I had a feeling that she was.

“Where are you?”

“Just across the street.”

My head swiveled in the direction she mentioned and there she was, a lanky figure in the dark, illuminated only by the light from the lamp post she was leaning against. She caught my eye and smiled a little, her free hand waving slightly at me.

I wasn’t exactly amused that she was right there in front me and yet she chose to talk to me over the phone instead of coming to face me in person.

“Why aren’t you coming over here and say hi like a regular person?” I asked coldly, but the quiver in my voice gave away my true feelings.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Wheein-ah…”

I hated to admit it, but she was right. I still wanted to at least give her a good smack, to express the torment I had felt after one whole year without word or news from her; I honestly just wanted closure.

“How did you know I’m here?” I asked, hoping against hope that the reason Byul finally appeared in front of me was because she had been looking for me.

“I didn’t. I’m actually here for work. Not stalking you. I promise.”

“I see…”

I couldn’t hide the disappointment in my voice and Byul must have noticed it because she started to say soothing words to me, but I quickly cut her off.

“How did you get my number?”

“Um, from Miss Hwang, your ex-boss.”

My heart skipped a beat. “You…met with Fany-unnie?”

“Yeah. I went there to look for you, but you weren’t there anymore.”

“I see…”

I made a mental note to ask Tiffany about this later.

“Please don’t be too upset with Miss Hwang,” Byul suddenly said, as if she had read my thoughts, “I think she only gave me your number so that I would stop showing up at the office and pester her about you.”

The idea of Byul pestering Tiffany about me was too funny and I found myself grinning down at my feet. I quickly caught myself and cleared my throat before asking, “Why were you looking for me?”

“I just wanted to apologize and explain what happened on that night one year ago.”

Just remembering that memory soured my mood almost instantly; I was still bitter that Byul left me with an empty promise and no goodbye. But now that she was in front of me, I suddenly had the urge to hear her side of the story.

“Explain then.”

“What? Right now?”

“Yeah. Since we’re talking about it, why not?”

“Okay…” Byul glanced at her wristwatch and then looked at me with a crooked smile, “…but let’s talk on the way. You’re going home, right? I’ll accompany you. It’s getting late and I’m not comfortable letting you walk home alone.”

I glanced at the screen of my phone and Byul was right; it was almost 11:00 pm. I was supposed to be home already and in bed; I still have work tomorrow.

“Technically, I am walking home alone,” I took a jab at our obvious distance as I started walking in the direction of my apartment, “unless you want to cross the street and change that…”

Byul chuckled in my ear. “That would be nice, but I think the distance is good for us.”

“Oh? Why is that?”

“I think you know why…”

My face warmed involuntarily at the thought of what might happened if we did close the distance between us.

Yup. Distance is good. In fact, it’s perfect. Yup, yup.

“Okay,” I sighed, trying not to sound too disappointed, “explanation time. Go.”

“So, um, I left that night to meet with Aoi,” Byul let out a heavy sigh as she started to reminisce, “I swear to you that I intended to come back as soon as I talked to her, but things just spiraled out of control and, well, the rest is history.”

The image of the dead girl in the cemetery suddenly flashed through my head. “So the girl in the cemetery…”

“You saw that?!”

The sharp tone in Byul’s voice startled me. I stopped in my tracks and looked across the street at her; Byul had stopped too and was looking at me intensely.

“Yeah, I did,” I affirmed, curious about her sudden outburst, “I was looking for you and there was a crowd at the cemetery, so I thought…”

“I’m sorry you had to see that, Wheein-ah,” Byul muttered, rubbing her face with her free hand, “I wished I could have buried her properly, but my father saw to it that I couldn’t. He made me a prisoner at home instead.”

“What do you mean?”

“I wasn’t allowed to leave the house at all,” Byul said bitterly,“if that is not the meaning of imprisonment, then I don’t know what is. But at least in that time I was able to work on my stutter. That’s the only positive thing I got out of it all.”

“I see…”

“After agreeing to take over the company,” Byul continued, “my father finally allowed me a little bit of freedom. I took that chance and looked for you, Wheein-ah, but, well, you already left.”

There was something nagging at me; something that Byul hadn’t touched yet. “So, um, was the girl in the cemetery Aoi?”

“Yes,” I could hear the pain and sadness in Byul’s voice, “it was Aoi.”

“I’m sorry, Byul-ah…”

“Yeah...”

We fell silent, neither of us knew what to say to the other. I started walking again and when I glanced over at her, Byul was walking along with me. We stayed like that for a while until Byul spoke.

“I haven’t told you, did I?”

I frowned. “Told me what?”

“You look really good tonight.”

I blushed at the sudden compliment. “Wh-what?”

“Your outfit and your hair. It looks good on you.”

I ran my hand through my short blonde hair, feeling a little self-conscious and shy. I wasn’t wearing anything particularly glamorous – I had put on some light makeup and wore dark grey blazer and pants, paired with a plain black tee, a silver necklace and a pair of white sneakers; I remembered thinking that I did a good job complementing Irene’s black-and-grey dress that she wore for tonight’s date.

The date. Irene. .

In my own humble opinion, my first date with Irene was very successful. But then, I started talking to Byul, the woman I hadn’t seen or talked to in a year, the one I was supposed to be moving on from, and I had almost forgotten about Irene in the process.

I’m the worst excuse for a human being. I’m so sorry, Irene.

Fortunately, we were nearing my apartment building and I had a good reason to cut our conversation short.

“Thanks for the compliment,” I said hastily as I stopped at the entrance of the building and gazed across the street at Byul, “but I have to go now.”

“Yeah, okay. I understand.”

For the second time since we started talking, we fell silent again. It seemed like neither of us knew how to end this conversation without leaving a feeling of awkwardness behind.

Suddenly, I felt sadness creeping into my heart. I realized that this would probably be the last time I will see Byul or hear her voice.

“This is the last time, isn’t it,” I murmured, “that we would see each other?”

“Yeah,” Byul’s voice was soft and warm and I was certain she had the same smile on her face, “think of this as the goodbye we never had a chance to say before.”

Tears started to spring up to my eyes. “Yeah…”

“I can see how happy that woman make you and I am genuinely happy for you, Wheein-ah.”

“Yeah…”

My voice came out muffled; I had to put a hand over my mouth to stop myself from sobbing out loud.

This was it. The goodbye that I had been yearning for all this time.

I just wish we can have one last hug before we go our own ways, Byul-ah…

As if she had heard my heart’s wish, Byul suddenly dashed across the street towards me and pulled me into her embrace.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered into my hair as she tightened her arms around me, “I know what I said about distance, but I can’t just leave without giving you a goodbye hug.”

The tears that I had been holding back poured down my face like a waterfall. I clung tightly to Byul and buried my face into her shoulder, not caring that I was soaking her shirt with my tears.

For what seemed like a long time, we stood there, arms wrapped tightly around each other. We didn’t care who was watching – we were too lost in the sensation of just being in each other’s arms after so long.

Byul was the first one to step back from the embrace.

“Okay, I think that’s long enough,” she said, trying to hide her sniffles but failing, “I can’t show up to work tomorrow with puffed up eyes.”

I let out an amused snort. “I’m in the same boat, you know,” I pointed out as I wiped my eyes and nose with the back of my hands, “and it’s all your fault.”

Byul threw her head back and laughed. It was an infectious laugh and I found myself giggling along with her. When we were finally calm again, we looked at each other with smiles on our faces. I was still feeling a little sad, but much lighter than before our conversation started.

“It really is good to see you again, Jung Wheein,” Byul said softly as she reached out to tuck a stray lock of pale hair behind my ear, “to be honest, I don’t really want to say goodbye…”

I understood her feelings and, to be honest, I felt the same way, but I doubt that either of us knew what would be in store for us in the future. Maybe we will meet again, but I was certain in my heart that right now is the time for us to part ways.

“We have to,” I smiled, hoping to assure her that, somehow, everything will be alright again, “it’s the goodbye we didn’t get to say before, remember? We need to at least get this out of the way.”

Maybe in the future we will meet again.

I swallowed the last words; I didn’t want to get Byul’s hope up and mine as well.

Byul looked hesitant for a moment. “Um, I’ll be in town for the next three months so…maybe we’ll see each other then?”

I chuckled. “This is supposed to be goodbye, Byul. We’re not supposed to make promises of meeting up.”

“Right, right. Of course.”

Byul looked visibly crestfallen that I had to add, “Let’s leave our next meeting up to fate, okay?”

A smile bloomed on Byul’s face; that same crooked smile I used to adore in the past.

“Okay,” she said softly, “I guess this is goodbye then.”

I bit my lower lip and nodded silently, not trusting myself to speak without bawling my eyes out again.

Byul sighed and reached out to caress the side of my face. “Goodbye, Jung Wheein,” she whispered, “I hope fate will be kind and let us meet again soon.”

I forced myself to smile at Byul and she returned my smile as she walked backwards away from me, as if she was still reluctant to turn around and leave me.

So I did what was best for the both of us.

I turned away from Byul and dashed into my apartment building.

As soon as I entered the elevator, a fresh bout of tears started streaming down my face. I was glad that I had the compartment all to myself, giving me time to grieve and let everything out before I reach my apartment.

That night was the last time that I saw Byul.

…or at least that was what I thought.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A/N: I don't know why, but I'm so nervous about this update ^^;

Please let me know what you think in the comments. Thank you for reading! ^_^