A/N : Soooooo everyone… it’s kind of rare for me to post mid-week but this should be the pace of updating, no? :) Anyways, this chapter happened around one month after the last one and the one before the first chapter. Yoseob had settled everything and was about to go to Paris tomorrow and Doojoon’s engagement was happening tomorrow as well. What a coincidence, huh? LOL well Yoseob just refused to attend so yeah… This chapter is really long and angsty and I L.O.V.E Junhyung here. I love that man to no end here and I will always love him. Ugh Junhyung, what would I be writing without you here. This is probably the longest chapter I have ever written. Anyways, enjoy your read and leave me comments on how Junhyung is so awesome and Doojoon needs some kicking and Yoseob deserves some tender loving care. Lol, no… I’m just messing with ya’ll but nice comments will be nice <3

25 years old, I love you.

“Have you told him?”

Yoseob sipped his iced chocolate and winced at the question. He stared at Junhyung and shook his head softly. Junhyung sighed in exasperation before started nagging, “Yoseobah, you need to tell him. I mean he is your best friend and he needs to know, okay? Last week you told me you were going to tell him. What happened to that? You have been delaying this for way too long.”

Yoseob’s gaze fell to the floor of the café and Junhyung toned down his voice a little softer, “Yoseobah, you need to tell him, okay? Hmmm? You are going to Paris tomorrow, for goodness sake. When are you going to break the news? When you are already in Paris?”

The young photographer was silent before he replied softly, “… maybe. It’d be much easier that way…”

Junhyung breathed out his frustration and slouched back in his seat, “The poor guy still thinks you are going to his engagement announcement or party or event or anything you want to call it tomorrow. I overheard him asking the organizer for a free flow of iced chocolate in case ‘Yoseobie wants it’. Don’t do this to him, don’t you think this is too cruel? Too cruel for him and for you? What will happen when you are not present tomorrow and he knows nothing about it? At least spare him the worry on his important day.”

Upon hearing the words ‘important day’, Yoseob flinched and his eyes twitched. He replied softly, “If I tell him today, I will lose him today. If I tell him tomorrow and go missing afterwards, at least I will have him as my best friend until tomorrow. Don’t you think so, Junhyungah?”

Junhyung growled at the answer, “Don’t be so ing selfish. You both are so ing selfish and I’ve had ing enough of this . Do whatever you want, okay Yoseobah? I will still love you afterwards whatever you have done today or tomorrow. But please, just think of him, of you two. Everything that you two have been through, is it worth it to just end it like this?”

Yoseob loved Junhyung, he really did. The business man was his pillar of support after Doojoon became his source of heartaches and sorrow. Junhyung had always had Yoseob’s best interests in mind, and the younger man knew. He knew and no matter how much Yoseob was deluding himself, he knew, he understood that Junhyung was right. Junhyung was always right, and this was why he was such a powerful player in the business field from such an early age. 

He needed to tell Doojoon, Yoseob understood that, he knew that. And it frustrated Junhyung to no end when Yoseob kept dragging the news from Doojoon, and honestly it killed him too. Every time Doojoon called him or talked to him, the news almost slipped out of his pretty mouth. Almost, but it never did because Yoseob was careful.

The past month had been really hard on Yoseob. There were unexpectedly so many things to take care of, administration was a and he was forced to travel back and forth a lot of institutions to verify his confirmation and get all the papers available for him in Paris. He had to take French and English classes in between his hectic schedule – although it was an international institution with international teaching forces who spoke international languages, yet Yoseob needed to at least know what he was getting for his meals (not buying escargot because it sounded nice) and how to order food in French.

And everything was done under wraps, without any speck of Doojoon’s knowledge. It was hard getting everything hidden from him, but Yoseob could not bring himself to break the news, not yet at least. He was a coward, a loser with a sorry , and he realized this far before Junhyung had bluntly called him the exact same things one month ago. He was going to tell Doojoon today. He must tell him today.

Yoseob shook his head and smiled, “No it’s never worth it. You are right, I’m telling him today. I promise.” Junhyung furrowed his eyebrows in obvious worry, “You are not doing this for me, Yoseobah. You are doing this for Doojoon and yourself, and your friendship or whatever it has morphed into.”

Yoseob’s smile got wider and his eyes softened, “I know, Junhyungah. I know.”

A soft click was heard and the door swung open slowly as Doojoon led himself into Yoseob’s apartment. The apartment was dimmed, with only a few soft yellow lights casting its glow in the whole place, the sky was dark that night, cloudy with no sign of the moon and its light. Doojoon walked quietly to the living room to find Yoseob sitting beside the big window glass, gazing blankly outside. It was fairly dark and the older man could not gauge the expression on Yoseob’s face.

“Yoseobie?” Doojoon called Yoseob softly as to not startle the photographer and he stealthily took a seat beside Yoseob.

“Are you okay? You didn’t sound so well on the phone when you asked me to come over. Are you ill? Let me check on you, here…” Doojoon placed his palms on Yoseob’s forehead and his own to check if Yoseob had indeed developed a fever.

Yoseob smiled at the gesture and softly grabbing Doojoon’s hand away from his forehead. He would miss this, the attention, the worry, he would miss every single thing about Doojoon. “No, Doojoonah, I’m okay, really. I’m not sick or anything. I just need to talk to you.”

“Are you sure? Because it does feel a bit warm up there.” Doojoon frowned as he tried to feel Yoseob’s forehead once more just to be sure. But before the older man managed to do it, Yoseob snatched his hand away and put it on his lap. “I need to talk, Doojoonah.”

“Okay…” Doojoon sounded confused, “… you are scaring me right now.”

Yoseob stared deep into Doojoon’s eyes and started talking, “First off, I’m so sorry Doojoonah. I’m so so sorry…”

“What are you sorry for?”

“I’m so sorry because I cannot attend your engagement party tomorrow. I’m very sor – “

“What!” Shock was obviously evident in Doojoon’s voice, not so much anger or irritation, but pure shock. “Why? I mean – why – you never –“

“I am going to Paris tomorrow morning for my scholarship. I am so sorry for not being there with you – “
 

“What scholarship? You have never mentioned anything about it before, what are you talking about, Yoseobah? Is this some sick joke or something?” Doojoon knitted his eyebrows together, eyes hopeful, slightly laughing, thinking it was just a big bad joke from Yoseob.

Yoseob sighed and started explaining carefully to a flabbergasted Doojoon, “I received a privilege in a form of a scholarship from an institution in Paris. A board member in Korea Tourism Board recommended me and the institution agreed immediately. It’s going to be a three-year full course in Paris. It’s a privilege that almost every photographer will never dream off and I cannot let this excellent opportunity pass… and I’m leaving tomorrow…”

Doojoon stuttered as a million questions started swirling in his brain, “But how can – what about your papers? What about the language? Accommodation? Uh, administration ? Don’t you need to prepare for those? How can you go tomorrow?”

Yoseob turned his head away and torn his gaze from Doojoon to focus on a spot on the floor, “Everything has been settled. I have been arranging everything since I received the offer a month and a half ago.”

“A month and a half ago? So you have been lying to me all of this while?”

Yoseob winced at the question, he knew this was coming. He let out a shaky breath and continued, “Yes and that is why I’m so sorry. I lied to you and I am so sorry. I wish it had been easier for me so I can tell you much much earlier. I am so sorry, I understand if you hate me and want to stop being – “

“Who else knows?” Doojoon’s voice was hard and cold, it felt like a sharp iceberg stabbing Yoseob’s heart, “Who knew about this when I didn’t?”

Yoseob swallowed bitterly as he said, “My family… and Junhyung.”

“Junhyung…” Doojoon laughed bitterly, “So Junhyung knew while I didn’t? Well, he knows everything about you, doesn’t he? Is he your new best friend now?” A bitter anger was apparent and Yoseob was hurt by the accusation.

He whimpered, “No! You are my best friend, you always are and always will. I’m sorry, Doojoonah. I’m so sorry…”

Doojoon fisted his hands until his knuckled turned white as he stood up and walked briskly to the door, “Junhyung that bastard… I’ll ing kill him.”

Yoseob pleas and cries of ‘no’ and ‘don’t’ fell on deaf ears, Doojoon yanked and shrugged him off when the younger man tried to retain him from going, begging the older man to listen to him.

Doojoon could not think anymore. His mind was fogged by the painful sensation in his heart. He did not know what was right and wrong anymore. All he knew was that he needed to punch a bile out of Junhyung’s stomach at the ing moment.

The obnoxious and loud banging on his door irritated Junhyung to no end. Who was rude enough to incessantly disturb his peace in the dead of the night? He groaned and pressed the monitor beside his door, and was not shocked at all to see a furious Doojoon on the screen. He had expected this.

Junhyung was offensively pushed back immediately when the door was opened, Doojoon was seeing red as he swore loudly at the business man, “What the – “

“So he has finally told you?” Junhyung’s voice was calm and controlled.

Doojoon hated the man in front of him with a passion, he was furious at the fact that Junhyung knew, and he and Yoseob were teaming against him, keeping a secret from him. Doojoon felt like a fool.

“Shut the up.” Doojoon punched Junhyung square at his jaw and gave another hard blow on his left cheek. “You take Yoseob away from me.”

Junhyung staggered backwards from two powerful blows and felt metallic taste of blood seeping out to his tongue as the soft inside of his cheek was torn. He chuckled lightly and spat out the blood, “You have no right to claim him. You don’t even deserve a strand of his hair when you are so blinded by your own little selfish friendship with Yoseob.”

Doojoon stood frozen on the spot, horror in his eyes as Junhyung continued, “You never noticed the hurt in his eyes, the fall at the corner his lips when he smiled, the emptiness in his orbs, the way he had been spacing out so much the last few years. You had no ing idea what he had been through alone. You were not there.”

Junhyung spat another batch of fresh blood from his mouth, “Do you remember when he went to Tibet? Did you think he went there for a vacation? To have fun and take pictures?” Junhyung scoffed, “He was there to cleanse his soul, to erase his love for you, to get rid of any affection he had for you. Because he was disgusted with himself, he was scared of losing you, scared of not having you by his side anymore. And remember the time you kissed him?” Junhyung chuckled this time around, bitter and full of loathing, “Man, you ruined him that night when you ran away from him. He was a sobbing wreck in my bathroom, thinking how he had disgusted you, thinking you would never want him anymore. It was sick, man. And I was there with him, watching as waves and waves of sadness washed him over and over again. I was there holding him, pacifying him. And where were you? Hiding behind your little coward . What a joke.”

“I – I…” Doojoon stuttered as his mouth gaped open. He had never known about any of this, Yoseob had never told him any of this. This was all new, the truth hurt and Doojoon should just kill himself at the moment. There was a sick pain swirling in his stomach, creeping onto his chest and spreading out to his spine. It hurt like nothing he had experienced before. It hurt and Doojoon wanted to die.

“And then you just waltzed your way back into Yoseob’s life and told him you were getting engaged.” Junhyung smirked at the horror in Doojoon’s face and he clapped sarcastically, “Bravo, man. Bravo. What an excellent ending for the both of you.”

Every clap that bounced off the walls felt like a raw slap to Doojoon’s cheeks. He was not even aware of the whispers coming out of his mouth, “… but Yoseob said it was a privilege…”

Junhyung laughed menacingly, “Yeah? You think so? The scholarship offer came ten days before you announced your engagement to Yoseob and it was chucked at one of the clutters in Yoseob’s apartment. He was not even thinking of accepting it. The thought of leaving you was too frightening, too foreign. But you were the one leaving him with your fickle mind. Just because you didn’t want to humiliate your girlfriend, you ing threw away the most precious person in your life.” Junhyung snorted at the horrified man, “You are a ing joke, Doojoonah. You deserve nothing. You are the bastard.”

“But aren’t you and Yoseob…?”

“What? Lovers? Boyfriends? If you are even aware at the slightest things around you that are not about you, then maybe you would know that I have been going out with Hyunseung for a few years. You are ing jealous and yet you will never admit to it. You are too wrapped up in your little flawless life with Yoseob constantly attaching himself to you, being by your side. You have no ing idea what is going on other than your own ing selfish life. You took him for granted.”

Doojoon took a few steps back, blown away by the truth, the fact he never knew. He widened his eyes in dreadfulness and whispered, “Oh… my… God… Oh my goodness. I –“ Junhyung could see the horror in Doojoon’s face faded instantly, and he was highly amused when he saw relief washed over the older man’s face as soon as realization dawned on him. It was as if all of these truths were exactly what Doojoon had been hoping to hear, had been longing to know, had been wishing they were real.

Junhyung steadily walked to him and patted Doojoon shoulder, “Go to Yoseob now, mend things. You can still do it. It might seem impossible, but Yoseob is blinded by love for you. He would understand. Go, Doojoonah. Go and claim your rights. Make yourself deserving of Yoseob.”

Processing Junhyung’s words slowly, Doojoon nodded slowly and made his way out before he turned around, “I’m sorry Junhyungah for the, yeah, violence. I was just…”

Junhyung chuckled sincerely, “It’s okay, now go. Call me if you need anything.”

Doojoon nodded numbly and sprinted to get to his car and raced back to Yoseob’s apartment.

When Doojoon was back the second time that night in Yoseob’s apartment, he found the younger man curled up on the sofa, hugging his knees tightly onto his chest, soft sobs were ear splittingly loud. Doojoon frowned upon the scene in front of him, his chest hurt, his heart hurt, his love hurt, every single fiber in his body hurt, a yearning for Yoseob.

“Yoseobah…” It was a mere whisper but Yoseob jumped at the mention of his name. Quickly sitting up and turning his head to see the source of voice he knew too well. None of them moved, all they could hear was the labour of their breaths and the drumming of their hearts.

“Yoseobah… I’m sorry.”

There was no reply from Yoseob, the younger widened his eyes in horror, waiting for the verdict to flow from Doojoon’s mouth.

“Yoseobah… don’t go. Stay with me forever. Don’t leave me ever again.”

And then Yoseob convulsed into a million sobs on the sofa in front of Doojoon. The older man rushed over to him and held the younger man’s shaking body tightly in his embrace. Yoseob was howling, he was screaming, he was growling, he was sobbing, he was bawling, and Doojoon held him tight through all these. Doojoon held Yoseob close to his heart, whispering soothing words and sweet nothings.  

“Don’t’ go, please don’t go. Don’t leave me. I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Junhyung told me everything and I’m sorry. I was stupid and selfish and I hurt you. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for hurting you, for taking you for granted. You are so precious, oh god, you are the most precious thing that ever happened to me. Don’t leave me, don’t leave me.” Yoseob clung onto Doojoon desperately as the older man rambled on his confession and tightened his embrace and rained Yoseob with kisses on every patch of skin he could find.

“I love you, Yoseobah. I always have since the first day when we were eight, if I were just brave enough. I’m a coward and I hurt you for being a ing coward. I love you, I love you…”

Doojoon whispered into Yoseob’s ear.

“… I love you, I love you, I love you…” It was a mantra Doojoon casted on Yoseob. A love mantra to make Yoseob his forever.

In the middle of frantic need of touch and skin and love and desire and passion and new realization, Doojoon released Yoseob from his embraced and claimed the younger lips with his own. Yoseob’s lips were salty with tears but they were so sweet, the sweetest nectar Doojoon had ever tasted, they were wet but so were his lips and their tongues. Yoseob whimpered under the assault of Doojoon’s tongue on his, accepting it wholeheartedly, dancing together in a rhythm of love, and tasting each other. Yoseob grabbed the back of Doojoon’s neck to kept him in place while Doojoon s his arms around Yoseob’s waist to get them closer, getting more of that delicious friction from Yoseob that burned his body.

Clothes were thrown haphazardly in the living room while two bodies connected into one on the sofa. Moving in a pace only the both of them knew, only the both of them felt. Sobs of sadness were replaced by moans of pleasure, shivers of fear were replaced by shudders of satisfaction, whimpers of ‘Doojoonah, Doojoonah’ was replied by declarations of ‘I love you, Yoseobah, so much, so ing much’. It was frantic, it was slow, it was hard, it was gentle, it was awkward, it was beautiful, it was loving, it was passionate, it was burning, it was painful, it was amazing, it was intoxicating.  

The way Doojoon moved in and out, in and out, and the way Yoseob responded up and down, up and down.

It was nothing less than perfect.

It was love.

They made love one more time on the sofa before Doojoon scooped Yoseob up and headed to the bedroom. They made love two more times before both of them felt completely sated and wonderfully exhausted, falling into a nice slumber in each other’s embrace.

Yoseob was fully dressed, a huge luggage at his side and a backpack on his back, he stared down at the handsome man sleeping peacefully on the bed. Their love making had worn Doojoon out completely and he was immediately out like a light. Yoseob could still feel the magnificent pain on his lower back and his , he hoped the pain would never go away, a reminder of Doojoon’s love for him, he would always remember this night forever, the night where he was loved, truly completely loved.

He smiled sadly but he needed to go. He knew that Doojoon needed time to think about this, and he didn’t need any distraction for his study – a promise he had made to himself when he accepted the offer, a responsibility he had to carry. Everything happened too quickly tonight, and he wondered if Doojoon would regret it – Yoseob knew he would never ever regret anything – but Doojoon was straight, he was engaged, and Yoseob realized that everything that happened tonight, the bliss, the love, might only be products of the moment. Because Yoseob loved Doojoon too much – too ing much, he loved the older man more than anything in this world – he had decided to give him as much time and space as Doojoon needed, to think everything over without the awkwardness of Yoseob’s presence.

If they were meant to be together, they were meant to be together.

Yoseob took in every little details of the sleeping Doojoon and stored them in his brain so he would never forget. He smiled and started to walk out of the apartment door, a soft click was heard when the door locked.

So Yoseob had decided.

Doojoon woke up with a satisfied smile on his face as he relaxed on the bed. Last night was the best night of his life, finally Yoseob was his, fully his. He expected a soft and warm body curled up against him but there was nothing. The spot next to him was empty and cold. He frowned and quickly jumped out of bed.

“Yoseobah?” Doojoon called. When he received no answer, he his voice turned louder, “Yoseobah! Yoseobah!” He went to the kitchen and bathrooms and living room, but Yoseob was nowhere to be found, “Yah, Yang Yoseob!” Doojoon shouted and was only greeted by the echo of his own voice. He went to the bedroom and opened Yoseob’s wardrobe. The sight before him made him weak in the knees. He sunk down to his feet when he found the wardrobe was almost empty. Yoseob could never leave him, they loved each other, Yoseob would never leave him.

Doojoon quickly dressed in a crumpled white shirt and drove to the airport. He was about to call Yoseob when suddenly his phone went off as a message was received.

From: Yang Tiny

Time: 9.40 am

Goodbye, Doojoonie. Be happy.

He could not reach Yoseob after the message anymore because the younger man’s phone is turned off, cutting him off from the rest of the world. Cutting him off from Doojoon.