Mina was surprised with the sudden contact with Hirai Momo. She also noticed how she clung into her when she opened her eyes. She immediately unwrapped her arms around the older and sat on the bed. She said nothing, trying to understand the situation. Did Momo just kissed me? It’s a kiss right? I’m not dreaming right? Why did she suddenly kiss me? Mina would like to ask Momo but no words came out from . Momo doesn’t look at her eyes when she stood up, more like she panicked. Momo is drenched in her own sweat even though the morning breeze is too cold. It was really awkward. Then Momo immediately grab the door knob and glanced at her.

“Uhm, M-Mina, I’ll be going now, I-I’ll see you next week for the Jeju trip. Bye.” Momo said in haste.

Mina just nodded by the statement and Momo disappeared in a flash. Leaving Mina confused and speechless.

++

Momo rushed to her apartment, she even forgot to change her pajamas. Luckily there were only few people in the subway so she was quite saved from embarrassment. She couldn’t handle any more humiliation for today. She really doesn’t know what to say to Mina right now. She could not just blurt out her feeling. She doesn’t want to burden the younger with her one-sided love. She just wanted to help Mina get through this.

She kept thinking of what to say, she’s staring at her phone screen trying to compose a message to the younger.

MM: Thank you for letting me stay last night. I’m so sorry for what happened this morning. Please forget about that. Also, I’ll return your clothes after I wash them up. I’ll see you around.

Momo returned her phone inside her sling bag and she exhaled heavily. Her heart pounding with the memory of Mina’s lips on hers. She unconsciously touched her lips while rewinding the moment in her head. She was brought back to reality with the sudden stop of the train. She’s already at her stop.

++

“So you are telling me that you want to go to Jeju island this coming weekend?” Sana asked.

“Please Sana, also, tell Jihyo to come so it will be more fun” Momo pleads

“To be more fun? or you just don’t want me third wheeling with you and Mina?”

“Wh-what? It’s not like that Sana.”

“I know you Momo, I have known you for almost 10 years, and I know what’s going inside that little brain of yours”

“Okay, you win, so will you help me?” Momo asked with pleading eyes.

Sana glared at Momo. She’s soft for Momo, even though they always argue, she cared for this person so much. When Momo wanted to do something, Sana will always support her. Sana is stupid herself, giving in to Momo’s requests is one of her weaknesses. She can’t say no to her.

“You’re hopeless Momo, I can never say no to you, you know it.” Sana admits.

“Thank you Satang~” she hugged Sana tight.

“I’ll ask for my parents to give us extra allowance th– “ Sana was cut by Momo

“I’ll pay for my own Sana, you don’t have to cover for me, your parents helped me so much”

Sana just nods, she knows Momo is so stubborn and won’t let her pay for the expenses.

++

Momo accepted a part time job of teaching dances after her class. It pays well and it can cover her travel expenses. She rarely sees Mina since she’s been busy juggling her schedule with school and work. But today is different. She went home straight to cook dinner. She packed some and bring with her the clothes Mina lend her last time.

It was almost seven in the evening when she arrived at the door of the younger’s apartment. She knocked.

++

Mina is not expecting anyone at this moment. Upon opening the door, she sees Momo awkwardly standing and she’s not looking at her eyes. She stared at the visitor, waiting for her to say something.

“I’ve brought your clothes, I washed it, and I also cooked dinner, please have some” Momo raised the paper bag she’s holding giving it to Mina.

“T-thank you Momo, you don’t have to do this.” Mina accepted the offer. “Come in, you can have some – “

“N-no it’s okay, I have to go, I just dropped by to give them to you” she said and finally looked at the younger eyes.

When Momo turned her back to walk, Mina stopped her by grabbing her jacket. Mina doesn’t know why she stopped Momo, it’s a subconscious reaction but when she saw Momo turned her back, it felt weird, it doesn’t feel right. The older turned and Mina was staring at the ground. “Uhm, Mina?”

“I-I’m sorry, I just want to say I am looking forward to our trip” Mina released her grip and entered her dorm. Momo’s eyes followed Mina. And she felt butterflies in her stomach. She felt hot in her neck. Am I that whipped? Spazzing out over that simple statement.

++

Mina entered her room and her mind is completely confused. She’s afraid of her sudden action a while ago. Her thoughts start to wander on the times when Momo saved her. Remembering the warm feeling of gratitude towards the older.

One instance, when Jeongyeon stood her up on their date, reasoning that something school related came up, Momo instead accompany her. They went to the nearest mall to buy stuffs, Momo’s company eases her upset mood earlier. Momo tried to cheer her up, they even went to an arcade because she knows Mina loves games. It was fun. Momo couldn’t beat Mina in any games she tried. They haven’t noticed the time is running and it was already time for dinner. To fill their hungry stomachs, they looked for a place to eat.

Mina stopped walking suddenly upon seeing a group of people heading out of one of the luxurious restaurant. Momo glanced to the same direction Mina was looking. She saw Jeongyeon and her parents, and Nayeon. Nayeon is clinging into Jeongyeon. Momo quickly grabbed Mina’s hands and pulled them to leave the place. Momo got a lot of things to ask Jeongyeon later but what’s more important now is Mina. She brought Mina to an almost empty park where she can cry her heart out. Mina’s tears about to fall, her efforts to suppress them from falling have failed. Teardrops are falling in her hands. Momo held them, and the other wiped her tears.

“I know Jeongyeon has her reasons, I know she wouldn’t want to hurt you” Momo gently said while still wiping her tears.

“I don’t know what to believe anymore, Momo”

“It’s going to be okay.. Let’s trust Jeongyeon”

“Can I ask a favor?… Can we drink?” Mina asked

Momo’s face looked surprised. “Can you even handle alcohol?”

“I don’t know, I want to try” Mina said in between sobs.

Momo went to the convenience store to buy few cans. Upon her return, she opened one can and give it to Mina. Momo knows really well that she has low alcohol tolerance so she doesn’t even drink a bit. Mina gulps the full content straight. It was a new sight for Momo. Mina reached for the second and the third.

“Mina, I think that’s enough” Momo tried to stop her, she can confirm that Mina can’t drink. Mina is stubborn when drunk.

“I can drink , *hiccup* more” Mina tried to convince Momo. But Momo took the can and threw them away. “I’ll take you home, you can’t even handle three” Momo squatted and instructed the younger to hop in her back. She piggybacked her. Mina complied weakly, her arms reached for Momo’s shoulder. She can smell the older’s shampoo and she felt comfortable. Momo walked slowly at the side walk of an empty street. Her thoughts wander around Mina. She wanted to protect this girl so much and it hurts to see her like this.

God, please don’t let Mina hurt anymore. Can you just punish me instead? She doesn’t deserve to be in pain. Momo is not a religious person but at this moment, she sincerely prayed for Mina’s happiness. Hoping that everything will be alright. She loves this girl so much. And she has accepted her role as the best friend ever since she saw the adoration in Mina’s eyes towards Jeongyeon.

“Why are you so kind Momo?” Mina blurted, eyes closed. She felt comfortable in Momo’s back, her arms extending over the latter’s shoulder.

“… I’m not really kind.” Momo just stated. There was a long silence. Momo assumed that Mina fell asleep.

“I’m only like this towards you” Momo whispered to herself.

++

Tzuyu opened the dorm and was surprised to see Mina wasted. Momo brought Mina to her bed and bid goodbye to Tzuyu.

Momo messaged Mina.

MM: You couldn’t handle the alcohol. I won’t let you drink next time, you’re too heavy. I left an aspirin beside your bed, drink it when you wake up.

Mina saw the message in the morning.

MN: I never told you to lift me home. But still, thank you. :)

Later that day, she received a call from Jeongyeon and they talked things out regarding Nayeon. Before that, Momo talked to Jeongyeon about the deal with Nayeon and Jeongyeon assured her that the marriage will never happen. Momo believed in Jeongyeon that she will never hurt Mina.

++

Today is the start of Chuseok festival, and today is the first day of their Jeju island vacation.

“Hi Mina, this is Sana, and this is Jihyo” Momo introduced while they are in waiting are at the airport.

“Uhm Hi, I heard a lot about you Sana from Momo, and I saw you sometimes in the university, nice meeting both you” Mina greeted.

“Come on, let’s get going” Jihyo initiated

Their flight is a bit awkward. Momo is seated in between Mina and Sana, Jihyo is at the back row. Momo didn’t planned this. Because no one’s talking, she eventually fell asleep. She woke up leaning on Sana’s shoulder and the latter is leaning on her head also sleeping. She saw Mina on her earphones eyes closed, maybe sleeping. And she can’t help but stare on her lips, the memories are replaying on her mind but she immediately erased the thought.

++

It was not as cold as Seoul but the scene that unfolds in front of their eyes is stunning. Jeju island is breathtakingly beautiful. Mina’s thankful that she agreed to Momo’s invitation to join them, it eases her mind and heart. But Mina couldn’t deny the newfound confusion with Momo. She tries her best to forget the perplexing emotions and enjoy the whole trip.

They arrived at the hotel inn that Momo booked beforehand. They got 2 rooms with 2 beds each. Since Mina doesn’t know Sana and Jihyo well, Momo ended up sharing the room with her.

Momo starts to unpack her baggage. Mina’s emptying out her luggage as well. Both of them feels the awkward atmosphere.

“Minari.. if you want, I could switch room with Sana or Jihyo..” Momo proposes.

“You don’t have to, I’m more comfortable sharing the room with you..” she gently says. “Ah, that’s a relief” Momo said.

“Well, I’ll be going to the market with Sana first and we’ll go to the shore after. You can wait for us or you can go ahead with Jihyo.” Momo added

“Can I go with you?” Mina didn’t hesitate to ask. She felt alone without Momo around.

“Ahh sure, let’s go after we’re done here”

Mina tagged along with Sana and Momo going to the market to buy ingredients for their lunch and dinner. Sana felt slightly annoyed with Mina, she could not really object with Momo’s wishes after all. They rented the old vehicle of the inn owner and Momo is the only one who knows how to drive. Mina sat at the passenger’s seat while Sana is seated at the back. Sana is glaring at the two, more like observing Mina, Mina is really pretty, she admits, and she’s well-mannered and kind. She cannot point any flaws towards the younger. Only if she could find one, she can easily despise the person. But unfortunately there is none. I now understand why Momo loves this girl. Momo is casually talking to Mina about the things to buy or what the younger would like.

They arrived at the store and bought tons of meat and black pork. Some vegetables and sausages. Sana observed there is a slight awkwardness between the two. She pulled Momo away and whisper.

“Hey, what’s with you and Mina? I felt uncomfortable watching you.” Sana demands an answer.

“W-what are you talking about? We’re fine.” Momo lied. Momo is trying hard to make Mina comfortable specially around her. It was Momo’s fault that things are a bit awkward now due to the last sleep over, and also last time she visited Mina, she felt the younger been acting strange as well.

They went back right after they got everything they need in the market and in the convenience store. Jihyo already set up the grilling area and the tables outside the inn in front of the shore. Jihyo is like a mother, very dependable.

“Moguri! I prepared everything you’ll need, let me know if you need help with the food preparation as well” Jihyo said as she approached Momo.

“Moguri?” Mina asked chuckling at unfamiliar nick name.

“Yes Mina, that’s what we usually call this raccoon, see, doesn’t she looked like one?” Jihyo cracked and pointed at Momo’s unamused face.

“Wow, Jihyo, no meat for you later” Momo teased.

Mina is laughing at the silliness of the two. It’s fun to watch how they teased Momo, it’s been a while since she laughed this hard. The rest are changing into their swimming attire while Momo is grilling the meat while preparing the avocado salad. Momo is wearing her white loose T-shirt and ripped denim shorts. A few moments later, the three went outside.

Momo was distracted when her eyes found Mina. The weather is quite hot but the heat at the back of Momo’s neck are more noticeable. She hasn’t seen Mina wore clothes that revealed her stomach and bare shoulders. She’s wearing red short-sleeve strapless shirred tube crop top shirt and ripped denim shorts. Mina tied her long black hair in a bun. Her heart beats faster when she noticed that the younger is approaching her. She gulped the lump in and closed .

“Momo, you can change inside, I’ll take over here for the meantime.” Mina grabs the tong from Momo’s hands and turned her back facing the grill. Momo is now facing the back of Mina and it doesn’t help her when she saw Mina’s bare shoulders this close and Mina’s nape which is slightly covered in sweat due to the smoke of the grill. Mina felt Momo is not moving at her back so she turn her head to confirm the older’s presence. Too close. Their faces are few inches apart and Mina felt this weird feeling again. Her eyes meet Momo’s, her brown orbs are piercing through her soul.

“Moguri!” Jihyo suddenly shouted, and Mina shifted immediately to the grilling meat as if it is the most interesting thing in the world. Momo ran to Jihyo who seems troubled with the portable stove.

Mina find it hard to breath with the earlier encounter with Momo. She’s comfortable with Momo, but sometimes there’s something in Momo’s eyes she could not understand that makes her feel tied up in knots.

Momo came back, Mina noticed the older’s presence and her eyes were glued to the toned body. Momo is not a dancer for nothing. Now she confirmed why Momo’s hug is very comfortable by looking at those strong limbs. Momo approached Sana and they are sharing the ice cream they bought earlier. She noticed that they are very close, super close. Mina wanted to ignore the sudden tightness in her chest.

Jihyo approached Mina who is busy staring at the two. “They are always like that, at first you can assume they are dating, but they are just childhood friends” Jihyo started. “When I first met those two, I learned that Momo’s been through a lot, she’s abandoned by her only family, her father, for a 10-year-old kid, she’s very strong. I admire Momo for that. And I also like how Sana supported Momo all through these years. They are inseparable.”

Mina felt her heart ache. She realized she knows nothing about Momo. All the pain she felt is nothing compared to what Momo have been through. Mina’s been seeing Momo as the dependable one, a strong foundation. A person so beautiful inside and out. What she doesn’t know is what’s behind those caring eyes, the fragile kid that needs someone to depend on too.

++

The meals are all done and they took their seats to eat. Momo wrapped the grilled pork in a lettuce and feeds Sana, like an instinct. Mina noticed this. Sana smiled at the older and Momo wiped some sauce dripping on her lips. Momo wrapped another one and she lifted it in front of Mina. Mina is startled by the sudden action. Momo’s mouth gestures into big “O” signaling for her to open . She complied and eats the wrap made by the older. Mina looked away, she felt uncomfortable all of a sudden.

Jihyo and Sana were chatting about their school project. Momo is happily eating and she noticed that Mina doesn’t even tasted the avocado salad she made. She took her chopsticks and picked a mouthful of salad wrap. Momo again, tries to feed Mina but she shook her head.

“I don’t like avocados” Mina said and slightly pushed Momo’s hands. Momo pouted. Mina was surprised to see this side of Momo. She never acted cute in front of her before. How can she say no to that. That’s so unfair. Momo retreats her hand and shifts the food to to eat the salad instead but Mina suddenly consume the food on her chopsticks. Momo’s heart skipped a beat. The younger’s side profile is perfect. She can smell the pleasant fragrance of Mina’s shampoo and she can actually see the moles on her well sculpted face because of their proximity.

Momo was dazed and her eyes followed Mina who gets back properly on her seat and continued eating. Mina doesn’t really like the taste of avocados but she decided she could give it a chance since Momo liked it so much. She finished the meal as well.

The group went to swim after they clean up. But Momo decided to stay at the shore and just watch the three. She grabbed something to read and lay on one of the reclining chair under the shade of an umbrella.

Mina sat beside Momo while applying sunscreen on her exposed skin. She’s curious however, on why Momo wants to stay at the shore. She wanted her to join them.

“Why don’t you join us Momo?”

“I’m okay. I enjoyed just staring at the sea”

“But.. It is more fun if you joined us” Mina trying to convince Momo.

“No, I’m good, you should go and join them”

“But – “

“I CAN’T SWIM. I am afraid to swim” Momo confessed. It was hard for her to reveal her weaknesses in front of anyone. Momo looked down, and continue reading to divert her attention and hoping Mina would just leave her alone as of the moment. Mina just stood up and leave. Momo felt guilt-ridden to the younger since she just raised her voice to the other. She was pressured and she feels aggravated and vulnerable at the moment. She occasionally glances at the group and she noticed that Mina was swimming alone at deeper area while the other two was at the opposite side. She noticed Mina is a good swimmer. She forgot what she’s reading and is now focused on Mina. She finds solace knowing Mina is enjoying this vacation. The younger really loves the sea.

All of a sudden, she noticed that Mina is struggling and is trying to catch attention. Is Mina drowning? Without further thoughts, Momo ran towards the direction of Mina, her heart is beating fast due to the adrenaline. Momo wasn’t sure if what she’s doing is right, her heart filled with fears of losing Mina, she doesn’t know how to breath properly in the water but she managed to get a hold of the younger. Gasping for air, Momo pulled Mina above the surface then Momo felt the tightness in her chest. Her body becomes heavy and she cannot feel anything. Her vision is fuzzy and she slowly closed her eyes. Images of Mina runs through her head. The first time she saw her, the moment she fell in love with her. The memories are flashing right in front of her. She smiled. Is this the end?

++

A/N: Don’t lose hope everyone. I’ll try to update tomorrow if I can.

Soon when all is well, you’re going to look back on this period of your life and be so glad that you never gave up.- Brittany Burgunder