Sana wished for Momo to come back, but not like this. Momo is obviously a mess. The moment she entered the apartment, she broke down in her arms crying her lungs out. She’s afraid to know what’s making the older weep. It’s painful to watch that the strongest person she knew is crying like there’s no tomorrow.

“What happened, Momoring?”

“I failed big time Sana… I couldn’t keep my promise to Mina. I don’t deserve to be with her” she uttered. Every word that escaped is agonizing to hear.

“What do you mean?” Sana is confused. Did she break up with Mina? Why is she crying like this?

Momo began to calm down and wiped her own tears. She composed herself and faced Sana. She held on to the younger’s hands tightly. Eyes still red with tears threatening to fall.

“Can you promise me that you won’t tell Mina about this?” she started and Sana nods in agreement, she felt anxious suddenly.

“I’m sick, a serious one. I was diagnosed months after the New Year. And the doctor said my chances of survival are slim. I couldn’t believe it at first, I don’t want to believe what she said. It took several days before the truth finally dawned on me. I can no longer move my limbs the way I wanted to, I could no longer dance and chase after my dreams. That’s why I decided to drop out from college to work and save for my surgery. But I don’t have much time left, Sana. I could no longer take care of Mina, I don’t want her to suffer because of me. I’m afraid of many things Sana I don’t even know if I made the right decisions.”

Sana felt her knees weak upon hearing the older’s story. It was too much to take. Momo is sick? Chances of survival are slim? Cannot move the limbs, drop out from college, don’t have much time left. It struck her, she felt her hands shaking and she couldn’t believe everything she heard. It is a dream, right?

“Don’t you dare die on me Momo” with shaky voice, she managed to say while clutching on the older’s shoulder.

Momo gave her a weak smile. This situation isn’t right. She won’t allow this to happen. Sana, quickly grabbed her mobile phone and called someone.

“Dad, can you look for the best heart surgeon in Japan? Please, we need to save Momo.”

“What happened to Momo? Alright we’ll find one and I’ll book a flight for her in a week.”

Momo was dazed overhearing the conversation. “Sana, your family had done so much for me, that was too much to ask of them. I couldn’t always trouble your family like that”

“Momo, you’re a family. And I will hate you forever if you leave me” Sana’s tone was serious, and her eyes were reddish and puffy, staring at the older.

++

Two days passed and Momo is now packing her things for her flight to Japan in a few days. She hasn’t opened her mobile phone, she might break down if she saw the messages Mina is sending her. She’s in her old room when she heard a knock at the apartment’s door.

Sana opened the door, and it wasn’t really a surprise to see Mina. Sana knew the younger has been crying these days because of the black circles under her eyes and the pale skin. She felt empathetic to Mina.

“Is Momo here? Please tell me Sana” Mina held Sana’s hand pleading for her answer.

“I’m sorry Mina, but I still have no news of her, I couldn’t reach her mobile either” Sana lied. She promised Momo she wouldn’t tell her about her whereabouts. That she’s just inside the apartment, in her old room. Mina couldn’t hold her tears and Sana felt the urge to comfort her. She hugged her, she felt bad for Mina and she knew if the younger knows the truth it will hurt her more, maybe that’s why Momo wanted to keep it from her.

“I-I don’t understand any of these, Sana, it’s killing me, Momo would never leave me like this, it doesn’t make sense” she cried finding comfort at Sana’s shoulder. She patted her back acknowledging her pain. It hurts her too, this situation, Momo doesn’t deserve all of this, Momo is the one who is more hurt, both physically and emotionally.

On the other side, Momo was leaning in the door of her room, she heard it all, it crushed her hearing the messy cry of her loved one. It was devastating. She cupped to prevent the crying sound from coming out. She missed her so much. She wanted to be with Mina more, but she couldn’t. How can she be with Mina if she couldn’t take care of her, if she would leave her eventually? If she’s not even sure if there was a future for her.

She picked her mobile and dialed a number. She decided to call someone suddenly.

“Can we meet?”

++

Today is the day of Momo’s flight, Sana is with her at the airport.

“I wanted to go with you”

“You have to graduate Sana, I don’t want you to ruin your studies just because of me”

“I’ll follow to Japan after this semester, please be okay for me, please”

“I’ll wait for you Satang” she hugged the younger and pecked her cheek as she went inside the boarding area.

I love you Momo. I’ll pray for your surgery. Please be okay when I get there.

++

Alone in her dorm, Mina felt gloomy, they made so much memories here. Every corner of her room it reminds her of the older. This is suffocating. In a moment, she heard a knock on the door, her heart suddenly jumped out of her chest, she ran towards the door and opened it.

“Hi Mina”

“Jeongyeon?”

The excitement fades away and replaced by confusion. Her feelings were mixed up. She doesn’t know how to react with the appearance of her ex-lover. But she couldn’t bring herself to feel anything other than dismay that it was not Momo who knocked at her door. She lost her grip at the door knob and felt a squeeze in her heart.

“Can I come in?” Jeongyeon asked pointing her finger inside the dorm. Mina gave way to her as a sign that she could enter. Jeongyeon changed a bit, her hair is longer and is dyed in ash brown. Mina settled in her couch where she was originally seated before. Jeongyeon sat beside her.

“Mina, I’m sorry for leaving you before, I regret what I did. I broke off the engagement with Nayeon.” She explained even before Mina could say anything

Oh right, she left me for Nayeon, and now, Momo left me without a word, is that their friendship code to leave me after they make me fall? It was hard her to digest everything what’s Jeongyeon is saying. Sorry, regret, broke off, engagement, Nayeon. At least she understood the meaning of those words. So what.

Jeongyeon held her hand rubbing the surface with her thumb. The touch feels foreign for Mina. It was the warmth she used to love but it doesn’t feel right anymore. She removed her hand from the contact.

“What do you need?” She said straightforwardly.

“I want your forgiveness; I want to do things right this time.” Jeongyeon pleaded.

“I’ve forgiven you long before, but I am not the same person you’ve known before, everything’s changed.”

“It’s alright, I understand. Friends?” she bargained.

“Okay, friends.”

++

Days feel like months; months feel like years. It was too slow for Mina, who is mending her broken heart. Every day she stares at the only photo she had with Momo, the one they took in the photo booth at one of their dates. She’s contemplating when will she be able to stop looking at this. When will she stop messaging a number that doesn’t want to be reached. When will she stop visiting Sana’s apartment to check if Momo visited her best friend.

“Mina, you should give up” Sana felt guilty by the frequent visit of Mina, she wanted to tell her everything but she promised Momo she won’t. All she can do for her is to stop getting her hopes up.

“I-I’m sorry, I just, I want to see her” she held back her tears.

“She’s in Japan.” Finally, she gave an information to her. I’m sorry Momo, just this once.

“Where in Japan? Please tell me” she insisted.

“I don’t know Mina, I just knew she’s there.” She lied. She could no longer break any more promise she made with Momo.

++

It was almost the end of the term in university, in few days, they are going to graduate. Jeongyeon and Mina was at the school cafeteria chatting.

“Are you sure you want to go to Japan after graduation?” Jeongyeon asked. She knew why Mina wanted to go there.

“Yes, no backing out.”

“You still love her? She’s broken up with you right?” Jeongyeon intently asked. Mina stopped eating suddenly and looked at the one asking. Yes, I still love that idiot. I’m still hoping that when I go to Japan, one day I’ll be able to see her.

“Yes and Yes” the answer is short but Jeongyeon felt an ache after hearing her answer. She knew she lost her the moment she left her. Momo was there for Mina during those times and now, the situation is reversed. But it was different. She felt she no longer has a chance with Mina but she wanted to stay friends with her.

“I still couldn’t understand why Momo contacted me when you two broke up” her thoughts slipped her tongue. She wished she could get back what she said.

“What did you say?!” Mina’s tone raised with the question. She couldn’t believe what she just heard. “Momo contacted you? What did she say? Why you didn’t tell me about this?” she seems frustrated. Jeongyeon can feel it by the eagerness in her voice.

“I-I’m sorry. I really came back to Korea because Momo begged. We met before I went to your dorm that day. She just told me she couldn’t take care of you and asked me to take care of you instead. Then she left, I couldn’t contact her anymore.”

“She couldn’t take care of me? I didn’t even ask her to do that” Mina propped her head in frustration. Everything doesn’t make sense at all. She hated the fact that Momo contacted Jeongyeon to stay by her side and left her.

++

It was graduation day, Sana was not really happy, she’s worried, she just received a call from her father that Momo is in critical condition, the graduation date coincides with the date of her surgery. It took so long because of the scarcity of blood donors, due to rare blood type, and few relatives. And now, they moved her to ICU.

She felt she needed to fly to Japan as soon as possible, she already has her tickets but she must attend the graduation first.

“Sana, you don’t seem well” asked Jihyo who is now at the hall beside her.

“I need to go to Japan Jihyo, I should be there”

“Because of Momo?” She hasn’t told anyone about this situation, she was surprised by the sudden mention of Momo’s name.

“H-how did –“

“You are always spacing out, after Momo’s disappearance, you became like that, it’s obvious that you’re talking about her” she stated, she knew her well to understand what’s going on with Sana. “Just calm down and you can go to her right after this”

Sana just nodded. Still feeling worried.

Please hold on Momo, don’t give up.

++

A/N: I have little to zero knowledge about the said disease Momo has, please be reminded that this is pure fictional. Please understand.