Seungkwan change his method for avoiding Vernon. Before the MT he will tried so hard to not meet Vernon and it's so obvious, he will turn around if he see him, he will said he busy if Vernon talk to him, but now he make it more careful, when he meet him he will greet him, talking to him. But he will not searching or come to Vernon’s workplace. Vernon know and feel that Seungkwan reduce the time for them being together, but being insensitive Vernon as long as the man talk to him, and was not obvious avoiding him, he think that all was fine. That Seungkwan’s new behaviour make Vernon neglectful.

 

Everything is looks normal, but for Seungkwan, the day after MT never been the same, he can’t see Vernon same as before.Seungkwan might be falling deep on his feeling toward him, he can’t back or move forward. The only choose he has is move on and he hate that choice so much. He being trapped on his own feeling, and it's magically make him want to study english hard. Why? Because he takes Jihoon’s advice, he need to cut him off clearly, then, he can’t do that if the man keep being his english mentor.

 

Seungkwan looking for the best way to end the tutoring session, and finally find one. He work really hard for it. The last time he study very hard is when he going to take university test. Now, he study very hard for running away from someone he like so much, and if you recall, it is ridiculous. But then again, he has not choice.

 

The time finally come, all his hard work will be end today. Now, Vernon is in front of him, smile so handsome. Seungkwan hate himself that always bewitched with that gummy smile.

 

“Are you ready?” Vernon asked and Seungkwan nodded. Today is the evaluation day, Vernon will give him some test, if his scores worst, Vernon will be get cut and Seungkwan will looking another mentor. if the scores good then Vernon has a chance to keep menthoring him. Seungkwan could make it bad and cut him off as his mentor but not on personal life and not as friends, so he really really work hard and will make Vernon grant what he want.

 

“Bring it.” Seungkwan said confidently. Vernon give him the paper and ready to start counting but then seungkwan stop his hand to start the timer, Vernon look at him. “Wait.” He said. “if i get a perfect score, could you grant my wish?” he asked and vernon frowned.

 

“What kind of wish?” he asked back

 

“I won’t tell you now, just promise me first.” he said. Vernon think that there is nothing to lose to said yes, he think maybe Seungkwan just want some gift from him, and what he want is expensive he could grant it, he have more money than before, that thought make him nodded.

 

“Okay, i promise i will grant your wish if you get a perfect score.” he said, seungkwan smile. The smile that rarely Vernon see these days,he happy see that smile. He wonder what kind of smile he get when he grant his wish.

 

After that, seungkwan start the test, Vernon waiting beside him and killing time with read, prepare his debate topic, or just open and playing game on his phone. Until seungkwan finished it, he give the paper to Vernon and now Seungkwan that waiting him to finished his job.

 

“Wow.” Vernon said and give the paper to Seungkwan. “You really get better.” he said. Seungkwan take the paper and take a deep breath before open the paper, and yes he got a perfect score.

 

Seungkwan suddenly change his face, he look gloomy, he supposed to be happy with that perfect score, but he was not. A big sigh draw from him and stare at Vernon that smile widely showing his gummy to the man. And Seungkwan feel like thunder hit his heart, he feel hurt.  

 

“Why you look… sad? You got your wish granted from me, tell me what are you wish for?” Vernon asked, he ready to buy anything for the man, he know that Seungkwan must be study so hard, the test was not really his level and Seungkwan could clear it.

 

Vernon stare at the man, he waiting him to said something. Seungkwan suddenly take a deep breath, feel nervous with what he will said later. In a second, Seungkwan want to change his mind and just forget about the plan. the man in front of him didn’t know how he pray that the test get at least one wrong answer so he could take back the wish, but now, there is no time to get back. In the end, the other thought to keep on his plan is win.

 

“Hey why are you look so nervous? come on, you are the one that have a wish and want it to be granted, tell me what is it?” Vernon ask again due the other man just keep silent and show a strange face.

 

Seungkwan take a deep breath before speak. “I told my mom that today will be our last day as Student and English mentor. I am sorry, and then my wish are ; i want us to be stranger.” seungkwan said it, finally. And he can see how Vernon face change.

 

“What do you mean with being stranger?” Vernon asked, didn’t understand.

 

“Like we never know each other, don’t say hi to me, don’t talk to me and i will do it too to you.” Seungkwan said, in very soft and calm tone, and Vernon feel annoying with that tone. From there, he know Seungkwan planning it all long.

 

“I can’t believe it.” he said while his palm rubbed his face. “Did i do something wrong?” he asked and Seungkwan shook his head. “Is this because what i said at Cafe weeks ago?” he said in very frustrated and annoyed tone.

 

“No there is nothing wrong with that, i just…” Seungkwan paused then tried to hold back the pain on his chest. “I don’t think we could be friend anymore, there is nothing wrong with you, it's just me.” Seungkwan said and Vernon didn’t understand. How could he can understand? all of this happen is so confusing. First Seungkwan avoiding him, then he act normal like nothing happen. When he think all good, he suddenly being cut off.

 

“You know that what you asked is too much, cruel and very disappointing.” Vernon said, Seungkwan could feel the man hold is anger.

 

“You promised me that you will grant my wish, so keep your promise.” Seungkwan said, he just shoot the right place, Vernon is a person that always keep his promise, it's one of his pride, and even the promise is so ridiculous like now, he will do it.  

 

Vernon noded, “fine, if that what you want.” he said. Vernon didn’t know that the man in front of him really want to take all the word back, he get hurt, he really want to beg Vernon to forget everything. But it's too late, he could see that Vernon get hurt too with what he wish.

 

“I need to go to the coffee shop.” he said after a while they are on silent, he clean his thing, make sure there is nothing left. They get up in silent, there must be so much thought cross their mind. Seungkwan him to the door, he tried to not show how hurt he was to decide this. He tried to look at vernon, and tried hard to smile, he won’t left a bad face to Vernon for this separation. But, Seungkwan never know that his smile is hurting Vernon more.

 

“Thank you.” Seungkwan said and Vernon noded.

 

“So,this is goodbye then.” Vernon said and Seungkwan nodded. He turn his back and closed the door.

 

Thing that just closed is the door but it feel like they also closed all of their heart and hope. The hurt that they feel might be have the same portion, the urge to take all back like an old time maybe cross their mind, but no one from them want to talk or beg the other for start all of it from the beginning. Each of them think, that maybe they need space, when everyone know that they don’t. If only they didn’t hide whatever feeling they have to each other. They might be not end like this.

 

But we know this is not the end of them.

 

***

 

short and hurt, i will update soon to end the pain for all of you.

Thank you for reading my trash and please leave some comment.