“I have been doing alright. But I’ll be honest with you.” Taemin started after recovering from his laugh. “This is the first time in a year I laughed like this.”

Minho’s lips pulled into a small smile, but he didn’t say anything – there was no reason to do so. But when Taemin stayed quiet as if he was waiting for Minho to say something, the latter felt like it had been wrong not to stay quiet. While he was thinking of how to act like a normal human being, his hands were fumbling nervously and Taemin noticed.

“Do you want to say something?”

“No…” Minho answered, blushing slightly.

“Do you mind me walking you home?”

Minho was confused, why would Taemin want to accompany him on his way back home? He had never done that before? What was the use? It would just be a hazard for the younger to walk back to the café afterwards.

“Why?” He asked his eyes trying to focus on a spot somewhere on Taemin’s chest.

“No particular reason, I just want to spend some time with you.” The younger said, surprising Minho.

He didn’t really hear things like this. No one ever had wanted to spend time with him – at least no one said so before. Yes, at university had paired up with other students for group projects in seminars, but there people usually just chose him as a partner because they knew that if they did, they wouldn’t have to do any of the work as Minho disliked to meet up with his partners. Most of the time he just told them that he would finish the project and write the other person’s name on it. That was the easiest solution both for the other student and him. He didn’t have to make arrangements and talk to another person and the other could expect a good grade without investing any work.

Minho remembered that he didn’t finish his work today, Taemin had taken too much of his time in the café. Taemin. He was standing there, waiting for Minho to show the way.

“S-Sorry, I was thinking.” Minho mumbled looking at the floor.

Taemin had noticed the taller spacing out again and patiently waited for the latter to get back to reality. When he did, the younger smiled at him – not that Minho would notice, he barely looked at Taemin, even less his face.

“Don’t worry about it. But you’ll have to show the way!” Taemin said and Minho scratched the back of his hand before walking in the direction he was previously headed.

While they were walking the streets, Taemin rarely shut up. He was telling the taller about all the things that happened in the last year; his controlling parents, his school, his uncountable extra lessons at academies, how he distanced himself from who he had thought were his friends, and also how he graduated – his English grade mostly based on “The Picture of Dorian Grey”.

From time to time when Taemin watched Minho from the side, noticing how the latter smiled at certain comments he made, shook or nodded his head at other things – his reactions not always corresponding to the story he was telling. It was strange that he only realised this now but Minho’s initiate reactions sometimes were really unfitting to what he was saying. A smile when he was talking about his endless hours studying and crooked eyebrows when he was talking about the one time his parents complimented him.

The younger one wasn’t sure if he could ask Minho about it without unsettling him, so he didn’t. He just kept talking, enjoying the new parts of the town he got to see. That was until Minho stopped in front of a pretty decent, regular house that incorporated a photo studio.

“Your house is pretty!” Taemin exclaimed and took a closer look at the store. “Are your parents photographers?”

Minho shook his head.

“My grandfather is. We live in the back.”

“Ah I see! We should let him take a picture of us one day.”

Minho’s answer came fast. “No.”

“Why though? You are so handsome, it would be a shame if we didn’t have a picture together. So next time we can’t see each other I don’t have to miss seeing your face.”

The taller was nervously playing with his fingers again.

“I- I- don’t like photographs of my, of myself.”

“Why?”

“The flash hurts me.” Minho said softly and Taemin lifted an eyebrow and decided to let this slide.

Somehow, he really wanted to have a picture of him and Minho before he enlisted. To have at least something he could put up on his lockers.

Minho showed signs of wanting to go inside, his feet nervously shifting while his eyes rapidly moved from the floor to the door and back.

“I will let you go inside now. Sorry for taking so much of your time.” Taemin said bowing slightly and Minho followed his example.

“You can leave first.” The taller said, making Taemin smile. Was he really going to watch how he left before going inside? He really was a gentleman. So did that mean that was he the lady? - Immediately Taemin shook his head to get those strange thoughts out of his head, how could he ever be a lady, that was ridiculous.

“No?” Minho asked, completely lost.

“Sorry! I was thinking about something else!” Taemin apologized instantly. “I am going first! Have a nice dinner, and I will see you tomorrow.”

Minho watched how the blonde boy from Seoul walked the familiar street back towards the café. He hoped Taemin would find the way back home. He was home already. A little later than usual which made his stomach turn.

It was strange to enter the place after his family finished dinner. He heard his siblings playing in the room next to his while he ate the almost cold dishes his mother had prepared. His usual Kimchi Jjigae was definitely less tasty when only lukewarm. He didn’t mind that much for most of the side dishes as they were mostly cold anyways. But the rice and stew, it was off. He knew it was his fault for getting back late, so he didn’t even think about telling his mother that his food was cold.

The dishes he put together neatly as always, carrying the small table with all of the dirty bowls to the living area that was combined with the kitchen. It was his day to do the kitchen – it looked as dirty as always. Minho seriously didn’t know how someone could be this messy.

Just like every week, he did his best, spending over an hour cleaning up the kitchen. His mother came by a few times grabbing a few things from a cupboard, not interacting with his son much besides asking about his day.

Minho wouldn’t have it any other way. It was how it always was.

The kitchen sparkled when he went to the bathroom to take a shower to clean himself up as well.  The water was quite warm – how he liked it. After rubbing himself with soap he felt all the tension of the long day release. A few times, his mind sprung back to Taemin. Did he say that he had missed him? He said he missed his face. Minho wondered if he had missed Taemin too. Was this how it felt to miss someone?

Minho had read about longing in many of his books, but he never quite experienced missing something, even less missing someone. After he dried himself completely, he went back to his room, looking for several books. Just a few minutes after there were three on his little desk.

“Gone with the Wind” by Margaret Michell, “Great Expectations” by Charles Dickens and “Wuthering Heights” by Emily Brontë.

Longing, yearning, craving, ache – there were many words. How did it feel? Was this how it felt?

In desperate need of answers, Minho spent the rest of his evening re-reading parts of these novels, trying to find a description of the feeling he felt deep inside of him so he could understand it.

For the first time in his life, he did not finish his assignments for the next day.

A/N

Hello everyone! I am here with a new update - in a decent amount of time if you ask me. I am actually quite proud of myself.

I hope you enjoyed it eheheh it is a little on the shorter side but I didn't want to prolong it just for the word-count...

Let me know how you liked it in the comments ALSO as always I am really happy to hear about things you want to read in the story. I take a lot of inspirations from people telling me their wishes for the story, be it specific scenes (Minho visiting Tae in the military or things like them kissing... idk) just if you have ideas/wishes please don't hesitate to leave them here. I won't garantee that I will put them in the story, but if they somehow fit and I can see myself writing them then it could be highly possible to see them in the furutre!!

This was a really long note. sorry everyone

Stay healthy

xx

R