5 months later I finally broke down, being the human I was.

Going through the pictures on social media, I saw that you had cut your hair short. We had just finished practicing for our 4th concert tour in Seoul and I was alone at the dorm. Some of the members had gone out to meet their families, some were on schedule. Sehun was sleeping, and Kyungsoo hyung had arrived just in time from his movie shooting to find me heaving in my room.

"I miss her hyung!"

I had cried as he had held me firmly, rubbing my back to comfort me. "It's okay Jongin-ah, it's going to be fine"

But it wasn't. And so on his encouragement, I had gone to the company after a few days, knowing you would be there.

I only had to wait a little while before you appeared, making my heart stop.

Your face had darkened seeing me, a glint of tears appearing almost immediately along with sadness and longing in those beautiful enchanting orbs of yours. The reluctance in your body language, so clear.

And I couldn't, Soojung. I couldn't do it to you again. I couldn't selfishly ask you to be with me again, making promises I knew I would break again. I was reminded of the times I couldn't be with you, the times you had waited for me for hours despite how tired you were yourself, your calls that had gone unanswered by me but most of all I was reminded of everything I couldn't give to you and you deserved so much better.

And before you could fully approach me, I had turned back. I heard the echo of your sobs soon after, but this time I didn't stop.

I shattered into a million pieces.

(Krystal's POV)

I missed you so much Jongin. I only realized it when I saw you after so many months. They were horrible for me. Why did you turn away?

Had you lost faith in us? Because I hadn't. We weren't beyond fixable. One word from you and I would have stayed. I would have waited for a thousand years for you had you just asked me to.

I guess it was my fault for not knowing better. I should've understood how tired you were I should've understood that you had other priorities as well and that you couldn't just be there for me all the time, instead of blaming it all on you.

But it was agonizing Jongin. Waiting for weeks on end to simply hear your voice. Waiting that didn't seem to end, especially when there was no surety or consolation from you that it would ever end.

And now I realize, I've been holding you back. I have been making you feel guilty for not being there, when it isn't even your fault in the first place.

Maybe it's better this way. Maybe I'll meet you in another life, where the circumstances would not pull us apart like this.

........................................................................................................................................

A/N: Sometimes being the humans we are, we just find it easier to let go. Even though it puts us through hell but we try to bear through it in hope of better times. Because those times do come, eventually.

"Verily with every difficulty there is relief" (Quran 94:5)

There is nothing in this world that is beyond repair, nothing that doesn't have a solution no matter how hard it is. All the diseases that are not treatable, are because we haven't found their cure. Yet. Not because their cure doesn't exist.

(Also, I'm sorry)