Yugyeom would do anything for his hyungs. He may seem like a giant cold-hearted maknae but he loved his hyungs. They loved him too even if he was annoying, they would just back. Yugyeom loved spending times with his hyungs and he loved being babied by them. It wasn’t always that way but that was in the past. There were interviews when the MC would question his position as the maknae and it would upset him but his hyungs would always be there for him. However, they could all get grumpy when they were preparing for a comeback or if they were promoting the comeback when they were tired. 

Yugyeom always knew they would get grumpy when preparing for comebacks. It happens with every idol group. Yugyeom was having doubts for this comeback. It wasn’t his hyungs he just felt that he wasn’t performing well. He was struggling and he knew it but he wanted to do something for his hyungs. They did a lot of things for him this was that least he could do for them. He needed to take some stress off of them and burden them by being a baby. 

For this comeback, they were slaving away at the company day and night to get the songs perfect so that their fans could be proud of them. They wanted this album to be special and unique. It was taking a lot of a toll on all of them in different ways. Jaebum was busy in the studio making new songs for the album and Jackson would help him a bit.  JYP decided he wanted them to have some special performances for this upcoming concert that they would a little after the comeback stage. That meant that the rest of the members were put to work as well. Mark and Bambam were making lyrics for a song that the rap line could preform, Youngjae and Jinyoung were working on a song that they would sing, and Yugyeom was making a dance for a solo performance. 

He felt like he wasn’t doing as much work as the others. Songs can be difficult to write and dancing just came so naturally to him. His part didn’t feel as difficult even if he was struggling. He could tell that this comeback was going to be a bit of a hard one. He was now just going over some old choreography since they were also performing some of their other songs in the concert. 

He was supposed to work on his solo stage but he decided that he would brush up on the old dances so he could help his hyungs when they could finally join him in the practice room. He stumbled fo the fifth time on this one part in the song. Of course, it was frustrating but he needed to do this for his hyungs. 

 It was almost five hours later when they were told they could go home. Yugyeom would’ve stayed back but his hyungs didn’t look like they could handle having one member missing. They all hopped into their van and waited for their manager. Everyone looked awful Jaebum and Jackson looked like death and the others didn’t look great either. 

Yugyeom could tell that they all were having a hard time coming up with songs. This made him feel worse. Sure his limbs were sore but he didn’t feel as tired. Jaebum observed s and asked,” so what do you guys think we should do for dinner?”

He heard groans in reply from almost everyone but Yugyeom. 

“Hyungs I can make something for dinner. You guys can shower and I’ll make something,” Yugyeom said with a smile. 

Jaebum smiled at the maknae proud of how mature he was. “ Thank you Yugyeom,” he replied.

Their manager got to the van and soon they were driving towards the dorm and some of the members had dozed off. Yugyeom smiled while looking at his hyungs. At least they were sleeping and they could rest and not feel stressed. 

They arrived at their dorm and Yugyeom softly shook his hyungs awake. All of them shuffled into the dorm with various faces of being annoyed, sleepy, or sad. Except for Yugyeom, of course, he didn’t feel like he deserved to feel any of those emotions since he felt like he didn’t have it as bad. Even though his limbs were heavy he put on a smile for his hyungs. He didn’t deserve to feel tired since they were struggling he also needed to let them know he was fine.

“I’m not completely sure if I can trust Yuggie in the kitchen,” Jinyoung said.  

“ Don’t worry hyung I’ll cook. You should go take a shower. I'm not that tired and you deserve a break. I won’t burn anything,” Yugyeom said in a rush. 

Jinyoung gave him a grateful smile and headed towards his room. Once everyone was in their room Yugyeom went into his room to take a shower. He didn’t share a room with anyone so he didn’t have to wait on anyone. 

It didn’t take him very long to shower, he thought he should be clean when he was making the food. He was walking out of his room when he bumped into Youngjae.

 Youngjae gave him puppy dog eyes and asked: “Yuggie can I use your bathroom Jackson is hogging ours.”

Yugyeom couldn’t say no so he nodded and continued to the kitchen. He didn’t know what he going to make, he hadn’t planned this. He looked in the cabinets and saw ramen. He thought ramen and some meat should please them. 

He started cooking and he heard people talking and footsteps, he figured that his hyungs decided to hang out in the living room. He heard them laughing and that made him smile. It was nice to know that they were happy. He quickly finished up dinner and called them into the kitchen. 

Of course, being the crackheads the are they all run into the kitchen. Now Yugyeom knows what Jinyoung feels like. 

“ Wow Yugyeomie this looks good,” Jaebum said, mouth-watering. Well, it was more like drooling but Yugyeom didn’t say anything.  

“ Thanks, hyung. I know it isn’t like Jinyoung hyungs cooking but I hope you enjoy it,” he said smiling.  

The rest of the members ate the food at an inhuman speed which baffled Yugyeom. It means he did a good job though. He soon realized that he only had a piece of meat but that was okay, his other members got to eat he needed to go on a diet anyway.

One by one the others left the table leaving Yugyeom to clean everything up. He didn’t call any of them back. It did kind of hurt that none of them had offered to help him out but he still smiled. He just went on cleaning the kitchen and humming a tune. 

He started thinking about what he should do for his solo performance. He needed to find a song and make a dance. He could choose something that as already choreographed but he wanted to give the fans something that he did. 

He gave it some thought before deciding he would work it out with the choreographer the next day. He walked back to his room after cleaning the kitchen and laid down on his bed. It was kind of lonely. There was no one to make jokes with or anyone to talk to. 

It was peaceful at first but now it was just lonely. Then again he didn’t want the others to be lonely. Yugyeom rather suffer than see them suffer. Which was why he was sad now. He could see that they were tired which was why he was going to be as nice to them as he could even if they yelled at him. It wouldn't have been the first time when they were having a comeback. 

He pushed those thoughts away and closed his eyes hoping to fall asleep. However, he couldn’t stop thinking. All of these thoughts kept coming to him, he tried many more times to go to sleep but it was like his brain wouldn’t shut off. 

He lay there in his bed staring into the darkness. This wasn’t the first time that this has happened. It happened when they first debuted. He would go to one of his hyungs to find comfort and sleep, but he was an adult he couldn’t just go wake one of his hyungs like a baby. 

Yugyeom decided he would just go to the studio and dance. Dancing was one thing that cleared his mind. He needed to work on his solo performance anyways. He checked the clock and he saw that it was 4 am. It was about an hour before they would have to wake up.

It wouldn’t be a big deal if he was at the studio before the others. They just wouldn’t know that he didn’t sleep. He would take care of it they didn’t need extra stress because he was being a baby. 
He changed into a hoodie and sweat pants. He snuck out of the dorm as quietly as he could and then started walking to the JYP building. He walked into the building and walked past the different practice rooms and he heard music coming from almost a. He knew his fellow labelmates had either stayed up into the early morning practicing or were starting early.

As far as he knew from what he heard Twice, Day6 and Straykids were there. He felt bad for them but he had things that he had to do. He spent thirty minutes getting to the practice room. Now he had less time to work on things before the others got here. Jinyoung would more than likely be up right now make breakfast and coffee. 

He also usually woke Yugyeom up first since he wouldn’t wake up easily. So he wasn’t surprised when he got a text from Jinyoung asking him where he was. Yugyeom decided to call because it was too much work to text the other. It was barely a second before he heard Jinyoung’s voice through the phone. 

“ Yugyeom where are you,” Jinyoung’s voice asked from the phone. 

“ Hyung I woke up early and I couldn’t go back to sleep so I came to the studio early.”

“ Ok Yuggie we have an early practice day today so don’t work too hard.”

“Ok hyung bye”

“Bye Yuggie,” Jinyoung said with a chuckle. 

Yugyeom hung up and immediately the music. He started dancing getting lost in the music. The song would change and he would start the choreography for that song. This went on for a good while before he stopped. 

He was taking a water break and then door burst open causing him to jump.

“See hyung I told you he would jump,” Bambam said clinging to Jackson. 

Yugyeom laughed with the others and stood up. 

“Ok guys lets start stretching we are going over the old choreography today and after that, we can work on the album and special stage pieces,” Jaebum said. 

Everyone groaned but started stretching anyways. Yugyeom stretched again despite the fact he had already started practicing. It wasn’t long before the choreographer walked in and listed the songs that they would be practicing. The songs weren’t bad but there was no telling how many times they would repeat them. The music started and everyone got into position and the day officially began. 

A few minor mistakes were made here and there but Yugyeom helped his hyungs and they looked grateful. Dance practice went by fast and since they finished early they were allowed to goof off a little before having to work on the album. 

That is exactly how they got here with Jackson laughing his head off and the others looking confused but also laughing.

Youngjae scooted over to Jaebum and whispered: “Hyung I think the organic food has made him go insane.” 

Suddenly Jaebum was laughing his head off too. Jinyoung now being a “single mother” was trying to keep everyone under control but that wasn’t easy. The only calm ones were Mark, Jinyoung, and surprisingly Yugyeom. 

Once the laughter died down and they calmed down Jaebum announced that they need to work on their solo performances and the album. The others got up and Yugyeom stayed on the ground. 

“ Don’t work yourself too hard Yuggie,” Jinyoung said before closing the door. 

The choreographer came back into the practice room ready to help Yugyeom with his dance. 

It seemed like forever until they were allowed to go home. Bambam was bounding towards the car with Jinoyung running after him screaming. Mark was grumbling something about not getting paid enough to deal with these crackheads and Yugyeom was just following behind with Youngjae clinging to him. 

Once the five of them were settled in the car Youngjae asked whether Jaebum and Jackson were coming. 

Jinoyung just shook his head and the others understood. The car drove away from the company and to the dorm. 

Just like usual the maknae line was rushing to the door with Mark and Jinyoung following.  

Jinyoung was too tired to deal with this. 

“Okay children I’m ordering take out so just go shower,” Jinyoung said already dialing the number. 

Yugyeom felt bad he knew that today was one of their harder days. Jaebum and Jackson were staying back. He knew that this was the first step to everyone be irritable. He went to his room and got in the shower it was only then that he realized how sore his muscles were. He just sighed feeling the hot water soothe his muscles. 

He turned the water off after going through his usual routine and looked into the mirror. He didn’t look too good. He looked a little thin and he had dark circles under his eyes. He needed to take better care of himself. 

He was staring at the wall when he heard Jinyoung yelling that the take out was here. Yugyeom almost slipped when he ran out of the bathroom. He didn’t want his hyung waiting on him but he had a feeling that Bambam would be the last one to get to the table. He rushed out of his room and got to the table as fast as he could. He was right he was second to last to the table. 

It was almost five minutes before Bambam got to the table. The others looked annoyed as the second youngest sat down at the table. Yugyeom saw a fight coming already before anyone said anything. This wasn’t going to end very well. Everyone started to eat and the tension was thick. He looked at Jinyoung who was staring at Bambam. 

“Bambam what took you so long to get here,” Jinyoung asked. 

“I was getting dressed what else would I be doing,” Bambam said with sarcasm 

Jinyoung looked surprised but then Mark stood up.

“ Don’t talk to your hyung like that,” he said his voice cold. 

Bambam looked at Mark and Jinyoung then at Yugyeom. Yugyeom didn’t know what to do he wanted to help Bambam out but he shouldn’t have said that. Instead of saying anything he just looked at the table. 

A chair screeched as it was pushed and a door slammed. Yugyeom looked back up to see that Bambam was gone and Mark and Jinyoung looked furious. Yugyeom looked at Youngjae but he just shook his head and also headed to his room. Yugyeom couldn’t blame him either he wouldn’t want to be near his hyungs hen they were mad either. 

“Hyungs,” Yugyeom said. 

Mark and Jinyoung turned to him still fuming. 

“ I can clean up when you finish eating,” he mumbled. 

Both Jinyoung and Mark nodded and for the rest of dinner, none of them said anything. Yugyeom just looked at the two of them hoping that they would be calm by the morning. 

“I’m finished good night you two,” Mark said and left the table. Jinyoung didn’t even say anything when he left leaving Yugyeom alone at the table yet again. 

He sighed, this was going to be a stressed filled comeback. Yugyeom cleaned u the containers and sat on the couch while playing with his phone. He looked at the time and it was almost midnight. Jaebum and Jackson weren’t back yet so he decided to wait for them. He sat there and waited and waited. 

“This must be how Jinyoung hyung feels when he waits for us,” Yugyeom said to himself.

It was nearly one in the morning when the door opened revealing Jaebum and Jackson. Yugyeom almost ran over to them happy to see that they were back and safe. 

“Hi Yuggie,” Jackson said.

Jaebum just gave him a nod before heading to the couch. 

“ Should I warm up the leftovers for you,” Yugyeom asked. 

Both of them shook their head saying that they would go straight to bed. Yugyeom went back to his room and sat on his bed. So far his plan to help his hyungs wasn’t going too well. They were supposed to not feel stressed yet they still were. He had failed at his job at being a good maknae. 

He laid down and just stared at the ceiling. He needed another plan so that they wouldn’t get mad at each other and not be stressed. He would do anything for them to not feel stressed. He spent a while staring at the ceiling thinking about what he could do. Before he knew it the sun was starting to rise and he had had yet another sleepless night. 

He didn’t think much of it though, he would just drink coffee and everything would be fine. He got up from his bed and suddenly everything started to get dark but he caught his balance on a chair before he could fall. He heard footsteps outside his door and he straightened himself before the door opened revealing a still mad Jinyoung. 

“ Get ready maknae,” Jinyoung said with a cold voice. 

There goes there a rock that keeps everyone sane. If Jinyoung was in a bad mood it put everyone in a bad mood. He turned to his closet and picked out clothes to wear to practice. He walked into his bathroom running his hand through his hair. How were they going to make it through this comeback if things were already falling apart? Yugyeom started brushing his teeth and washing his face when he heard yelling coming from downstairs. He rushed to put his clothes on and he ran down the stairs to see what was happening. 

Bambam and Jinyoung were yelling at each other again while Jackson and Jaebum were yelling at each other as well. None of them noticed him when he stepped into the living room. Yugyeom saw Mark observing the four in front of him with wide eyes. Youngjae was in the corner trying to stay away from the others. Mark seemed to be the only one who notices Yugyeom because he beckoned him over. 

“ Yugyeom can you help me get these four to stop yelling,” Mark asked. Yugyeom nodded and went over to Jinyoung and Bambam while Mark walked to Jaebum and Jackson. Yugyeom inched towards the two slowly trying to figure out a way to approach the two. 

“Hyungs,” he said

Instantly both Bambam and Jinyoung turned towards him. 

“What do you want,” Jinyoung asked with a cold voice. 

“ Can’t you solve what's wrong without yelling. It’s scaring Youngjae,” he mumbled. 

Jinyoung and Bambam glared at each other before turning away from each other. That was a problem solved halfway. Yugyeom noticed that Jackson and Jaebum had also stopped yelling but didn’t look happy. Mark gave him a slight nod and Yugyeom retuned one as well. 

There were a few minutes of silence before a car honked outside the dorm. 

“ The manager is here come on,” Jaebum said. 

The members followed him outside and to the manager's van. They were all silent as the car drove to the company. A few of them listened to music while the others looked out the window. Even though it didn’t take long to get to the company it felt like an eternity to Yugyeom. 

Once they got there the members shuffled out of the car disappeared into the building. The choreographer was already in the practice room when the walked inside. If he noticed the tension between the members he did say anything about it. They stretched and went over the songs that they would be practicing and then practice began. 

Yugyeom noticed that the dizziness that he felt this morning was still there and it made him mess up a lot of times as they were dancing. The other members were also messing up but he was messing up more than them. None of them had yelled at him as they had also messed up, but he could tell that they were mad. The choreographer got upset and yelled at them once they were two hours into practice. The dirty looks that were being thrown at didn’t go unnoticed, and the messed up choreography didn’t help their case. 

The choreographer stormed out of the room saying that he would come back when they got their act together. It was quiet in the practice room beside the panting coming from the tired idols. 

Jaebum glared at Jackson saying “ we wouldn’t be in this position if you didn’t mess up so much,” 

“You weren’t much better either,” Jackson snarled. 

“Oh shut up you two you both did poorly,” Mark said. 

Then the two turned to Mark ad started criticizing him. 

“You shouldn’t even say anything. You aren’t good at dancing and you messed up more than us,” Jackson yelled.

In turn, Mark started yelling at them for talking to their elder like that. Eventually, this led to Bambam and Jinyoung to be dragged into the fight. The five of them criticizing each other and blaming what happened on others. Youngjae just looked at Yugyeom with pleading eyes and clung onto his arm. 

Youngjae wasn’t a big fan of yelling even if he could be loud. He just didn’t like it when the members got mad at each other. Yugyeom understood and hugged Youngjae before walking towards the mess of the older members. 

“ Hyungs,” Yugyeom said. None of them noticed him but Bambam who just glared at him. 

Yugyeom tried again and again but he couldn't get their attention so he decided that he would have to yell at them. 

“ HYUNGS,” he screamed. 

All of them looked at him and he shrunk having all eyes on him. 

 He looked at his feet before saying“ Please stop fighting hyungs. We’re all just tired and yes all of us messed up today but we can still  fix it tomorrow.”

He looked at all of his hyungs before him hoping that this would knock some sense into them. It could end up that they forgave each other or they would start on him. He was hoping for the positive outcome but it didn’t seem it would go that way. 

“ Oh look the useless maknae has said something,” Jinyoung said.

“ Shut up Yugyeom you shouldn’t even say anything you aren’t even working enough to say that we messed up. I thought you were supposed to be the main dancer but you were worse than us.” Jaebum said

“ You barely do anything and you are just a burden to us,” Bambam sneered. 

Yugyeom felt his heartbreak with each word his hyungs said. He looked at Mark hoping that he wouldn't say something in his defense but he only glared at him and turned away. Even Mark his kind loving hyung had turned away from him. He felt his heartbreak and tears started leaking from his eyes. 

“Aw look the baby is crying. Honestly Yugyeom you are old enough now to deal with criticism so why are you crying. I don’t even know why we call you the maknae. You never act like one but the moment something doesn’t go your way or you are criticized you start bawling like a baby. What are you a baby or a bad maknae,” Jackson said. 

Yugyeom heard Youngjae gasp from behind him at what Jackson had said. That was one of his biggest insecurities. Yugyeom shrank and started sobbing and turned away from the people that were supposed to be his hyungs. 

He should have been mad but he wasn’t feeling well and he didn’t have any fight in him. He continued to sob and hung his head as he left the room. He didn’t care if someone heard him all he wanted to do was get back to the dorm. He walked slowly thinking about everything that happened in the past 5 minutes. All he could do was cry he didn’t even bother to try to get the negative thoughts out of his head. 

It didn't take him long to get back to the dorm. He walked to his room tears still streaming down his face. He laid down in the dark not bothering to answer his phone that was ringing. It was probably one of s. 

Yugyeom eventually started sobbing after just calming down. All of these voices kept repeating all of what Jackson and the others said. 

Useless, bad maknae, burden, crybaby that’s all he could think of as he laid there. He curled up under his blankets hoping that he could disappear. He wanted the pain to go away, but as much as he wanted the pain to go away it wouldn’t. Afterall life is a beautiful thing and living is painful. He finally fell asleep easily for the first time that week. 

He woke up to darkness and voices outside his room. He didn’t want to see them after the events of that day but he was hungry. Yugyeom decided he would do the only thing that would bring him comfort if he was going to leave the room. He threw on a hoodie after washing up and wrapped a blanket around himself so that all you could see was part of his face. Yugyeom exited his room and heard voices coming from the living room he wasn’t entirely sure he could look at s without crying. He headed straight towards the kitchen and he knew that as he passed by the living room they saw him. None of them had said anything to him and he was happy Yugyeom didn’t feel like talking to them not even Youngjae. 

He walked into the kitchen and grabbed some pizza that was on the counter. They didn’t even want to have dinner he thought as he trudged back to his room. Before he could close the door a hand came and blocked the door. 

“ Yuggie can we talk,” it was Mark. 

Yugyeom said nothing but he opened the door to let Mark in then he shut it behind them. He turned around to see Mark sitting on his bed and with open arms. Yugyeom didn’t want to go to Mark’s arms but they were the ones that always held him when he cried or couldn’t sleep. He gave into that longing and rushed into Mark’s arms and started crying again. 

He felt arms wrap around him, then there was a hand in his hair and one rubbing his back. He continued to cry for a good while before Mark pulled back to look at him. 

“Yuggie I’m so sorry you know I love you right,” Mark said. 

Yugyeom just gave him a nod and sniffled. Mark ran his fingers through Yugyeom’s hair and shushed him while rocking back and forth. Yugyeom finally calmed down and just sniffled here and there. Yugyeom hugged Mark and moved to a more comfortable position in his lap. Even though Yugyeom was taller than Mark he looked so small at that moment. 

“ Yuggie would you like the others to come in here,” Mark asked. Yugyeom jut gave him a nod and wrapped himself back into a cocoon. Soon there was a knock on the door followed by Mark’s voice telling them to come in. The room became brighter as the door opened. Yugyeom looked up for a spilled second to see the other members shuffling into the room. 

The bed dipped from 5 other people sitting on it. There was silence before someone spoke. 

Yugyom heard Jaebum’s voice from inside his cocoon “ Yuggie I’m so sorry I should have known better than to say that to you. We all shouldn’t have said the things we said.”
 
Soon Yugyeom much to his defiance he started crying again. Floods of more apologies started coming from everyone else’s mouths. Hands were pulling back the blanket and revealing his tear-streaked face. The member's hearts broke and they started crying as well. What had started as an apology turned into a crying fest. 

“ Yuggie can you forgive us,” Jackson asked through sniffles. 

Yugyeom looked at his hyungs faces and nodded his head. There were cheers from Bambm and Youngjae as they jumped up. 

“ This calls for a cuddle pile,” Jinyoung said already arranging the blankets. They got to work getting comfortable and squished together on the mattress the best they could.

One by one they settled down and said their goodnights. They talked about what was going to happen the next day and such. Yugyeom fell asleep to the soft voices of his hyungs that night with a smile on his face. 

   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This took so freaking long to write. I've decided I might stop doing part to chapters so after I finish that last one I have that has a second part I'm not going to do anymore that have more than one part to it. I hope you like this I actually put a lot of effort into it. Chapters may be published a bit slower since school has started. I have three projects due on Monday so I kinda see where this year is going. I hope for those of you starting school are having an easy time. Stay safe and have a good day/night.