Blankly, Sehun kept on staring at his hands. The beeping sound from the monitor was the only thing that could be heard inside the room. His hands were full of cuts – they’re bloody – but he’s not bothered by it. He’s not bothered by anything, even by the deep cut on his left arm which was clumsily bandaged. He couldn’t feel the pain. He’s gotten numb. For years of getting ed up, he thought it was the time for him to have a better chapter in his life but look at what happened to him.

“I can’t be friends be someone like you. I just can’t.”

Feeling his heart being squeezed by the second, he shut his eyes. The look in Jongin’s eyes when he said that was different and he’s sure that he really screwed up. He knew that something like this would happen sooner or later but he never knew it would hurt so much.

The door slowly came open and the man in suit entered. He carefully closed the door behind him before bowing to Sehun. The latter did not bother looking at the man. “Boss, you need to get your wounds cleaned up.”

Sehun’s jaws tightened. “How many times do I need to tell you that I’m not your Boss? Stop it because I will never be one.” His voice was low as a growl.

“Boss, I-”

Before he could finish what he was about to say, Sehun was already pinning him against the wall while grabbing his throat. The glint in his eyes was enough to kill someone. He tightened his grip until the man was already gasping for air. Sehun let go and the man fell on his knees, coughing.

Sehun turned to the bed just beside him and stared at Youngho who was breathing slowly with the help of a ventilator. He has warned his friend countless times that he should not make connections with loan sharks but he did not listen. Look at where they are now. Being squeezed in the middle of turf wars of thugs in the area and power struggle between loan sharks could lead to death.

He’s known Youngho for years that’s why he cannot just leave him alone despite fighting with him. He’s the closest to a brother.

“Your father’s waiting for you downstairs,” the man finally spoke as he stood. Sehun almost scoffed when he heard that word – father. He felt like puking. Making up his mind, he headed for the door and the man in suit did not dare to follow him. He knew that a wild soul’s inside Sehun, waiting to be released.

With a stoic expression, he entered the elevator and pressed the button for the ground floor. When the doors closed, he saw his reflection. He was reminded of how he looked like when he was a kid – when he was still lost. His eyes were lifeless. His face was full of cuts and the corner of lips was bloody. After all this time, maybe he’s still trying to find his way.

Flashback

“Sehun, where did you get that?”

Little Sehun looked up at his mother with a surprised expression. He clutched the robot figurine as if his life depended on it. When he did not answer the question, his mother’s expression hardened. Sehun knew that he did something that his mother prohibited him from doing. Mrs. Ji crouched and grabbed the robot from Sehun.

“Sehun, let go.” It was a command.

Sobbing, Sehun let go of his toy. At that age, he never understood why his mother always took the toys he received from his father who was living in Seoul and threw them in the garbage can. “Don’t ever accept anything from him,” his mother stated before walking away.

When they moved to Seoul because of their studies, that’s the time that he realized what’s happening. His mother always tried to hide the bruises on her arms but Sehun would always find a new one. Growing up, hate begun to eat him alive. 

He got into a lot of trouble as if he was trying to find ways to release his pent up rage. He became his mother and his sister’s problem. He was aware of that but he couldn’t find the right mind to stop everything.

When his parents got divorced, he finally took a breather. He started cleaning up his mess. He decided to start anew. His mother and little brother went back to Jeju while he and his sister stayed to continue their studies. It was going smooth at first. He thought and expected that everything’s going to work out for them.

That’s what he thought.

That’s what he expected.

He never knew the storm’s just starting.

End of Flashback

He walked straight to the parking lot when he got out of the building. Scanning the area, he saw a familiar car parked just meters away from the first lamppost. He took wide strides towards it and stood in front of the window when he got there. He opened the door and got in.

A middle-aged man dressed in a fancy suit was seating on the end of the seat. Sehun did not bother greeting him. “How’s Youngho?” his father asked.

“Don’t act like you care. What do you want?”

Mr. Oh smiled, taking Sehun’s rebellious actions as a joke. “You know what I want. Don’t act so hostile. I’m still your father.”

“For the millionth time, I’m not doing it,” Sehun paused as if he was calming himself. “And stop calling yourself my father because you are not and you never will be.”

“You know that my blood runs in your veins and I know that you have the ability to lead my people when I’m gone. I’m doing you a favor. I have cleared your path and have cemented it with gold and silver. I-”

Sehun’s mocking laughter filled the car. “You’re doing me a favor?” he asked when he stopped laughing. “Tell that to my sister. Oh wait, you cannot do that anymore. Why? Because she’s long gone. Whose fault was it again? YOU!!!” With anger etched on his face, Sehun turned to his father. “Now, tell me. You’re still doing me a favor? Because of you, Sehee noona got-” He stopped as anger took over him.

Mr. Oh sighed, as he shut his eyes for some seconds before opening them. “It was a very disappointing event-”

“Don’t even try to empathize,” Sehun butted in, shaking his head before opening the door beside him. When he got out, he slammed the door close. Breathing the same air as him was hard for Sehun. Just as he was about to walk away, Mr. Oh called out his name.

“Sehun, it’s all in the past. Think about your future. Your brother’s just a kid. You need resources to survive in this world.”

Sehun slowly faced his father. “It’s all in the past? That’s easy for you to say because you did not see her pain. You were not there when she was slowly dying. Fo