”I don’t know Nyoung...” Jaebum shifted uncomfortably from his spot on the dorm floor. Jinyoung and Him were currently reviewing their plan for the millionth time that morning, Desperately trying to find some certainty in their very flawed plan before they made the call. 

  ‘The call’ in itself isn’t that important, but it seems every time they call their friends together it never ends well and with their current delimmea jaebum doesn’t expect anything to go well for him. Jaebum was half hoping Jinyoung would back out and call The whole thing off and let jaebum quietly move back home, but knowing his best friend, he’s nothing if not determined. 

  “Trust me.” Jinyoung tried for a weak smile that came out as more of a grimace as he called Yugyeom; Jaebum zoned out throughout their conversation but he was painfully aware of Jinyoungs nervousness as he squeezed his hand tightly more than once throughout their short conversation that honestly felt like hours. 

  Barely an hour passed before there was a faint knock on the door and Jinyoung shot up ready to answer it but Jaebum stopped him, If he was going to do this he needed to do it himself no more hiding behind his best friend. He took a deep breath before standing up, He stood at the door with his shaking hand around the door knob, it wasn’t too late to turn back right? He could just stand here until they gave up and left, But after looking back at Jinyoungs desperate face he knew he couldn’t stall any longer.

  He probably should’ve prepared himself for the inevitable punch Yugyeom threw as soon as he opened the door. But truthfully he didn’t know the younger was capable of a punch that hard, but Jinyoung must’ve because he was there, ready to catch him when he stumbled back.  

  “ you, I wanted to do that.” Jackson glared at Jaebum, this was the first time he’d seen Jackson angry, all of the boys looked so drained and mad Jaebum hates to think he caused all this.

  “What’s so good about you?” Yugyeom scoffed “After all the you put him through youngjae still trusts you, he still cares about you he-“  Yugyeoms voice wavered and Jaebum is sure the younger is close to tears but when he looks up at his eyes Yugyeoms expression instantly hardens , any sign of emotion now gone. At one point in his life Jaebum would’ve reached over and hugged the younger and He probably would’ve accepted Jaebums affection, It stung that he knew he wouldn’t be allowed the same level of closeness they previously had. He wasn’t even sure if he could use the word friend to describe anyone in this room anymore. 

“I know I don’t deserve your trust. Or youngjaes. Just.. let me fix things.” It felt wrong saying youngjaes name in front of them, he didn’t have the right to. Not after hurting him like he did. But he had to try. For youngjaes sake. If he broke down now it’d be Jaebums fault and he couldn’t let that happen. 

  Everyone else clearly looked like they wanted to say something but the deadly glare Jinyoung was giving everyone made them keep their mouth shut and let Jaebum finish.

After he recalled the full sequel of events starting from the night he left to clear his mind, his childhood, and his therapy lessons that he really thought youngjae should get the room was painfully quiet. But Jaebum was done speaking, he said what he had to say and he hoped they would listen, all he could do was look at yugyeom and await his response. 

  “I think... I think we should give it a shot.” Yugyeom saw Jaebums hopeful look and quickly added “I’m not agreeing for you. This is for youngjae. Just for youngjae.”

  “..But this could go really bad. Jaebum talking to him...Trying to get him to go to therapy.. there’s so many flaws in this plan I don’t know if I agree with this..” Bambam pipped in. Yugyeom reached over and patted his back for comfort, something jaebum wish he could do for the younger too. 

  “It won’t go wrong. We can’t let it go wrong. So we’ll do something before jaebum meets youngjae just to prepare him for everything that’s going to happen okay?” There was clearly an uneasy tension in the room but nobody stepped in and opposed the plan so they went with it. 

****

“Are you sure about this gyeom?”

“I don’t know about this...” Bambam shifted his weight back and forth, Tugging at the hem of his sweater every couple minutes. Mark sighed. He didn’t really wanna be here, but he didn’t have a choice either. If he wanted to prove that he was trustworthy and regain Jackson, and everyone else he hurt, trust he had to get ‘involved with the group’. Which meant tagging along on their ‘date’ thing. Mark was definitely opposed to the idea but if he wanted his best friend back this is what he had to go through. This was nothing compared to the damage he’s caused youngjae and Jaebum.

  “You have two seconds to decide if we’re really doing this or I’m ringing the doorbell”

“Okay Jackson wait a sec-“

“Too late.”

  Jackson rang the door bell before anyone had a chance to talk him out of it, including himself. He was nervous about this but the boy that Appeared at the door was definitely worth it. Youngjaes expression gradually got less excited as he looked down the line of boys waiting for him. Jackson wouldn’t lie, the guilty expression on youngjaes face when he looked at him hurt, Jackson desperately hoped he didn’t regret their kiss, but it was nothing compared to the hurt look he gave mark. It was probably the closest youngjae could get to hatred and mark definitely noticed it as he cast his gaze even lower, making sure to never make eye contact with the younger.

  “...What is this?”

“A date ! Get dressed princess.”

 Youngjae froze at the latters response, He didn’t look particularly excited about it, but he didn’t look like he hated it and Jackson was willing to take what he could get.

  “..So where exactly are we going?.”

Youngjae muttered as he walked out of the dorm room ten minutes later, having fixed his messy bed hair and threw on what was obviously the first sweater he saw in his closet, but Jackson couldn’t say he minded it, youngjae could make anything look painfully cute. 

“Where else? Han river of course !”

Jackson gave him a knowing smile, that was youngjaes answer on their ‘Boyfriend tag’ video when asked what his perfect date was. His eyes lit up when he said he’d like to go on a cute date walking along the Han river eating Ice cream and talking about whatever came to mind. Ever since Jackson heard him say it he knew he wanted to do that with youngjae..He hadn’t planned the others tagging along but as long as youngjaes happy So is he, and knowing what’s about to happen with youngjae and jaebum he figures this will be the perfect calm before the storm. 

“Oh yeah..I guess I did mention wanting to go here.” Youngjae avoided his gaze to focus on the ground below him, Specifically a rock he’s been kicking for most of the walk to the river. 

“You did? When?” Yugyeoms Head shot up from the area of dead grass he’s been staring at for ages, this was definitely news to him. He thought he knew everything about youngjae how could something as important as an ideal date slip his mind?

“Of course not, you were too busy hanging out with jungkook.” Youngjae muttered barely above a whisper, yugyeoms sure he wouldn’t have even heard it if he wasn’t currently hyper fixated on youngjae. It almost sounded like youngjaes tone was bitter, but that couldn’t be, why would he be bitter over him being with jungkook? Nothing was making sense and yugyeoms Head was starting to hurt with all this overthinking. Before he even got the chance to open his mouth bambam squealed in delight over finally reaching their destination. Soon everyone was busy listening to bambam whine over his tired legs as youngjae dragged him away to a nearby convenience store to pick up ice cream and snacks. Which left a very awkward jackson, mark and yugyeom waiting. The tension between Jackson and Mark was very obvious to the point where it was making yugyeom anxious, well, that and what youngjae had just said to him and what it could possibly mean. 

  “I really don’t understand why you keep giving me that look, jackson. I’m trying my best!”

“Yeah sure, Mark ! Making no effort to be here and sulking in the back like dead weight is totally making an effort appreciate it, thanks.” 

  Mark scoffed, sure he wasn’t trying his best but what exactly was jackson expecting? Was he supposed to just go up to youngjae like “Hey sort of ruined your life with a stupid post, sorry about that, anyways let’s hang out sometimes!.” He couldn’t even look him in the eye, sure he regrets it but there’s nothing he can do now and Jackson’s arguments really aren’t helping his situation. Yugyeom couldn’t say he was exactly paying attention to whatever they were arguing about but it went on for awhile, it seemed like years before Youngjae and Bambam came back to the group, skipping over with snacks and drinks.

Bambam happily dug in, “I’m starving, I haven’t eaten since Jinyoung Hyung fed me.”

“Bam that was like two hours ago.”

“Okay and what’s your point? I’m a growing boy leave me alone Gyeom.”

“Hm? Jinyoung Hyung?” Youngjae finally took his eyes off of the ice cream he’d been eating “You were with Jinyoung?.”

Yugyeom couldn’t read the expression on his face which wasn’t good, he wasn’t sure if it was a touchy subject or if he’d be accidentally giving something away that Jinyoung didn’t want him to know about..like Jaebums arrival.

“Yeah, we hung out with Jinyoung for a little bit before coming to get you, why? Something wrong?”

  Youngjae quickly dismissed bambams worried look, stating ‘he was fine, just wasn’t expecting jinyoung back so soon.’

“ that Jinyoung couldn’t come but look on the bright side sunshine, I’m here.”

  The boys gagged at Jackson’s cheesy comments but the way youngjaes hand lingered when he went to hit Jackson and his way too loud laugh at his comment bothered yugyeom, but who was he to be jealous? Jackson always flirted with Youngjae it was his thing, he just didn’t like the way his stomach flipped when youngjae flirted back. But now wasn’t the time for jealousy, it was about making youngjae feel better before the inevitable meeting with Jaebum. With all feelings aside Yugyeom grabbed youngjaes hand and dragged him all the way to a bicycle vendor nearby with the other boys following suit, with many complaints from Jackson about who should be the one holding youngjaes hand, which of course, earned lots of protests from youngjae. Not long after the boys were riding bikes along the river and it looked like everyone was having fun, even Mark laughed with them when Bambam tumbled over and knocked his and Jackson’s bike over. 

  The next few hours were spent like this, playing any and every game they could possibly think of. All troubles and problems forgotten for the moment, what was more important was winning whatever game they were playing at the moment because the loser had to buy everyone snacks. It was as if the events that happened over the past few months never happened, they were back to the happy go lucky boys everyone knew and loved. Even if just for a few hours, everyone was happy. 

“Got you-Ack!“ Mark was just about to tag youngjae during a very childish game of tag but ended up tripping sending him and the younger rolling on the ground. The other boys erupted into a fit of giggles while marks face got redder by the moment. 

  “S-Sorry about that” mark said as he dusted himself off and reached his hand out to youngjae who was still laid on the ground. Youngjae gave him a small smile which made mark a lot happier than it should’ve.

  Youngjae glanced up at the sky, which was now a dark orange. 

“It’s getting late, should we head back now?”

  The others mood visibly darkened at the thought of ending probably the only fun they’ll have for weeks but muttered In agreement anyways because they can’t let youngjae know something’s up. 

“I’ll walk with you guys back to the dorms.” Jackson offered. 

“M-Me too! I mean, I’d like to come too.. if you guys don’t mind.” Mark stumbled over his words a bit to the point where he wasn’t sure if the others had understood what he was saying but luckily for him they’d agreed, so the boys made their walk back to the dorms in an exceptionally better mood than before. Although the mood was a lot lighter now mark still wasn’t sure where he stood with them so he quietly trailed behind the others. At least he was until youngjae quietly appeared by his side, humming casually as he walked slower to match marks pace.

“..wouldn’t you prefer to be with your friends?” Mark questioned.

Youngjae laughed, “No, Bambam has a bit of a sugar rush because of all the candy yugyeom was forced to buy him its a little too loud up there, I like walking in the back it’s quiet, it’s nice to be back here with no sound whatsoever gives me time to think you know?”

Mark nodded silently, so he wouldn’t disturb the latters peace. 

  Youngjae playfully shoved his shoulder, “I’m just kidding you know, you can talk. I just wanted to thank you for.. that time. You took me home and you might’ve did some things I don’t really approve of after but I don’t think you’re a bad guy. Sorry I was kind of cold to you before.”

  Mark didn’t know what to say, youngjae was apologizing to him? But he was the one who ruined his life for some petty reason like followers? This was all too much. Everything was too much. Mark didn’t know what to do, Youngjae was too kind and it was making him feel even worse than before- at least if he pretended youngjae was some that hated him he could act like what he was doing was okay but now..now he just couldn’t. The wave of guilt washing over mark right now is doubled once he remembers what’s bound to happen once they reach the dorms. Youngjae didn’t deserve any of it, he’d been nothing but kind even when he was breaking down, even to mark, the reason he’s like that now, its taken so long for him to regain his happiness even if it’s just for a few hours and it’s going to be ruined in the span of seconds once they get to the dorms and he has to face Jaebum. It seemed like a good idea to mark a few hours ago, he didn’t really think much about youngjaes feelings and just wanted to get Jackson off his but now he cares a little too much for his liking. He opens his mouth to speak, wanting to warn youngjae so things can stay like they are now, youngjae happy, mark forgiven and all things well but bambam beats him to it.

“Hey ! What are you doing back there I wasn’t done talking to you.” 

Youngjae gives mark a small smile, silently saying they’d continue this conversation later as he runs to catch up to bambam and the others. Mark gets a bad feeling youngjae is never gonna wanna talk to him again. 

Authors note: I’m back !! Hhh I bet no one missed me huh. I’m sorry I’ve just felt very disconnected with the fandom and this website and my mental health wasn’t the best I’m sorry it’s taken months to update I doubt anyone’s still reading honestly.. but if you are comments are seriously appreciated it’s the only thing giving me motivation to be honest :) I love you all so much.