“This is not funny at all Yewon” Hanseol first words after being silent, listening for Yewon for the whole time. 

“And I’m not stating any joke here” 

“No, you are!”

“I’m not Hanseol. I’m serious here”

Hanseol sigh. He take a breath to calm himself before start talking to Yewon again. 

“Can you please hang on there? Can you please not give up on everything?” 

Yewon bit her own lips, preventing herself from crying in front of that cousin of her. Hanseol words is always right for her, she always listening to the guy’s words whenever she need advice but that time, she just want to shut any of his words. She don’t want to listen any of it because she know, no matter what he told her, no matter how hard she tried, things that she hope for will never happen. It will never happen even if it in her dream. 

“I did. But I guess I’m too weak to hang on there for so long. I just want to fulfill my father’s request. This is the only thing that he hope that I will do. He request nothing other than this”

“But Yewon, we. I mean us? It will never work on us. You know it well right?”
“We can pretend it”

“For how long?! Till forever?! And you will end up like your sister?! Please Yewon! Think! This is not the only way”

Yewon goes silent. There’s no words that she can say because she really have no words to say anymore. So she just listen to Hanseol’s words, hoping that she will find another words to talk to the guy that already a little bit mad in front of her. 

“I know you, Yewon. You are not someone who will give up easily. This is not you. There’s so many way to choose, not only this one. We can’t Yewon”
“But I choose you! I choose you over Eunbi, can’t you see what I’m trying to do?!”

“No I didn’t! I didn’t see anything! The only thing I see is my cousin here is trying to make a stupid decision and I’m trying to stop her!”

“I choose us than Eunbi. Hanseol please understand me. We will be okay someday, of course it will take a time, but I know we will find that happiness together soon. And I know I will actually forget Eunbi because of you”

“Stop being a liar like this Yewon! You are not a liar and you are terrible at it! Don’t try to lie at me, I know you since that I can remember and this is not Kim Yewon that I used to know!”
Yewon silent.

“I just want to help you Yewon. I know how big your love to her, I know your feeling. I know your heart. That tiny heart you have in there is only beating for her and no one else. So please, please don’t pretending like this, please don’t lie like this. I just want you to live happily with your choice in your life, I know it will. Someday. So please"

Tears. 

“I’m tired”
“I’m just tired Hanseol”

“It’s alright to cry, I understand your feeling. I promise I will help you Yewon. Please hang on there. Please don’t ever give up”

There is nothing that she can do instead of crying. She just cry in front of Hanseol, hoping that his words will give a strength for her. She never want to give up, she always try to hang on for her love to Eunbi but remembering Eunbi’s antic around her when she met her at Europe make Yewon felt hopeless to their relationship. She try. She really tried. But what she can do if Eunbi keep insisted. What else she can do if Eunbi already move on from their love story for a long time already. It is her fault after all. 

…………………………………………………..

She unconsciously rubbing at her right wrist and her eyes darted on it. She saw the purple mark that slowly faded day by day. And her mind remember the scene again, the scene where is the last time she look into Eunbi’s eyes. The girl is just right in front of her yet she didn’t do anything. 

“I know it’s you, but why are you lying to me”

Yewon clearly remember how worried Eunbi’s eyes that time. She never forget Eunbi’s tone whenever she feel worry to her, but she just don’t understand. She don’t understand Eunbi. She can’t understand herself too. 

“What did Europe did to you till you change your feeling towards me? Are you even remember my name Eunbi? So for those five years, you are actually in Europe? How?”

She’s talking alone as she still rubbing her wounded right wrist slowly. Her mind is full by thinking only about Eunbi, she is just curious, what would happen to them if they didn’t argue five years ago. Will they still in relationship? Just because that little misunderstanding between them, everything was fall apart. 

“I miss you”

“Yewon?”

Yewon wipe her tears away before take a look at her sister that stand not far from her room door. She let out a fake smile, hoping that Sojung didn’t see her tears just now. 

“Unnie?”

“Can I come in?” Sojung ask as she take a few steps towards Yewon.

“You already in tho. Why unnie?”

Yewon ask, but Sojung didn’t say any words and just give a hug to her. The sudden hug form her sister make Yewon want to cry again, she really want to tell her unnie everything but she know it will not make any different. So she just hug Sojung tightly, hiding her face on the older girl chest for the long that she want. 

Sojung who understand everything just Yewon hug her. Sojung miss her, she really want to give a comfort to her one and only sister but as for that time, the only right thing to do is to be silent, to give a space to the younger girl, to give Yewon a time to make herself comfortable in her arms. 

“Yewon.”

“Hmm?”

“Are you sure about your decision?” Sojung ask carefully, still rubbing the younger girl’s back softly and instead of answering Sojung’s question, Yewon just nood weakly, still refuse to look at Sojung’s eyes. 

“But I disagree with that Yewon. You can’t give up” Sojung say again and this time Yewon raised her head and look at Sojung straightly. 

“Why? Why would you disagree? What else I can do than agreeing to this plan?” 

Yewon ask bravely, looking straightly into her sister’s eyes. 

“I don’t want you to give up. I don’t want you to end up like me Yewon. I don’t want you to be unhappy for the rest of your life, please don’t take a wrong step dear, you can’t be like me. You once said to me that you never want to follow my path, so just think about this again Yewon”

“But I have to unnie and this is my last decision. It’s been a years that I keep delaying this and this time, I can’t unnie. Don’t worry, for the mean time I believe I will be happy. Thi—this is what you and father planned right? I have to Unnie.” Yewon answer with her trembling lips. She is keeping her head low, not wanting Sojung to see her lying eyes. 

“But Yew—“

“Unnie, can we just talk tomorrow? I’m tired. Please” Yewon cut her sister words. She just can’t let Sojung be with her for that long, because she know if Sojung keep insisted, Yewon might end up crying in front of her and she really don’t want that to happen. 

Sojung who can’t say anything being pushed weakly by the younger girl. She didn’t fight back, she didn’t ask Yewon to stop nor say any words to let herself in Yewon’s room. She understand Yewon, she know the younger girl’s feeling more than anyone else. She experience it before and she know how much it’s hurts, even herself can’t bear the pain. She can’t let her one and only younger sister feel the same pain as her.  Because she know, the pain is unbearable. She can’t let her. 

‘I will help you Yewon. I promise’

………………………………………………………………………………………

It is almost four hour Yuju sat on the couch in the living room and it is also a million times that she keep spare glance at Yerin who didn’t say any words to her. The girl who she used to see her eye smile every single day, right now didn’t even smile for a few days already. She really want to approach her and ask about her problem but Yuju still doesn’t have a courage even to ask if she is okay or not. But she is Yuju, she don’t want to give up and she can’t handle herself ignoring someone who seem to have a problem behind, or in the other words, she don’t want to see Yerin being sad. So she try, even though she know Yerin will still ignore her. Yuju stand up from the couch and after see that Yerin didn’t even react to her, she left and just go out from the house with a heavy sigh. 

“Y—yerin” Yuju approach Yerin who still sit on the couch after she left for an hour with a plastic bag that on her hand. It is full with sweet snacks and few Yerin’s favourite things. 

“Hmm?” 

“I—I bought an ice cream for you. It’s all your favorite flavor” 

“Thank you but, I don’t really want to eat any sweet things right now”

“O—okay. I—I will keep this for you, if you want to have it, just take it inside the refrigerator okay?” Yuju say, still with her friendly tone and smile on her face. Instead of answering Yuju, Yerin just let out a sigh didn’t even look at Yuju who already feel hurt by that. 

“Do you have any problem Yerin?” 

“No I don’t” 

“You definitely are. I—if you don’t mind, you can share it with me. I’m good listening to other people”
It is a few time already but Yerin still ignoring her and Yuju still trying to make a conversation. Even though she know that Yerin will never listen to her, Yuju try her best to make Yerin feel better and hoping Yerin will be more open to her. 

Four years live with Yerin, it can be count how many times she talked to Yerin alone. With just two of them. Yuju always want to be like Sinb, she want to be like Sinb so she know how it feels being close to Yerin. How it is feel talked nonsense to Yerin. She is not jealous at all, it’s just she wish she can be more open and friendly, so she can talk freely to Yerin. It is been a long time since she wish she can be close to Yerin, but she always fail. Yerin never see her as a close friend, Yerin barely talk to her, spend time alone with her. Sometime, Yuju is just wondered, if Yerin ever remember her name. At least. 

“Yuju” Yerin suddenly say a words and what makes Yuju startled and shocked even more, Yerin just call her and say her name.

“Y—yeah?” Yuju respond, still struggling herself for not being excited in front of Yerin. 

“Do you have any problem with Chloe?” 

“Huh? C—Chloe? Are you asking ab—about her?”

“Yeah, do you have any problem with her? What is happened actually? I heard you guys argued that night, and I really heard everything. Why? What is wrong? What actually make Chloe sad?” 
Yuju let out a bitterly smile.

‘It is always about Chloe. What do you expect Yuju? Stop day dreaming’

“S—so you being quite like because of Chloe?” 

“No, it’s just—just. I don’t want to see her being sad. I saw she cried few times already in this week. I miss her laugh, I just want she know that I’m always be there for her whenever she need someone to lean on, but—did Chloe really love her? Did she really love her that much? And, Am I really don’t have any chance to be in her heart?” Yerin ask innocently. 

Yuju loss at words. But she can’t let herself being silent again. She let out a small smile and look at Yerin dearly.

 
“Yewon is her past love. Even though I’ve known Chloe for a long time, I still didn’t know about her heart. They already broke up for a long time ago and I’m not really sure about it. But, Yerin you can’t give up. If you really love Chloe, you c—can’t give up, who know? One day Chloe will op—open her heart for you”

“Really?! Do I actually have a chance?!”

“Everyone have a chance. I know and I saw how close two of you, I saw how happy Chloe whenever she spend times with you. Maybe now she still confuse about her own feeling, but who know the future right?”

“It’s okay, she is Chloe. Someone who I love so much, I don’t mind waiting for her, I will always here waiting for her” 

Yuju smile to Yerin. Her lips automatically smile after saw Yerin’s eye smile again. Finally she can see Yerin’s smile again. Her heart twisted inside of her but she is still happy, because Yerin is in front of her, smiling happily and there’s nothing good other than that. 

’Maybe. It’s me who don’t even have a slightly chance’ 

She smile. Trying to hide her tears that start falling.

new update !! 

please enjoy and thank you for lstill reading ;)