“It must be hard for you isn't?"

Sinb take a look at Namjoon who suddenly ask her a question that she didn't understand. It is Namjoon first words after thirty minutes in silent ride. Both of them feel tired and exhausted from fishing till make them don't really have a strength to have any conversation.

"What do you mean?" Sinb ask back

"You've been keeping your feeling for all those years"
"I--i'm not. It's okay for me. Of course it is hurt me at the mean time, but i believe it will be alright in the end" 

Sinb tighten her fist. Wanting to prevent herself from breaking down in front of Namjoon. Deep inside her heart, hoping that Namjoon will stop asking her any question. Deep inside her, she just want Namjoon to stop talking. Namjoon who can see the younger girl start feeling uneasy, trying to stop himself from asking anything but he just want to say the things that he want to say to her.

"I know you still love her. The only thing i hope for you is to never give up on your feeling. Whatever it takes, please fight for it and dont ever give up on her" 

"I should just let her be without me" 
"If you being like this, nothing will change. Come on, at least you should try it. If you just being like this, she will really end up with someone else, and that person is not you"

A few drop tears falling down from Sinb eyes slowly. Namjoon's words make her touched a little. Namjoon's words make Sinb want to try. At least, she want to try. She don't want to be apart with Yewon anymore. She's tired being sad, she's tired keeping her feeling for the whole time. But how can she try if everything already messed up?
Sinb is into her deep thought, until she didnt even realise the car stop right in front of the house.

"If Yewon know the truth, she will never want to see me again"
"Telling her truth is still better than keeping all of that by yourself. Explain to her, i believe Yewon will understand"
"Did Sojung unnie told you?" 

Namjoon nod as he look straight into Sinb's eyes

"She tell me everything.Well, that is Sojung"
Sinb smile when she saw Namjoon's dimple. She just realise it that whenever Namjoon talked about Sojung, Namjoon always smile and his dimple make it more charming that it is. 

"Oppa, i have a questions" 
"Uhmm, your marriage with Sojung unnie also arranged married isn't? How did you felt that time? Knowing that you will get married with someone that you don't expect to be your wife?" 

"Me? I was mad ofcourse. I was mad to everyone, including Sojung. But yeah, after spending time with her,.lived with her, i realise that she also hate me. She hate me more than anything. Sojung--" 
"Hesh, Sojung unnie love you oppa. What are you saying?" 
"Yeah . I know that. But that is the truth, Sojung hate me more than she hate the bugs. Can you imagine it? Even though she hate bugs, she hate me more. And I was fully annoyed knowing that! How come my standard is lower than bugs!"

Sinb accidently chuckle. Actually she has been trying to hold her laughter but fail.
"I believe it was before. Isn't? Both of you love each other now. Right?"

"Ye--yeah. I guess so—we are here, you come inside first, I need to answer this call" Namjoon say as he answering the call.
"Sure”

............,........

Sinb step into the house slowly and close the door silently. She take a look around the house and start thinking again, try to remember evrything before she stepped out from the house two hour ago. The lights and televisyen was on, and the room door where she stayed also open widely. 

"Sojung unnie?" 

Silent. 
And her phone is ringing loudly make Sinb pick it up without even waiting for it. 

"Unni--"
"Sinb, can you please take a look inside the refrigerator? Is there any eggs and sauces in there? Or anything edible?"

"Hu--h . Wa--wait" Sinb say as she run to the kitchen open the refrigerator.
"There's no eggs in here and only got a bottle of mayonise"

"Ahh, thankfully I ask you. Alright"
"Wait Unnie! Did you come back home just now?" 
"Lol what are you talking about? I’m driving right now and on my way to supermarket after this, why?"
"Really? Then who--"

Sinb froze at her place right after she close the refrigerator and turn around. She widened her eyes as she she put her hands down, forget to hang up Sojung who still on the line. 

"Ye--yewon ah? Wh--what are you doi--doing he--here?" 

"YOU--What are YOU doing in my sister's house?!" Instead of answering, Yewon ask Sinb the same question. Her eyes start turning red, tears just falling out from her eyes without even she realise it. 
"Yewon i--" 
"Don't call my name! Get out from this house now!" 
"Yewon--i--" 
"I said get out!!
"Yewon--" 
"I said don't call my name with those liar mouth you had!! Get out from here before i call the police!!"

Sinb goes silent right after Yewon shout at her. Her heart start bleeding as her tears wanting to come out but she try to hold it in. With a wounded heart, Sinb take a slow steps towards the door. She can’t look Yewon into her eyes because she don’t have a courage. She just never have a thought that she will meet Yewon like this and listen to Yewon harsh tone towards her. 

“I—I’m sorry Yewon” Sinb say slowly but loud enough to make Yewon heard her. 

“Get out and don’t ever appear in front of my face or any of my family again” Cold. 

“I—I will, I’m so—“

“You are not going to anywhere, Sinb you stay here” Namjoon who suddenly appear in front of the main door startled both the girls and yet Yewon still need an explanation. 

“Oppa—“

“Nothing can be done if you two doesn’t want to talk at first. This is not the way, Sinb. If you have something to explain to Yewon then explain to her. And Yewon, you should at least listen to her, not just shut her out without listened to any of her words” 

“I don’t want to hear any of her excuse! I just want her to disappear forever at least in front of my eyes!” 

“Listen to what she to say first Yewon. Don’t just be like this, you the one who will regret it later if you being like this”

“I have heard enough Oppa! I don’t need any explanation! She is a snake! Liar. I don’t want to listen to any of her words because she is the biggest liar and two faces human I ever met!”

Her tears that she try to keep in is finally falling. She try, she try not to cry at the time like that but, Yewon’s words is hurting her. For her, Yewon’s words is true after all. But still, hearing that kind of words from Yewon itself hurt her even more. 

“You are not being yourself Yewon. This is not Yewon that I knew”

“You don’t even know your own wife, so don’t act like you know me when you don’t even know Sojung unnie well” 

“Yewon stop it. This is all my fault, it’s nothing to do with RM oppa or Sojung unnie” Sinb say, wanting to let Yewon realize her words towards the man just now. Namjoon is the kindest man she ever met, and to listen that kind of words towards Namjoon, Sinb know she can’t just let herself being quite for all the time.

“Who do you think you are to stop me?!
“I just—I—it’s all my fault—i—“
“Yes! It’s all your fault! Then get out from here! Before I kick you out! What you doing here actually?! Are you in relationship with him?! Are this Namjoon cheating on my unnie and date you instead!? Tch—“

“Enough is enough kid! What the are you saying?!—I have heard enough! Follow me! Now!”

“But oppa—“

“Sinb! Yewon! I said now!” Namjoon shout again when he realize that none of the younger girls want to move from their standing place.
 
Silent. Everyone goes silent. No one dare let out any words. Sinb and Yewon follow Namjoon into the room where Sinb has stayed, silently. It is everyone first time, neither Sinb, Yewon, Namjoon. It is SInb first time seeing Namjoon goes mad like that. Namjoon in front of her, is totally different from Namjoon that she know thirty minutes before. 

Many years knowing Namjoon, it is really first time for Yewon to heard Namjoon shout like that. Even though she don’t really know Namjoon well, but she know, Namjoon is a gentle person she ever met. Yewon take a deep breathe, and face palm herself internally realizing that she has gone too far just now. 

Same goes to him too. In his life, it is his first time to raise his voice to girl that younger than him. He tend to treat everyone well, especially girl. He never want to be harsh, but he just think what he need to do, at least that time. For him, both Yewon and Sinb really need a help, and he can’t bear to listen to Yewon’s words accusing him with any kind of nonsense thing. 

“You two better talk each other or else I will never open this door for you! Talk everything out! Figure out everything! Listen to each other explanation first, don’t just jump into conclusion! And don’t shout to each other, talk properly! I’m seriously not gonna open this door for you! Not even Sojung can stop me! Kids will never listen!” 

Namjoon’s last words before he slam the door hard and lock it from outside. Both Yewon and Sinb just startled from it and stand in silent awkward for the whole time. They can barely heard Sojung’s faint voice from outside. 

“What the heck are you doing to them inside?"

“Relax, I just want them talk to each other”

“By locking them inside?!” 

“Well, yeah I have to. Your sister is just like you shouting and raising her voice to everyone, and someone is about to get kick out from this house before. So I just did what I have to” 

“You are crazy, Namjoon!” 

“They will be okay. Now I’m hungry, let’s go out and get some food. The girls might be hungry in there if we didn’t get them food. Let’s go”

“Yah! Oppa!”.
“Come on, the kids will be okay. Come on”
“Sojung”

“Let me just talk to them for a while”
“I’m not gonna open that door”
“I know”

“Hey, Sinb, please don’t keep it by yourself anymore okay? Just talk to Yewon. And Yewon dear please listen to Sinb first. Unnie will go out for a while okay?"

………………………………………………………………………………………………………

An awkward silent engulfing two of them in that room. One is sit at the end of bed while the other is just standing awkward not far from the door. Both is being silent, Sinb who really have a lot to say to Yewon is lost a words. She’s been thinking if it’s really a good idea to talk to Yewon or not. At that point, it make Sinb helplessly, it makes her to give up and just let Yewon hate her forever even though she will never want that. 

“Yewon—“

“Please just don’t” It was the only words that Yewon say for the whole time in that room. 

No matter how struggle Sinb try to talk to her, Yewon keep shutting her up. She don’t want to listen to her words. She is just afraid. She is scare if she let Sinb to explain to her, she will get hurt. Whatever it is,Yewon don’t want to listen to any, because she is scare. Yewon is just scare but, she saw how desperate Sinb when she saw her eyes just now. Even though they haven’t meet for a long time, Yewon still remember Sinb’s eyes whenever she try to tell something important. She know it well, whenever Sinb lie about something, whenever Sinb hate about something. She still remember everything about her. It is just, Yewon is too afraid to know about the reality, she afraid to know about the truth behind the story that her father told her.  

Their awkward silent ended when Yewon who start talking to Sinb who hugging her knees at the room corner.

“Aren’t—aren’t you cold sitting there?”
“I—I'm okay”

Silent. 

Fee minutes after that Yewon stand up from the bed and approach Sinb who still hugging her knees at the corner. She sigh as she take a sit beside Sinb who already let out a silent tears. Both being silent as time keep slipping by. 

"Yewon-ah--I'm sorry--i--" 
"What sorry"
"I--i'm--" 
"Whatever it is, I just dont want to listen to it. It's hurt Sinb. It's hurt me." Yewon say. Dissapointed and sad.  

And Sinb went silent, sealing her lips tightly as she try not to let out her tears. Yewon words claiming that she really hurts, make Sinb hate to herself even more.

"You know what?, I came to Europe months ago not because i knew you were there, not because i want to search for you and meet you again. I went there because i want to cure my lonely heart that has been longing for you for those years. It--it's hurt Sinb-ah. It is really hurt knowing that you left me just like that. I know it's my fault, it was my ego that hold--hold me back from everything.It--it's jus--just--i--" 

Yewon is crying so hard make herself can't say anything. Sinb really want to hug Yewon to give some comfort but knowing the main reason why Yewon being like that make Sinb retreat her hand from Yewon. 

"I'm--I'm sorry Yewon"

"I miss you like a crazy person. Every day for all those years i was hoping that i can find you and be with you aga--again. But where were you?! Why were you give up to come to me back then?! Why you didn't try hard to keep our relationship before?! You--you told me, you pro--promise me that you will never want to break apart with me but what did you do?!

"I--i--" 

"You left me! You broke your promise! You promised me that you will never want to let me go, but--but--just why?"

"I'm sorry" The only words that Sinb can say. She already let ouf her tears silently, blaming herself for everything that happened to them.

"You know why i pick Europe out of all? It's because of you!I--i choose Europe because my mind and my heart remembered you! You love Europe and you promised me that you want to bring me there one day. And"

"And you know what? I never exoect that i will met you there again. I--i thought i was crazy but i'm not. I thought i'm thinking too much about you till make me saw you there but i'm not. You were really there. You know h--how happy my heart that time? How i want to run to you and say that i was really sorry for you.I ev--i even thought that you are my fate. And i never want to let you go again"

"But--but what did you do?--You pretending that it wasnt you, you told me to back off from your life forever, even though i--even though how much i begged you that time. And now? why are you suddenly comeback Sinb? Why dont you just stay there and dont comeback here again?, Wh--why are you coming back?".

Silent. Only sobbing sound from both can be heard. 

"I'm sorry--i thought you will be better without me, i--i just want the best for you" Sinb say slowly.
"You said that but why are you suddenly appear in front of my eyes? Why Sinb?"

Silent. 

"Sinb,i'm asking you" Yewon ask again, trying to hold her anger seeing Sinb who seems didnt want to answer her any. 
"I--i just want to apologize to you, for hurting you, for everything"

Tears come out from Sinb again. Unstoppable. Seems she can't say anything to Yewon anymore. She can't tell Yewon the truth that in fact she want to be with Yewon again. 

"I'm ge--i'm getting married soon. Before you go back to Europe, i want you at least to attend one of my happiest day in my life. Can--can you at least do that?"

Yewon's words make Sinb wreck inside. Listening to that make Sinb lose hope and want to just kill herself forever. If only she can follow her selfish heart, she just want to take Yewon's hand tightly and run away with her. But she know, she can't. The person that she love the most will get marry with someone that not her. Sinb's tears seems really can't stop. She is busy crying her heart silently didn't even realise that Yewon also crying hard beside her.

"Cong--congratulations.I really wish your happiness with him" The only words that Sinb can say.

"Thank you. I will be happy with him"

Silent. 

Both still lost in their own monologue with sitting next to each other.

"You--you can always lean on my shoulder if you want. At least let me comfort you even just for the last--for the last time" Sinb say as she look at Yewon hopefully. That is what she really can do that time. She just want Yewon to stop crying because of her. For Sinb, Yewon didnt deserve all those tears, she just want Yewon to be happy.

"Why would i lean on you when all of this happen because of you?" Yewon ask coldly, didnt even spare a glace to Sinb who look at her from the side.

Sinb lost words again. Feel discourage after heard Yewon's cold words. And tears start coming out again.

"I'--i'm really sorry"

It was a silent moment when Sinb can feel a pair of arms wrapping her left arm softly before Yewon lean on her shoulder. There's no words can be heard from the two but it is clearly enough that both of them really miss each other. Only Sinb's sob can be heard in the mean time even though she has been trying to hold it back. .

"Why did you do that Sinb?" Yewon start asking. Clearly. With tone that full .of dissapointment,yet Sinb didn't really get it. 

"Wh--what do you mean?" 

"I'm really afraid to know the answer for this because i'm scare that your answer will hurt me. But, i--i just want to know why? It makes me curious for all those years that we have spent together before" Yewon ask carefully, slowly. 

"I--i--"

"Are you really that kind of person Sinb? Are you really be my friend back then only because of money that my family have? Are you even love me for real  after those time that we spent together?" Or you only used me to get what you want from me?"

"I'm really afraid to ask you this. I dont really want to know yet, i'm really curious. Am I really blinded by my love for you till i didnt really saw that?"

"Yewon--i--"

"Can you not answer that? I--i'm scare. I'm scare if all of what i said is true. I'm afraid that if all of that is true, the i have been one sided love for all those time and you only used me. I'm scare. So can you just not answer that?"

"But--"

"I feel betrayed. I love you will all my heart but you seems never love me for real--"
"But i really love you Yewon. I really love--"
"Did your love for me have a value? How much did you love me? 1 thousand won? 5 thosand won? or five hundred thousand million won?"

Sind widened her eyes, shocking at Yewon's question as she stunned herself, losing every word that she want to say to Yewon. Yewon raise her head that resting on Sinb shoulder, staring into Sinb's eyes waiting for an answer that she really afraid to know. 

"Why are you quite? Tell me Sinb. Did you really sold our love for that five thousand hundred million won? Only that, you only love me that much?" Yewon ask again more like begging. She desperate to know, she desperate want to know the exact reason, even though she really afraid to know Sinb's answer. She can't imagine anything about it. She is not ready to feel betrayed by the person that she love the most, she can't bear herself hating on Sinb if she ever know the answer. 

"I'm--I'm sorry Yewon"  Sinb answer slowly. 

"So you really did?! Did you?!"

"I--i have no--i really have no choice" Sinb asnwer make Yewon let go of her hand that wrapping onto Sinb's arms. She just can't accept the answer. She feel betrayed and she regret for asking Sinb to answer her. Yewon start distancing herself from Sinb before standing up, wanting to be away from the blonde girl. 

"Yewon--.

"I don't want to listen to any of your words anymore. Please just don't talk to me. Please. If Sojung unnie and RM oppa asked us, i beg you to pretend that we already okay. Assure them that we already talk to each and we settle everything already. Please do me this favor. Please just pretend it. I beg you" 

Yewon beg as she take a step away leaving Sinb that sitting at the room corner alone. Yewon want to wailing out loud but she refuse to do it. Everything that she heard make her hurt enough, she don't want to listen more. she can't take it anymorr.

hi~~~~ 

actually i have been thinking for these past days, what ending should i gave to this story? should i just let them being apart? or should i make it a happy ending?? 

btw thank you for stil reading and waiting .. i really appreaciate it very much.