Krystal stared down at her phone while Jong In stared out at the Han River saying something about the lights reflecting off the water. 

What am I supposed to do with this? she wondered, reading and rereading Amber's message. It wasn't an apology, not really. It wasn't even really the beginning of a conversation. It was words. A bunch of words all jumbled together, part attempt at an explanation and part...what? What did she want to say? Why was everything with Amber always so confusing?!

"Soojung?" 

She jerked her head up and blinked at the boy beside her. "What?" 

"I asked you if something was wrong. You look upset. Did you get bad news?" he asked with concern. 

Krystal shook her head, tucking a long strand of hair behind her ear. 

"No. Nothing's wrong. I'm just...I don't think I'm in the mood for a date tonight. Do you think you could take me home? Plus, you have a concert coming up right? You should be resting rather than hanging with me all hours of the night." 

Jong In sighed. They barely got to see one another and when they did one or both of them were distracted or counting the short time between the time they had together and the time they needed to be back on their schedule, rather for their groups or their solo activities. 

"You're right. I hate that you're right. I feel like I never get to see you." 

Krystal nodded in complete understanding. This was one of the reasons she and Amber had planned on being casual. There was never any time for something real. Why did I have to insist on making things more than they were? She asked herself for the thousandth time while she chewed on her lower lip. 

"Yeah...yeah..." 

"It makes it especially hard when I care about you so much." 

The young, female singer couldn't help but cringe. She could see it in his eyes, his feelings for her and she hoped to God he couldn't see how much her feelings didn't measure up. Although some days...she wished that he could. She wanted this to be over but didn't know how to end it without hurting him or remaining friends. Washing years of friendship down the drain just because she'd been foolish seemed doubly hard, especially when she was in a similar situation with Amber and the situation with Kai was brought on by her rebounding from that. 

Am I really going to lose two friends just because I can't control my heart? she wondered. 

"Jong In..." she started hesitantly, keeping her eyes on her lap because she found it impossible to look at him. "I...I've been going over this and over this in my mind trying to think of a good way to tell you..." 

"Yeah?" He asked nervously. 

"I was confused." 

"About what?" 

She compressed her lips and gestured with her hand between them. "Us. I was confused about us. I was upset and you were there and I thought maybe I could care about you the way you care about me, but..."

His hand landed on her thigh, causing her to glance at him. "We've been seeing each other for months now!" he gasped. "I was planning to propose if things continued to go well." 

Her brows shot up to her hairline. "Propose?! I'm not even twenty-two yet!" 

"Well, I wasn't going to propose tomorrow," he said incredulously. "Perhaps we could date a few years and-"

"Years?!" 

"And maybe after we-" 

"I already know," she said quickly. She found the courage to look him directly in the eyes. "I'm sorry, Jong In," she whispered, watching his expression fall.

"But-" 

"Can you just take me home?" she continued quietly. She wasn't going to change her mind. He wasn't for her and she wasn't for him. She hoped they could continue to be friends after this. 

"After everything we went through when we announced our relationship," he murmured, starting the car. 

Krystal felt a tear slip down her cheek. It had been hard, as well as the process of letting their company know and assuring them they wouldn't cause any problems with their relationship. Barely a few weeks in and here she was, already breaking up with him. What would her fans think of her? What would his fans think of her?

She pressed her face into her hands, feeling hopeless and even more scared when she realized she would be seeing Amber again in a few weeks whether she was ready to or not. 

"It's all such a mess." 

Krystal's eyes tracked Amber in the mirror as she walked back and forth collecting her outfits for the stage, getting her hair and makeup done, working off nervous energy chatting with the staff. 

Really? Really, Amber? 

Amber and Luna had arrived in Paris a short time after her, then they'd had a few moments to themselves to roam around then practice. No time for talk, but even if there had been, it seemed Amber wouldn't chat with her. At least about nothing serious. 

I'm not doing this again, Krystal promised herself.  I'm not going to force you to talk or to feel something that you don't, but what the hell was that text message?!

She'd been worrying over it for weeks, while apparently, Amber had been going about her life as usual. So she tried her best to act nonchalant as well. When Amber touched her or grazed past her or smiled at her, she tried her best not to show how her heart raced. When Amber spoke to her, she tried not to smile automatically and lean into her words. When Amber reached a hand to help her down the stairs after they performed, she tried her best not to let her fingers linger once they reached the bottom of the steps. 

I don't know if I want you or need you or love, I just know that...you...you make me feel so many things I never thought I would, she thought, watching Amber untuck her white button-up shirt from her pants, slowly undoing the buttons. Krystal swallowed hard, suddenly dry. 

The older girl tossed the shirt over a rack, now wearing nothing but her dark slacks, a white tank, and her tattoos scrawling up her arm. 

Krystal crossed her legs, amazed she could be so easily. She sighed at how her body didn't listen to her mind when it came to Amber. Her body was screaming at her to go to Amber's hotel room later that night to trace her fingers up the ink on her skin, while her mind was screaming at her about how Amber hardly reciprocated and always left her feeling there was something slightly wrong. 

She closed her eyes firmly, struggling with her thoughts until she felt hands land on her shoulder. Her eyes snapped open to find Amber standing over her slightly, tan hands cupping her shoulders, an unusual expression on her face as she looked at Krystal's reflection. 

Subtly she brushed her thumb over the skin beneath Krystal's hanging hair, causing the younger girl to gasp and clench her thighs. 

"What are you doing?" she hissed in a whisper. 

Amber snatched her hands away. "Sorry. I wasn't thinking. I'll see you later, okay?" 

And before Krystal could stop her, she grabbed up her bag and ducked out of the room. 

Krystal felt a sob rising in and quickly hid her face in her hands before anyone could see how much of a mess Amber left her in.