“You've lost weight” JiYong commented, watching as Seungri tightened his belt around his once well fitting jeans. JiYong had noticed how the youngers once full cheeks were hollowing in and how his eyes were set deeper into his face, all baby fat lost with the horrible procedure that Seungri underwent three times a week.

“I know” Seungri sighed, looking around for something. “I've gone down two sizes in clothing”. JiYong frowned as Seungri pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. JiYong picked the brown sued jacked up from the bed and handed it to him wordlessly. Seungri thanked him and swung it around his shoulders. JiYong knew that his memory capacity was receding along with his weight.

And JiYong found it so terribly sad, watching Seungri go about with his daily life was so much different. He struggled with the smallest tasks, thing tying shoelaces had become a challenge as his fingers shook so much and even remembering where he had placed his phone a few seconds prior was a trial. Seungri was dying, JiYong knew that. But he still held onto the hope that the chemo was working, and that in a few months, Seungri would be okay. But the fact he was getting treatment didn't change the fact that he was dying.

“Come on, we don’t want to be late to the chemo session” Seungri smiled lightly, grabbing his scarf from the rack in the hallway. JiYong followed behind and on a whim, clasped the others fingers in his own, swinging their arms between them as they walked down to the car park. Jiyong drove and Seungri entertained himself by looking at the passers by on the street, Seoul was busy at the moment, the weather was just starting to warm up, it was still below ten degrees but it was much better than the minus numbers they had been experiencing in the past few weeks. JiYong drove into the private part of the car park and parked before breathing heavily and turning to the other person in the car.

“You ready?” he asked, reaching across to clasp the others fingers in his own. Seungri merely nodded nervously, JiYong knew how much he hated the chemo sessions, he had always hated needles and three hours of constant pain from a needle was not exactly very desired by the maknae. JiYong reached across and straightened the other’s hat, letting his hand linger more than necessary on his cheek before dropping it to his lap. Seungri shifted uncomfortably and bit his lip nervously. “You’re  so very beautiful” JiYong said off handedly, startling the younger and Seungri closed his eyes and took a shaky breathe.

“Don’t say things like that when you know they aren’t true” JiYong recoiled at his words.

“You are beautiful” he said again, clutching at the others shoulders.

“I’m bald, I’m ing bald, I mean I know I was never the most attractive in Bigbang but now I look hideous” Seungri sniffed uncomfortably when JiYong just gaped at him in shock, unable to comprehend his words.

“You’re beautiful, and I love-” he took a shaky breath before speaking again “I love you Lee Seunghyun.” Seungri blanched at the words.

“Don’t say things like that JiYong, don’t say things that you don’t mean” he unloosed his seat belt fully and hurried out of the car. JiYong stared after him in shock and undid his own seat belt before pulling himself out of the driver's seat and locking the car before ensuing the younger.

He caught up with Seungri and gently tugged on his arm so that he was facing him, seeing that his maknae had tears in his eyes, he pulled Seungri into a tight hug and pressed his face into his neck. “I meant it Seungri, I love you” he confessed.

“You can’t” Seungri said hysterically “you can’t JiYong, you’ll only get hurt” he batted his fists on JiYong’s chest in anger. “What happens when something happens to me? What would you do if I died?” Jiyong caved in at the words and he held the younger even closer, letting him sob into his shirt.