when we tried it, we were a fire with no smoke

ㅡ

Staying in his bed for days surely wasn’t the smartest thing to do, but he didn’t really care about ‘smart‘ stuff at all. He just loved the feeling of staying in his bed, somewhere he could still feel some kind of warmth. He had lost track of time days ago. He was sure his friends had contacted him several times. Hell, he even knew a few had been at his door, banging against it, telling him to open the ing door. But, he didn’t, he couldn’t. He had no strength to leave his bed and, to be honest, he didn’t want to see them ‘cause they remembered him of Hoseok. Well, everything remembered him of Hoseok, especially his bed since they spent so much time in it cuddling for hours, but the warmth was what made it bearable. At one point Yoongi had even called: ‘I’ll call the police, if you won’t open that ty excuse of a door!’ But Namjoon knew the older wouldn’t call the cops. He was pretty sure Yoongi knew he hid himself from the world because Hoseok had left him. Seokjin had been there several times as well, telling him not to forget about eating properly and that he would be there for him if he wanted to talk. Namjoon never responded to anyone.

All he could do, all he wanted to do was to live in the memories he had of the great time he had spent with Hoseok. Only the memories managed to draw little smiles onto his face. He lost himself in the memories and every time he opened his eyes he was still caught in them.

He remembered the weeks after they’ve got together, it surely had been the best time of his life. After that one evening, when Namjoon had confessed his love to Hoseok through those lyrics, they had spent almost all their free time together. It had been a blessing to the both of them. Hoseok had been able to forget about his demons and all the things that depressed him, while Namjoon had finally been able to work on his music the way he had always wanted to. Hoseok had been his muse, the reason his passion for music grew with every passing day. Hoseok had been his passion. Not only that, from that day on, he had let Hoseok read all his lyrics, he also had let Hoseok help him with some songs, composing and arranging them. Every single time he had had to face a deadlock Hoseok had been right there beside him, helping him, even with his lyrics that were basically his soul. One reason more why he had considered Hoseok as a part of himself, Hoseok had been able to read him like an open book, knew about all his fe