i starve my heart of touch & time

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He had no idea how much time passed by. He didn't know if it had been days or already week, he didn't even care. He lost track of time as he was staying in his bed, his phone shut off and no other possibility to check on time left in his bedroom. The clock that used to stand on the table next to his bed lay somewhere in the corner of his bedroom, shattered into pieces due to the impact of it hitting the wall. Namjoon had thrown the clock at the wall on the opposite site of the room because he couldn't bear watching the time passing by, time he couldn't spend with Hoseok. He didn't care how much time passed by because the pain within would subside the slightest bit.

He did eat, he had to or else he would die. He couldn't bear the thought of dying alone, leaving a world in which Hoseok still breathed. Sometimes the thought of dying wasn't so bad, he thought about the fact that he wouldn't be hurting anymore. But, he had always been one to love life, even if he couldn't spend his days working on music. But usually Hoseok then would have been at his side. Hoseok. The slightly older male was on his mind 24/7. There was no way around thinking about the older since every thought, everything he looked at reminded him of him.

He deeply regretted not being there for Hoseok w