Mirai POV

I sat in his bedroom. Everything was neatly placed, making me feel more ashamed of my own room. The scent in his room is just like its owner, fresh and tranquil. Yet it does very little to calm me down, sobbing massively like there's no end.

"Little Miss cry baby... It's not worth crying so long, ne."

"Sorry..." I still struggled to speak in between my cries and it got louder everytime I try to speak. I nervously twirl my fingers with my shirt, hoping he won't be frustrated with me. I'm surprised that for all the troubles I caused, he is still so patient and gentle. He took my hands and rubbed them warmly, and amazingly it helped me unnerved.

"Better?" He looked into my eyes and asked. I must be looking really horrible with those reddened eyes and nose, so I desperately try to avoid, though those pair of blue eyes shimmers so beautifully under the twilight that it's hard not to look. Nonetheless, I nodded. Another loud slam against the window startled me into a jump and there I erupted in cries once again. I could almost imagine his sighs and curses, yet his actions was nothing like that.

"It's okay, shh..." He sat beside me brought me into his embrace, rubbing my back with his hands as I leaned on him. "I'm here..." Everytime the thunderous clasped cause a tightness in my heart, I tugged deeper into his arms. There's no letting go, I just let myself relied on him. I wet his top with my tears, but he told me it doesn't matter. Resting on his shoulders, I gradually became at ease with the surroundings. His reassurance got me forgetting my fear, and reminding me of my mother cradling me in her arms on such nights. It was such feelings I yearned, and he could replicate it so well. The temperature radiating from his skin was so right that I neednt a blanket to keep me cozy. Could it be the quietness this night, the comfort in his strong arms, the intimacy from the colliding of our bare skins that got my mind going wild? Cause it was that instance, I had the strong urge to claim possession of his lips. I knew that instance I probably won't be able to wait for him to make the move. My inexperience in this gave me the blind courage. Besides, it's not like I haven't embarrass myself in front of him. I searched for his eyes then when I found it, I slowly leaned forward. Well, that's how drama guys do it - Be soft and gentle. Move slowly from his mouth to his ears and neck, then back to his mouth again. Tilt your head gracefully when he kisses your neck. Smiling and laughing in between kisses is nice too. Yes, I memorised the routine despite having not tried out before.

No no, this is not part of the usual script. Not only did I not make it to his supple looking lips, he brushed me away. he stopped me from leaning anywhere near, and instead he politely said, "let me give a call to your brother so he wouldn't worry."

I was speechless, so I didn't respond immediately. Nevertheless he wasnt waiting for my response. He left my sight and made the call. I was actually glad he was not within sight cause I don't think I can hide my disappointment. In fact, it added to my uneasiness cause when a Boyfriend doesn't want to kiss her Girlfriend, that should be a problem - isn't it? Was it because he hasn't got over his previous Girlfriend and possibly the intimacies they had, so he doesn't feel comfortable with me? Or is it he has another girl in her life? He is handsome and all, and if people don't know his underlying flaw (which I'm sure some people don't care as long as he is extremely handsome), I'm sure he'll receive much love too. I'm not even gonna pretend I wasn't upset, when he came back with another futon beside his bed. Though I'm not in the position to comment since I technically have no experience in a romantic relationship, I thought guys wouldn't usually be so reserved. It would be humiliating if I continue to crave for him to tug me into bed, but I simply could not pretend the storm isn't taking a toll on me.

"Ahhh..." I screamed it all out with the loud thunder clasp, and probably took the opportunity to let out ALL my pettiness with his passive behaviour.

"Are you okay?"

That question was clearly redundant. I shook my head timidly. Even if it's humiliating and putting down my prestige, I had to ask again, with obviously the risk of being rejected. A second rejection would stab a deadly wound in my heart.

"Can I sit beside you?"

"Heh?" He gave a shocked expression as if he was surprised at how bold a girl can get. "... Let me come up instead" he came up on the bed then sat beside me while helping me lie down. Clearly, he has no intention to let his guard down beside me. 

"You're not gonna sleep?" I asked as I looked up at him.

"I'll wait for you to sleep first. Don't worry about the rain, it'll be over by the time you wake up. And I'm not leaving you, so just relax and sleep"

So I realised he will eventually be using the futon. That, however, was a sweet line, he even made the most gentle moves, holding my hand in one and my fringe with another. I feel the immense sense of protection I received from him, that I gradually fell sound asleep in his warmth and comfort without fear. I'm not even able to dream of him sleeping by my side, cause his rejection remained edged in my mind. When all other worries become casted aside by the end of the terrible storm, I began to think of whether was I just too unattractive that he won't even share a moment with me. There's only this reason, no matter how I think. I woke up to see him, still in deep sleep on the futon. I quietly watched him from the corner of my bed, watching his chest rise and fall in a rhythmic pattern. I temporarily forgot the unhappiness he set upon me. He is not usually insensitive to feelings, he is usually reading deeper into my thoughts, but not this time. No matter how many times I asked myself, I didn't seem to get an answer, except more confusion. Maybe I shall sneak one on his lips without him knowing? My action acted faster than my mind. I dangled my upperhalf body from the bed towards him like doing push-up. It was simply hilarious. He is so perfect even at such proximity. However, my stupidity still caught on. What exactly was I thinking! How is it even possible to sneak an attack on him, cause the instance I got too close for comfort, my elbow weakened and I fell on top of him. he jerked awake.

"Eh?!" His eyes widened just as when I quickly pulled back fast. Not only did i not manage to get the kiss, I was in such awkward position. "Did you just rolled down the bed?"

"... Ah... I..." 

"Maybe you can consider to seat up first?" He reminded me that I was still lying on top of him. I quickly moved myself away with my face blushed like a hot tomato.

"No issues about it. I heard You have bad sleeping habits ..."

"Not you too, Yamada Ryosuke~" I pouted, then dashed out of his room hoping to dig a whole and bury myself in it. It's really a humiliating morning. We brushed our teeth together in the small toilet and I craved for his warmth whenever he crouch over me to get somethings.

"You sure you don't want me to cook something simple?" He asked.

"No need, it's okay, Ryosuke. My brother is bringing me out of breakfast before school. Wanna join us?"

"Nah, it's your sibling time anyway. I'll walk you to your house then."

"Okays..." I said. Anything for spending a little more time with him and cause a few jealousy among the female neighbors are all worth it. We paced towards my house and it was then, I asked that burning question in my mind, "if I'm alone during a storm again, can you accompany too?"

"Of course, anytime. But... Is there any particular reason for your fear for storm?...I'm just asking though, if you're not comfortable to share, it's okay"

I chuckled, "actually it was because when I was very young, a very bad storm hit, I was alone but the roof of my house almost blew off. It was Daiki who found me, hiding in the basement."

"And so, from then, you are afraid of storms?" He asked with a concerned look.

"Yes. It's stupid isn't it..."

"Nah, don't think that way. Everyone has their own fears..."

"What's yours?"

He seemed surprised by my question. I thought I could see some complex thoughts running in his mind. It seems overloaded and intense. But nothing beats when his phone rang. He seemed startled, especially so when he saw the caller ID. With a look of reluctance, he picked up the call and that frown on his face was disturbing. He didn't speak to the call at all and when he put down, he seemed in complete distraught. I called his name but he didn't answer me too. 

"Ryosuke~ is something wrong?" I said once more, this time I let myself to his hand, holding it tightly - to indicate that whatever it is, I'm here for him.

"I'm okay... Your brother is in front. I'll see you in school. Bye!" He released himself from my hand and walked off, apparently in a hurry. I couldn't take my eyes off him or stop worrying for him. Worry? Or maybe suspicious that he's hiding something from me? 

"Oi Mirai!" Daiki wrestled me, clenched onto my neck beneath his arms. 

"Yamette Niichan!"

"So you spent a day at a guy's house~ that's breaking a house rule."

"Not any guy... He is my boyfriend... Besides, you don't have to worry, Ryosuke wouldn't even touch me..."

"Heh?! So you tried to?!! Shida Mirai!" Daiki was furious but I was upset as I recalled.

"He wouldn't even give me a kiss. Just hugs, that's all. Niichan, can we just go for breakfast now. I don't really wanna talk about what did not happen."

"Okay, I won't say it anymore but I hope you know what you're doing." He said with a softer tone then we walked to a cafe near my school. I frankly didn't quite have the appetite. My mind is flooded with all sorts of questions about Ryosuke, it would be a lie to say I didn't mind.

"Mirai, are you even listening to me?"

"Heh? Sorry, what were you saying again?"

"About Sora... Should I accept her feelings?"

"I think it's about time you get over the previous girl, besides she isn't good for you. Sora, she's nice, cheerful and I'm sure you will like her."

"I know I will, but I'm just unsure if i have completely gotten over the previous."

"Don't think so much niichan... You and Sora suits each other so you shouldnt waste it. Sora really likes you though..."

"How does she express it?" Daiki leaned forward excitedly to listen.

"Ah.. I'm not going to share our little secrets. You go find it out yourself." I chuckled.

"I always knew I was quite the mesmeriser" he boasted and I kind of rolled my eyes in annoyance. I took out my phone and texted someone who is more than happy to accept his pride. And i hid that cheeky laughter while patiently waiting for her to arrive. I can't wait to see the awkward expression on my brother's. 

"Good morning!" 

When I heard that cheerful greetings, I know she is here.

"Hi, Sora!" I greeted first and I realised Kento and Umika were outside the cafe too. I quickly stood up and said, "I shan't disturb the 2 of you. See you in class!" I said to Sora and ushered her to take my seat, giving her no way of escaping. 
then hopped to school.

And so, me sitting in the classroom, feeling alone. Sora has Daiki now, Umika has Kento, me? Im here thinking of my boyfriend as if he didn't exist in my life. I laid on the table, lethargically going through my lessons. There wasn't a single text message from him that could perk me up. 

"Mirai, instead of waiting for his text, you should just text back," Umika reminded as she propped herself towards my table. Maybe I should... I retrieved my handphone and keyed in without much thoughts.

"Ryosuke,

How's your day? Wanna go home together?"

The fact that he replied instantly made me even more disappointed that he didn't initiate to contact me at all.

"Mirai,

I'll be busy today. Sorry. Will give you a call at night."

"What's he busy with?" Sora took a peek and asked casually. I couldn't answer her question but didn't want her to think of the bad scenarios so I lied, "he's busy with some assignments. He needs to rush it."

"Really? Or is he busy with another girl?" Umika said as she looked out of the window facing the school gate.

"Heh?!" I rushed to the window with Sora and saw exactly what Umika was saying. Though it was far (and I seriously hope Umika was seeing things), it was undeniably a fact that he was boarding a car with a slim lady dressed in a full black dress. 

Ryosuke, who is she? I thought you said you were busy with school work? I thought to myself. I have heard of people's worry for their boyfriend 2-timing, but I never thought Ryosuke would be that kind of guys. He is supposed to be committed, sentimental, loving and protective. Our love should be stronger than anyone else's cause it took us great lengths to come this far. Could it be, our love is not deep enough because of all those tiring challenges.

"Mirai, let's go!" Umika took my hands and the three of us ran out of school. I was lost at what she's doing, but i just followed anyway. We boarded a bus then it drove a few streets before we alighted. I was surprised to see Kento in the front.

"here! They're inside." He said.

"Who?" I'm still confused.

"Ryosuke and that lady. Kento was following them, that's why we could catch up." Umika said. I took a look from outside and I saw Ryosuke sitting at the table with the black dressed lady. The lady looks classy with a black sunglasses. Her lips is bright red; she is gorgeous. I can't quite tell her age from the side profile but they seemed like they know each other quite well, despite him looking more polite with her. Not sure if that's good or bad but I felt really nervous.

"It's not nice to be stalking them...I don't want to suspect him like this..." I was in self-conflict. I took a turn and was about to walk off but even that decision of mine is uncertain. A part of me wants to know what's going on, a part of me don't dare to watch further. I could hear the girls calling my name in surprise by my reaction. It was however Kento who caught on to me.

"Mirai, you're running away because you don't dare to face what lies behind isn't it..."

"... Yes... Yes, I don't dare to see..."

"Mirai, tell me what happened, what's bothering you? You were uncertain even before this."

I told Kento what happened yesterday night, I was unreservedly telling him. I thought perhaps it was what we shared previously that made our relationship more casual. He seemed to more calm than anyone who heard the story.

"I think Ryosuke did right though."

"He did?"

"It's not because he is not attracted to you, Mirai. I think he's trying not to take advantage of you when you are in a vulnerable state. I actually respect him more now."

"You really think that's what he is thinking?"

"I may dislike him and all, but I think he has been protecting you even from himself. I have to admit he's a good guy." What Kento said did seem right. In fact, it made sense. I became appease with myself and returned a smile of gratitude towards Kento. 

"Anou!" Sora's voice was so audible, we both turned around, only to see her stopping the lady from going up the car. She now wore a sunhat that makes her look so much more magnificent than earlier. Her aura was so strong and by the look of the limousine, it's obvious she's someone in the higher class hierarchy.

"Yes? Who are you?"

"It doesn't matter who I am... This girl over here is Shida Mirai. She is Ryosuke's girlfriend and if you are thinking of hitting on him, I hope you will give up those thoughts." Sora blurted out even though I pulled her sleeves to stop her from going on.

"Yeah, he is not up for grabs anymore. Even if you're rich and all, he wont be interested in you. He has went through thick and thins with Mirai and there's no way you can separate them." Umika added.

"Minna... Shh..." I tried to hush them. "I'll apologise on my friends behalf. It's unruly of us to say that to you. I hope you won't mind."

The lady came towards me. Her citrusy perfume was so strong, I almost choked on them. I moved backward, almost tripping over the pavement. Kento shielded me from the lady's intimidating eyes, and asked "Is there something you would like to say ma'am.?"

"Shida Mirai... Interesting... Why not you go ask Ryosuke who I am? I'm surprised you still don't know... You're not that close with him after all... I wonder how much more things he is keeping from you, Mirai..." 

"Watch your mouth, ma'am... And whether or not Mirai ask, is none of your business. Besides, i dont even think she needs to ask him, cause it wouldn't matter."

Umika and Sora agreed, but as the female lead, I was awfully quiet, too stunned to speak after the verbal intimidation.

"Oh really? I wonder what Shida-san thinks...i believe we will meet again. My warning to you is to hold on to Ryosuke tighter than ever"

Was that merely a warning? Or is she declaring war with me?! Umika and Sora held onto me, giving me strength while Kento looked all the more frustrated as the limousine drove away, flaunting its wealth.

"Mirai, don't take it to heart. She's just fooling with you. We've got your back!" The girls exclaimed.

"That's right. If Ryosuke dare hurt you, we won't be nice to him too." Kento added.

"Minna, thank you..."

"Let's just go for dinner together? I'll cook!" Kento exclaimed.

"Really, niichan?" Sora was excited, then she added, "girls, my brother cooks well. We are in for a treat."

Kento proudly accepted the praises, "of course I cook well" and the 2 girls laughed. Mine felt too forced. 

"I'm okay, you guys can go ahead. I think I want some time alone..." I originally wanted to use Daiki as an excuse but I'm not sure if Sora knows my brother's plan tonight doesn't involve me at all.

"Mirai~ don't be alone. We will accompany you." Umika added. I'm more surprised by how Kento managed to read my mind. "Do what you want, Mirai. If you need us, just give us a call..."

"Thanks" i returned a subtle smile, and Kento hurried them away. I was thankful. It was not only the silence I needed, but I wanted my alone time to look back at Ryosuke. What did she tell him, why is he sitting alone in the cafe, looking so perplexed and lonely. I would almost dash in to accompany him but I can't let him know I followed him. I called him on the phone with hopes he would let me find him... But i was wrong.

"Ryosuke. Shall I come and find you? I'm really bored ne. Where are you now?"

"I'm running some errands for sensei and I won't be done anytime soon."

"... Errands? What kind of errands? Maybe I can help..."

"... I told you I'm busy Mirai." He raised his voice and I could see him frustratedly scratching his head, but he seemed to realise his harshness. He lowered his voice and softened his tone, "I'll call you later, alright..." 

"... O-okay. Sorry Ryosuke."

Just when i saw about to put down the call, I heard him say a very apologetic sorry, so softly uttered it seemed he didn't want me to hear, so sorrowful it felt deeper than just another apology. I slipped into depressing thoughts, that perhaps he was cheating on me? 

I brood over it at home so badly, every second of my time is spent rolling back and forth of my bed. Even when my brother returned, i was still much dazed.

"Oi, you are growing fungus already. How long have you been lying on bed. Have you even eaten?"

"How's your date with Sora today?"

"What date? I didn't go on a date today. And were you even listening to my question?"

"What were you asking?" I really were not listening. He was impatient with me by now, unwilling to listen to my blurness. He pulled my arms and dragged me to the dining area. He let me sit in total seclusion only for awhile until he cooked up a pipping hot plate of spaghetti. He sat in front of me like a supervisor, with stern eyes.

"This won't do, Shida Mirai. If there's any misunderstandings between the 2 of you, i suggest you stop running away from it and face it. You won't be able to rest if you don't get this cleared up."

"You mean I should confront him?"

"Yes. I don't know what exactly happened and am not about to ask. You know better, that the problem is not gonna run away by pretending it never happen. You just have to ask him everything you are unsure."

"You really think it's okay to ask?"

"If you ask me, you are definitely not okay. Sitting here and blindly speculating will not do you any good either."

"Arigatou niichan!" I dashed off to his house, completely ignoring his top of his voice reminder to return home early. Those words he said, was frankly in me all these while, but didn't have the confidence and assurance to go ahead. I'm honestly not sure if it's the right thing to do but when my brother explained it from a third person's view, it made total sense. I'm his girlfriend, and there's no wrong checking on her boyfriend right... Everyone does that.

I stood at his door, ringing his bell impatiently. I forgot to even call and check if he's already home. It would have been a wasted trip. Fortunately the door swings open.

"Mirai? I didn't know you'll come."

"Sorry for making an announced trip here... Can I go in?" I asked because he stood at the door, as if unwilling to let me in. Or rather, there's something or someone he didn't want me to see? I was suspicious. My stubbornness is not gonna take no for an answer, so while he is paused for an unusual long time, I let myself in.

"Did something happen?" I was worried when I saw his small apartment in it's unusually less neat condition. There were white tablets scattered on the ground. I know those tablets anywhere. It was his medicine... He scrambled to pick them up when I asked. His hands were trembling as he was picking so I went over and help him. He was fearful, and the more he averted my gaze, the questionable he is. Definitely, he was hiding something from me.

"Ryosuke..."

"Mirai, I don't feel too well today. I would like to rest, if you don't mind. I'll see you tomorrow instead."

"I can stay and help..."

"Help what?! I don't need your help and there's nothing you can!" He raised his voice while he kept his medicine in a drawer. Still he didn't look at me, until he realised he was overboard with his reply to my offer.

"Just go home first. I'll meet you first thing in the morning..." He held me by my shoulders and asked me with eyes gazing directly into mine. His eyes were so complexed and heavy. When he realised I was reading too deep into his mind, his gaze wavered.

"There's something wrong right? What is it you're not telling me, Ryosuke?" I did regretted sounding demanding.

"What do you mean?" His brows knotted deep.

"You weren't with any sensei nor were you at school after dismissal. You told me so, but you were at a cafe." I told myself not to reveal my stalking experience but it a fit of anger (or betrayal), i blurted out everything.

"How did you know? You were following me?" His glance changed. It became fierce in the midst of dealing with the surprising revelation. "You followed me~ "

"... I... You cant blame me... You haven't told me everything and you weren't truthful. And especially, you won't even do normal couple things with me..." I said my uneasiness without reservations, i did sound like a whinny kid demanding attention and love.

He shut his eyes in annoyance with his fist clenched. I could tell he's trying to reconcile what I just said. I made a wrong move not to give him that breather.

"Who's that lady? She's your lover? Your ex?"

He broke into hysteric laughter then when it stopped he said in a mocking way, "...all these just cause I didn't kiss you?... I thought you had all that magnanimous love where you said you didnt mind my differences with other guys."

"It doesnt have to do with your sickness. It's a different matter." I explained against his farfetched link. Somehow I feel angry that he was using his illness as an excuse for his infidelity.

"... I thought you were different, I thought you said you would accept everything about me.  You're just like any other girl, craving for such intimacy. you can go ahead and look for another guy who kisses you day and night and sleep with you. Perhaps Kento will love it. That way your cravings will be satisfied~"

"Yamada Ryosuke! Thats rude!" Out of rage for his ual insensitivity and insult, i gave him a deafening slap across his face. I immediately regretted with my tears welled up in my eyes. Why did I do that?! I didnt even slap my brother before, cause I know a slap has a much more hurtful connotations, especially to a guy's dignity. So at most, me and Daiki will only wrestle. Yet I did it so conveniently to Ryosuke. He held his face for a short while as he paused. His eyes filled with vengeance that didnt dissipate.
 
"Ryosuke~ i didnt mean it, im sorry..." I went up to him, hoping to care for his reddened face.

He said coldly while shrugging me away, "i'll say it again even if it's an insult to you, It's unreasonable for you to understand me, thats why I told you im no good for you! So just leave me alone!"

"No... No ..." 

"Dont come any closer!... If not I really dont know how I'll hurt you~  You know what, I might as well tell you now, if you are expecting me to do what a normal lover would do.... I wont... And I cant." He saw my confused look. It seemed it requires alot of effort for him to say any more.

"I dont feel anything with people, except hate. Do you get it?! If there's supposed to be fuzziness in my heart whenever we hold hands, we hug or simply every moment we share together, then i can tell you i dont feel it. I dont feel the way other guys would. The years in the mental institute has taken a toll on me. Im almost just a guy without a heart. Love, kinship, friendship, to be close to someone, was much more painful. Every interaction I had with the first girl before you was so so tormenting for me. And when you came along, i thought I would be okay if its you. But it's still just as tiring. when a guy cant even give his girlfriend that sense of security and assurance she desires, then the guy deserves no love! It's not because I dont wanna love you, but I really cant... I tried but everytime I get too close, I feel my brain is gonna burst apart." He collapsed on the ground and cried so hard. He was hurting his arms with his fingers, scratching them like there were worms beneath his skin. He was knocking his head against the wall like he hoped it would knock out his frustrations.

"Ryosuke~" i quickly grabbed the medicine, rushed to him, kneeled down to his level and hugged him. I wrapped my arms around his body, stopping him from hurting his own arms further. his head rests on me while I brushed his hair gently within my fingers, with the sides of his head showing some redness. "Eat some medicine..." I fed him one pill, and it took a long time for him to finally relax. We both sat on the ground at ease, with him never leaving my arms. I was actually glad that his exhaustion finally puts him to sleep. Frankly, I was frightened to see Ryosuke in a relapse. I was not even good dealing with a crying friend, lest a guy in such vulnerable sickness. I leaned him against my shoulders and there I got a better glimpse of him. I could see his face still damped with fresh tears silently falling. 

Intensely i looked at him and asked myself, "who's the lady?" But i have no courage to bring it up again, i dont wanna lose Ryosuke. Doubting him has become more traumatic for him then I thought.

School the next day was burdensome. I was carrying my heavy eyebags, dragging my feet to class. I deliberately avoided the normal route so I wouldnt bump into Ryosuke, I kinda needed that space so I could settle down from yesterday. Several detours before I reached class, and everyone was already inside.

"Mirai!" The 2 girls ran up to me and ushered me to my seat. They earnestly hoped I have found out the identity of my love rival, but they were disappointed at my revelation. Worrisome look spread across their faces as I unreservedly shared my story.

"So what happened after that?" Sora asked.

"I dont know. I left after he fell asleep. He didnt want to see me anymore, what should I do?"

"I dont think you should take what he said then as final. Come, you've gotta face it, ask him directly if he means what he said..." Sora grabs my hand and pulls me out of class even though I desperately resisted cause class is starting. Well, that's an excuse so that I won't faces an awkward confrontation. I also didn't wanna cause a breakdown. Fortunately, Yuriko sensei who was at the hallway saved me from the ordeal. 

"Mirai, Sora, Umika... Where are you girls going?"

"Sensei, Mirai has something urgent to see to now. We'll be back fast." Sora explained while Umika timidly stood frozen.

"Just nice, I need to see Mirai for awhile. You girls go back to class first." We were all surprised by sensei's abrupt instructions. I looked at sensei and felt that she knew what I was thinking? That's impossible. When Sora and Umika stepped away, Yuriko sensei brought me to a isolated corridor.

"I saw Ryosuke earlier. He looks pale. Since he won't talk to me unnecessarily, I thought I should ask you. The kid is worrying me?"

"Pale? Is he sick?"

"Well, knowing him, he will force himself to go on as normal. He won't ever admit his weakness."

"I didn't know this point of him... I'm such a failure."

"It takes time, Mirai. I know him earlier than you, so it's naturally i have grasped his habits. From your tone, it seems something happened between the 2 of you?"

"Sensei, there's this lady in his life I don't know and he wouldn't explain. And he... He wouldn't touch me."

"You don't have to worry that you are not attractive, cause Ryosuke isn't the kind who thinks superficially. It just takes a while longer than other guys to get comfortable with others. From what I see, he's already very open with you. And as for that lady, I don't know who she is but I'm sure he didn't cheat on you if that's what you are thinking. You need to have faith in him, that's the most important element in keeping relationships going."

I was startled by my phone ringing. I excused myself to pick up the call from Kento, only to get myself in a huge shock.

"What happened?" Yuriko sensei asked when she saw me flustered. 

"Ryosuke... He fainted during track and fields... Sensei, I'll go and look for him right now!"

"Okay, please go... Try to catch up with lessons from Umika and Sora."

"Okay, thank you sensei." I rushed off, throwing all those negative thoughts out of my mind. my heart pounding for reasons mixed in complexity. The words to break up with me is vividly edged in my mind. I was afraid he meant it. I was nervous. When I saw him through the door to the nurse's office, he appeared weak and pale, just like Kento described. Yet he was still trying so hard to pull himself together. Tears brimmed as I thought to myself again the loneliness of having to face the worst himself throughout his childhood. 

***
Kento POV

It was track and fields lesson and the class went to change into their jerseys. On my way out of class, I saw Ryosuke walking out of class, looking like he didn't have the intention to join in. As always. 

"Ryosuke!" I caught up to him. "You going to sit at the podium again?"

"Yes."

"Well, things have changed. So if you think we're going to leave you behind. We won't. So let's go to the fields." I grabbed his arms and pulled him towards the opposite direction, but then i realised something was wrong.

"Oi, you are burning..." I exclaimed then looked at him carefully. "Oh goodness, you dont look too good. You are pale."

"Im okay. I didnt sleep well yesterday."

"But you're definitely running a fever. You've got to see the doctor. I'll alert sensei and you can take absence from school"

"No, im okay." He raised his voice a little without realising then softened down, "we're going to be late for class. Let's go, Kento. Im really fine"

"Let me at least tell Mirai about it..." I took out my phone, but he reacted almost instantly.

"Dont~ she doesnt have to know."

"Why? She's your girlfriend. That's how couples support each other" im thinking if something had happened after the encounter with the woman.

"I dont want her to worry. Please just leave me alone. I'll take care of myself like always" he sounded so terribly annoyed. If he prefers it this way, thenI shan't be a busybody. I walked behind him to the fields where the rest of the class was waiting. They were already divided into groups, and I was hoping there's one for him.

"Ryosuke, here! We leave a spot for you and Kento" one of the girls hollered out. Things did change for the better for Ryosuke, at least the class is opening up to him and even the girls are becoming attracted to him again. So he's now my rival for best looking male, perhaps. I chuckled. Fortunately for Mirai, he appears the least interested. He politely shrugged the girls off and joined the guys whom welcomed him. I kept a close watch on him since i really dont trust that a guy pale as paper is fine. It's definitely just a case of sleep deficiency when his temperature is terribly wrong.

"Gather around. I need the first contestants of each group." Sensei said.

"Yamada, you should run first. You're fast, you'll give us the leadtime" one of the guys said. The group agreed. 

"I think we should get Ryu to run first. We can leave our best bet behind to stun our competitors" i suggested. Ryosuke obviously knew that I was trying to let him rest. I should have known though, he wont accept my offer given his stubborn behaviour.  

"I can go first. Ryu is fast too, he can help at the back." He said, and his strategy did convince everyone. I sighed. As soon as everyone goes to prepare and Ryosuke walked to his starting point, i went up to him.

"Oi. You're already breaking out in cold sweat. Please just rest. It's not too late"

"I'll finish this." He managed a smile. Seriously, to a person who has been nasty to him for the longest time, that smile just stirs my guilt. He can actually be a good friend. 

"If at anytime you cant take it, just stop. Dont push yourself, Okay?" 

He nodded, then hurried to the starting line. With the sound of the whistle, the first batch is off. It was a clear lead, Ryosuke was right in front, and no matter how hard the rest tried, he was still in the front. The girls were mesmerised of course. When he returned to the base, it seems he struggled alittle to pass the baton to the next runner. I watched him wobbled a little bit before everyone started crowding around him.

"Ryosuke~" i pulled him out of the cheerful crowd. He was breaking out in cold sweat, yet the irony was he is burning so much. "You're definitely not right. I'll bring you to the nurse's room." He didnt say a word this time, and im not gonna allow it either. 

"Sensei, Ryosuke is not well. I'll bring him to the nurse."

"Yes, please. Take care Ryosuke" sensei kindly exclaimed. I saw some classmates noticing but it was more of worried glances. He was pushing himself, I was sure. I saw the cringes on his face and I wondered why he is trying so hard to put a tough front. He probably has always been like that. 

"Oi Ryosuke!" The moment we are back in the building, he collapsed, fortunately I caught him. I piggybacked him and i quickly rushed to the nurse. "Sensei! He fainted." 

"What happened?" Sensei asked as I put him on the bed. He was clearly semi-conscious. The frown on his face can really break a heart. She took over from me and it neednt take long for her to realise the problem.

"This silly boy is running high fever. We need to bring his temperature down or it'll hurt his head. We probably need to call the hospital."

"No... I dont want to go to the hospital," he struggled to speak.

"Okay, okay. Then we got to bring your temperature down," sensei reiterated. I helped her bring Ryosuke to an empty washroom and while she was preparing the tub of ice, and Ryosuke sat against the wall, I quickly ran to inform the one person who should know.

"Boy..." The nurse called out as soon as I have disengaged my call. I went back into the washroom, and the nurse has already got Ryosuke soaked in the tub of ice. The water is freezing cold even for a healthy person like me, lest Ryosuke whose top was removed.

"Isnt he gonna freeze?"

"No choice, his temperature has to be brought down immediately."

He was trembling, jaw tightened and not a word was uttered. I heard some sniffing sounds near the door to the toilet, and there I saw her head plopping in and out. I walked out and it was definitely the person I was waiting.

"Mirai... It's not the time to cry. Pull yourself together and help him."

"He wont wanna see me..."

"Dont assume. Go... He'll feel better with you around."

"Sensei! Mirai will help you, im going back to class~" I mischievously hollered out then gave Mirai a push into the washroom. I could see her stunned in her position, nervous, until the angsty sensei shouted at her. "Oi, how long are you gonna stand there! Help out!"

Ryosuke seemed to have some reaction to her reprimanding at Mirai, and especially at her clumsiness as she tried to help the nurse. "How stupid can you be?" She scolded as Mirai dropped the pail of ice water.

"Gomenasai... Hontoni gomenasai..."

"You are more like a troublemaker. You stay here and continue monitoring. I go get more ice"

"Sensei, let me help. I can go take the ice."

"I rather you not." She raised her voice and stomped out of the washroom. Mirai is obviously holding back her tears, anyone could tell, even the semi-conscious Ryosuke. She was too nervous to not have noticed Ryosuke was watching her. She placed the thermometer in his ear while wiping her fallen tears.

"Dont mind her, she's just frustrated at me for causing her troubles" Ryosuke said weakly. Only then Mirai realised Ryosuke's consciousness, but even then she didnt have the courage to look at him. 

"It's me. I cant do anything right. I hurt you yesterday, I disappointed you... I even suspect you. Im terrible as a person and as a girlfriend. I can understand if you dont wanna be with someone like me." She started sobbing with her hands covering her face. At this point, im confused who's comforting who. She's supposed to be helping him and it honestly felt like it was the other way around. 

But this Ryosuke is really dependable with his own ways of spoiling her. I laughed as I saw the whole thing. He held the crying Mirai on her head with his seemingly ice cold hands. He pulled her closer, then he secures her lips with his. I had such good view, i saw how both lips... Relaxed with time... Passion... Caring... That's how I felt that time for them paused. I quietly retreated from the background, leaving the two lovebirds together.

"Sensei, let little Miss clumsy settle it." I stopped the nurse from returning.

"What? She cant get anything right..."

"She only needs to get one thing right. And I think she's gonna cure him." Kento placed his hands on the nurse's shoulders and lead her away. "Gambare Mirai~"

***
Mirai POV

 My heart was pumping so fast I thought it will stop. A and caressing of lips on lips with a few gentle nibbles thrown in, that feeling was like many butterflies fluttering in my stomach then there's this unknown comforting warmth gradually putting me at ease. He tangled his fingers within my hair, he's so gentle that I could probably keep up with it the whole night. Until he ended the moment, my soul still did not return.

"I... I thought you wont..." I was still in disbelief, especially when the scars he said yesterday continues to vividly stay in my mind, unable to forget.

"I scared you yesterday... Sorry, I acted the way I did and said so horrible things to you. I selfishly thought I can take my time to overcome my own fears. I didnt know I made you so uncertain"

"So... Am I okay?" I asked him like I am being graded. Do girls even ask this way? I guess not, cause he started laughing lightly.

"I guess I was right, that if it's you, i'll be okay. Thanks Mirai, for not pushing me away... I would have scored you 100, and me, possibly a less than passing mark?"

"You scored 101!!! You were like marshmallows!!" Gosh what am I saying?! I feel the heat on my face, burning.

"Have I already passed my fever to you?" He stretched out his hand to my forehead. 

"No~ but i'm so happy, Ryosuke! Thank you! Thank you!!!" I threw myself over him. He is warm and cold all at the same time, well I expected that. While we were separated by the tub, i felt his supple skin, the flesh, that strong forearms, thick neck. 

"Mirai~... Can I at least dry myself and wear a top first. This is alittle inappropriate if someone sees us."

"Ah.... Gosh, sorry... I..."

He smiled while standing up to grab his clean uniform. I naturally turned away even though I knew he was covered at the bottom, but it's definitely weird to stare. 

"Let's go" he grabbed my hands and walked out of school. His palms are still abnormally warm so I naturally walked in front of him and checked his forehead.

"Your fever is still there."

"One cold bath isnt going to do wonders. I should be okay if I get a good sleep."

"I hope... Can I stay to take care of you?"

"If you dont mind. But promise me you go home earlier at night, or your brother is gonna kill me. Im sure he knows I upset you yesterday."

He made a point. Muddleheaded me would not have taken care of the details, i chuckled to myself. His tone of voice suddenly turned serious, and I listened carefully to what he had to say.

"Mirai... You showed me your life, your heart, and I'm thankful you did. I am glad you are quite readable too, and you're not pretentious, instead, very innocent. On the contrary, I havent told you alot about myself. I know that it made you uneasy... But give me sometime, I'll let you know about me, whatever you wish to know."

I nodded. It's not unreasonable for asking for some time. I could sense his sincerity and he's definitely not lying. He's just not prepared to say.

"About that lady... You shouldnt have to bother nor compare yourself with her. I have no feelings for her, if it matters to you."

I lightly squeezed his hand and gave him a reassuring smile that I believed him and that it needs no explanations. But he still ended with a cold warning which I cant comprehend, "i hope you'll never see her again. Especially not behind my back"

I looked at him dazed, but fortunately, he softens his gaze and said, "if there's anything you like to clarify, you dont have to stalk me, you can just ask. Even if cant answer directly, I promise I wont lie to you again."

As i watched him peaceful asleep on his bed, i could see his deep knots a symbol of the many burdensome thoughts that he cant immediately share with me. I am glad he is willing to share with me when the time comes, but I hope then, my heart will be able to absorb every bit of those truth. I  tugged him under the blanket and lightly massaged his fingers, until he cosily wrapped mine within his, holding my hands securely in his. I leaned forward and kissed him on the cheeks, with a smile of relief that the storm is over... 

Momentarily...