Don’t Let Anything Stop You

It felt like forever since Luhan was hiding in the shadows. He couldn't even understand himself anymore. He wants to see his son so badly, but whenever he tried, he'd always end up stepping back in shame of himself. At least he never missed on preparing Zhiyu's lunch... For a moment, knowing that his son eats the food that he makes was more than enough for him. He could only hope that Sehun would understand his decision. Luhan was afraid he wasn't ready to face either of them yet.

Just not yet. 

Perhaps, there were too many things bothering him. His parents had betrayed him, Zhiyu disliked him, and he had no idea how to win his heart after being an absent mother for all those years. 

Then one day, Luhan decided to face his biggest enemy in prison. There she was. Airin sat before him without meeting his gaze. She looked very haggard as if she hadn't slept or eaten at all. Part of him thought she deserved it. But then he remembered how much he had suffered after learning about his supposedly son's death and how much tears he shed for a child that wasn't his. Airin must have been so hurt too, he thought.

"Are you here to laugh at my face?" She broke the silence. 

Luhan unintentionally fixated his gaze on her. "That was the plan," he replied frankly. "I'm so angry at you and your parents to the point that I thought about laughing at your face and saying all the terrible things I wasn't able to say back then. But I think... seeing you is enough."

Airin sighed, feeling small all of a sudden.

"I can't tell whether our parents were being greedy or if they just loved us too much," Luhan added as he looked down on his lap. "It must have been hard having kids like us..." 

Without even realizing it, Airin's tears began to fall. As if everything that Luhan just said hit her in the gut with all the right ing words. It must have been hard for her parents to raise a kid with bipolar disorder, and for Luhan's parents to raise a kid who wasn't straight. 

"I named him Angel," Luhan continued. "Your baby boy." 

"I know," Airin blurted out regretfully. "I know everything." 

Luhan paused, before he let out a small, anxious laugh. "It must have been nice to know everything," he said sarcastically. "I was clueless. You —" 

"I'm sorry, Luhan." She cut him off to apologize sincerely. "I know it's too late now, but I really am sorry. Also... Sehun isn't Angel's father," she said as she finally met Luhan's scrutinizing gaze. "The truth is, I was by my boyfriend. Jun Woo abused me, even more when he found out about the baby. I was so scared, and Sehun was the only person I could think of. I lied to him so he could save me from my misery. I begged him. I gave him no choice but to take responsibility. I'm deeply sorry, Luhan. I was wrong. I was selfish. I'm so sorry, and I apologize on behalf of my parents as well," she began to cry. "I'm really really sorry, Luhan.” 

Luhan didn’t know what to say back then. He tried to look for any signs of deception in her eyes, afraid she was making a fool out of him again. He swallowed that fear and finally, after a long time, he sighed with relief and smiled wistfully to himself. He wasn’t okay, but he will be okay. He could only hope it would hurt less. 

As Luhan made his way back home, his phone started ringing. There was no name, but he had a feeling it was someone he knows. He answered the phone without hesitation, and his heart raced uncontrollably as he listened to that familiar voice which he had been avoiding for a while now.

“Luhan,” said Sehun on the other line. His voice was deep, and yet sweet like honey. “I’m sorry for calling out of the blue. I got your new number from Yixing.”