Author’s Note: I don’t own anything.

/own thoughts/
italics – past lives

Hold fast to love. It slips too easily away.
 

When the world around him didn't fall apart to the music of screaming, clanging metal, and heart wrenching sobs as his dreams were wont to do, Jiyong screamed again.

The reflection merely stared.

"Who are you!" Jiyong managed to get out, never taking his eyes off the glass.

The figure smiled sadly, lifted his hand from the mirror.

And then he was gone.

After a moment of shocked silence, Jiyong rubbed a hand over his drawn face, trying to calm his shaking.

"I'm just tired. There was no man who looked just like me standing in my mirror.”

Bom peeked warily from her doorway before venturing out of her room. The way her brother was watching her– like something to be studied under a microscope– was just getting on her nerves.

"Bom."

She jumped and whirled to meet a stoic gaze.

/oh, crap/

In her attempts to avoid her annoying brother, she completely forgot about the senior she was trying to avoid even more.

/Should have known that I would bump into him, though./

"Oh, hello," she stammered. "Fancy meeting you here." Her eyes narrowed. "In my house."

He nearly smiled but instead watched her, his gaze intense.

"Your brother let me in," he smiled gently then and held up a thick text book. "Yours?"

She scowled briefly. "Where did you get that?"

He shrugged. "In the quad. You should be more careful with your things."

"But..." she shook her head and trailed off. "I could have sworn that I didn't have it with me in the quad."

He merely lifted a shoulder again– he had decided to leave out the fact that he had taken it from her sister's pile on the café table when she wasn't looking.

"Anyways," she blushed and ducked her head, remembering the last time she had crashed into him. Mortification. "Bye! Thanks!"

TOP felt tiny hands pushing at him vainly and nearly laughed. Bom failed to see the humor. Pushing at him was like pushing at a mountain.

"Would you move?" she sputtered. "Why are you here!"

He stiffened.

"Why are you here, Bom?"

Her eyes shimmered with tears. He loved her desperately. Wanted to comfort her beyond anything.

But he didn't reach out.

Instead he sipped his tea, hoping that she didn't see the way the cup was shaking. "Why are you here?"

"Please don't leave, TOP," she whispered. Reaching out, she laid a hand over his rigid arm. "I...I..."

"Bom, I have to go." TOP stared straight ahead at nothing. "I cannot stay."

"No, you don't!" She pulled at his sleeve desperately. "You don't have to go!"

"Bom!"

She released his sleeve, but her eyes still glared.

"Why are you running away, TOP?"

He stiffened. "Do not talk of things that you cannot understand, Bom."

"You are a coward."

He balled his hands into fists and slid them up his sleeves so that he wouldn't be tempted to use them.

So that she wouldn't see them tremble.

She must have sensed his anger, for she bowed her head and whispered an apology. He didn't want to hear it.

"Bom." She looked at him, but he couldn't meet her gaze. Not when she was right. "Leave me."

She couldn't quite muffle the sob that tore at him, but she rose and bowed gracefully nonetheless. His  heart swelled with pride and love. His soul wept.

She turned and paused, looking at him Squaring her shoulders. Gathering courage.

He tensed, already knowing that she would trail a hesitant hand along the warm skin of his cheek. That she would touch her lips to his. That he would close his eyes and allow himself a sliver of peace that he didn't deserve.

He pushed her away, sickened with himself when, with silent tears, she ran out of the room.

The kiss was innocent; he should not have been staggered.

But his world had broken open.

TOP snapped back to reality, his cheek stinging with pain. She stared at him, bewildered and angry, her hand still raised as if to strike again. He lifted a hand to his mouth, shocked to find it warm from another's lips. Her lips.

/Oh./

"How dare you!" she sputtered. Her eyes were filled with an emotion that TOP could not begin to decipher. "Get away from me!"

Speechless, he had no other choice than to walk away, his head throbbing painfully, his heart ripped in two.

"TOP."

Pausing, he turned to look at her. Her eyes were sad and old, a fisted hand covering her heart.

"You cannot reverse the past." She offered a mockery of a smile that shot through him like an arrow. "You cannot confuse guilt with love. You cannot give someone false hope after tormenting them for so long."

He couldn't find the voice to answer; only watched as tears started to stream down her pale cheeks. His breaths grew unsteady.

"You cannot come back here again."

And then she left.

And he was alone.

"Who are you?" The ghost only raised a slim eyebrow.

"What do you want?"

At that, the man's expression grew impossibly weary and forlorn. Jiyong felt a wave of shame wash over him.

"Peace."

The apparition reached out and gently traced the frightened boy's cheek. Jiyong shivered. His touch was as cold as ice.

"Do not fail again, young one..."

"Fail?"

"I've waited too long, watched too many make the same mistakes as I did."

"What?"

"I grow tired," the man continued, closing his eyes and drawing a shuddering breath. "Tired, waiting for the one I love."

Jiyong raked an impatient hand through his hair. "What do you want me to do?"

/Ok, double check. Am reasoning with a ghost who looks exactly like me. Clothed in pink. Am I insane?/

The ghost smirked sadly, as if he could read Jiyong's thoughts.

/Wait./

"You're that thing," Jiyong breathed. "That thing inside of me. That voice."

The man nodded slowly. Jiyong fought with the instant indignation. His voice rose with it.

"What do you want from me? What do you want me to do?"

"Accept me."

And his world went dark.

"Dara."

She smiled at him, lifted a hand to wave.

And then she walked away.

Soohyuk screamed, jolting awake to find himself tangled in sweat dampened sheets. He tossed the blankets off, running pale hands over a tired face as he paced the floor. Hearing something, he turned and stiffened, seeing a newcomer. They stared at each other, unblinking, for several endless moments.

The intruder spoke quietly.

"People will talk."

Soohyuk knew this and nodded, smiling softly to himself.

"They will think you insane."

His eyes never wavered. "Dara will not. She is all that matters."

"She already thinks you are."

Soohyuk frowned. "Shut up."

"She is scared of you."

He dare taunt him?

"SHUT UP!" He shrieked it, flailing out with his fist. He watched in satisfaction as blood blossomed, scarlet on the boy's face. Blood. Soohyuk's smile slipped as he viewed the stain on his skin. Blood. His white hands reached to vainly cover his ears.

Blood. It was everywhere. On him. On his hands. He looked down and muffled a sob.

On her.

"Dara?" he whimpered, unsure. Her eyes were open, staring. Accusing.

Panicked, he picked her up tenderly, gagging when her head fell back limply. He laid the body out on the futon, straightening her disheveled hair gingerly. His hands were trembling.

Her hair was only disheveled because they had struggled. When he had stabbed her.

When he had killed her.

"What have I done?" he asked her.

She did not answer.

Muffling his sobs, he folded the mattress around her and pushed it in between the wall and her vanity table. He backed up and fell to his knees, placing his hands over his ears and rocking back and forth.

He had just killed the only woman he ever loved.

There was noise outside the room, and Soohyuk stopped breathing.

"Dara?"

A golden gaze swam before his teary eyes. Soohyuk had to bite his lip to keep from shouting. G-Dragon.

"Dara? Are you all right?"

Silence.

The man sighed ad Soohyuk could hear him shuffle his feet. "I'm sorry. I could have sworn that I felt something. But I suppose that you are still angry. We will talk tomorrow."

Silence.

G-Dragon spoke again and Soohyuk nearly laughed out loud at the hurt and confusion in his voice.

"Good...Good night, Dara." Soohyuk listened for the retreating footsteps, and let out his breath silently.

Good night.

I wonder how he will react when he comes across his beloved Dara tomorrow?

Soohyuk took comfort in that fact, slowly getting to his knees and heading for the window.

He stopped and blew a kiss to his beloved.

"I did this for us, Dara. This way you're mine. For always."

He blinked once to get his bearings. Then he glared at the smirking man in front of him "She's mine, I say," he hissed to the boy in the darkness, hating that mocking grin. He slammed his fist in the other boy's nose again and watched the blood trail down.

"Not yours. G-Dragon’s."

Soohyuk went insane; fists flying, breaths heaving.

"Mine! Mine! Do you hear me? Mine! Do you? NOT G-DRAGON’S!"

His arms fell to his sides, his breaths heaved out and he grinned at the sight of his opponent's bloodied face. The grin quickly shifted into a snarl as his mood shifted, and he spat at the offender, disgusted.

"Mine."

He walked away, jagged glass falling from the crimson splattered mirror.

No one is going to take her away.

If the world were to end this very instant, if the mountains crumbled and the seas dried up, if all of mankind were in chaos. How happy I would be, just to see your face.