I waited in the floor for a lovely embrace from my mom. She always does that whenever i came back from school. But instead of a warm Greeting, all i could hear was the ticking clock coming from the living room. Why this silence? Where are my parents? I looked around but found none of them in the house. After thinking for a bit i remembered my parents told me that they have a lot of works to do and would come late in the night. I climbed the stairs up to my room, placed my bag down on the desk then took a quick shower in the bathroom. Under the shower, all i could think about was Earn. His face appeared in my mind. He smiled at me, exposing his cute dimples that i love so much. Gosh, i missed his handsome face and charming smile. My lips automatically curved up and formed a little smile. Earn’s like a bright sun to me. When he smiles at me, i can’t resist the urge to smile back.

The image in my head went from his face down to his brown tanned, strong chest. I gulped. Suddenly the picture of his thoroughly fitted six pack appeared in my mind. Really, i want to touch his seductive body, broad shoulders, strong biceps, amazing chest and Six pack. My face heated up. The heat began to spread in my body and focused on my area. I blushed. To erase this tempting picture from my thought, i shook my head so hard that i felt dizzy. My legs began to lose strength. I put my palm on the wall to keep me from falling. A silent moment went by.

  „How embarassing!“, i muttered faintly. „…What the heck am i doing?“, i continued talking to myself. „He’s my best friend and here i’m thinking about y thing about him“, i thought. I didn’t move an inch until the dizziness left my body. 

After i regained some strength, i dried myself with the towel, returned in my room and searched for new cloths in my closet. I  wore jeans and a Shirt and put my mobilphone in the pocket.

I went downstairs and  searched in the refrigerator for the food my mom cooked for me. It was Rice and a few side dishes. I looked at the food but didn’t have any appetit.

It’s always the same. I don’t know why but since i realized that i’m in love with Earn and know he would never return the feeling, i began to eat less than usual. The problem is that i couldn’t get hungry even if i want to. Even my mom’s worried about me.

My mobilphone rang in my pocket. I saw on the screen and reacted surprised. It was Earn. My heart beated so fast that i thought it would jump out of my chest. First, i didn’t know what to do and panicked a little. I didn’t expect him to call me after all the things i did to him today. So i resited picking up the phone call. The ringtone ended but rang again a few seconds after. This time i took a deep breath, calmed myself and answered the call.

  „Hello?“, i spoke first.

  „Pete… Are you okay?“, Earn asked me. He sounded worried about something.

  „Huh?“, i thought confused. I wanted to say something but the words won’t come out of my mouth. Why did he ask me if i was alright? I waited a little bit and collected my voice. A few seconds went by before i opened my mouth again.

  „Are you okay?“, he questioned again when i didn’t answer him.

  „No, i’m not okay“, i wanted to tell him everything and give vent to my feelings but decided to lie. „Yeah, i’m fine“, i lied to him. I can’t tell him the truth that i’m in love with him und am suffering because of him. This confession would end our relationship or worse completely destroy me. I don’t want this to happen. To protect our friendship, i’d prefer to suffer alone like this.      

He sighed relieved. „Good, i can calm down now“, he said.

Why is he concerned about me? I have the feeling i missed something.

  „Did you eat something already?“, he asked me.

  „…No …I’m not hungry“, this time i sticked to the truth.

  „I noticed you didn’t eat anything at lunch in school.“

He noticed that? How come he was aware of that although he was busy glaring and smiling at Noh? The guy kept amazing me. He knew everything that happened around him even when he was intensively observing Noh.

His concern toward me should make me jump out of joy but somehow i’m not happy at all. Instead it made me flustered cause i know he’s only concerned that i, „his best friend“, was acting strange today.

  „Like i told you, i’m not hungry“, i repeated.

  „Hm. I didn’t eat anything either. Do you have time for me today?“

  „Why?“

  „Because i’m hungry and want to eat out.“

  „Didn’t your mom cook something for you?“

  „She did but i want to eat something nice once in a while. I don’t want to be alone so you have to accompany me. I’ll pay for your food too.“

Earn likes to decide everything on his own and i have to follow his decision. I know he’s stubborn and doesn’t give up easily but it would be great if he asks my opinion once in a while. Seriously, i’m not his servant.

To be honest, i wanted to go out with him but i had to keep my distance from him. I have to reject him if i want to get over him.

  „Please…“, he begged cutely, his voice so sweet like honey. Really, he sounded like a five year old boy who wanted something from his mom and had to beg nicely for it.

Damn Earn! This guy was doing it on purpose. He knew that i’m weak against his cute plead that’s why he used it to change my opinion. I could imagine him having one of his devious grins on his face. Now i had no choice but to give in and accept his invitation. It won’t kill me if i spent some time with him. My feelings for him won’t grow bigger as they have now. I could use this chance for some fresh air too.

  „Alright“, i gave in.

  „Yeah“, he said laughing.  

I was sure he was enjoying this trimph in this moment. I put a smile on my face.

  „Where and when should we meet?“, i asked him.

  „In one hour at the restaurant near the Siam Center… I’ll wait for you, Pete.“

  „See you later. Bye“, i hang up the mobilphone and put this back in my pocket.

My mind was telling me to distance myself from him but my heart wanted me to do the opposite. It urged me to go see him and fill the emptiness in me.  I felt excited and can’t wait to see him.