Chapter 7  Hidden Feelings

 

=Two Years Earlier =

 

“Chan-ah!” Cha Yookyung called his name as soon as he entered the class. She was there in her seat by the window. In front of her, there was Baekhyun who sat facing his back to his own desk. He smiled and raised his right hand to wave.

 

 

“Where were you? We’d been looking for you.” She asked when Chanyeol sat in his seat, the one beside hers.

 

 

“I went to teacher’s room.”

 

 

“Did you do something wrong? Is it because they found your cigarettes?” Teasing him, Baekhyun asked while grinning.

 

 

Believing Baekhyun’s words, Yookyung’s eyes grew bigger. “Omo, you smoke?”

 

 

“No, it’s not like that!” After defending himself, he glared at Baekhyun and kicked his leg. “Ya! One false statement will create false public opinion!”

 

 

Baekhyun chuckled. “It’s not a statement, I was just asking.”

 

 

Yookyung smiled when she saw her two friends arguing. They sometimes argued and teased each other, but it made them closer. She really enjoyed her moments together with Baekhyun and Chanyeol and hoped that a moment like this would last longer.

 

 

“Hey.” Yookyung tapped Baekhyun’s and Chanyeol’s shoulder, making them turn their heads to her. “The registration for Yongsan High will start this week. Wanna go there to get the form together?”

 

 

“Alright, how bout this Saturday?” Baekhyun suggested.

 

 

Yookyung nodded. “We have tutoring class so we can’t go on the weekdays. Do you agree for this Saturday?” She asked the boy beside her.

 

 

Chanyeol thinned his lip. Guilty covered him. He must tell them about his choice but, he didn’t know where to start.

 

 

Not getting any reply from Chanyeol, Yookyung tilted her head. “Chan-ah?”

 

 

“What’s wrong?” Baekhyun touched his arm. Now it was the time. He must tell them right now before they knew it from anyone else.

 

 

“I’m sorry. I can’t. I have an audition on Saturday.”

 

 

Yookyung lifted her left eyebrow. “Audition? What audition?” She didn’t understand what Chanyeol said.  

 

 

Baekhyun seemed to know what he meant. He heard it before, about his friend wanting to attend some school. “So... you are really going to Performing Arts High School?”

 

 

Cha Yookyung glanced at Baekhyun, surprised by what he said because it was her first time hearing this. She then looked at Chanyeol, waiting for his answer. She really wanted to know if Chanyeol really wants to enter a different school because they promised to enter Yongsan High together. They promised to be together for another three years...

 

 

“Yes. I’ll be taking the Performing Arts High School admission. Actually, earlier, I went to the teacher's room to get the recommendation letter. I want to be a musician, so...”

 

 

Suddenly, Yookyung stood up from her seat and left. Seeing her stomp like that, Chanyeol chased after her. “Yookyung-ah!”

 

 

There were not many students in the corridor but it was still difficult to catch her because of bumping into people. He knew her feelings because she’s the one who wanted them to be in the same high school the most. Chanyeol had to chose the path he wanted to become one step closer to his dream and it was at Performing Arts High.

 

 

Finally, before she went downstairs, Chanyeol managed to grab her arm. She struggled from his grip but Chanyeol was stronger than her.

 

 

“Let me go!”

 

 

She was in pain and he knew it by her expression. But he had no choice, he couldn’t let her go. “Hear me first.” His eyes stared at Yookyung seriously and pleadingly. When Yookyung didn’t try anymore, Chanyeol loosen his grip. He sighed, “I’m sorry Yookyung-ah. I was about to tell you about this. But—”

 

 

“Will you still go to a different school even if I begged you not to?”

 

 

Looking at her teary eyes made his heart shake a bit but Chanyeol had made the choice so there was no turning back. “I want to pursue my dream. You know I really want to become a professional musician.”

 

 

“Couldn’t you just go to Yongsan and at the same time try to become a musician?”

 

 

Chanyeol shook his head. “Sorry, Yookyung-ah. I just can’t...”

 

 

With unsteady steps, she took one step closer to Chanyeol and hit his chest over and over again. “Bad boy! You really want to leave me, don’t you?”

 

 

Meanwhile Chanyeol didn’t know what to say and just kept looking at her with a sorrowful expression. However, it was a hard choice for him, he also wanted to be in the same school with them actually. Instead, he couldn’t help and take a different path.

 

 

Like that, Chanyeol chose a different school and for several days, there were times when Yookyung ignored him, making Baekhyun, who was in the middle of them, worried and confused. After sometime, when Yookyung had composed her mind, they got back together again. They’re close friends after all.  Moreover, Chanyeol passed the audition and she had to support and understand him.

 

 

Then, the graduation day came...

 

 

After the ceremony, the class filled with students who were enjoying their last day as a middle schooler. Taking pictures together, writing messages to friends, and changing mementos for the last time. Looking outside the window, Chanyeol and Yookyung stood there, enjoy their last moment together in the school.

 

 

“We won’t be together like this anymore... It makes me sad every time I think about it.”

 

 

Chanyeol glanced at Yookyung. “I’m not going somewhere far. We just go to different schools. We can still meet and hang out together.”

 

 

“Still.. I won’t see you as often as if we are in the same school. We have been always together so I never thought about going to school without you.”

 

 

“Just wait for me.” Hearing his word, Yookyung turned her head to Chanyeol. Their eyes met. “After three years pass, I’ll come to you so we can be together again. Just wait for me.”

 

 

For a few moments, the class felt quiet even though there were many people inside. It's because they couldn't hear any sound and were focused on the person in front of each other. Yookyung opened , “Chan-ah...” she said with a low voice. “What am I to you?”

 

 

He was startled by her question. What was she to him? To be honest, he liked her for a while, not knowing the exact time, but he couldn’t tell her about that. He just couldn’t. “What’s with your question? Of course you’re my childhood friend...”

 

 

“Is that all?”

 

 

His round eyes avoided her stare. Was it alright to tell her? But, what if their relationship broke at the time he told her about his feelings?

 

 

“I’ll ask you again, what do I mean to you?”

 

 

At that time, Baekhyun approached them. “Let’s take a commemoration pic together!” When he saw the two, he felt their strange atmosphere. “What’s wrong?”

 

 

Yookyung just smiled and said “nothing.” She then grab Baekhyun’s and Chanyeol’s arm. “Let’s take the picture!”

 

 

 

 

He snapped out of from the memories in his last year of middle school. Was that what she meant in her message? Was it about that time? If it was so, he’s willing to answer that question right now. He must meet her.

 

 

After getting off the bus, he ran as fast as he could. He couldn’t wait to see her and tell his feelings and maybe it was his chance. It had started raining but he just ran towards the white house. Rain was not an obstacle for him.

 

 

When he arrived at her house, he immediately pushed the bell. There was no time for catching his breath. He tried many times, but there was no answer. It seemed that no one was home at the moment. He leaned on the fence wall and looked at his arloji. She will be home soon, he thought. So he decided to wait for her despite that the rain was pouring.

 

 

Some moment passed and Chanyeol looked at his arloji again. It should be the time, but she didn’t turned up yet. Maybe because of the rain she would be home later than usual. He looked up to the sky, feeling the drops fall on his face. He would wait more. He just had to wait.

 

It had been an hour and the rain had started to stop. And then, he saw her walking under one umbrella with Baekhyun. They were talking happily while sometimes Baekhyun played with her hair and she laughed. At that time, he realized that he was too late. Yookyung was happy with Baekhyun now and he couldn’t interfere in their relationship. Moreover, he was his close friend. Chanyeol turned the opposite direction and left. Even regrets covered himself, he would let his feelings be a hidden love even if it meant forever. 

 

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