Of all my things I miss my phone. I didn't even bring it inside with me. I knew I would just have to pack it up and send it back home along with my civilian clothes. So I know it's not here, but I keep looking for it, reaching for it to check for messages.

When things got really bad in the past, it used to be my lifeline. When I was bored or lonely, it was a way to entertain myself, to goof around and relax. And I do miss chatting with friends…

Talking face to face with strangers—when that's the only option—is so different. People watch me, stare at me, and talking to them takes more effort. Takes more thought than simply typing a message. It becomes more like acting or being interviewed. Voice and tone and expression and body language and policing what you're going to say… is this why I love to text? Because I don't have to take such care with what I say and how I say it? Is this why it's so easy to misread a text? Because it is just words with all the background emotion stripped away?