I can lose myself in music. I've always known that. And the more I learn about music, the easier it becomes to get lost.

I can lose myself on stage… but only sometimes and losing myself performing takes effort. Effort to relax. Effort to let go.

Cooking's another good way to lose myself. Just pottering around, chopping and stirring and tasting, breathing in peace along with fragrant steam. Or doing push-ups. Once you get past the first sixty or so and the pain and effort just morph into… I dunno, a weird zen state.

I didn't think I could find something else to get lost in, but I was wrong. I can actually lose myself pretty effectively on a firing range. Not even shooting, just practising handling a rifle, lining up targets over and over and over. After an hour or so, when everything hurt, my mind seemed to think I was doing push-ups. And then it was just sooooo easy. And peaceful. And almost… effortless.

They said the army teaches you new things about yourself. They certainly weren't wrong.