Hehehe, third chapter up ^V^ I'm so happy that I gained another subscriber! A very big heart hug to AD0RKABL3-A-S-I-A-N! Thank you so much for the first comment of the story :D! It lifted my mood up a lot! I'll work harder for the sake of Can I Be Sure That This Is Love. Hope there'll be more lovers in the future -^v^-6

The time has come, the scene is set, and they are at the beginning line, about to set off :)

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Hmmm…if I’m a cockroach, where would I usually hide myself? Somewhere dark and abandoned where no one will notice? Somewhere with food? Somewhere not so obvious to the eyes of strangers and servants roaming the house?

Aha, the back of the kitchen.

It probably wasn’t such a good idea because of the heat, smell of smoke, oil and spices that were mixed in the air there. But it’s better than meeting people, rich and prestigious people. On a negative perspective, it means the snobby kind that looks down on you, takes advantage and laughs at you when you’re crumbling down.

Well, not all the rich are like that. I mean, I consider myself rich but at the same time not as wealthy when compared to the others. I mean, look at me; I think I’m friendly. The ahjummas and ahjusshis spend a lot of time with me. We chat. Sometimes, we even experiment on food in the kitchen. Chef-ahjusshi’s always creating new recipies with me. I’m a food lover (a little biased toward fried chicken), applying both ‘eat to live’ and ‘live to eat’ principle in my live, but definitely not ‘a moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips’. Life’s wasted when you don’t eat.

Did I mention I love to cook?

Yup, now I’m pulling a garden chair to sit in a spot to enjoy my book, at the same time enjoying the combined fragrance of the ‘just-showered’ flowers and the tempting smell of food.

I’m on the first page, trying to understand word by word. But my head can’t seem to access through the words.

Why, you ask?

The soothing voice that said thanks in the bookshop keeps replaying in my mind.

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The car ride wasn’t silent like always. The boys dared themselves to open up to their father a little this evening, taking advantage of the earlier incident instead of keeping hostile. It wasn’t a scene where only three of the eldest were talking while Taemin and Minho were lost in their own little world. It was still awkward taking part in a conversation which includes all of them, but Soo Bin could see that they were trying.

“So, father who’s this friend that we’re going to visit?”  Taemin asked, tapping his fingers rhythmically on the door of the speeding BMW. Minho looked at his father for an answer. Onew and Jonghyun stopped discussing about school and girls. Curiosity had sparked earlier, but they wanted a resolution as to why their father was more open to them ever since he received the simple invitation letter.

“Yeah, is it someone we’ve met before?” Key joined in, pinning some cuff-link like badges on his outer shirt carefully as to not crumple the material. Lee Soo Bin did not answer at first. Key was starting to feel cautious about the informality. Maybe it was too sudden.

Was father’s friend another woman? They thought.

“His name is Min Shin Hyun. He’s a hyung-like figure to me since we were little but we cut off contacts years ago after his wife passed away…” The words were spoken bitterly.

All were silent for a moment. The boys did not want to force their father to choke his words out. Depression swarmed over his eyes, and they didn’t want to lose him over the usual ‘CEO-like father’ they’ve been living with since forever. Minho decided to break the ice, despite him being like an ice all the while.

“Does he have any children?” Losing a beloved is painful enough, but not being able to share the pain with someone else wouldn’t move the person forward, he thought.

“Yes, he does have an only daughter. I saw her during her mother’s wake. Poor girl, losing her mother at such a young age…” The middle-aged man sighed. Memories of the little girl in black were still fresh in his mind. She did not cry or made a commotion when her mother passed away. Her face remained expressionless during the whole ceremony. 

“Is she pretty?” Jonghyun spoke out of his mind. Not that he judges people by outer appearances; it was just a random question that popped out of his mind.

“Yah, how would father know if the last time he met her was when she was still a child!” Onew elbowed him.

“I suppose so. She was cute when she was young. Her mother was a natural beauty too. She was famous for her ice-princess look during her schooling days.” He chuckled. “She even did modeling for a short time before starting college.”

Shin Min Hyun’s late wife, Lee Na Young was blessed with good-looks that were unparallel with her feisty personality.

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The sky’s darkening with stars starting to peep out one by one. I won’t be able to read my book anymore. Standing up and putting back the chair into its original place, I walked out towards the garden where quite a fair bit of people are chattering around. The men had suits and women wore gowns. I wonder if the men feel hot under those layers of cloth, or the limited movement women have to succumb to under those long and body-hugging materials.

I blended in the crowd like a normal person. Nobody suspected anything including the servants who were busy serving cocktail drinks under the canopy and in the hall. I walked in and out of the location aimlessly. There was no one that I can talk to, and I’m no good at starting conversations because I’m clueless about current issues. I gave up and stood alone near the grand staircase, with the book in my right hand. Occassionally, I’ll flip through the pages, but the chandelier was blinding. They had lit the candles in the garden to brighten up the surroundings but back indoors it was the blinding crystal lights.

Either way, I’m not going to be comfortable reading.

My sharp eyes caught a few girls of I think should be around my age or older gesturing towards me. They whispered among themselves and sniggered. I turn my head away. I don’t like attention. I can still hear vague speaking like “Why is she alone?” or “Why is she wearing that old-fashioned dress?” It wasn’t until I noticed the change in topic into ‘Pradas’ that I walked away eventually.

I sighed, maybe I’m really anti-social.

As soon as I stepped out of the carpeted area, the heels on my feet started to make ‘clack-clack’ noises. People are starting to look at me. What syndrome do you call this? The feeling of wanting to be invisible and not to be seen – stage fright? I don’t know, I can’t socialize as well as a normal person. The people that I talk to are the people that I’d known for at least the last ten years.

I bend my head down and tried running towards the west wing of the hall through the small door. The area there’s near to the store room, and no food tables were set up there. It’ll be quieter. I scolded myself mentally. What is wrong with you? Why do you have to avoid until this extent? Why can’t you open up to people?

The grip of my shoes did not cause enough friction against the surface of the smooth marble floor. I felt my body heading towards left, right, front and back, not knowing where to fall. I tried to grab hold of something to prevent me from falling flat on the ground. In a split microsecond, thoughts like I can’t fall in front of so many people flowed through my mind. My eyes weren’t focusing on the surroundings. At the same time, reality shoved in and I fell.

On something soft.

I opened my eyes a little. My right hand was in contact with the cold floor while the palm of the opposite felt cloth under it. I fell on a person.

It didn’t take long to realize that it was a boy, with his face inches below mind. His breathing was rapid under me, and I can smell the mint coming off his body. He was looking at me with a face of disbelief. My face felt hot suddenly, and my cheeks starting to turn red. I gulped, I had never been this close to a boy before. His arm s around my waist in attempt to get up. I threw myself off him.  

I was rude to not apologize or thank him. Instead, I ran away like a coward after doing something wrong.

He was handsome. So extremely handsome that I had forgotten to breathe.

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Opinions? Who do you think it will be? Jonghyun or Minho XD?