A/N: Inspired by Jessica's instagram post :)

Oh and happy new year my friends <3 2016 will be good!

It was never easy, being a designer. She may be an experienced and a well-known entertainer but she definitely is a no-body in the fashion industry.

Staring at the half-finished design drafts that scattered aimlessly on the coffee table (used to be new song lyrics), she feels like she’s living another life; a life of a designer, a life of a CEO, a life of freedom perhaps? There is significantly more freedom comparing to when she was still an employee – still a member of the group.

‘Good things come with a price, Sooyeon ah.’ Her father used to tell her whenever things are difficult to achieve. She understood and that’s why when her new achievement came with more pressure and stress she didn’t tell anyone, she knew that was the price. There were so many things she had to get accustomed to, so many differences she had to stop herself from frowning at.

She goes into reverie, unconsciously looks back when she has a designer’s block. Most of the times she would be able to pull herself out from those daydreams, mentally slapping herself for delving too far behind; sometimes she just let herself be, drowning and furthermore wishing for an unknown future.

A ring on her phone startles her, “H- hey.”

“Oh you picked up real fast. What are you doing?” From the tone, the person on the other line is definitely smiling.

Feeling glad, she lets out a contended sigh. “Nothing much.”

“Really? Shouldn’t you be busy sketching, my dear designer?”

“Um I was…my dear singer.” She smirks with her comeback.

A husky chuckle soon follows, “Aw Jessi, you’re a singer yourself!”

Jessica smiles but there is this bitter taste in , she thinks she knows why but this is not the time to dwell on it, not when Tiffany is all happy on the line.

Maybe Tiffany senses the momentary pause, she speaks up again, “Um so you were busy sketching but are you doing anything now?”

“No, nothing.” Jessica pushes herself up from the carpeted floor and lies on the sofa, she won’t be sketching anytime now, so.

“That’s great then!”

Just when she wants to ask Tiffany what’s so great about it, her doorbell rings. Groaning, she stalks on to the front door “Tiff hold- ” and yanks it open. “Oh.”

Still holding her phone by her ear, Tiffany grins and waves, “Not happy to see me?”

Jessica says nothing, she instead pulls Tiffany in a tight embrace. She misses this, being able to hold her, to smell her sweet perfume, to feel her body warmth, simply, to be with her.

“So…you are happy to see me.” Tiffany throws an arm around Jessica’s shoulder after the hug, her finger drawing circles on the exposed skin. Jessica blushes at the gesture and her stomach does a somersault.

When both of the girls settle down (so does Jessica’s heart), Jessica remembers, “Don’t you have my spare key?”

“Oh that. I wanted to surprise you!”

Jessica rolls her eyes playfully. “What a, pleasant, surprise.”

Tiffany chuckles and shows her eye-smile, “Come on Jessi, you were thrilled to see me even you said nothing at the door just now.” The brunette wants to retort but a kiss on the cheek stops her. “You’re an open book Honey.”

Jessica wonders, if Tiffany can read her that easily…has she read her heart? Has she read about the love etched so truly madly deeply in that beating organ? And more, was she disgusted by it? What did she think of it?

“Hey. You.” Tiffany snaps her fingers. “What’s going on in your little head?”

“Oh. Nothing. Just- nothing.” Jessica shows her perfect(ly trained) smile.

Jessica promised herself to never lie to Tiffany, but when she has to, she will do all she can to ensure Tiffany doesn’t know because the last she wants to is to hurt her feelings. She will put on her best face, her best smile, her best composure. Most of the time she gets away with it but this time, when Tiffany looks at her longer than usual, like analyzing her, she panics. She has no idea which reason frightens her more; being found out lying right to her face or, being found out gay and in love with her. It doesn’t help that Tiffany is looking right into her eyes, she feels absolutely under the other’s determined gaze and she squirms in her seat.

After a few seconds of horrifying silence, Tiffany sighs and she smiles (sadly?), “Okay.”

Jessica’s heart beats thrice the pace, “Okay- ” she echoes, “Okay?”

“Yea Jessi. Okay. It’s okay.” Tiffany reaches out and puts her hand on Jessica’s thigh, rubbing up and down, soothing her.

Jessica wants to ask what’s okay, as in okay to lie to her face or okay to be gay and in love with her. She doesn’t dare to ask of course, the answer is going to cause her everything, her friendship, her best friend, her feelings, her heart. So she settles for a question, vague but