Kris walked up to the orphanage as coolly as a man possibly could in highheels. Tao was happily skipping alongside him. The panda had claimed that the grasshopper he saw the other day had magical powers. Apparently, it was going to show them the chosen one, the one the couple would have to adopt.

Kris sighed for the millionth time, "Tao, honey, we don't need a kid."

"Yes, we do!" The panda crossed its arms and pouted, "the grasshopper told me we were destined to be elder berries."

"But-"

"No buts!" Tao interrupted, "Now follow me. Or I will beat you into a pulp."

"Now follow me or I will beat you into a pulp." Kris mimmicked under his breath.

"What was that?" Tao glared at the other man.

"Nothing!" Kris whimpered.

"Good." Tao smiled sadistically and continued to walk forward. Kris unwillingly followed him.

*********

Minseok explored the house, riding on a segway. The bun didn't have any nails, therefore he couldn't participate in the spa day that was being held in the bathroom. He had to keep himself busy for a couple hours.

The doorbell rang. Minseok rode the segway up to the door, climbed onto the handle, and opened the door with his little dough hands.

"Oh. My. God." Jonghyun shrieked and picked up the little bun, cradling it protectively, " is he going to be our son too?"

"No. But if he's lucky, he just might become our son in law. From what I heard, he has something special going on with Luhan." Key winked at Minseok.

Minseok turned red.

Jonghyun looked suprised, "Wait- Suho's a lawyer?"

"What? No...Jonghyun, just be quiet." Key hairflipped. He was too perfect to deal with this. Jonghyun started tickling the little bun in his hands, making it giggle.

"He's so adorable!" Jonghyun exclaimed.

Key sashayed to the bathroom and leaned against the wall, his arms crossed, "Baekkie!" He called.

"OMG! Key!" Baekhyun hugged him. The two posed, took a selca, and started discussing various make-up products.

With Minseok on his head, Jonghyun hurried to Key.

Then he saw the deer. His eyes lit up. He ran over to Luhan, pulling him into a tight hug.

" Luhannie! Did you miss me?" Jonghyun kissed the deer's head, "I can't wait to bring you home and enroll you in school and give you cuddles and lots of love and-"

"Jonghyun! Equal love! Remember?" Key reminded.

"Oh. Right...I forgot." The dino man hugged the deer one last time. He walked over to Chen, who was sulking in a corner. "Chen!" He shouted before giving the boy a bone-crushing hug. Chen coughed uncomfortably. His lungs felt like they were dying as Jonghyun squeezed him.

"There. Now can I go back to Luhan? Please?" Jonghyun begged.

"Whatev." Key continued his conversation with Baekhyun.

Sehun watched the whole scene from the window in the bathroom. He threw a mini fit. He hated the dino man for kissing the deer's head. That was supposed to be him. Sehun wanted to go inside and kill the dino with his very, very, dangerous bubble gun, but he was way too tired. He was only five-years-old after all. He needed his naps. The little boy stomped over to a tree and sat down, leaning against it. He fell into a deep sleep, and dreamt about frogs and dinosaurs getting brutally murdered.

********

Kris sat on a bench and watched, non-plussed as Tao search for the grasshopper.

"I don't think its going to show up." Kris sighed, he had a potato chip inspection appointment soon. This was a waste of time.

"We have to look harder!" Tao urged. From the corner of his eye, he saw something moving amongst the blades of grass. "Gotcha!" He exclaimed, walking towards what he thought was a grasshopper. It was an ant. Frustrated, the panda plopped onto the ground.

A very wise looking grasshopper then jumped onto Tao. "Come, young one, let me show you the chosen one."

The grasshopper hopped towards a boy who was on the swings and pointed to him. "His name is Park Chanyeol. Take care of him." With that said, the grasshopper hopped away.

Kris blinked. So the magical grasshopper did exist. Huh.

"Krissy! Lets go!" Tao jumped up and down. He was eager to meet his future son.

Kris grumbled and got up from the bench. He didn't want to walk all the way to the swings...it was too far. "I'm coming."

*****
Chanyeol jumped of the swing and marked the spot where he landed. He had jumped farther than last time.

"Chanyeol!" Someone called from behind him.

Chanyeol turned around, confused. In front of him was a man in high heels wearing nurse's outfit and carrying a panda.

"Uh...how do you know my name?" He asked nervously. They looked sort of like child-predators, especially the cross-dressing giant.

"I'm Tao, and this is my husband Kris." The panda introduced. "A wise old grasshopper told me your name. Apparently, you are the chosen one, meaning we are going to be your elder berries!"

Chanyeol thought for a moment, registering the information into his slow brain.

He nodded his head. It definitely made sense. Very sensible of him to have these nice but creepy people become his parents. Of course a wise grasshopper would find his parents for him. He trusted grasshoppers. Chanyeol smiled widely, his mouth stretched in a odd square shape. 

"Mommy! Daddy!" He said gratefully, before hugging Tao and Kris.

A/N from KeyAngel:

Crack here, crack there, crack everywhere. Tao is the responsible parent in this relationship, considering Kris has a job as a potato chip inspector. And a hooker. But the kind of hooker that re-enacts pirate life. Definitely. *nods rapidly*

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