"Alright guys, I’ll stop us here for today. Please complete the assigned homework and... h-hey let me finish-!" The teacher’s cry was quickly swallowed by shifting papers, clicking pens, and murmurs rising to chatter. The room reanimated as people packed their things, ready to go home. I was still stuck in my seat, staring blankly at the board. It was covered in notes, or I guess chicken scratch since the teacher had unintelligible writing.

My page was nearly filled with notes regardless, but I couldn’t really remember anything that I had written. The entire time I’d been on autopilot, jotting down words as they flew at me. Even now the noise around me now felt faint, a distant ring in my ears I couldn’t make myself bring forward. If I tried focusing my mind would only tip back, away from my surroundings and into darker thoughts.

A ring of people had begun to form around the back of the room, it's contents mostly female. At the centre was two figures. One, a very indifferent looking Sehun. Or maybe just cold, his stoic expression ready to turn frosty with a small provocation. Girls tried approaching him regardless, attempting to thaw the ice prince with wide smiles and small talk. Despite the effort his eyes were glued to the window next to him. It made the figure beside him a ray of sunshine in comparison. That is, if sunshine itself was handsomely charming. Kai pulled off both with ease, talking the students that surrounded them.

My eyes flickered between the two, trying to watch both simultaneously. Without the kingkas nearby acting like beacons for people to hover over it was quieter on my side of the room. A small blessing for the wallflower within me.

“Are you going to go over there?” Nana said, looking up from her notes. No doubt having noticed my not so subtle peaking. I grimaced, turning in my seat to face her.

“No. Uh, how was the club meeting?”

She adjusted her glasses, placing a day planner on top of her stuff. “We made the schedule for the semi-formal. I checked in with the teacher supervisor and picked out cameras to use as well.”

“Aren’t they all basically the same?” I asked, slightly intimidated by her level of preparation.

“You’d think the school would clean and repair the cameras as needed,” Nana all but scowled at her planner, “student use makes some of the cameras worn out. We have to be sure to get the better ones so we can take good pictures.”

“R-right.” I fiddled with my pen, my eyes drifting to the back of the room.

Sehun had been watching me, and didn’t bother to look away when my gaze locked with his. My breath hitched in my throat from surprise, mostly from how intent his gaze was.

Someone could notice, follow his gaze to me and get the wrong idea. I looked away first, heat creeping up my face. Don’t blush. Don’t blush. Don’t blushhhh-

“-is that okay with you?” Nana asked.

“H-huh?”

She gave me a measured look, then turned to the back of the room. If we were actually close friends I would’ve tugged her back. So I had to settle for internal shrieking: Don’t look!

Sehun finally averted his gaze, only for Kai to just notice us. He waved a hand.

Nana turned back to me: “I said your shift is around the midpoint of the dance. Will that work?”

“Of course.” I strived to sound positive, prepared. I wondered what she was thought about the kingkas. Did she see how awkwardly I fit around them, like an outsider?

Nana fixed her glasses again, closing the planner “I have the shift just before you. The student council should be making an address around that time so I’ll cover it. Try and focus on group shots and interesting masquerade outfits.”

“Sure, I’ll do that.”

Having gotten her point across Nana went back to her homework. I turned away too, but the urge to peek at the end row still gnawed at me. Kai had admitted they were hiding something, meaning I had gotten my foot in the door, but it was going to take a lot more to get it wide open. The thought was among many others, and they had me drifting along with the tide of people as I walked out of last period. In what felt like seconds I was in front of my locker, spinning the dial code. Somehow I messed up the combination the first time, then the second. I took a cleansing breath, closing my eyes.

Be calm Lena. You can go home and stay in alone solitude for the rest of the day.

But that didn’t mean I would have mental peace. There was something off about these kingkas and the only solid clue I had were those eyes… maybe the incident with Chanyeol too. I could try to confront them again but I wasn’t going to get far if they decided to stay stubborn. The most frustrating part wasn’t even how they wouldn’t tell me, but how they were still persistent in trying to be nice, or maybe even friends with me. I just had to let them.

The lock finally clicked after the fourth try, the door squeaking quietly when it opened. A body leaned against the one just behind.

“Can we talk?” Sehun asked quietly. His eyes were on the side of my face, waiting for me to turn.

“About what?” I busied myself ping my bag, pulling out some textbooks. I hadn’t noticed him while I was walking here, but it wasn’t a surprise to see him pop up now. It was starting to feel like a habit of theirs, appearing when I least expected it.

“The conversation we had earlier.” He continued. I fumbled with one of the books as I set it down and it landed with a bang. I winced.

“I thought you couldn’t say anything.”

“I can’t.” A tiny knot was in his brow “but it’s not like I don’t want to.”

Figures.

I closed the door, jabbing the lock into place with a bit more force than necessary. He matched my rushed steps down the corridor with long measured ones. Another note to add to my list of things kingkas did that irked me.

“What does that even mean?” I said in an undertone as people passed close by. “Are you not allowed to?”

“More or less.”

Once we reached the common area the crowd expanded out into the wide space. As less bodies hovered I tried again: “Who’s the one that decides for you then? It’s your issue-”   

Something in his expression made me stop. His jaw was working, like he was trying to find the right words to explain, but there were none. The crease in his brow was getting deeper, like he felt bad, guilty even.

I took a breath, continuing on more quietly “This has to do with me doesn’t it? Why can’t I know?” More silence from him. It made me push forward. “It’s not contacts or anything like that. Do you guys have some kind of medical condition? Is it contagious?” All signs seemed to point to yes, and yet it only seemed to exist within their kingka group.

“You could say that.” Something crossed his expression, but then it was gone a moment later. “It’s not something you need to worry about.”

“Then why does it feel like I’m some sort of trigger for it.”  

“In a way you are.” Even without golden eyes his gaze was enough to hold me still. I couldn’t find the will to counter him again, and so we ended up taking a seat at some nearby benches. It was quiet for a bit, each of us collecting our thoughts.

“I want to hear what you think, you have to have some theories.”

I looked at him out of the corner of my eye “Nothing that makes sense.”

“Like magic?” He offered, the ghost of a smile on his lips, maybe from bad humor.

“I was thinking more of a cult.” Instantly I bit my lips. The words had popped out of my mouth before I could censor them. He laughed, but it was a sad sound.

I winced, “I’m sorry. I take that back-” That was sacrilege by fangirl standards. One would have annihilated me on the spot for that.

“No, I probably deserve it. We’re not being fair anyways.”

“Can’t you just give me some hints? Something to help me understand things better.”

He shook his head. “Just believe me when I say we’re not trying to hurt you.”

The kisses immediately came to mind, Kai and Chanyeol swimming on the backs of my eyelids. And yet those two didn’t get the memo.

“We’re not trying to trick you or anything like that. It’s more of the opposite actually. We want to help.”

Confusion furrowed my brow What made you think I need it? The queenkas?

“Thanks nice, but I don’t think I really need help. If anything it’s like-” My phone vibrated in my hand, nearly startling me. The screen blinked to life but I covered it with my palm. The vibrate continued twice, messages coming in one after another.

“You should probably get that. It looks important.” He leaned back slightly, giving me space.

It can’t be Ha ri, she’s not even off from work yet.

It wasn’t her, but someone else I hadn’t been expecting.

> Hey!

  Where’d you go?

I stared blankly at Xulian texts. Of all times NOW is when you decide to respond to me?!

Classes were over, so he decided to attack with a vengeance.

> And you think I’m the worst at responding =_=

  I haven’t heard from you in an entire week

  You’re okay right?

Mumbling another apology to Sehun I quickly opened the keyboard to reply.

> Yeah I am, I’ve just been out of the city for a while…I’ll explain later.

“A friend of yours?” Sehun asked. I clicked off the screen, placing the phone flat on my leg.

“W-well yes.” Did Kingkas ever go on the school’s chat room? It felt awkward to try and explain.

“Were you going to meet them right now?”

“No uh, he’s just saying hi.”

The silence hit us again. I could feel the vibration of another message and held my phone just a bit tighter. So Sehun wouldn’t sense the disruption twice.

“You could’ve waited for me.” A voice came from just behind us, making me turn. Kai leaned in, his arms crossed over the low brick ledge behind the bench. He gave Sehun a particularly sour look.

“It looked like you were busy. I didn’t want to interrupt.”

I bit my inner cheek at the reminder of the fangirls at their desks. He probably enjoyed it too.

“I would’ve gotten out of there faster if you didn’t ditch me.” Kai pointed out. Sehun looked like he was about to scoff but was interrupted.

“Hey guys.” Lay walked up, but he wasn’t alone. I shifted awkwardly, eyeing the quiet figure standing a pace back. Like this morning Chanyeol was mute, but attentive. He met my gaze head on, even trying to bring his lips into a tentative smile.

“Hi.” His voice was calmer now, and I could hear the low pitch it had.

“H-hi.” Stupid stutter. I fumbled to get my backpack straps over my shoulders “Uh I should start heading home.” I mumbled quickly, my face warming. Secrets or not, I was still unbearably embarrassed and uncomfortable around this new sunbae.

“We can walk you out.” Lay offered.

“Y-you guys don’t have to, I can go-”

“Could you stay for a minute?” Chanyeol jumped in, surprising us both. But Chanyeol was looking at me directly, his gaze clear and intent.

“Huh? What is it?” I said. I couldn’t keep the stutter from my voice, a rush of nerves skimming across my skin.

“I uh, well-” His cheeks slowly dusted with pink “My name’s Chanyeol.” He said suddenly. I could only blink in surprise. “I didn’t really introduce myself earlier, so I thought I’d uh, do that now.” A laugh escaped his lips, but there was unsurety in it.

He’s...nervous, because of me?

“Um, I-”   

“You guys are still here too?” A voice called. Mun Hee appeared with a small entourage of 2nd and 1st years gathered behind her. Seol was just at her side, a second in command to the group. My stomach dropped through the floor. It was the second time today, and neither felt so little like a coincidence. I was probably lucky to have gone this long without so much time without having them hover around, but that could only have been temporary. Still, a part of me hoped intensely this was not going to become habitual. my chances at escape just falling along with it.   

Why does this happen right when I want to leave?

“We should all head out together.” Mun Hee suggested, her eyes flickering to the kingkas, then me expectantly. As if I also had some say in the decision. Seol made no real note of me again, a smile lifting her lips only when she noted Sehun. In a way it was understandable; I was not insignificant enough to the kingkas to be treated as a bystander, but the last thing she wanted was be to treat me like an equal. Disregard seemed to be the last option, who knew how long that’d work as long as I was present.

I opened my mouth automatically, but of course no sound would come out. Thankfully (for once) there was a familiar voice ready to overtake my own.

“Why the heck are you guys still here?” Jae Hwa waltzed his way to the front out of seemingly nowhere, then slung a friendly arm over my shoulder. “Let’s go!”

The rest of the group had no problem obliging, sweeping us along towards the entrance doors. It was all I could do to keep up, slightly overwhelmed by the talking and giggles surrounding me.

I wasn’t a wallflower in the midst of this chaos, but one of its centres of attention.

“Hey I heard you left the country last week!” A girl with french braids nudged my arm. She had a friend with glitter shadowed eyelids latched on her arm. “Japan right?”

“Yeah.” My voice sounded dead compared to her girlish tone, but I couldn’t muster anything upbeat to my demeanor. Inside my gut clenched tighter and tighter each time I heard a click of come from their shoes. Not heels but platforms, a lesser version meant to follow the signature of  their almighty queenkas. These girls were queenka minions.

The one with braids clasped her hands together “That must’ve been like, so fun. I have a cousin that lives there with my uncle. She tells me the blossoms around this time of year are sooo gorgeous.” She explained animatedly. Her friend jostled her arm.

“She just went there so she already knows, right Lena sunbae?”

Sunbae? They’re first years? And yet they could probably claw a third year athlete to death if provoked. Hadn’t some already tried to get me the day I ran into Sehun? What if the same girls were in this group, friendly and bubbly now that I was no longer a threat?

“Did you get to do a lot of sightseeing?” the one with glitter shadow prodded. I struggled between actually meeting her gaze or facing straight ahead.

“N-no, not really.”

“Then what’d you do, sleep the week away?” Jae Hwa snorted.

In a daze I replied without thinking “We were at a resort most of the time-”

“A resort?!” He exclaimed “You must be rich!”

“What? N-no I’m not-” Don’t. Do. This. To. Me.

“I can’t believe you haven’t treated me yet!” He sighed dramatically. “After all I do as your sunbae-!”

“We’re the same age.” I cut in impulsively. The words were said through my teeth, but the girls caught them regardless and fell into giggles.

“Ouch, poor sunbae~”

He gestured between us to them. “You see how cold she is? We’re friends, but she’s so sassy towards me.”

I felt the girls looking at my face, but I focused on boring holes into the side of his head.

That’s what I thought too. Then you helped throw me in this popularity ditch.

I had to follow his pace to not hold up the rest of the group. Mun Hee and Seol were just a step behind with the kingkas, but they were also close enough to hear and catch every fumble I made. In a way Jae Hwa’s relaxed demeanor was an indirect cover for my stiffness. His mouth was enough for multiple people, so I didn’t have to keep up much more of the conversation.

He talked us all the way there, with the occasional back and forth from the minions and others around us. I heaved an internal sigh of relief when we neared the glass doors and courtyard beyond.

But then it was halted by Jae Hwa’s next words: “Anyone up for the arcade?”

“Yes!” Someone on the right exclaimed, bubbling up the excitement within the group. Everyone was giving murmurs of approval, thrilled at the possibility of having kingkas tag along. Seol showed a little grin, crossing her arms behind her back. She was just as excited as the others, but social hierarchy made her more conscious of appearances. It was okay to react, just not as much as the others nearby. Mun Hee seemed composed too as she looked between Lay and Chanyeol.

“I know a place. They have a karaoke bar too.” She offered with a smile, and was rewarded with polite smiles from them both. Sehun was as stoic as ever; as the group slowed he gradually came forward, walking in between me and the two minions. Both their eyes widened excitedly at the new addition, but he remained mostly unaware of their steady attention.

“It’ll be super fun sunbae, you guys definitely need to come.” The one with braids said, her voice going a tad soft and breathy. With him she was careful to keep a thin rim of space, a wise safety precaution. Her friend was silent, too intimidated to say a word herself but nodded along regardless.

I watched out of my peripherals, silently pleading: Say no. Say no. Say no.

“I’m busy today. We all are.” Sehun said shortly. The girls’ faces dropped like deflated balloons.

Jae Hwa snorted at their reactions: “No need to look so depressed.”

A new figure slided into our line, catching onto his words. “There’s nothing wrong with a little break.” Seol laced her fingers together in front of her. She turned to Sehun, her head cocked to the side a hint as she looked up at him. “You guys should relax a little, we can all study together afterwards if that works.”

Just a couple days ago she had had me by the hair, ready to smack me into oblivion. The sharp contrast with the Seol next to me now was disturbing.

“Yo, Lena-ah.” Jae Hwa waved a hand in my face “You look a little green.”

“H-huh? No I don’t.” I denied, looking straight ahead. Internally I was beginning to panic, trying to come up with a convincing excuse to get out of the situation. I was naturally a terrible liar. The kingkas could already read through me before I uttered a word sometimes which was bad enough, but it’d be something uncomfortable if that happened with queenkas too. I’d be even more vulnerable in front of them by being caught.

A pair of hands landed lightly on my shoulders, and out of the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of dark brown hair. “Not today guys.” Kai apologised. He pushed me forward, breaking us away from the group. “We have stuff to do.”

“We do?” I echoed. Sehun raised a brow at my surprise, but his eyes had a particular look to them: Go along with it.

“You do? Actually?” Jae Hwa said incredulously.

“I can be a productive student.” Kai defended, matching the latter’s tone. Protest roses but Kai held them off good naturedly “It’s Mr. Im’s class, he can smell procrastination a mile away.” Murmurs of distaste and sympathy rose instantaneously. Even Mun Hee wrinkled her nose a little. Seol just blinked, she probably had no experience with the teacher.

Kai looked at me: “Someone’s been missing for a while. We need to catch you up.” I tried to smile along, play the role of sheepish.

“We’ll pray for your grades.” Jae Hwa mock saluted. A couple people gave half hearted good byes. I caught sight of Lay over my shoulder.

“See you later.” He mouthed. Chanyeol just looked up, slightly torn between the people still trying to keep the remaining kingkas with them. It almost seemed like he would try to say something, but nothing came from him, the others too pressing.

Seol wasn’t ready to give up yet: “You guys could always start later, this’ll be really fun.” Her eyes flickered to me. Maybe by accident, but they remained there a couple moments longer. It made me wish to be invisible to her again. “There’s no reason why not.”  

To my surprise Sehun responded to her: “We set this up a while ago so there’s no reason to cancel.” And for the second time today I was herded away by the two youngest kingkas, straight through the entrance doors. The smell of damp cement and soil hit my nose, remnants of the earlier rain. The air was cool and humid, almost refreshing as we blended into the clusters of people walking down the cobblestone pathway. With just the three of us it was now abruptly quiet, so much so I could feel awkwardness pressing down onto my shoulders.

“U-uh, is it okay to leave them there?” I asked, gesturing back to the school.

Sehun looked back “Lay hyung and Chanyeol hyung will be fine.”

Kai was a bit sheepish “They probably have other things to do, so they’ll leave the group when they get the chance. But it might’ve been better to take them with us.”

“You were so fast they didn’t have a chance to get ready to move.” Sehun flicked the hair out of his eyes, seemingly unamused.

Eventually we reached the end of the path. It opened there, diverging into two roads heading north then eastwards. The second was my usual route; a block and a half down there was a bus stop, or I could take my time and walk the rest of the way home.

“Are you hungry?” Kai asked, snapping me out of my inattention. He pointed towards the north road. “There’s a noodle shop nearby. We could go there.”

I simply blinked at him “Huh?”

“That place is expensive.” Sehun pointed out. I turned, but they were a step ahead and didn’t notice.

“Well what about that tteokbokki1place?”

“We won’t be productive there.”

“Eating well will help us do work.”

Sehun rolled his eyes a little “Half the time you say that we just end up wondering around.”

I stopped in my tracks, my voice coming out more shrill then I intended “You guys were serious about working?!”

They both turned back. Kai’s signature grin appeared in seconds “Of course, did you think I was lying?”

I thought it was an excuse to leave those guys!

“It’ll only be for a little bit.” Sehun said “And now’s a good time as ever to start the project.”

The protests within me quickly rose up “I’m not sure t-that’s a good idea-” It was rare for me stay out after school, much less for things like food or shopping. The off hand time I did, it would be after going home, changing, and dragging Ha ri along with me.  

“Why not?” Kai’s brows raised, but it was with humor “We are pretty behind. I know some guys that’re already done research and are setting up their presentations.”

But why do we gotta meet outside of school for this?! The library works just as much if not better!!!

It felt odd, letting my time around the kingkas extend outside of school hours, even though there was a decent premise. Other groups in a similar situation would simply divvy up tasks and work alone.

“There’s a cafe nearby if that works better. The coffee’s good.” Sehun suggested.

A wallflower having coffee with kingkas? The thought almost made me laugh There are countless ways I could embarrass myself in that situation.

And yet it was being placed right in front of me, with two people to push me in.

I laughed, awkwardly pitched and unsure “W-what if we run into those guys on they way? Maybe it’d be better to j-just start this stuff at lunch tomorrow-”

“Hang on.” Kai stopped my backpedalling, the mischievous gleam back in his eyes. It was still inherently charming, and able to make so many girls swoon.

I tried to counter it with an even one: “My aunt’s expecting me.” Or she would be, in a little over an hour from now. Something told me Kai caught onto the fib. Or maybe he didn’t, and he was just trying to push against it.

“Come on Lena-ah, give us just a half hour.”

I crossed my arms over my chest, feeling my face warm. Maybe from panic, maybe from the intent scrutiny, waiting for the crack in my defense. Spending time with them this way was like letting them get a step nearer to my safety zone. Not going over, but close enough to make the butterflies swarm my chest. I couldn’t decipher the feeling, only knowing that it made me nervous.

This is not a nice idea. Stuff like this is what sparks a chain reaction of events and drama. Nope, not gonna do it-

“Time’s up.” A hand slipped into my own, pulling me forward. I had no time to react, just with a shallow gasp of surprise. The silver haired head in front of me turned. “I’m taking that quiet as a yes. Let’s go.”  Sehun’s eyes were warm, speaking in ways that his expression often lacked.

My mouth opened instinctively, but no protest came out. His pace was even but his longer strides made mine need to be quicker; I couldn’t dig my heels in to stop.

Sehun wasn’t the bold one; the person before me now was a surprise, but then familiar. My mind flashed back to the fuzzy haze of a week ago dream, with golden eyes and messy silver hair. My heartbeat thudded against my ears but I frantically pushed it down, staring straight ahead, feeling my hand in his own.

~~~

Notes:

1 tteokbokki: spicy rice cakes

Hey lovely readers~ how’s everyone doing? (Hopefully good since summer is getting close!!!)

Thank you for your patience and if you liked this update please let me know by subscribing, commenting, or upvoting^^.

Until next time!

*Throws confetti cause why the heck not*

Bye!