“Uh, hello?” A girl’s voice sounded, sharp and scrutinizing.

I started up. “Yes,” five pairs of eyes stared back. I bit back a hot flash of embarrassment, gripping my pen and notebook tighter. “S-sorry. Um, what was that?”

“Chill, Nana. She’s probably still sleepy.” The boy across from me said cheekily, crossing his arms behind his head. “We all are.” It was true, the majority of us slumped over in our chairs, sleep deprivation painfully clear on our faces.

School didn’t start for a solid hour, and it was this early in the morning on wednesdays (and sometimes fridays) that spelled the gathering of the school’s photography club. Normally clubs were supposed to convene during lunch, break, or after school. But we were the group that had to work around them, documenting club activities and school events. As such it was the club’s president  that came up with the idea we meet before school started. It felt like a good plan. At first, to him.

I shifted forward in my seat, tapping my foot softly on the ground in hopes the action would keep me awake.

“I know Jae Hwa.” Nana rolled her eyes, pushing her glasses up on her nose before regarding our president. “But we still need to organize ourselves for this month’s upcoming events.” As the vice president Nana had a much better handle on the club’s workload. It was a thankful balance against Jae Hwa carefree personality and eccentric ideas. Together with them, we made up the group of second years in the club.

“This wouldn’t be such an issue if we just met up in the middle of the day like everyone else prez.” Jihyuk, a first year, muttered. A massive sports duffle bag laid at his feet, and he had one side of his face smushed into the desk’s table top. Jae Hwa leaned over, flicking the latter’s head with a distinct clack.

“Too late~ most rooms have already been claimed by the other clubs. The only space and time slot we got is right now!” He made a wide sweep with his arm about the room. Empty and silent. “Besides, don’t you guys like the peace?”

“There are many other things I think we’d like more than just peace.” The only other first year, Choon Hee, spoke. She wrapped her slim arms around her tiny frame, her delicate features twisted into a look of dissatisfaction. “Like heating.”

Dong sun, the sole third year student and eldest member of the club, answered her as he shifted in his chair. “They won’t turn it on until a half hour before class starts.” He pulled out a blanket from his bag, wrapping it around himself. “Wake me up when this is over.”

“Hey! Stay awake sunbae,” Nana barked, swatting her notebook at his head. “We need to discuss!” It was only her and Jae Hwa that seemed unaffected by the early hour.  

“Right!” Jae Hwa leaned forward in his chair “as Nana means to point out, we have an exciting couple weeks up ahead!” Maybe it was from the lack of sleep, or how happily he spoke, but I just really didn’t want to agree with him.

Damn you early rising Jae Hwa.

“In two weeks time,” he held up to fingers as if to emphasize his point “it’ll be June, and from there everyone’s going to be focusing on summer vacation-”

“And the final exams for the end of the term.” Jihyuk intervened, looking up with a sullen expression.

Dong Sun patted his head, but an equally unhappy expression was on his face. “At least you’re not in your senior year.”

“That’s true, you’re more screwed than the rest of us right sunbae?” Choon Hee smirked,

Jihyuk chimed in, giving the third year a knowing look. “Don’t even bother going for the extended studies program hyung, it’ll be too embarrassing.”

“What the hell do you two know?! I could make it!” Dong Sun’s glare was vicious “Watch me get accepted, then you’ll be eating your own words!!!”

I couldn’t help but grimace at the volume if his voice. Truthfully though, Choon Hee and Jihyuk had a valid point. After the basic three years of high school were done there was the standard options of post secondary universities and colleges to choose from. The process of examinations and applying was stressful and daunting, just as it would be in any other high school. The only difference we had here was the extended studies program.

The name was vague enough, but basically it was like a post secondary institution, a university. The facilities we had in the school’s main building were extensive enough to be useful to them, but extended studies students had their own separate building to go to on campus. I didn’t know anyone who was currently studying in that building, but apparently the vast majority were focused in business and engineering majors. Compared to us the university was much smaller, only housing a couple hundred students. As such their course options were more restricted.

The process to get in was much more simple than any other post secondary. You needed to fill in an application, then take the entrance exam. Only students at this school were given the opportunity to apply, which supposedly cut down on the competition. Still, the school was nearly impossible to get accepted into.     

“And if you don’t you’ll be eating your own words sunbae.” Choon Hee retorted, sporting a grin. Jae Hwa quickly clipped on before Dong Sun could speak. “Riiight, so before we all start freaking out tests the student council has decided to throw together a school dance to celebrate the coming of summer!”

“Because that will help anything.” Nana muttered, scribbling furiously in her notebook. I began writing too, taking down the details as they went flying.

“A dance? What’s the theme?”

“It’s supposed to be a formal one this time around. I heard we may be going masquerade.”

“Masquerade? What, you mean like with masks and ?”

“Don’t swear!”

“The details haven’t been announced yet, but I got word that people will be setting up the posters either today or tomorrow around the school.”

“If it turns formal don’t we have to dress up?”

“No sunbae we’ll wear swimsuits and goggles.”

“Shut up Ji-”

“It’ll be great, especially considering the fact that student council thought to do this for the tired out students of the school.”

“I think you mean to refer to your precious Suho sunba-”

“Shut it Jihyuk, tell me you aren’t thinking about any of the queenkas on the council.”

“I wasn’t-”

Nana smacked her notebook on the desk in front of her. “GUYS.” We froze. That did little to help temper the annoyed look on her face. “Let’s not get off track here.”

Choon Hee recovered first, fixing the latter with a pout “come on unnie. Aren’t you at least a little bit excited?”

“I will once we have a plan going into this.” she stared with an eyebrow raised. “This is a pretty big event. There are very few dances that go on at this school, even less that are formal. Student council wants us there to take some photos.” And when Nana said that, it meant she intended to document the entire night.

“Uh, do we all have to? Cause this is a pretty big night,” Choon Hee murmured, looking at her nails. She was faking nonchalance and we all knew it.

It was big. And it was important. Simply because the people here took the whole occasion to an entirely new level. A venue would be chosen, and then a theme would be decided on by student council. People put real effort into everything - clothes, hair, makeup - because it was one of the rare opportunities to draw attention to yourself. One of the handful of times in the year the student body converged into one mass. High school and extended study students all put together. Anything could happen, monumental or catastrophic, with the right words and the right actions.

“Don’t get your hopes up Choon Hee. No kingka is going to hit on you,”Jihyuk remarked bluntly. A swift pencil case to the face was his response.

“Don’t use Lena-ah’s stuff to hit him, Choon.” Nana snatched the fallen object off the table, ignoring Jihyuk’s cries of pain. “Take out your own book and hit him with it.” I took the case from her hands, muttering a thank you.  

Though silly sounding out loud, it could very well be the wish of a majority of the girls at this school. The idea was daunting, but deliciously tempting; to defy the prestige of the queenkas and be swept away by a handsome kingka.

Still, it didn’t feel like the wish would get her anywhere good. There had been a dance similar to this last year, and the results weren’t all that miraculous. With all that effort made somehow the whole event would become the starkest display of the social hierarchy in this school. Everyone would look good, but it was the ones with the power of popularity - the kingkas, and the queenkas - who drew attention to themselves. Not a single outsider could intervene. How would this year be any different?

Choon Hee gave a coy glance around the circle, her expression unseeming.“Why don’t only a few of us take the photos and give the others the night off?”

“Great, you and Jihyuk can do the documentary and the rest of us will have fun.” Dong Sun grinned. Both first years started up in their seats, immediately alarmed.

Jihyuk spoke first, his expression baffled “Hyung! Why do we have to cover that night? And by ourselves-”

Choon Hee immediately cut in, the sweetness in her voice vanishing in an instant “This is our first dance of the year sunbae! We can’t be stuck working!”

Jae Hwa leaned back in his chair, rubbing his chin. “Why not? It’s not like you’re going to be taking pictures the whole night. Besides Dong Sun and I did the entrance ceremony and Nana does handles our scheduling plus a bunch of other stuff I’m not even sure is actually necessary for this team-”

“It is very necessary Jae Hwa.”

“-right right. I’m just messing with you.” He waved at her with an exaggerated hand “Then that leaves Lor-ah”

“It’s Lena.” I muttered.

He gave me a cheeky grin, waving my comment away too. “Riiight, just messing with you too.”

Liar. Ugh, stupid Jung Jae Hwa.

“As I was saying Lena-ah has been making the rounds for introductory shots of the clubs. That leaves you two to pull some weight-”

Jihyuk clung to the latter’s arm “Come on sunbae, anything thing but this!”

A string of whining arguments ensued. It may have continued for quite a while too, that is, if we didn’t have Nana.

“EVERYONE SHUT UP.” Perfect silence. I cleared my throat, deciding now was a good time as ever to intervene.

“Um, why don’t we all just take part? We’ll be able to cover more ground that way and finish early, r-right?” Stupid stutter.

“Hm, you do have a point Lor- I mean, Lena-ah.” Jae Hwa stopped, an expression of what looked like focus drawing on his features. Then again, I knew better to get my hopes up.

“Of course we’re going to have to spend a considerable amount of time at it to get a good range of shots, but that’d be the best course of action.” Nana mused.  

Jae Hwa slumped in his chair, at ease. “Let’s sleep on it for today.” Not the greatest response, but from him it was enough.

“Thank. You.” Choon Hee swerved to me, her eyes sparkling. I smiled awkwardly back.

“No problem, I think.”

“To be honest I thought it’d be you trying to get out of club work.” We both turned back at Jae Hwa voice. He started at us both, a peculiar grin on his face.

“W-why me?” I said, surprised.

He crossed his arms over his chest, an all-knowing look spreading on his features. “You’re friends with Sehun and Kai now, that’s why.”

The silence after the comment was too painfully short.

“The girl in that rumor is you?!” Choon Hee screeched, shaking my arm “Why haven’t you said anything to me about this?!”

“It didn’t seem that important earlier-!” I said, voice wobbling from the shaking. Dong Sun and Ji hyuk gaped at me, their eyes like saucers.

Jae Hwa just kept adding fuel to the flames “You three seemed really close when I saw you. Wait, but you know Lay too don’t you?”

“W-well, no. Yes. Wait-”

“I thought we were friends unnie!” Choon Hee cried dramatically “Of all the things you could hide from us-”

“Enough Choon Hee, you’re being ridiculous.” Nana cut her off, adjusting her glasses. The latter swerved to face her, an exasperated look breaking on her face.

“How are you so calm about this? Did you know?!” A slight pause.

“They showed up to class together. I happened to see-”

“YOU BETRAYED US TOO UNNIE! WHY?” Chatter burst up between everyone; bewilderment, and excitement mixed together in one heap. Though Choon Hee’s hand remained clasped over my arm I soon forgot about it. The group always ended up being noisy, this was no different occurrence. It wasn’t hard for my mind to start drifting. The words printed in my notebook hazed slightly, my thoughts floating away to a certain one. The memory of the day being questioned.

  ~~~Rewind~~~

Suho-sshi walked away so quickly, the waves of people swallowing him up almost instantly. I paused, waiting until his lean form disappeared. Making it almost as if he had never been here.

“Looking at something?” Kai leaned to one side, purposely side stepping in front of me. It was like he had popped up out of nowhere.

I crossed my arms, smiling lightly to the floor. “Nothing.” Lay and Sehun both had turned around, coming towards where we were standing. “Which way are you headed sunbae?” I asked the former softly. It didn’t feel right to just make him follow along. He was so quiet, I couldn’t really tell how he felt about me being around.

He met my gaze briefly, his expression still. “Same as you,” He gestured down the corridor, the opposite direction to where Suho sunbae had gone.

“Okay.” He wasn’t cold or unkind, but unlike with Sehun and Kai there was an awkwardness in talking with him. It didn’t feel like he was just reserved; at some points I felt like he was shy, but then within the lapses of silence he went into I couldn’t help but wonder if it was just that.

We drifted along with the tide of people. By now it had become the slightest bit congestive, everyone converging at the same time, making the area feel more narrow. Though it wasn’t all that slow paced, I didn’t have to duck or avoid any jostling. None of the kingkas moved far away enough for that to happen.

Without even saying a word people recognized I wasn’t just another passerby surrounding their admired princes; somehow I was supposed to here, walking next to them. It made me different, someone close to them. That was enough to create space, or as much as possible in the situation. A thin barrier divided us from the crush of people. With it, the air didn’t feel so warm; not a single bag or shoulder hit my sides and I could study the area around me with ease. Not like I would be anytime soon. I still wasn’t comfortable enough enjoy the little comfort.

Thankfully we weren’t that far from the second year classrooms, and after a couple moments of weaving around 2-B came into view. Lay slowed behind us as we neared the door. It looked like he was going to leave all together, but when I turned back he paused. We stared at each other a moment.

I wanted to speak, send him off with something other than the uncomfortable silence I seemed to create. But there was nothing clever I could think of. In the end it was Sehun who spoke for us.

“His class is that way.” He pointed farther down the corridor. “See you later hyung,”

The latter nodded, hitching his bag higher on his shoulder.

“You’re hand-” The words left my lips, surprising it all. Lay looked to his clenched fist. A thick white bandage covered the side of his palm, gauge wrapped tightly over top.

“I was practicing martial arts. It’s only a scratch.” The bandages said otherwise. I studied his face, trying to see any hint of discomfort or pain. Surprisingly, my pause made him react. His eyes fluttered downward, his hand going up to his neck. “Really, don’t worry about it.”  

I looked away too, trying to ignore the wave of awkwardness.

“O-okay then. It looked like it hurt is all.” The fact that he didn’t seem like the type of person to have something like martial arts as his hobby made it all the more worrisome too. Something passed through his eyes when I said that, I couldn’t decipher what. It went by so quickly I couldn’t be sure what it was. Maybe just emotion that wasn’t supposed to show.

“Not anymore. It’s fine now.” Then he was gone, lost among the mass of people. I watched the direction he left, confused and frustrated. I didn’t say anything out of place. It didn’t feel like I did. But his reactions made me want to question - and kick - myself.

“Coming?” Sehun was still here, waiting. I followed him inside, still lost in thought. Lay never really said anything unless I spoke to him, which had always caused me to believe he really wasn’t comfortable around me. At the same time it felt like he paid careful attention to me too; he had been analyzing me, just like his friends do every time I open my mouth or shift an inch.

“Where did you guys go? We’ve been waiting for you,” I started up at the voice, partially from its volume, then bubbliness. I knew no one personally who talked like that, but I could point out many would did that were very scary.

A couple of paces away was Kai. A half ring of people surrounded him, the majority female. One in particular was positioned the slightest bit closer, and immediately stepped up at our approach. Her heels clicked distinctly on the tiled floor. “Was that Lay sunbae?” I looked away, an abrupt wave of discomfort hitting me that was infinitely worse than before. They weren’t here for me, but for the kingkas I was with. That wasn’t a surprise.

A hand pushed against my bag, going forward. “Go sit down.” I had no trouble obliging Sehun, almost grateful he was nudging me out. It was one thing to know them, but I didn’t want to be pulled into their circle so easily. Especially with the overpopulation of queenka.

“Hang on,” I froze. The bright voice lowered. A series of clicks sounded and before I knew it there was a girl standing in front of me. “You,” I didn’t respond, my voice caught within my throat. I just stared. She stared back, her gaze going over me once, twice. Unlike yesterday, she had her expression in check. “You’re the one from lunch, right? The one that fell.” So she remembered. My stomach twisted, a shot of fear going through me. Her gaze was intent, as if trying to read me like a book.

Kai stepped a bit closer, inserting himself into the conversation “Do you need something from Lena-ah?” I stared at him, dumbfounded at the lack of honorific.

Why would you call me that? It’s too familiar sounding!!!!

It was one thing to talk like that when it was private, but why now, with so many people in hearing range?!

“Lena-ah?” The queenka murmured, a distinct undertone of slight disbelief in her voice. Her eyes were wide, but that was the only thing in her expression that revealed her surprise. The others nearby were less discreet.

“You’re friends with them?” I flinched at the abrupt question. Within the crowd of people were various expressions of shock, bewilderment, or even just plain disbelief. A pair of boys were sitting on the tops of their desks. One in particular was especially surprised, his mouth popped open. “Like, seriously? That wasn’t a joke?” I wanted to wince at the volume of his voice. It bounced off the walls of the room, as if making sure to catch everyone’s attention.

“We aren’t that bad at making friends. Not like you Jae-Hwa.” Laughter sounded through the group, the said boy the loudest. He scratched the back of his head, grinning broadly at Kai, then at me.

“I’m not that bad sunbae~ These guys still like me.” Protests immediately drowned him out. The air was rowdy and playful, jokes and teasing comment flying back and forth. I watched, never feeling so out of place. There was nowhere to insert myself; all I could do was stand, a polite smile plastered on my face. These people weren’t all that familiar to me, I couldn’t be comfortable around them.

“Sehun explained that already.” The queenka’s voice was quiet, but it managed to catch the attention of nearly half the group. It didn’t feel like the she was comfortable either. Her smile was vague, her eyes never straying from me. “You three must be close. How come I’ve never seen you around?” Around them? The end of her question hung clear between us. I swallowed hard, fighting the urge to blurt the truth and save myself. I just met them yesterday!

“Can’t say, it’s been awhile.” Kai chuckled, looking at me with crescent eyes. He shoved his hands in his pockets, and our arms brushed “We just haven’t kept track of time.”

“That’s so cheesy sunbae!” A wave of chuckles and whines ensued, all light hearted and giddy. The queenka lost her smile completely. I looked away, focusing on the point of a desk, my desk. Why couldn’t I be there and not here? Was Kai really trying to help, or was he just here to add fuel to the blaze?!

“About yesterday, sorry about my friend. She misunderstood the situation.” The queenka regained her ground, addressing me directly. The crown of my head tingled, the memory of it being tugged still distinct and fresh.

“If she was sorry wouldn’t she come and say so herself,” The comment wasn’t biting. But something of Kai’s tone made a twinge shoot through me. It was subtle, unnoticed by the students around us. The queenka visibly straighten.

“Seol-ah would, off course. She’s just not at school today.”

She’s the one who led those minions to beat me up. The thought made goosebumps rise on my arms. Was the reason she wasn’t here because of that?

“Anyways Kai-ah,” The queenka brushed her hair back over her shoulder, as if meaning to try and dispel the topic “what’s important is that everything’s cleared up, right?” A chorus of agreement went through everyone. She met my gaze again, some of her earlier distaste gone. It didn’t make things any less uncomfortable. “Sorry, I guess I’m kinda at fault here too.”

“No way Mun Hee-ah. You weren’t even there when it happened.” A girl chided her, taking her side. Queenka minion, there was no doubt about it.

Smiling a little at the comment the queenka held a hand out “I’m Mun Hee.” As if I hadn’t heard her friend say it.    

“My name is Lena,” It felt wrong telling her. She had my name, my face, it was enough to send a team after me if I slipped up around her princes. The conversation dwindled, everyone turned and listening to my words. “it’s nice to meet you.” I brought my hand up to hers, shaking it. It was soft, and rightfully cold.

No sooner had our hands broken apart did I feel a push against my back.

“Can I look through your notes from yesterday? I didn’t get a chance to finish taking them down.” Sehun said, no louder than necessary for the group to hear.

“S-sure,” I choked, my voice pitchy and awkward and embarrassing.

Way to be natural Lena.   

I walked ahead, his hand pressing us forward unseemingly. To anyone else it looked as though we were walking close, maybe even talking intimately. Without him I would still be stuck in front of the doorway.   

Reaching the last row I immediately dropped into my chair, my legs going stiff and twitchy. Sehun slid into the desk next to me, letting his bag rest on the floor. He turned to me, expression almost expectant.

“W-what?”

He held a pencil in one hand, “The notes?” My cheeks raged a deep red. He had actually been serious.

“Just a second.” I ped my bag, laying a binder between us. His eyes scanned the pages as I flipped through them. It felt like an eternity until I reached the right one.

“You have nice writing,” I blushed again at the sudden compliment, fiddling with my pencil case.

“Not really.”

He pulled out a notebook of his own, flipping to a new page. Then turned to me, “It’s the truth.” I didn’t know how in the world to respond to him or his gaze.

It showed in my voice. “Thank you.” For a couple moments it was quiet, his hand gliding across sheet as he wrote. I watched, then fiddled with my things, and repeated. Should I offer to help? He seemed to be doing fine though. Should I be making small talk? Maybe I would, if only there wasn’t so many stares pinned on my back right now.

“Aw sunbae!” We both turned at the whine. Kai had his back turned to us, the hemicircle of people following his steps. I couldn’t help but gulp when I noticed they were tracking to our direction. “We came here to talk to you guys.” The others protested to Kai but he kept moving. I looked back to Sehun, but he had already focused back to the notes.

“Maybe next time,” Kai responded, his voice kind but with its own undertone of persuasion. Though a bit reluctant about half the group shuffled up, chatting as they drifted towards the door.

“We visited this time, so come to our class next okay?” The queenka minion called out, her arm linked with Min Hee’s “Class 2-A!” Right next door to us. The pair disappeared through the door. Then I thought to breathe.

“You alright?” Sehun murmured, casually leafing through my binder. His eyes never left my face.

“Yeah, just a little tired.” It was hard to explain. Just by watching it was obvious these two had a power of their own. It gave the same outcome, but it was achieved by the most different ways. Kai had his open, sometimes borderlining teasing nature. It was disarming and acted like gravity, pulling people around him. Sehun freely chose to be quiet and distant, but that built power in his words and the things he did. There was a charisma in his strong and silent character. It made you want to try even harder to get closer. People could - and most likely would - bend whichever way they’re asked to if by these kingkas. The thought was intimidating, no matter how nice they seemed.

“Studying already?” Kai murmured, coming up to us. There was a teasing gleam in his eyes, one that was hard to miss “We haven’t even started the lesson.”

My reply was a reflex “I was just helping Sehun-sshi.” The said person turned, staring at me pointedly. It took a couple moments until I got the point. “Oh, uh Sehun...-ah.” It sounded just as awkward as I felt, but somehow satisfied them.  

“Alright, to your seats please.” Our teacher walked in, calling us to attention. Sehun stood from his seat, sliding the binder in front of me.

“I kinda overwrote on a few things. Did you get what you needed?”

His eyes seemed to twinkle, the barest of smiles ghosting over his lips “You worry too much.”

“I w-what?”  

“Alright guys, that’s enough.” The teacher walked in, calling the room to order. Sehun slowly slid out of his seat, taking his things into his hands.

“Relax,” He murmured, going to his seat at the back. I faced forward, hoping my expression didn’t show how muddled I actually felt.

I can’t relax Sehun-sshi. Not yet.   

~~~

Ahem *que awkward coughs that aren’t necessary* uh, hi guys~

For the upteenth time I apologise for the slow updates. Though I hope this one will help make up for it, even if it’s by a little bit :) .

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