There’s tension heavy in the evening air. Everyone’s a bit on edge and Luhan’s more than sure it shows in their performance. Luhan can hear the tired annoyed edge to the photographer’s tone, and he can see the pissed off glint in Kyungsoo’s eyes, and he almost feels sorry for Kai and Sehun.

Sehun and Kai are the cause of the tension. They’re fighting, which means there’s a bunch of cold shoulders and glares in between the smiling and poised photographs. The two rarely fight, but when they do, it’s just as bratty and tiresome as two school children fighting. They’re doing individual shots at the moment, Kai has already done his, and Sehun is currently doing his own while Kai glares at him behind the photographer.

Luhan, happy to be away from the two, is settled in a dressing room chair. His neck aches slightly as the makeup artist twists and turns his head in her hands, and a tiny scowl is set on both his and her face.

He hears a chair squeak just as the makeup artist lets go of his head, and he moves pass her to get near Kyungsoo.

“I’ve been thinking,” Kyungsoo starts quietly, the hesitance in his words is as clear as daylight. “Maybe… I want to leave.”

“Take a walk then,” Luhan tells him with a frown. “I’ll stop Kai and Sehun from killing each other if that’s what you’re concerned about. You don’t have to watch us 24/7 Kyungsoo, we’re adults.”

“I didn’t mean take a walk,” Kyungsoo says. “Nor do I want to go on vacation or whatever. I meant, I’ve been thinking about leaving the Capital…for good.”

Luhan reacts before he can think better of it and his lips set into a tight frown as he stares with narrowed eyes at Kyungsoo. “Are you serious? What brought this up?”

“I figured that it’s not too late for me to see the rest of Caelum. So many people say it’s a beautiful country but all I’ve ever seen were the cold buildings of this city. There are more places like Asaea, you know, places built around nature.”

“So Junmyeon put this in your head,” Luhan asks with a frown. He doesn’t need the younger boy to explain, he can already hear the words as if Junmyeon had spoken them. Junmyeon and Kyungsoo were close, Luhan didn’t know the exact depth of their relationship and he didn’t care to find out.

He finds himself turning away from Kyungsoo and crossing his arms over his chest. The frown on his face is as close to a pout he’ll ever get, and even though he feels like a child, it’s in his right to be angry, or so he believes. “You want to be a part of the Junmyeon and Yixing show that badly?”

“Junmyeon did suggest it,” Kyungsoo says, voice as neutral as possible. The bleak emotionless state of Kyungsoo’s voice pisses him off even more.

He shouldn’t be doing that, Luhan can’t help but think. Kyungsoo wasn’t being interrogated by a warlord. He was being talked to by someone who considered him a friend and him and his stupid mask could go to hell for all Luhan cared.

“I don’t have to go with them. I just think it’ll be good to leave. There’s more to life than just living in dying in the Capital.”

Luhan bites on his bottom lip, and Kyungsoo peers at him.

“Lu,” Kyungsoo starts, his voice is softer now, but it’s still blank and leaves Luhan confused as to what the younger boy’s intentions are just from calling his name.

“Okay,” Luhan says with a resigned sigh. “I’ve been doing this since I was fifteen, I’ll self-manage myself, and I’m sure you can find a decent manager for Sehun and Kai. Speaking of Kai, if he really means that little to you then don’t even bother telling him. He doesn’t need to know that his feelings are completely one-sided.”

“I wasn’t planning to leave tonight,” Kyungsoo tells him, as Luhan begins to stand. “It was just a suggestion.”

“Don’t hold yourself back,” Luhan says coldly, his mask isn’t as strong as Kyungsoo’s he can’t hide his emotions completely and as he tries to, for the sake of sounding nonchalant he feels more disgust with himself than anything else. “Think through your options,” he continues softly, reflecting and thinking through his final words. “You’re not destined to die in this city like some of us, and if I were in your shoes I’d flee as fast as I could.”

****

Luhan takes his time removing the excess makeup from his face. He’s the last one to leave, and once he’s done taking the makeup off he’s applying new makeup, simple makeup that covered the imperfections of his face.

He leaves when he’s positive that Kyungsoo isn’t outside waiting for him, and calls for a taxi as he exits the empty building. Luhan sees a tall figure standing against the building a bit far from the entrance. Luhan finds himself approaching the figure, whose eyes are downturned as he plays with his cellphone.

“Hey,” Luhan calls out, making the guy lift his head and turn towards him. Luhan gives a tiny fond grin as he walks hurriedly towards the boy in front of him.

“What are you doing out here,” Luhan asks, he touches Kai’s cheek with the back of his bare hands and frowns then. “You’re cold, Jongin.”

“I’ll survive,” Kai tells him, brushing his hands away. “I waited for you. You’re upset with Kyungsoo-hyung and I’m mad at Sehun.”

“So you want to hang out tonight,” Luhan asks.

“We haven’t done that before,” Kai states.

“Because you and Sehun are like babies to me,” Luhan tells him, reaching up to affectionately ruffle Kai’s hair.

“It’s only been three years,” Kai mutters, moving out of Luhan’s reach as he heads towards the yellow taxi now waiting for them.

“Three years is close to a lifetime when you’re in the modeling business,” Luhan tells him. He pauses as he walks in looks up towards the sky, nose wrinkling just slightly. “It’s going to rain,” he mutters. Kai looks up then, eyes trained to the sky as if he’s looking for a sign himself.

“I can’t tell,” he mutters.

“You’re old enough to go out right,” Luhan asks, as he gets inside the vehicle.

“I’m legal,” Kai responds, as Luhan says the name of a club in District Three to the driver. “Hyung, why are you upset with Kyungsoo-hyung?”

“I can’t tell you,” Luhan says. “It’ll break your heart, and I’d rather not get in the middle of it.” He wrinkles his nose once more. “I don’t like getting in between love problems, they’re the messiest.”

“Will Kyungsoo-hyung treat me like how you treat Sehun,” Kai asks. “He hasn’t yet, so I figured that maybe there was a chance.”

“How do I treat Sehun,” Luhan asks with a frown, ignoring the question directed at him while throwing an inquisitive glance towards Kai.

“Like a child,” Kai answers. “Like his feelings aren’t real. You completely shut him down at nearly any chance you can get.”

“He is a child to me,” Luhan tells him. “You both are. You’re like younger brothers and I don’t want you to be hurt.”

“You don’t have to worry about Sehun anymore,” Kai says, his fingers lift to touch at the glass of the taxi’s cab window. It has started to rain, Kai’s tapping against the window like a distracted child and Luhan leans back farther in his seat. “He’s seeing someone. He won’t admit it but he came home at dawn smelling like cheap ladies' perfume.”

Luhan thinks over his words, and nods his head. “I can see why you’re upset. Your relationship with each other is closer than anything I’ve ever seen.”

“Apparently it’s not as close as it seems,” Kai mutters. The cab slows down, and Luhan grabs his card out of his pocket and hands it to the driver. “You won’t abandon me in there will you?”

“No,” Luhan says, eyes glancing towards the club. “It’s not war though Jongin. You’re a decent dancer, and you’re good-looking. You’ll probably end up abandoning me.”

No one abandons anyone. Luhan does stumble into his apartment with a highly intoxicated Kai close to dawn. Luhan helps Kai fumble his way out of his drenched clothing and then allows the boy to fall into the fluffy sheets of the bed, damp hair wetting one of his pillows.

“I’m such a good person,” Luhan mutters drily. His phone starts to ring and Luhan fishes it out of his pants pocket, muttering a sleepy, hello, without checking to see who’s calling.

“Hello,” the deep tired voice of Oh Sehun says. “Luhan have you seen Jongin? I’ve been calling him for hours and he hasn’t picked up. He said…”

“He’s here with me,” Luhan says interrupting Sehun, fingers reaching up to massage the bridge of his nose.

“Where is here,” Sehun asks with a soft groan. “Will he be back anytime soon?”

“He’s at my apartment Sehun,” Luhan tells him, “and he’ll probably be back as soon as he wakes up, it mostly depends on how much of a hangover he has.” There’s a chilling silence on Sehun’s end and Luhan waits with an annoyed frown for the younger to say something in regards to Luhan’s words, he’s more than sure Sehun’s mind is playing scenario after scenario of what could have transpired between Luhan and Kai.

“Okay,” Sehun says voice cold, and ends the call before Luhan can say anything more. Luhan doesn’t even bother to be upset with Sehun’s reaction. He stands and changes into sweats and a t-shirt before settling on his bed beside Kai, makeup still on.

****

Luhan wakes at the first rays of sunlight warming his face. Arms are thrown around his waist and hair tickles his neck as he struggles with consciousness. It takes him a second to fix his disoriented sleep-clouded memories but when he does he pushes harshly at Kai.

“Jongin, go home,” Luhan huffs out. The boy holding onto him groans softly, and Luhan escapes from his grasp. “Sehun called last night.”

Jongin sits up then, hair disarrayed and sticking up at all ends and honey brown eyes bleary as he rubs at them with the heels of his hand. “What did he say,” he groans out, voice deeper than usual.

“He asked where you were, then possibly assumed the worse when I told him you were with me,” Luhan says. “I’m going to make coffee do you want some?”

“No thanks,” Jongin says. “I’ll just get dressed and leave.”

When Kai’s dressed, he meets Luhan in the kitchen and Luhan forces the younger to sit and eat something before he goes. They’re sitting in silence, Luhan drinking coffee and Kai eating breakfast when Luhan’s main doorbell chimes. He frowns at the sound, and Kai turns to him in confusion.

“You have a doorbell hyung,” Kai asks and Luhan eyes him with mild amusement at the sincerely confused question.

“Yeah,” he says moving over to the panel in the kitchen to check to see who’s ringing his bell. “Kyungsoo normally lets you into the building so you don’t have to use it.” On the fuzzy screen of the panel appears Kim Junmyeon, and Zhang Yixing peering wonderingly into the camera. “What do you want,” Luhan asks, disdain taking over his voice as he speaks into the intercom.

“Let us up,” Junmyeon commands.

“I can’t I have a visitor,” Luhan retorts. “Go away.” Junmyeon’s lips pull into an obvious frown and Luhan raises an eyebrow as if the younger male can see it.

“Come on Lu,” Yixing says taking over, voice soothingly gentle. “Let us in. Junmyeon and I both need to talk to you about what happened with Kyungsoo.”

“Fine,” Luhan huffs, he presses a red button to allow them in and turns swiftly towards Kai. “Looks like you get to meet the people that caused my fight with Kyungsoo.”

“The fight that will break my heart,” Jongin asks.

“Yeah,” Luhan says picking up his lukewarm coffee off the kitchen counter and chugging it down in huge gulps. “They’re the ones that want to take your Kyungsoo-hyung away.” He turns and gets more coffee as the sound of his apartment creaks open.

“Luhan,” Yixing calls out, but Luhan doesn’t bother to answer him. They enter the kitchen as Luhan settles down beside Kai. “Kai, meet Zhang Yixing, and Kim Junmyeon, they work for National Security.”

Kai smiles in a friendly manner towards the two boys before turning towards Luhan. “I should probably go. Thanks for letting me spend the night.”

“Did you sleep with him,” Junmyeon asks as soon as Kai’s out of the room. “I really hope you didn’t sleep with him to spite Kyungsoo.”

“Why does it matter it’s not like Kyungsoo cares.”

“Luhan don’t take your anger out on Kyungsoo,” Junmyeon tells him. “It’s my fault. He asked about the travels and he seemed really interested in. I told him he should come with us for a bit just to see how it is. He didn’t want to and I honestly didn’t think he’d change his mind.”

Luhan frowns slightly, eyes running along his smooth polished wooden table as he gathers his thoughts while taking slow deep breaths.

“Okay,” he says a moment later, voice mirroring Sehun’s from the phone. “I told him before didn’t I, that he could leave if he wants to? Do I just seem that petty or am I just untrustworthy?”

Yixing like always is the first to react. He moves forward and places a hand on Luhan’s shoulder while sitting down beside him. “It’s not that,” he tells Luhan fingers rubbing soothing circles into Luhan’s shoulders. “We just don’t want you to hate us, Luhan. We’re childhood friends; we shouldn’t let something as small as this get in between us. We love you.”

Luhan grins despite himself, and leans into Yixing. “I love you too,” he states.

The pair stay past their welcome,  but Luhan never kicks them out, he has no desire to be alone and Yixing and Junmyeon were both entertaining in their own way.

“Why do you read books like these,” Junmyeon asks picking up a brown hardcover book with yellowing pages. The binding barely glued together and the edges of the book pages were folded and dog-eared. It’s a psychology book, in anthropology on various mental disorders. “You know they only exist to make you feel grateful that you were born a Perfect.”

“I know,” Luhan says taking the book out of Junmyeon’s hands. “They’re just nice to read.”

“They’re blatant propaganda,” Junmyeon tells him. “I’m surprised that you of all people would have books like these.”

“We all have the things we choose to hang onto,” Luhan states defensively. He heads to his bedroom and places the book on the end table. He huffs slightly and runs his hands through his hair smoothing it down a bit. He hasn’t taken a shower since the day before and just the thought of the layer of grime sticking to his skin makes his frown deepen as a feeling of open disgust runs through his body.

Yixing peeks his head into the room, eyes looking around cautiously before finally meeting Luhan’s. “Junmyeon just left,” the younger male tells him. “He went…to…do something,” Yixing continues. “He didn’t tell me.”

“I don’t understand your relationship,” Luhan says, throwing the younger male a pitying glance.

“Neither do I,” Yixing retorts, a small laugh bubbling in his throat. “You know we really didn’t come back just to kidnap Kyungsoo right?”

“I know,” Luhan says. He pauses again, the feelings he does his best to suppress begins to bubble up once more. He bites his lip in thought, before he’s reminded that he’s talking to Yixing, and Yixing is understanding. He’s perfect, but he understands. “If he leaves. I’ll only have Kris, and Kris is getting married soon.”

“You’ve always hated being alone,” Yixing muses. “You could come with us.”

“I can’t,” Luhan says. “President Kim wouldn’t allow it and… you know how they treat people like me.”

“But you won’t be alone,” Yixing says. “You’ll be with the CNS, that’s worth something.”

“The last of the few First Gen Perfects a part of the CNS was killed three years ago,” Luhan says. “People would think I’m even more of a criminal if I traveled with you.”

Yixing frowns, but he doesn’t speak up again about the topic, he’s not stupid and he knows Luhan’s right so instead he sighs and pulls Luhan with him to the older boy’s bed. “I have something more interesting to talk about.”

“Like what,” Luhan asks, lifting his eyebrows slightly as he makes himself comfortable on his bed, accidentally kicking Yixing’s side in the process.

 “Junmyeon says your kind president forced you to live alone.”

“He’s not fond of the traffic that tended to circle around my apartment,” Luhan says.

“You always did throw the best parties,” Yixing replies. He sits on Luhan’s bed and turns to face the older male directly. “Kris told me you’re interested in President Kim’s new secretary though. Are you interested just to get back at President Kim, or are you really interested in him?”

“If I was interested in him to get back at President Kim, I would have done everything I could just to have the most risqué pictures land on his desk.”

“So you’re just interested in him,” Yixing asks, he leans in close to Luhan, fingers underneath his chin and eyes wide in wonder. He looks like an eager child and Luhan can’t help but to grin indulgently at the boy. “Kris says that he’s not even your type, yet you’re still interested in him.”

“You know I don’t stick strictly to a type,” Luhan says. “Also I don’t even know how Kris would know that. He hasn’t met him.”

“Yeah,” Yixing nods, “but when you’re really interested in a person. I mean like seriously interested in a person, that person looks just like the rest of the people you’ve been seriously involved with. Are you really interested in him?”

“If really interested means I want to do more than just sleep with him than I guess you can say that. He’s a pretty interesting person. I think he’s a First Gen.”

“First Gen,” Yixing repeats, furrowing his eyebrows together as he thinks, “I never would have imagined I’d see the day when you of all people would be interested in a First Gen. Will you pursue it?”

“I don’t really have the time to,” Luhan says. “Nor do I really want to, First Gens are all kind of broken creatures.”

“But you will won’t you,” Yixing says.

“I’ll see where it goes from here,” Luhan replies. “I never knew Kris liked to gossip.”

“Kris likes knowing things more than telling things but it’s easy to get underneath his skin to get him to confess all there is to know.”

I didn't reread it like how I normally do so it might have a bit more errors than usually. Thank you for the upvotes and subs so far, if you check on your left side underneath the thing that says Fanfic feed there's a blog post, please check it out if you haven't it will properly explain why my update seemed to have taken a long time.