I leaned against the wooden doorframe and peered out of the thick panel of glass. Hyerin had offered to give me a ride to Music Core tonight, and she would be here at any minute now to pick me up.

                I pressed my forehead against the cool glass and closed my eyes. I had been thinking about what Min Neul had said to me. Idol-boyfriend or not, you still deserve to be treated right by him. Don’t settle for less than what you deserve. Okay, so Byunghun hadn’t done anything that wrong. Canceling our date against his will was definitely not an excuse to be mad or disappointed. That was just a one-time thing, and I really needed to stop making such a big deal about it. I let out a deep breath and rolled my shoulders back. Time to get over whatever stupid grudge I was holding and replaced whatever disappointment I was harboring with excitement. Teen Top was performing their remix version of “Supa Luv” on Music Core tonight, and two of my best friends and I were going to see it. I never got to see L.Joe perform as much as I always wanted to, so tonight was going to be a good night to matter what. No furtive bitterness or nagging disappointment was allowed in the back of my mind tonight; the only thing I should worry about was finding the self control not to not faint when L.Joe spoke his y, breathy English.

                My eyes remained shut until L.Joe’s voice caused them to pop open. Startled, I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone. Byunghun’s name appeared on the screen, and with one click of a button, he was magically waiting on the other end.

                “Hi,” I said sweetly, smiling.

                “Hey beautiful, are you still coming to the show tonight?”

                I rolled my eyes, still smiling. “Of course. With Min Neul and Hyerin.”

                “Well I’ll be sure to tell Changjo and C.A.P,” Byunghun chuckled. “They’ll be excited, but not as excited as me. You know why?”

                “Why?”

                “Because I’m coming out to see you after the show. Okay?”

                My jaw hung open. “But…how? What do you mean?”

                “After the show I’ll come find you before you leave. We can just hang out for a while. I promise.”

                Another promise. I felt that disappointment fight its way back into my brain. “Byunghun, are you sure you can?”

                “Positive! I promise I’ll come out. With Changjo and C.A.P too! Wait outside after everyone leaves and we’ll come find you, okay?”

                I let out a sigh and closed my eyes again. When I opened my eyes, I opened my mouth. “Okay.”

                “Yes! That’s what I wanted to hear! Babe, I can’t wait to see you. I’ve got to go now. Wish me luck!”

                But I couldn’t wish him luck; he hung up too quickly.

                At that moment, Hyerin’s mom’s car came rolling into the driveway. I called over my shoulder that I was leaving, and after hearing my mom shout a response back, I pushed open for door and strolled out.

                About an hour later, Hyerin, Min Neul, and I were dancing to Kan Mi Youn’s “Paparazzi” among a crowd of screaming fans. She ended the song strongly, standing in the middle of six dancers dressed in all black, panting and smiling. When the lights dimmed and the screaming started to die down, she paraded off stage with her dancers. The color of the lights suddenly changed from red to purple. Instead of the word “Paparazzi” scrolling like a marquee across the screen behind the stage, sleek neon blue letters spelling the words TEEN TOP appeared. Hyerin, Min Neul and I felt our hearts stop, and we all took in deep breaths before we let out the screams so high-pitched we thought we’d busted our vocal chords. Through the flashing lights we could see six figures emerge from the sidelines and take center stage, standing in their usually V-shaped formation, their hands balled into fists at their sides and their heads bent down. Andromedas were going wild. After a few more seconds of screaming in anticipation, the opening beats of the “Supa Luv” remix filled the stage. Their heads shot up in unison as Niel began the song as he always did. They executed the choreography in unison as they always did. Andromedas were screaming their lungs out, just as they always did.

                I had my eyes glued to L.Joe the entire time. His pink hair was always extra straight and shiny and he always looked great in the usual tight pants and jacket he wore. He always looked amazing on stage. I especially loved when he smirked in the middle of the choreography. It made all L.Jjangs go wild.

                It was so hard to believe that that pink-haired boy on stage was actually my boyfriend. I knew him personally--I knew all of them personally. It was just so hard to wrap my brain around the fact that sweet little Byunghun was the same person as y smirking L.Joe.

                Maybe I’m biased, but, I thought he looked the best on stage. I thought he looked the best in the leathery black and leopard-print outfit. I always thought he did the shoulder-dance the best, too. I felt like such a fan, standing there screaming and drooling over how good he looked.

                In fact, there was a girl standing next to me who was exactly equal to me. No, not just in height; she was a fangirling over L.Joe. She had long, dark hair, big round eyes, and pouty lips. She was dressed in something I would totally wear as well; dark jeans, black Uggs, a black v-neck t-shirt and a purple scarf wrapped loosely around her neck. She was clutching a picture of L.Joe mounted on a popsicle stick, waving it frantically in the air. I had no idea who she was, but she was an L.Jjang. A much prettier L.Jjang than me, I must say. Why had L.Joe not fallen for her? Why did he fall for me instead? What made me so special? If my uncle wasn’t Andy, would my path and Byunghun’s path have crossed at all?

                Probably not, I decided. Perhaps I would know Teen Top, for my friends were Andromedas and it would only be a matter of time before I became one too. Perhaps the L.Jjang beside me and I would have traded lives. I’d be lying in bed awake every night daydreaming about L.Joe and she’d be holding hands with him. Who knew?

                I shook my head clear of thoughts as the second stanza of “Supa Luv” came around. I needed to spend less time playing What If in my head and more time focusing on what was happened now; which was Ricky’s Matrix Move. The crowd went wild, especially the Lovelies. Hyerin, Min Neul and I bounced up and down on our toes and screamed. Ricky executed the move perfectly, as he always did.

                The remix version of Supa Luv featured a little bit of a change in choreography. Chunji stood in the middle and wowed the crowd with his long note, as usual, but one by one the members each jump up at different times. I always watched L.Joe, for he was the last one to jump. Chunji’s note was a little longer in the remix, which gave all the Chunsas a few extra seconds of heaven. After his note ended, C.A.P’s rap came around. I always liked the funky music that played in the background of his rap. I also loved how he pretended to smash his dongsaengs with his fist one by one, L.Joe being the first. I think C.A.P may have seen us in the crowd because I caught him smiling in our direction.

                The choreography changes after the rap yet again. The boys do the “record-dance” in slow motion. I always thought the choreography looked good like that, and it matched the new beat of the song perfectly. Plus, if you’re an L.Jjang who watched L.Joe on stage like a hawk, you could almost always catch him smirking at this part. Maybe he smirks subconsciously. Maybe he does it on purpose. Whatever the reason, it sure made L.Jjangs go wild. This part in the choreography was an indication that the song was unfortunately coming to an end. Fortunately for all L.Jjangs, this was the moment they have all been waiting for. They watch it week after week, but still can’t get enough of it. It’s become a routine.

                The L.Jjangs in the crowd hold their breath as Teen Top’s pink-haired rapper finally gets his time to shine. “Yeah,” he breaths into the microphone. He drops it from his lips as he saunters up to the center of the stage, but picks it back up and holds it in with signature grip, one finger stuck out under his noise. “See what I’m tryna say baby, is your luv,” he seductively points to the crowd, his head to the side, “pus my luv,” he makes a fist and pounds his chest with it, “supa luv,” he and the other five members do a quick lip-wipe. All members turn their back to the crowd except L.Joe. “You know you want it,” he steps back slowly, letting the crowd soak up the last few seconds of his y English. “How that sound?” he wiggles his fingers a little beside his ear, as if the words he was speaking were like liquid gold pouring into every mesmerized Andromeda’s ears. He lets out a chuckle before he brings his fingerless-gloved hand to his lips and seduces Andromedas with his lip wipe. He squints his eyes until they match the shape of rainbows and flings his hand in the crowd’s direction, enticing every Andromeda to reach out and grab his hand. He slowly turns his back to his reeling audience and leads Teen Top in a sharp double-snap-move before the six of them roll their heads back and throw their beyond-enthralled audience one final glance over their shoulders. Cue the screaming girls.

                And that boy was my boyfriend.

                Teen Top was one of the last performances. After them was G.NA, and then the show was over. I swear the crowd shouted the loudest for Teen Top, but maybe that was just because Hyerin, Min Neul and I were in the audience.

When they show had ended, the three of us grabbed hands and pulled through the crowd on our way to the double doors. I think my heart was still pounding obnoxiously in my chest by the time we were outside. We veered to the right and stood beside the doors, letting the crowd rush past us. I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone to shoot L.Joe a text message.

                The sky overhead was much darker by the time the last few lingering fans had left. A few nail-biting minutes later, a petite figure in a gray hooded sweatshirt appeared at the double doors. He threw his body against one of them, pushing it open. A huge smile spread across my face as the figure stuck his head out, a sliver of pink peeking out from under the hood. I filled with excitement like a balloon.

                “Babe, I’m sorry, I can’t really come out and see you,” the figure said.

                I felt myself deflate. Hyerin and Min Neul stood behind me and exchanged worried looks.

                “What?” I spat out desperately.

                L.Joe lifted his head up to look into my eyes. He was still done-up from his performance, but he was trying to mask his handsome face and noticeable hair with his floppy hood. “I can’t come out and see you. I have to go right back inside. You can’t come with me, either.” He bit his lip. “I’m sorry. Those are the rules.”

                I in air and nodded slowly, trying to steady my voice. “Yeah, that’s okay, I, um, totally understand.”

                “Okay, I know I’ve broken two promises already, but I swear this is the last time.” His expression changed from L.Joe to Byunghun. “Tomorrow. Two o-clock. Movie theater. We’ll go see a movie. I’ll pay for the tickets, candy, popcorn, everything. Just you and me. And I promise,” Byunghun stated, “No more disappointments.” He smiled his charming thousand-watt smile for emphasis.

                I wish I saw the truth the truth behind it.