A/N: you are all in for some treat. this chapter is over 7000 words. *cracks knuckles* prepare for a crap ton of songs as well. enjoy! 

CHAPTER TWENTY

song1: the 1975- chocolate

I sat down quietly on the couch after fetching a cup of tea for Hyejin. She bit her lips as I stayed silent. Our gaze avoided each other for the longest time, both thinking of what to say to the other. Finally, Hyejin decided to speak up first to cut the solemn atmosphere.

“Yunju-ah… I’m sorry I didn’t let you know I was coming. And I thought it’s best if Taehyun knows where you are right now. He looked really worried… Not just him but WINNER and the rest of the company too. Everyone’s been talking about you.” Hyejin began her monologue hesitantly. I listened wordlessly. “I know you have your reasons for what you did. At first I was confused but your mom explained to me over the phone.” She reached over and held onto my hand tightly. “I can’t believe you had to go through all that trouble alone. Why didn’t you tell me?”

I chuckled tiredly, “If I told you then you will be the first one to object me coming back.”

“Well, that’s true.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to keep it a secret from you. Please don’t tell Taehyun why I’m here.” I pleaded.

“Why not?” Hyejin asked with a worrisome expression. “He should be the one who deserves to know the truth!”

I sighed. “But I can’t bring myself to tell him about Jihyun…” Hyejin simply looked at me with pursed lips. “Plus… They’re going to debut soon. I really don’t want to intrude on them. I mean… You and I both know it’s a bad idea for him to be in a relationship right now.”

Hyejin leaned back on the couch. “But that’s so unfair for you.”

I shook my head. “it’s okay. I mean… I’m just going to pick up my life here. I think it’s good to have a fresh start.” I tried to smile reassuringly at my friend. “So please… Don’t tell Taehyun about my intentions. It’s easiest for the both of us if he continues hating me.”

Hyejin pouted and leaned in to give me a heartwarming hug. My body relaxed along with her touch and I found myself releasing all the negative vibes away. “Well, what you did definitely left a strong impression on him. He looks so out of it these days.” I frowned. The least I want is for him to be sad. I know he deserved none of this but it’s for the best. We had a good short time spent together and that was enough, right? “What are you planning on doing now?”

I shrugged. “I’ll probably be helping out at my mom’s restaurant for now until I find a job.”

Hyejin nodded understandingly. “If you need anything, be sure to call me, arrasseo?”

I smiled. “Just don’t be sick of me calling you all the time!”

We shared a laugh. I don’t think I have genuinely laughed so wholeheartedly in a long while. It was a nice day spent with Hyejin as I haven’t had the chance to really take my mind off things for some time now. Most important of all, it was good for me to not worry about all the troubles back in Seoul. I took Hyejin back to the train station that evening and waved her goodbye as her train began to leave. I sighed. It’s not so bad to start a new life right? Maybe this is a good thing.

---

A few months have passed and before I knew it, the end of summer is already approaching. I’m currently working as a makeup artist for a popular and trendy magazine. It is a great job as it’s of a field that I enjoy doing and it’s great to do makeup for models and working with new photographers. However, this doesn’t mean I don’t miss my old job in Seoul. Hyejin and I still keep in touch once in a while and she has actually came to visit me a few times when she has a few day offs in a row.

As for Taehyun and I, we haven’t contacted each other at all. It’s a good thing though, as I always reasoned with myself. Although I miss him dearly and still like him as much as before, it’s great to know that he is doing well with WINNER. They have just debuted and have received a lot of love and support from fans not just locally but internationally as well. I am just happy for him since he is able to chase his dreams and debut with the rest of his buddies. So it probably means that I have made the right choice to leave him. Just that thought always brings a smile to my face. It’s also nice to be able to watch him perform even if it’s just on television. Somehow, I still feel like I am connected to him. Heck, it may sound stalker-ish but I admit that I kept the selca he took for me on the phone and sometimes I will just stare at his picture when I miss him a little too much. But who am I kidding? Wishful thinking that is.

On the other hand, I also talk to Sungbae regularly as he has been composing songs for a few artists now. Even though it isn’t something that he wants initially- to be a rapper, he has taken a new found love for his current works of composing.  He says he finds it extremely interesting and has a sense of belonging in composition. I am honestly happy for him. I cannot believe just a little bit of help and connection can get him somewhere so far and interests him so much. I felt like I did a very good deed that day. Who knows what will happen then if we didn’t chat on the train?

He also told me that he got back together with his ex- girlfriend. Sungbae says she has changed a lot and became more understanding than before. He doesn’t know what happened with her but he said that they are even closer now than ever. I grinned at the good news. It feels great to know how well he is doing with his life. Sometimes, finding a hobby or something that interests you so much just simply brings you so much joy in life.

At the end of our conversation, he says that his girlfriend and he will be visiting Busan in a few days and that he wants to meet up so he can treat me to a meal since I helped him out during his lowest point in life. Of course, I wouldn’t mind some company and free food so I immediately agreed.

And now, here I am rushing to get to the restaurant since I got off work later than usual. I glanced at my watch and cursed as I ran down another block. It was when the restaurant came into view when I slowed down my pace and tried to fix my hair a little before entering. My eyes searched around the space and it was then when I caught Sungbae smiling and waving at me at a corner of the restaurant. I instantly returned the same bright grin and quickly walked over to his table. I noticed his girlfriend sitting in front of him with her back facing me. I immediately made a speech in my mind for introduction.

song2 clazziquai- still im by your side

“Annyeong Sungbae-shi!!” I greeted but he took me by surprise by standing up and giving me a hug.

“Annyeong my friend! I haven’t seen you in so long!!! You look great!” Sungbae flashed me that dorky smile of his. “Oh oh! Before anything, I need to introduce you to my girlfriend!”

I glanced down to see her standing up and turning around to greet me. Once I met her gaze, my smile left my face. A chill swept down my spine and her face looked just as pale as mine. “Yunju-shi, this is Jihyun.”

I was speechless and I didn’t know how to react. I cannot believe that the woman who made my life so miserable is standing before me and turns out to be Sungbae’s girlfriend. However, I tried to hide my inner turmoil with a smile and slowly lifted my hand up for a handshake as she returned the same shocked gesture. “H-hi Yunju-shi.”

Taken aback by her words, I decided to simply go with the flow as well. “…Nice to meet you Jihyun-shi.” I slowly sat down on the table as the other two followed suit. Somehow, dinner and catching up doesn’t sound as fun as I thought anymore. We quickly placed our orders with the waitress. I stayed quiet the entire time, unsure of what to say now that I know Jihyun is Sungbae’s girlfriend. Small world…

“Jihyun-ah, remember when I told you I met her on the train to Busan when we broke up months ago?” Jihyun didn’t reply but just slowly nodded at his words. “It’s all thanks to her that I am able to start composing.” He turned towards me. “I owe you so much Yunju-shi.”

I tried to smile at him. “Don’t sweat it. I know I got to help you after listening to that track you made.”

“Haha. I must have looked so miserable that day… Speaking of which, how are you doing?” Upon those words, Jihyun suddenly stopped staring at her empty plate and lifted her head up to look at what I was going to reply.

“Oh, everything’s well. I’m working for magazine editorial shoots now as a makeup artist.” I explained truthfully.

“That’s good! It’s nice to see that you’re doing fine now!” Sungbae turned his head to Jihyun. “You know what? The first time I met her, she was just crying on the train for the whole ride! It’s weird to see her smile now.” Jihyun looked lost and simply bit her lips. I swallowed the knot in my throat. Man… This is going to be the most awkward dinner in my entire life.

“Oh yeah… Speaking of that… Did you and that guy really break up then?” Sungbae asked curiously.

I gulped but managed to look at him to reply, “Oh uh… Well yes we did.”

“Oh… I’m sorry. It’s okay, there are so many guys out there. You’re such an awesome girl, I’m sure you’ll find someone for you!” Sungbae encouraged with a pat on my back. Jihyun simply had a very guilty look on her face.

“Things… happen for a reason I guess.” I somehow managed to connect words within my mind to form a sentence. I was simply speechless and I was extremely curious as to what Jihyun is thinking of right now.

The next thing we knew, Jihyun accidentally spilled water on herself while she was pouring down the liquid a little too fast into her glass.

“Are you alright?” Sungbae asked immediately as he got up from his chair and began dabbing her shirt and jeans with a napkin.

“I’m fine.” Jihyun quickly said. “I think I’ll just go clean it up at the washroom.” She then hesitantly turned towards me and asked, “Um… Yunju-shi, do you mind helping me out?”

I stared at her, taken aback by her request. Sungbae swiftly glanced at me and waited for me to answer. I frantically looked at the two in front of me before mumbling, “Oh, sure.”

“Thanks Yunju-shi.” Sungbae answered and remained in his seat, waving at a waitress to clean up the mess on the table.

I got out of my seat and followed Jihyun into the washroom. Once we were both inside, Jihyun immediately checked the stalls to see if they were occupied. After checking that no one was inside the room except for the two of us, she exhaled a sigh and turned towards me. “Yunju-shi… I—“

“Small world huh? I never would have thought that you’re Sungbae’s girlfriend.” I said. “What do you want from me this time now that we are alone in here? Tell me now and stop playing anymore games.”

Jihyun was silent but she spoke up again after a moment. “Yunju-shi, I… I just want to apologize to you. For what I’ve done to you and… Taehyun—“

“Cut it!” I yelled frustratedly. I can’t believe she is still trying to mock me. What is she trying to do now? Trying to get on my good side because I helped her boyfriend?

“No! Please! Listen to me!” Jihyun begged, her face showed guilt and she looked desperate. She… She looks different. Where’s that cynical and villainous gaze that she used to flash me? In the end, I caved in and decided to listen to her. “I was wrong… I—I’m very sorry for what I did to you. I know what I did wasn’t right and it was very unfair for the both of you… I… I know you may not even forgive me but I really wanted to tell you this.”

I stayed silent, staring down at the washroom floor that is occupied with some tissue paper lying lifelessly. I sighed. “Enough. Nothing is going to change. I don’t want to listen to you anymore.”

“I know… And I’m sorry. But I have explained to Taehyun about it before I left Seoul.”

My blood stopped flowing. “You did what?”

Jihyun sighed. “I know I needed to tell him the truth… So I asked Seungyoon if I can meet up with them and I… I told them what I did. Everything. About what I did to you and him.”

“What?” I immediately faced the sink and leaned my hands over the counter. “Why did you tell him…”

“I thought it’s only fair to let him know.” Jihyun replied slowly. “I just wanted to help you two out… That maybe you guys can resolve the misunderstanding that I created. I know Taehyun still likes you.”

I stopped thinking after she said that. He… He still likes me? That’s impossible. He most likely hates me now and has already forgotten about me. “Stop it please. I don’t want to listen to you anymore.”

“It’s true. In the beginning, I just wanted to tease you… And after you left, I thought he will finally look at me. But he didn’t, so you win okay! Heck, I don’t even know why I did that. I never even liked him in the first place!” Jihyun suddenly confessed. “I… I was stupid back then. I really liked Sungbae but we broke up and I somehow just wanted to cling onto someone.” She looked at me. “I didn’t mean to hurt you… and I really hate myself for it.”

I gulped and tried to swallow my tears. I leaned against the wall, covering my face with my hands in disbelief.

“Jihyun. I don’t know what I should feel about you anymore. Should I hate you or should I be pleased for what you did for me?”

“I know he still likes you… Just please don’t give up on him.” Jihyun stood in front of me. “Now that I’m back with Sungbae… I know what you’re going through without Taehyun by your side.”

“It’s not that easy. He just debuted. I can’t stumble back into his life again…” I finally spoke my mind genuinely.

Jihyun shook her head. “That’s for you to decide. I can’t step another foot into your relationship anymore but I hope you can do something that makes you happy.” I looked up at her and she finally nodded her head at me for encouragement and left me standing alone.

I stayed still, letting her words sink into my mind clearly. Is she telling the truth? Does Taehyun still actually like me? I became extremely confused but my legs suddenly walked out of the washroom on its own. I wasn’t controlling my body anymore and just let me mind move. I walked past Sungbae and Jihyun’s table to which I hear him asking “where are you going??” and Jihyun saying something along the lines of, “Just let her leave. We can move dinner to another time.”

song3 winner- empty

I walked aimlessly on the street, unsure of where to go. I can’t possibly go find Taehyun right now. But if Jihyun really did explain to him what happened… Then it’s best if I clear things out with him once and for all. I know I can’t expect much in the end but it is best if there is no more misunderstanding between us. Maybe we can remain friends after all. I didn’t know why but I ended up dialling Hyejin’s number and began rushing home.

“Yunju-ah! Omo, I was just about to call you!”

“Oh? What’s up unnie?”

“You totally forgot didn’t you? It’s my birthday tomorrow! Aren’t you going to at least say happy birthday to your unnie, huh?”

I chuckled. “No, I didn’t forget.”

“Then are you coming back to celebrate with me or not? Just a reminder, dinner is tomorrow!” She asked again.

“Yes. In fact, I’m going to get a train ticket now. You wouldn’t mind me crashing at your place right?”

“Whoa! Oh of course not, you are more than welcomed! I just… Expected a lot more persuading to do.”

“There’s a lot to tell you when I’m back but I’ll explain everything when I see you.”

I finally reached home and began packing my clothes into my suitcase. My brother came in my room to bug me again. “Oh? Sis you’re leaving again?”

“Just for a few days. It won’t be long.”

By this time, my mom has already come into my room as well. “I didn’t hear you say you’re leaving! Where are you going?”

I stood up after shoving most of my necessities into the luggage and walked past my mother. “I need to go back to Seoul.” I stopped and looked her in the eye. “There’s… Something I need to take care of.”

She hesitated for a while but nodded. “Go. I know it’s important to you. Go before you regret it!” She practically began shoving me out my door. “Yunsook-ah, go with your sister and send her off at the train station.”

“No, it’s okay.” I reassured the two. “I got to go now. I really don’t know if it’s a good idea but I don’t want to regret not going.”

My brother stood at the doorway, looking extremely clueless. “What’s going on…?”

“Take care of eomma when I’m not home, arrasseo!” I smacked his shoulder and smiled at the two. They waved me off and I quickly took off as my cab came in sight.

---

When the train was nearing Seoul, it was already early in the morning and I managed to catch the sunrise. Watching the sun rays hitting the horizon naturally brought a smile onto my face. Maybe, there really could be a fresh start to everything right? Unknowingly, the train had finally pulled to a stop and passengers began piling out. Although I wasn’t able to sleep on the train, I wasn’t sleepy or tired. Hopping off the train, I dragged my luggage with me into the train station.

Now what?

Suddenly, I wasn’t so keen on having a talk with Taehyun anymore. I stared quietly at the people on the platform, minding their own business and hurrying with the rest of their day. But here I am, standing in the middle of a train station, lost in thoughts. I gulped. Maybe I didn’t think this through properly. Was this the right choice? Gathering my inner thoughts, I remembered that I came here for a reason- which is to clear things up with a certain someone who has been occupying my thoughts since forever. I better get to it before I regret coming here.

I quickly caught a taxi and headed straight to Hyejin’s place. Once I arrived, I noticed a van just outside the lobby area. Well, this sure looks very familiar… For a second I totally forgot Hyejin lives in the same apartment as Big Bang.

“Yunju-shi?”

I whipped my head around and saw Jiyong and Seunghyun standing at the entrance, just about to hop onto the van.

I immediately bowed at them, still unable to stop my habit from when I used to work with them. “Good morning!”

“Whoa!! It really is you!” They literally stopped what they’re doing and headed towards me. “You’re back in Seoul? I heard you were in Busan!”

“Are you coming back for good?” Seunghyun beamed at me. “Are you missing your boy toy too much?”

“Excuse me? I’m just here for Hyejin’s birthday.” I quickly replied, giving a glare to the taller men.

Jiyong frowned. “Oh. Well, maybe you will change your mind!” He gave me a wink suddenly, as if hinting something with it. I cocked up an eyebrow. 

I stood still as their van left, watching it slowly drive away. I sighed at their behaviour. I guess some people just never change. I made my way to Hyejin’s apartment and she opened the door in no time after I rang the doorbell. “Yunju-ah!!!!” She leeched onto me. I laughed and returned the same gesture.

“Um, happy birthday?” I managed to squeak out from her death hug.

“If it means you’re moving back then I hope it’s my birthday every day!” She grins and brought my luggage into the living room. “Okay, before anything, PLEASE UPDATE ME WITH WHY YOU’RE ACTUALLY HERE!”

“I saw Jihyun in Busan...” I trailed off, checking Hyejin’s expression. “And we had a talk.”

Her eyes bulged out. “You saw Jihyun? No way!! I can’t believe she had the guts to talk to you!”

“She also apologized for everything she did and she also said she told Taehyun the truth.”

Hyejin didn’t respond and simply stared at me. “She did? She actually has a heart?” I chuckled at her response. “Then… Are you here to… You know… Reconcile with him?”

I shook my head. “There’s no way we can get back together. But I thought it’s best to just talk to him and simply clear things out. Who knows, maybe we can remain friends?”

She sighed and took a seat beside me. “That’s something you will totally do. Can’t you do something for yourself just for once? I know you still like him so why can’t you guys get back together?”

“Easy to say, hard to do unnie… You should know WINNER just debuted. I can’t just step my foot in and ruin his life!”

“Trust me, your absence is what’s ruining his life.”

I remained speechless and shook my head at her words. “You don’t understand. He’s in a group! What about the rest of WINNER? I made up my mind already and there’s nothing that can change it.”

“Yunju-ah, sometimes, you’re just SO stubborn!” She rolled her eyes. “WINNER has a schedule today. I don’t know when you’re able to talk to him.”

“That’s okay. I actually don’t even know how to face him…” I buried my face in my hands.   

“Why don’t you spend some time on your own first? I got to head to the company to help Big Bang with some stuff. They probably left by now.” She frowned. “Good thing there’s a second van to pick up the rest of us. I should get going.”

“Yeah, don’t mind me here! I promise I’ll keep your place clean!”

She smiled at me. “I’ll be back soon then we can get ready together and head for the restaurant tonight.”

I stayed silent. “Is… Is he going to be there too?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know. Their schedule nowadays is fully packed. I’m not sure if they need to film for Inkigayo tonight. Do you want me to ask Sungmin-shi?”

I immediately shook my head. “That’s okay… It’ll buy me some time before I actually have to face him.”

“Aish, Yunju-ah, I really don’t know what you’re thinking of… First you came all the way here to talk to him and now you’re saying you want to buy some time before meeting him?” Hyejin shook her head disapprovingly. “Whatever. I’ll leave now, see you later!”

I managed to whisper out a farewell before she slammed her front door shut. I lay down on her couch, studying the apartment that I used to live in. And somehow, the homey feeling got me falling asleep.

---

song4 k will- you don't know love

A very excited Hyejin pulled me into a casual restaurant that evening situated in Hongdae. I couldn’t believe she picked a restaurant right smack in the heart of Seoul. How can she forget about the people we work with? Unless she doesn’t expect any of them to actually show up. I frowned slightly by that thought. I have rehearsed my speech with Taehyun in my mind for the hundredth time before I had the courage to step out of Hyejin’s apartment earlier.

Once we got to the little room situated in the back of the restaurant, a few of Hyejin’s friends and a few ex-colleagues that I used to work with in YG began waving at us, shouting “happy birthday Hyejin-ah!” at the same time. I smiled at the people who gave me a confused look, probably wondering why I’m back in Seoul all of a sudden. However, I’m extremely glad they didn’t question me about it, hoping they just assumed I’m back for my friend’s birthday.

As the night deepened, guests stopped coming in. Bom and Dara actually showed up, coming in with a grin as they took off their disguise. Bom unnie also fled to my side after greeting Hyejin and pried about my life in Busan. I suddenly missed everyone so much, seeing the smiles situated on all my ex-coworkers made me feel warm inside, and it definitely made me feel like I still belong within the group. I stayed quiet and didn’t really talk for the rest of the night.

Of course, none of the WINNER members would come since they’re busy these days. What was I thinking of? Hyejin noticed my behaviour and finally pulled me aside. “Yah… Why don’t you just go find Taehyun? He’s probably going to be at the company or their dorm.”

I shook my head. “I feel like maybe it just wasn’t meant for us to meet again.”

Hyejin rolled her eyes. “Don’t be silly now. You can’t just leave everything up to fate. You got to take action sometimes!”

“Don’t force me…” I blurted out when some drunk friends dragged Hyejin back to the table. I lifelessly walked out of the restaurant and took a seat on a random bench outside. I stared at the crowds before me, making me reminiscing about my life back in Seoul before I moved to Busan. The enthusiastic crowds, the awesome live performances, and the memories I had with Taehyun. A smile crept onto my face as I stared down the exact same street where Taehyun and I fled away from his fan girls the day I confessed to him.

I laughed. I wonder if the coffee shop with the stingy owner is still here…

I slowly got up on my feet again and began walking in between the groups of people on the busy streets. It was dark as the sun has set already but I somehow still managed to find the café I was looking for. The lights inside were still on and I quietly entered the shop.

Just like the first time I entered, there was no one inside except for the grumpy owner standing behind the cashier. It was just like that time, except I entered alone today.

“What would you like to have this evening?” He asked, not really paying attention to me and still looking down, typing away on his phone.

“Um… I’ll just take an Americano.”

He lifted his head up and gave me a glance before placing his phone down and turning away to get to work. I observed the shop again, noticing the table that Taehyun and I hid under. I chuckled to myself but the owner turned around and thought I was weird. I awkwardly scratched the back of my head and bowed at him.  In no time, he finished preparing my drink and he hastily placed it on the table. “Here’s your coffee.”

“Thank you.” I quickly said and took the paper cup away.

“You look really familiar.” The owner suddenly began to say.

There’s no way he will remember me! It was months ago! But… I guess there really isn’t a lot of customers who would fling out bills and ask to hide under your table.

“Uh…”

“IT’S YOU!” The owner looked shocked and pointed his callused finger at me. “You came here to hide under the table that day! Huh… small world. That guy you were with was just here and ordered the same drink as you did.”

“Excuse me?”

“Don’t pretend that you weren’t that girl. I recognize people quite easily. Ask your friend if he came earlier then you’ll know what I’m talking about!” He boasted his keen memory with a grin.

“No I meant… He was here earlier?”

The owner’s expression turned serious again. “Well, yes. I’m positive it was him.”

“How long ago? Where is he? Where did he go?” I began blabbering questions at the man before me frantically.

“Look missy. That friend of yours left approximately a few minutes before you entered. How would I know—“

I quickly booked out of the café and ran down the dark streets. I silently wished for the lights to be a little brighter as it is difficult to make out people’s faces in this crowded area. Worst of all, Taehyun would be in disguise, wouldn’t he? After apologizing to a gazillion people for bumping into them accidentally, I slowed down my pace.

I mentally cursed at myself, for bringing myself hope and then suddenly having it vanishing away within seconds. I sighed as I continued walking around the area, trying my best to get a glimpse of the person who I have been meaning to see. But luck wasn’t on my side.

I finally halted to a stop when I noticed people crowding around a street performance. Hearing the music lingering in the background, I decided to check out what was so interesting that captured everyone’s attention.  Standing on my tippy toes, I managed to peek at the duo that were singing and playing an acoustic guitar. The melody was nice and upbeat while the vocalist’s voice was very soothing and easy to listen.

Somehow, their music reminded of the times I was with Taehyun. I chuckled. Maybe I’m just imagining things at this point. Without knowing, I stood in place for the rest of the performance. It was when the audience began clapping at the end of the song that brought me back to reality. Soon, people began scattering away, leaving just the duo standing in the middle to pack up.

I wasn’t sure why I didn’t leave. Maybe because deep down inside I knew I had nowhere to go. I couldn’t possibly head back to Hyejin right now since she will nag me and send me off to see Taehyun. And at the same time, I didn’t know how to approach him anymore.

It must have been a mistake to come back to Seoul.

song5 clazziquai- she is

I was just about to leave when I noticed there was also someone standing there, staring at the duo that just finished performing. Did that person like their music as much as I did? Did it remind them of their past as much as it reminded me of mine? Everyone has their own story to share but I wasn’t sure what made this person stand here for so long. Maybe they had a past just as miserable as mine. Suddenly, I didn’t feel so lonely anymore.

I took another glance at the person and that was when they noticed me as well and returned the same questioning gaze I had. I almost tilted my head to the side as I questioned myself why someone has to wear shades in the evening. But then a lump got caught in my throat as the person’s posture suddenly stood straight up, as if surprised or shocked.

Then something clicked in my head when I recognized who I was staring at. I should have known. And that was exactly when time stopped flowing for me, just like the time when I was looking for him at the intersection. Except this time, it seemed like he was looking specifically for me as he began walking, almost charging towards me.

I panicked and began walking backwards. Clasping onto my bag even tighter, I decided to turn around and run for it. But I was too late but he spoke, “Noona!”

I jolted as my body reluctantly forced itself to a stop. I swear I can recognize that voice anywhere, any day, any time. What was he thinking? We are in the middle of the streets!

“Noona!” This time the voice was even closer and before I knew it, a hand grabbed onto my arm and turned me around. I didn’t dare to look up. As much as I yearned to look at him and craved to be in his embrace, I didn’t dare to do so. I was afraid. Afraid that if I see him, I wouldn’t be able to handle letting him go again. The thought taunted me so much.

“Let me go!” I yelped, trying my best to swing his grip away. “Taehyun, let go of me!”

 “I let you go once already, I won’t let you go again.”

I uncontrollably shook my head but he finally captured me in his arms. I couldn’t do anything but began tearing up. Why did it have to end up like this?

“Shh… I know what happened, Jihyun told me everything. Why didn't you tell me about it?”

“Please stop this… There are people everywhere!” I managed to whisper out. “You can get in trouble.”

“I don’t care anymore!” He yelled out and held onto my shoulders and stared into my eyes. “Did you know how long it took me to find you?” I shook my head, stubborn in hearing any of his explanations. “Why did you have to go through that alone? Was our relationship so fragile to you?”

I sniffed and bit my lips. “I can’t possibly ruin you… Being with me in only going to bring you down. Why can’t we just remain friends? Both you and I know we can’t possibly be together right now. But if you’re being like this then I have no choice but to leave you again, as a stranger this time.”

“Why do you have to think that way?”

As he raised his voice higher, more pedestrians began paying more attention at us.

“Shhh!!” I tried to shush him. “Shut up or people will recognize you!”

“Why are you so selfish? Why can’t you think from my perspective? What if this isn’t what I want at all? Why do you always have to have your way and I can’t have mine?” He reasoned. I finally had the courage to look up at him and I wish I didn’t. He slowly took off his sunglasses and placed his hands on my cheeks. His expression so desperate, I instantly felt guilty for even leaving Seoul. “Don’t you understand? I love you…”

I love you

Those three words. So simple yet so meaningful for us. My body quivered and I suddenly hear a squeal nearby. Some girls on our right is now pointing at Taehyun with one hand and taking out her phone to capture a picture with the other.

“Taehyun-ah, run! Get out of here before more people recognize you!” I pried his hands off me and attempted to shove him away. However, he simply grabbed me into a tight hug and stayed silent, pushing my head into his shoulder with his hand. I unconsciously hugged him back, taking in his scent that I missed so much and relaxing into his touch that can only comfort me.

I forgot how much I missed hugging him.

“I’m not letting you go again.”

“You’re so silly. We’re at the worst place to do this.” I said, my voice muffled by his shirt.

“This is the best place to do this.” He abruptly released our hug and ran over to snatch away the acoustic guitar that the performer was using earlier by mumbling a ‘let me borrow this for a sec.’

I stared at his back, unsure of what he wants to do next.

Taehyun managed to situate himself in front of the microphone that the two were using earlier as well. He cleared his throat and prompted himself down, sitting cross legged and laid the guitar across his lap. I stared at him, confused.

“Remember the time when I said I was learning guitar?” His faced me as his voice echoed through the microphone, capturing even more people’s attention. Many people now stopped in front of us to see the commotion. I squinted my eyes shut and nodded at him.

“I wrote you a song. Can you at least give me one more chance and listen to it? Then I will have no regrets.” He smiled weakly and then he brought up his gaze to meet mine again. His eyes looked so hopeful and sincere. I contemplated what to do, but couldn’t find myself to object him. I nodded again.

He smiled that beautiful smile of his as his eyebrows slanted downwards and his eyes turning into slits. He cleared his throat and began strumming the guitar. By this time, a bunch of people are huddling around us, watching silently while others were whispering to each other ‘isn’t he that new singer from YG?’ and some others said ‘what is he doing here?’

song6 10cm- it's so nice

I don’t know what to do with myself
You’re beautiful, even when you don’t smile
I’m so happy by just looking at you
You drive me crazy

I paused as he began singing and I quickly reminded myself of why I fell in love with him in the first place. That carefree personality, that quirky smile, and that voice of his. No, that AMAZING voice of his.

Even the sound of your snore sounds cute
You smell sweet, even when you stink
You radiate even when you didn’t shower
You drive me crazy

I chuckled to myself, recalling the times when Taehyun accompanied me by my bedside when I slept. Did he really have to comment on the times when I didn’t shower before sleeping as well? I immediately face palmed myself as some of the strangers looked at me, disgusted.

What if I really go crazy?
What if I stop breathing all of a sudden?
The sleep in your eyes to me is
It’s so nice, so nice, so nice
The hole in your tights to me is
It’s so nice, so nice, so nice

Another smile crept onto my face when I remembered our trip to Japan and when we were casually walking to the ramen store when he commented on the hole in my tights. Now, even more people are gaping at me as they listened to Taehyun sing. However, he simply smiled and looked me in the eye, disregarding all the comments made by others as if there is only me and him occupying the street.  

A second, a minute is like a jewel to me
Don’t have the time to fight because
We don’t even have enough time to love
You drive me crazy

I pursed my lips as I listen to his lyrics— all the words that he wanted to tell me from the misunderstanding although we were apart.

What if I really go crazy?
What if I stop breathing all of a sudden?
The seaweed on your teeth to me is
It’s so nice, so nice, so nice
Even your small s to me is
It’s so nice, so nice, so nice

I laughed out loud immediately as I remembered the expression he made when he ate the kimbap I made with so much vinegar and salt. And, wait, what? “YAH!” I literally screamed. I can’t believe he just said that publicly.

I don’t know what to do with myself
You’re beautiful, even when you don’t smile
I’m so happy by just looking at you
You drive me crazy
You drive me crazy

He finally ended the last note of the song and stood up, placing the guitar down. Everyone suddenly began clapping, while others began to store away their phones after recording what just happened.

‘Who is she? Was that a confession song?’

‘Is that his girlfriend?’

‘That was so sweet!’

I began hearing a mix of comments as Taehyun walked towards me again. Did he really just sing that song for me in front of everyone? He grinned and I couldn’t help myself but to return an equally bright smile. How could I even think of leaving him when I know I still like him so much?

“So… Will you stay by my side this time?” He suddenly asked, his face turning timid as he stared at me for a reply. “I promise I’ll be good.”

Many people around us gasped but Taehyun took no notice of it at all. Does he know his career could be ruined? But I didn’t have the heart to even think of reject him again. If he can ignore all the others, why can’t I? As his girlfriend, shouldn't I be the one to support him? I cannot bring him down.

I finally smiled and nodded at him, reaching my arms out to give him a hug. He immediately beamed. “I know you wouldn’t say no to me! I mean… Who can resist me?”

“Yah! After all these months you’re still so narcissistic??” I commented.

“But you like it.” He retorted with a smirk.

I pulled away and studied his face. We laughed and I replied sheepishly, “I guess I do.”

---

Authors note :

Holy crap. That was the longest chapter I have ever written in my entire life! 7,058 words! Omg. Crazy. I actually wanted to split it into two parts but decided against it since you all have been waiting so patiently so I’ll just finish the chapter off :3

I know it’s not the best ending since it’s not very plausible but that scene where he sings to her in public was what I wanted to put since the very beginning. Except it was a whole lot more dramatic with heavy rain and all that jazz in my mind. I have already cut all those cheesy details out.

I may or may not write an epilogue for this but I most likely won’t since I started my second fic featuring KangNam (please check it out by the way if you haven’t) so I want to go ahead and get my hands on that now. I’m also sorry if the ending for this seems rushed… I just wanted to end it so that I can focus on the kangnam fic.

Oh yeah, a lot of you have been asking me about my trip to Korea and the YG family concert. Um… It will probably get very long so if you are actually interested, leave me a comment and I’ll probably write a side note with a chapter 21 or something.

I hope you all liked the final chapter and the story overall. It’s my first fic and I had a lot of fun and enjoyed writing for the most part. Thank you for staying with me till the end! I would love your feedbacks. Thank you for your time reading this!