We had finished Abby's funeral, and we were driving home. It was sunny outside, atleast Abby could go with decent weather. Nobody said anything, not even the radio was on. I drooped my head on the window with a thud. Today was going to be the worst day ever. Sungjong called in sick for me. I was actually sick though, with a cold and with some sadness, the sadness didn't help me get any better.

We had finally reached home, dragging myself up the stairs I entered my room and jumped on my bed burying my face with a pillow so noone could hear me cry. All of a sudden a huge wave of anger washed over me. What did I do to deserve this. Did I do something wrong. I didn't do anything!

I jumped off my bed and threw everything off my desks. I went up to my mirror and punched it. I didn't want to look at myself anymore. Kicking my window and the wall I grabbed a lighter grabbed some useless sheet music and went to the pool. I was mad but that didn't mean I was crazy.

My room was a total mess, my bed has blood and tears soaked into it. Paper was thrown around the room, the flower vase cracked and the foliage was spilling out of it. I stopped when I went to the picture of me and Abby laughing in the park. Thats when I grabbed the sheet music.

There wasn't anything special on them, I was just so mad I needed to set something on fire. I sat nearby the pool, ripped the papers in shrapnels and lit them. I could feel the fires breath my face but I didn't care.

"~~~~~~! Unlock the door!" I could hear Woohyun and Hoya jostling the door. I ignored them, I didn't care about my safety so I just looked into the fire.

I grabbed the papers and threw them into the pool, fizzling away. One of the sparks had attacked my face, and it drew blood. Don't know how, just did. There were more thuds and jostles at the door. Grabbing my lighter, I was ready to light the next pile.

Once I was done dripping blood and tears onto the papers I lit them. I wasn't sure if they had lit more or not but I think they did light more, since there were more banging against the door. More sparks flew on my face as I threw the pile into the waters. That was when I heard a crash at the door. Sunggyu and Dongwoo had kicked the door (it was glass). My eyes were too smokey from my tears, but I could still see Dongwoo and Sunggyu race to me.

They had each grabbed an arm, but I was so tired from the recent events. I was limp, puddy in their hands, the blood on my face slowly trinkled its way into my eyes, making my tears worse. There was a lot of shouting but I could depict each and every one.

"~~~~~! Why would you do such a thing, you coudl've killed yourself!" Sunggyu.

"Don't you know how dangerous that was!" Dongwoo.

"Oh my god her arm!" Hoya.

I didn't know that some of the fire had burned my arm and drew blood. I didn't care, I had lost all of my sanity so what was a couple burns and scrapes here and there. It was worse when I was a child, being in an abused family, they had hated me so much they locked me in my room and burned the house. I almost lost some limbs and an eye, but there was a burn on my stomach, a reminder of that dreadful day. But now there would be a matching one on my arm. A reminder of this one.

I don't remember what happened after that, I just woke up in a hospital. My arms were really heavy, did I lose them? I sat up and saw that it was just Sunggyu and Dongwoo, each had an arm as a pillow.

"Your finally awake!" Sungyeol rejoiced. Dongwoo and Sunggyu woke up instantly, everyone rushed to my side. My eyelids drooped with insanity.

Of course I asked the obvious. "What happened?"

"Well first," Sungjong began, "You had gotten a burn on your arm, then you just passed out." I looked at my newly acquired "tattoo" The burn was like a snake that had been cut open and dried. It sprawled and slithered its way on my arm, forever asleep. I felt a twang on my stomach . .  and a growl.

Woohyun quickly offered me food, and I wasn't slow to hesitate. Sunggyu and Dongwoo quickly got off my arms, my limbs enlighted that they were free. Finishing the soup ( figured I couldn't take solids) I tried to stand up. But I felt a strain on my chest, I had some wires attatched to my chest that kept my inable of moving from my bed. I heaved a great sigh.

"Don't worry we'll be he-" Sunggyu was interupted by his watch.

"Sorry ~~~~~~, we gotta go practice." They had their year break cut off, I didn't mind though, their fans had to be fed with something. Coincedently their fans hadn't attacked me or anything, but I was awaiting the day they would. My knives, baseball bat, and old mma gear waited for me, ready for combat.

"Bye." I said as they all waved, leaving Dongwoo and Sunggyu in the room. They kissed either side of my cheeks and I couldn't help but smile.

"Be safe" I said, it had become a habit ever since Abby passed away.

Dongwoo chuckled " Haha, you too!"

"Don't worry by the time you wake up we'll be here." Sunggyu smiled at me.

Before they had left, they had asked the nurse to give me some sleeping medication so I wouldn't have to wait for their arrival. How nice.

Thankfully it worked quickly.

By the time I woke up, there was already food on a tray infront of me. More soup, but it smelled delicous. I looked up to thank someone, but noone was there. Heaving another great sigh, I finished my soup, my side and slumped into my pillow. Noone had come to visit, maybe they thought I was a nuisance, I knew I was. I started to cry, just (silently there) was no point in putting in noise, I would just be more of a nuisance.

I heard the door open, but I thought it was just the nurse, to come and replenish my meds and whatnot.

"I'm glad you like the food I cook." I turned and almost knocked the bowl off the tray.

"Woohyun, what are you doing here, wheres everybody else?" I scoped the room.

"Oh, well since this would be the last time we could get to visit you today Sunggyu and Dongwoo got into a bit of an argument"

I chuckled, just like them to do that.

"Yea, well the rest of the group decided to let me in, but they also decided not to tell Sunggyu and Dongwoo." He explained, rubbing the back of his neck.

I laughed,"Haha, they're gonna love that."

He laughed his way over to me, wiped my tears, collected the bowl and sat down on a nearby chair.

"So have you been well." He asked.

I couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic or real.

"If by well you mean I've lost my best friend in the entire ing universe, almost got myself killed, lost all of my sanity and willpower, then yea, I've been well." I listed, ticking all the events off on my fingers.

"Sorry, I know everythings been hard lately." He apologized and took my hand. I shook back.

"It's alright, I know you didn't mean much by it." I sighed.

"Atleast your going to be discharged soon. It might even be later today." He smiled.

The nurse had come in and told Woohyun that his time was over. He looked at me at kissed me on the forehead. It wasn't like Dongwoo and Sunggyu, when they kissed me I felt things in my stomach, like butterflys . .  Yea, I couldn't explain it either. I could hear Woohyun talking to the nurse.

"Could you give her some more sleeping meds?" He asked. The nurse nodded, she seemed jittery, as if she was a fan. She was really thin too, I could see her bones stick out like broken glass. Woohyun waved at me as he exited the door and I shouted back.

"Thanks!" I laughed. The nurse sauntered her way over and took out a syringe.

"Seems like they really care about you." She said glumly.

"Haha, yea." I was still looking at the door. And then it hit me. What she took out wasn't a syringe, it was a knife. Thankfully I caught her just in time. But my hand was grasped against the blade, so naturally I bled. I could hear her struggle.

I.Got.Really.Pissed. Don't know why, maybe it was just that some ing stranger decided she could attack me, when she knew she couldn't.

"Haha, compared to what my step parents did to me, your just a ing . Did you really think you could kill me with that outfit on. Your the most pathetic person I have ever met." My words stung her like poison, whatever thats what I was going for anyway. Thankfully she did what I wanted, she put enough force on the blade that my hand stopped it at the hilt. At this point I didn't really give a , all the anger I had built up could be released, how lucky.

Who was this , thinking she could kill me? I ripped off the wires attatched to my chest, and sat up. I punched her in the face, she sprawled to the floor. Her nose started to bleed. I now had acquired the knife, I was good with these things. I twirled it. I could see her veins pumping in her neck.

"I actually went to a firearm school, did you know that?" I threw the knife so that it went right beside her head. I could see her veins pumping in her forehead, but I waited for her to calm down. That took a bit. I don't know why anyone wasn't in the room yet.

"Don't worry" , I consoled her, "I have no intention of killing you." She seemed to calm down right away.

"I just intend to fatily harm you.' I smiled.

I picked her up by the neck and threw her across the room, she stood up and held her hands in a position, telling me she was ready to fight. But just because I didn't go to mma anymore didn't mean that I didn't do it anymore. She ran at me. It was all wrong, her positon was terrible. I kicked her in the gut, and she went to the floor clutching her stomach.

I put her in a choke hold, but she was so skinny she slipped herself out. I don't know how an anorexic person like her thought she could take on someone like me. She ran at me again, but I dodged and kicked her in the calf, I heard a crunching noise and smiled. I was sure I had lost my sanity, I liked injuring this person. But whatever, I was pretty sure the hospital wouldn't blame me considering my mental conditions after yesterday. I punched her in the arm, enough to make the skin break.

She limped toward me, her nose bleeding. This time I was truly pissed, who did she think she was. But also at this time, Infinite walked in with the real nurse.

They walked in time to see that I had kicked her hard enough that she made a bit of a dent in the wall, she coughed some blood. The nurse rushed to her as I ripped some cloth from my shirt.

I was to be discharged from the hospital today, and Infinite had brought me some clothes. I looked at the girl with disgust. Once I was finished wrapping my hand, I quickly changed into my clothes, comfortable at last.

After analyzing the girl, everybody rushed toward me.

"Are you okay?" Dongwoo and Sunggyu seemed to ask at the same time. I smiled and nodded, I found it cute at how frail they thought I was.

"Wooooah, ~~~~~~ is soo cool!" I could hear Sungjong awe at me.

I told them I was fine and noticed that the girl was still there, so I walked to my bedside grabbed the knife out of the wall and threw it at her. It clipped her shirt to the wall. I ripped some more cloth from my shirt ( my belly was now showing) and wrapped her arm up. I looked at her and said

"Don't with me."

She seemed to get the message before I even said it. I walked arm in arm with Infinite to the car, along the way, though, they still seemed to be awestruck.