Yifan stares at his own reflection in the mirror of the boy's washroom. His hands were on either sides of the sink and he was breathing heavily.

When two boys had entered a while ago, he merely gave them one hard look and they scrambled back and out of the washroom. Leaving him alone again. They must've told the others that he was in there, because ever since then, nobody dared to come in. 

Yifan could only sigh at his reflection before he turns around. He leans on the sink and raises up his right arm where the self-made cuts were found. They were already starting to get better and the red color on it was turning dull. These weren't even new cuts, the last time he had touch a razor was two weeks ago when his mother had ran away. 

He was stupid for removing his blazer and to flaunt off his cuts. Now Sooyeon, out of all the people, saw it. The bratty, bossy, Jung Sooyeon. Yifan didn't like the fact that she knows about him harming himself now. He didn't like her, much more trust her. 

It was his little secret, him cutting himself, he kept it to himself and didn't tell anybody. Not even his older sister or Lijuang. Now, Sooyeon knew. Out of all the people, Jung Sooyeon had to be the one who first knew about it. 

His palms turns into fists just by the thought of it all. Him self-harming, her finding out.. it made Yifan nervous. What if she would tell? 

Maybe she wasn't like the other girls in their class or in school, but still, Yifan didn't trust her with this knowledge one bit. But he couldn't do anything about it now since she already knew. 

He groans and turns around to look at himself in the mirror one last time before going out of the washroom. 

Yifan runs a hand through his soft hair as he walks the halls of Cheongdam High. He was oblivious to the loving stares he got from the girls and the glares from some of the boys, he minded his own business and just walked towards his classroom. 

Lunch break would be ending soon. 

He checks the time on his watch and sees that there's only less than 15 minutes until the bell rings. He reaches his classroom, but the entrance is blocked by none other than Sooyeon. 

"Yah," she is leaning by the door frame, sticking out her arm to block the path; not allowing him to enter. Sooyeon looks up at him and tries not to think about what she had saw on his arm a while ago. "Didn't you listen to Mr. Oh yesterday? We're going to proceed to the gym immediately after lunch."

Yifan only rolls his eyes. 

"If you don't listen to the teachers, I wonder how you have such high grades." she says. 

He doesn't answer that. Instead, he just turns around and walks away, not bothering to ask why she was even there in the first place and not at the gym. 

Sooyeon looks at his back until he disappears around the corner. She lets out a heavy sigh. She had to admit, she was really worried about Yifan now that she knew he was depressed. Depression often could lead to suicide, and Sooyeon knew a pretty good example of that. 

"Tsk," Sooyeon scolds herself for even thinking about it. "Aish, Sooyeon," she says to herself. She had already promised that she will not let anyone go through that again, especially her. The pain and the hurt she felt when the incident happen.. it was almost unbearable for her the first time. How much more if it happened again? 

Sooyeon didn't want to think about it right now, but soon or later on, she knew she had to take action.

For the next 10 minutes, until the bell had rang, Sooyeon stood there in front of the classroom with a train of thoughts running through her head. Sooyeon stayed there until it was time to go, just like what Mr. Oh had told her to do. If ever anyone of her classmate would go there, she would remind them to go to the gym for their class. Just like what she did to Yifan. 

Sooyeon hurriedly walks towards the gym.

For now, she had to let him be. 

But soon, she knew she had to help him. 

\/|/\

The bell rang for the last time that day, signaling the end of classes. All the students who weren't cleaners for the day hurriedly got up and grabbed their things; all eager to go home early.

One person in particular was too eager that he forget he was part of the cleaners for today.

"Yifan," Sooyeon calls out at him. "He-hey!" she saw him leave the classroom and she runs after him and she's thankful that he hasn't walked off that far. "Yifan, you're a cleaner." Sooyeon says but he doesn't look back or stops walking. 

"I'll clean tomorrow." she heard him mutter. 

Sooyeon scowls. "No! You're a cleaner today. No excuses and nobody is an exception, alright? Not even you Wu Yifan." she says coldly. She glares at his back, then soon, at his face as he turns back to look at her, his face hard and annoyed. Well, that makes two of them. 

For 20 minutes, Yifan had to mop the floor of the classroom all by himself while the others swept or clean the windows and board. Sooyeon had assigned him the task of moping, which he considered the hardest chore to do here in school. 

When he was done, the floors were white and clean and everyone was free to go. 

Yifan was the last to get out of the room before Sooyeon could lock it. Before he did go out though, he made sure to give her one last glare for the day. She was really getting on her nerves now, and his annoyance towards the petite girl grew more and more each day. 

Sooyeon walks behind him, but she couldn't keep up with his pace for long due to his incredibly long legs. But Sooyeon's eyes are glued to the back of his head. 

Do it, Jung Sooyeon. Do it. she urges herself.

But no matter how much she tells herself this, she wouldn't do it. Not because she couldn't do it, but because she wouldn't do it. She could talk to Yifan nonchalantly but the problem is, he'll out on her again and get all annoyed, making the two of them frustrated and annoyed in the end. That's how their conversations ended these days and it made Sooyeon's mood turn sour. 

But she really had to do it, before everything was too late. Though, he didn't quite strike her as as person who would commit suicide (he had everything he could ever want and maybe even more), she still was going to trust her instincts and brains. And it told her to go and talk to him. 

Sooyeon already finds herself running towards him.. no, sprinting towards the guy.

Yes, Jung Sooyeon has lost her mind. But, Principal Lee and even his own father was counting on her to get to understand Yifan and help him out, she just had to do this. She couldn't fail this time.

"Yifan! Hey!" she shouts, but he doesn't hear her over the music that's playing in his ears through his earbuds. He only notices that she's following him when a hand reaches to touch his shoulder. 

It was a light touch but he felt it under his clothes. Yifan removes his earphones and turns around, a little bit surprised that Jung Sooyeon was behind him. "What the-?"

"Walk home with me," she managed to say through her panting. 

Yifan looks like he's disgusted by her suggestion. He raises an eyebrow up and looks weirdly at her. "You're-"

"Oh, I didn't mean it to come out that way." Sooyeon shakes her head from side to side. "That sounded wrong.. but, um, we need to talk." her voice sounded much more serious now and she meant business. 

Yifan tensed up by the tiniest bit, too tiny that even Sooyeon didn't notice the change in his breathing and heartbeat. "What-what.. what do we need to talk about? We have nothing to say to each other." he says, trying to keep his cool. 

Her features suddenly soften and she slumps a bit, her bag weighing her down. "Yifan, you have nothing to say to me. But I have lots of things to say to you." her voice turns from hard and serious to soft and tender just like that. Her eyes portray the concern for his well being and Yifan is confused. 

Why would she care about him? 

Oh yeah, Yifan rolls his eyes as a thought came to him. I'm supposedly here "responsibility". "Look here, Jung, you-"

"No, you look here Yifan, we need to talk now. Do you understand that? Or do I have to say it in English and Chinese?" she is now suddenly angry with him. From serious, to tender and now, to angry.

Yifan raises both his eyebrows. This girl confuses him. "You-" 

"We're going to talk now. We have to." she says in English and before Yifan could come up with a snarky respond, she says the same line in Chinese. 

Yifan snorts. "Why are you so persistent? Just let me be, Jung, you don't truly care about my well-being, why do you even bother with me?" he says, starting to get really annoyed by her now. 

"No, I do." Sooyeon says to him and herself. "You might be an , but you have a life. You're life.. it's precious and you shouldn't waste it. You don't have to commit suicide or-"

"Commit suicide?" Yifan cuts in. "Woah, wait, yes, I do self-harm, but I don't want to kill myself. That's just so wrong." he shakes his head and walks away from her. 

Seeing no other choice, Sooyeon follows him, groaning as she did. Why can't he just talk to her properly?  

"Just because I cut myself does not mean I want to die you know. I just want to relieve stress because cutting yourself releases endorphins that also releases stress and pain." he says, but Sooyeon already knew this. Ever since the incident, she had done research on self harm. "It feels good for a while, and later on, you'll feel nothing like numbness. And you know what, Jung Sooyeon?" he abruptly stops and turns around. 

Sooyeon almost bumps him but she too stopped walking at the right time. She literally had to look up at him because she was that short. "What?" but her tone still matched his. Cold, icy and hard. 

"I'd rather be numb for the rest of my life than feel pain." he says before walking ahead again. 

Sooyeon frowns. "So what? Are you saying that you're going to cut yourself over and over again just to get that feeling?" she ask, trying to keep up with his pace. "You do realize that maybe one day, you'll cut too deep and you'll hit a vein, immediately ending your life. You can't keep on doing this to yourself, you know. This is dangerous!" 

"But why do you care, huh?" he glances back at her. "Why do you even ing care?" 

"It's because you're the se-"her voice cracks and Sooyeon shuts close. No, no, no, no. She shakes her head, trying not to think about the past, about the incident. She stops walking in the middle of the town square as her mind is clouded and being haunted by her past. 

Yifan notices that it's quiet and when he stops to look back, he sees Sooyeon a few feet away. She looks pale to him. "Yah," he turns around to face her, a scowl on his face. "What? You can't find a good enough reason?" 

She stands there, just staring at the ground with a frown on her face. She's too deep in thought that she doesn't even care if people are watching her. But when Yifan spoke up, Sooyeon snapped her head up too look at him. 

And its painful for her, because for a second, Yifan reminded her so much of him that it's scaring her. But she found some courage to speak up. "Will you at least let me help you?" her voice cracks slightly but Yifan doesn't notice this. 

"I don't want your help." he says, glaring at her before he turns around to walk away. He hopes for her to give up and walk home, but she's still following him. 

"But you need it." she says, making Yifan groan.

"No, I don't! I don't need your help! I don't want your help!" He's on the verge of screaming right then and there on the streets. He turns around once again to face her. "So just stop and give up, Jung." he spats at her. 

She is unfazed by his words. She just stands there and looks up at him. "You know if you could just hear me out.. if you could just let me in.. I know I can help you, Yifan. I know I can." Sooyeon stops in her tracks too and they both lock eyes. 

Yifan only snorts and walks away. 

This time, Sooyeon doesn't follow him. 

\/|/\

That night, Yifan wanted to sleep with his older sister again. But she was out of town for a friend's birthday party, maybe somewhere in Jeju island. 

Yuan was the first person he wanted to see when he arrived home, but when he read the letter she had written for him, he was crushed. He wanted her, he needed her so bad right now that it hurt him. And to think that he even considered on telling her about him cutting himself. Well, that thought was long gone once he reached his bed to sleep. 

But he kept tossing and turning around, unable to find peace in his mind and just sleep. There was too much going inside his head that night that he was too distracted to close his eyes. 

His thoughts all led to Sooyeon, and her weird behavior this afternoon.

She had followed him, telling him that she could help him, telling him that she cared, telling him to stop. Why was she like that? Why did she suddenly have a soft spot for him?

Yifan thought that maybe because she pitied him when she found out that he harms himself. But that only makes him groan. That's why he only kept it to himself, he didn't want anyone to know because for sure they'll take pity on him and Yifan doesn't want that. 

Or maybe Sooyeon is just really serious about the 'you-are-my-responsibility' part she has to play on him so he wouldn't screw himself up in that damn school. 

So many thoughts, so many possibilities were in his head. And he just lays there on his bed, thinking them all through until he got tired and would eventually fall asleep. 

Yes, that was his plan. 

He stares up at the ceiling with his hands behind his head. He thought that it was ironic. Just when he gave up on finding someone, anyone, who cared for him at all, who would understand him and help him get through this.. she suddenly came in the picture. 

\/|/\

I'd rather be numb for the rest of my life than feel pain. 

Those words replayed through Sooyeon's head as she lay awake on her bed at half past 10 in the evening. No matter what she did, she could not sleep and she finally gave up trying to at around 9. 

She was too preoccupied with her thoughts to rest. Her thoughts of Yifan and on how she could help him. 

After the last time she had met a transferee, things did not go so well with them and Sooyeon doesn't want that to happen again. She has to prevent those events from happening and she had to make her move, she had to take action and help Yifan no matter how stubborn and distant he was. 

Sooyeon wasn't all that bad really, she cared for people ever since the incident. It was like a wake up call for her, and it had hit her hard. Even up to now, it still made an impact in her life. 

She had so many regrets, she made too many mistakes with him that it had haunted her for the rest of her life. The memories and conversations they had.. were all so clear in her mind. 

She couldn't let it happen to Yifan, no matter how arrogant and cold he may seem. And even though she didn't like him, she was not going to let it happen to him. 

It was around 11 PM in where Sooyeon finally closed her eyes. She slept with the thoughts and memories of her past haunting her mind. 

Guys! Happy Valentines Day! 
Haha. For the FIRST time in FOREVER, I received flowers from someone, and it's actually a GUY. :O
Woooah. Nobody gave me chocolates tho. -.- I was so hungry today that I almost thought that the
roses I received could be food. :3 nyehe.
Don't mind me, I'm surrounded with good vibes today. ;)
What did you guys get for Valentines? Comment belooooow~!