Melody Of The Night

Author : Xiuminbaozi99 | Baby98

Genre : Romance

Status : On-going

Title ( 9/10 )

Your title is beautiful, though it isn't very eye-catching, it is still beautiful. So 9 points for that! Good job!

Description & Foreword ( 9/10 )

Your description was flawless, however I was quite confused over one sentence though. The first sentence that is in italics. That was supposed to be Seonyul's thoughts right? But she didn't even notice him in the story, so how did she even have this thought? Sorry if i'm wrong but I kind of skimmed through your story cause it was too long, but i'm kind of sure that she didn't spot the 'mysterious guy' before. Do correct me if i'm wrong. And do put something in your foreword besides the credits!

Grammar & Language ( 16/20 )

Your grammar and language was good and there weren't that much mistakes. However the few mistakes that you made was probably because you haven't proofread your story so do remember to proofread them after you post them. I'll only point out errors in the first chapter. 1st line , "And inserted it into the rusty old lock that was hanging onto the metal bars." The second error in that line(the second bolded phrase) is actually optional, but it would be good too if you were to put those two words into the sentence.

The first line of the second paragraph , "Right now, Seon-yul is on her way to the music room located in the art building of her of her old high school." This sentence seems kind of strange. And also the sentence , "She comes here everyday to play her violin." These two sentences makes it sound like a script, you should join these two sentences so that it wouldn't really sound like a script. "Seon-yul walked towards the music room that was located in the art building in her old high school, she usually comes here everyday to play her violin." The correct sentence sounds more better right? There are a few other sentences that sounded like scripts, since I already gave an example, try to change them like how I did ^

Character ( 19/20 )

The way you expressed Seon-yul was perfect but Xiumin's character needs a little more elaboration and as for Baekhyun since his character is just one of the side characters, the amount of elaboration you gave Baekhyun was just right. Good job on this section!

Originality & Storyline ( 17/20 )

Although there are stories that are similar to this, the plot was very well used and I give you a thumbs up to that, there isn't any part that confused me but I think this story was kind of too fast for my liking. But if the 2 became quite good friends within the one month, shouldn't Seon-yul know that Xiumin's real name is Minseok? Haha, I have nothing else to penalize you for so the missing 3 points was because of what I stated above ^

Overall ( 70/80 )

Overall I think this story is quite good and I read the 11th chapter because I couldn't stop reading, LOL. But yeah, do proofread your story oftenly to point out careless mistakes and good job! Once again thank you for requesting at KMS & HMH Review Shop, remember to credit the shop in your foreword so I can cancel your name off the request list and do remember to comment after you've credited! Have a nice day~