Denial

Waiting for You

Woohyun was terrified.

Oh my god, Sunggyu is kissing me.

His senses failing him. He had no guts to stop him or say anything, the self-proclaimed kingka taking it upon himself to take control and kiss Woohyun on the lips. Sunggyu focused in, his hands digging into Woohyun's shoulders and his eyes closed to hold him close. There was no movement with their lips. There was no . There was no warning. It was simply the two of them pushing their faces against each other. Woohyun's arms straightened down his waist, arching his back to try and get away from Sunggyu's hold subtly. It was no such luck, Sunggyu's venom poisoning Woohyun into paralysis.

In his awkward state, there was only one option. There was one other thing he could try:

Woohyun closed his eyes.

Trying to see where this would all go. Where this senseless kiss would take them and what it all meant. Woohyun slowly raised his hands, holding onto the arms of Sunggyu's jacket and scrunching his face so his eyes were closed shut. Their noses pressed together, nothing else happened in that room for the next 30 seconds, upholding their kiss with seemliness and a whole lot of awkwardness.

Finally after a minute of the most boring kiss in the history of their lives, Sunggyu pulled his head back. Still holding onto each other, Sunggyu and Woohyun gazed into each other's eyes. Confused feelings clouding their adolescent minds. Everything was a one in a million chance, and with this next step something anew would come of their relationship. The kiss igniting a spark for the both of them. 

Or not.

"Did... did you just kiss me?!" Woohyun stuttered, jumping up off the floor and pointing his finger at Sunggyu.

"What?!" Sunggyu could feel the sweat drenching the back of his shirt, standing up and crossing his arms. "I... I did not..."

"You put your lips against mine!" Woohyun flailed his arms, almost infuriated by this mess. 

"Are you serious? I didn't kiss you at all! I... I tripped!" 

"No one stays on someone's lips for that long if it was accidental. You kissed me Sunggyu! What the heck, I've never even kissed a guy before!"

What did I do, what did I do? Sunggyu was not thinking all that much before he made the rash choice of committing his lips with Woohyun's. He stood there tapping his feet and fidgeting with his fingers nervously. "Well, maybe if I did..." He had a comeback. "You kissed me back!!"

"No I didn't! What do you mean I kissed you back?!"

"You could have pushed me off or done anything, but you didn't Woohyun. You kissed me back and you know it!"

What? No! No I didn't. Wait, did I? "You're lying! I didn't kiss you back."

"The point is, you kissed me back!"

"No, the point is you kissed me!" Woohyun almost lost his breath, clutching his chest and backing away from Sunggyu. 

I don't know why I did that. I don't know why I kissed him! Sunggyu was breaking down, rubbing his forehead to find some sense in himself and searching for a reason why he did it. "You know what! I'm leaving!" He made his decision, storming off to the door. He grabbed the handle, swinging it and taking one last look at Woohyun.

I KISSED WOOHYUN!

Disgust riddled his face, slamming the door behind him.

Woohyun shuddered, falling on top of his bed. Hak Yeon, money, his fractured wrist, Sunggyu's past. Nothing else mattered to him anymore. He screamed at the top of his lungs in anguish.

"OH MY GOD I KISSED SUNGGYU!"

 

(((())))

 

"So what ride do you think you're going to buy with the money?" Sungyeol asked, hugging his books as he strolled down the school hallways Monday morning to homeroom.

"Well, we have to discuss it this Wednesday and see what viable options we have. We made a lot!" Hayoung grinned, flocking close to Sungyeol with her head grazing against his shoulder. "I really hope we made enough money for the boat."

"The boat? Come on, that makes you so dizzy when you go upside down. Get the swinging ride!" Sungyeol suggested. 

"Maybe we should get the love boat," Hayoung giggled.

Sungyeol blushed a little.

"Why don't you get a ferris wheel?"

Sungyeol and Hayoung turned their heads to hear Myungsoo speak, his head lowered and his hands in his pockets as he watched each of his footsteps carefully, matching each one to the different tiles on the hallway floor. Myungsoo had been walking next to Sungyeol and Hayoung this whole time. He puckered his lips, acting like all of this was no big deal. "Everyone likes them."

Hayoung covered Sungyeol's ear. "Why is Myungsoo hanging out with us again?"

Sungyeol's body tensed up around Hayoung, and not in the way he wanted it. "Um, I have homeroom with him next," he cracked. 

Of course, there was more to it. It was Myungsoo's personal duty to chaperone Sungyeol until the further notice of Hak Yeon's intentions. After last Friday's incident, Sunggyu divided his friends to Dongwoo, Woohyun, and Sungyeol to watch over them for security and handle any situations with Hak Yeon and his gang. Myungsoo thought the whole situation was ridiculous but he knew his presence irked Sungyeol to some degree, so he freely went along with the idea. 

"A ferris wheel would be too big for the parking lot," Sungyeol hummed, avoiding any eye contact with Myungsoo and staring at the ceiling. 

"It would fit!" Myungsoo insisted. "Do you know how big that is?"

"But we have to consider the other rides and booths at the fair," Sungyeol groaned. His temper flared, and his glasses fell down his nose. He pointed them back up and snorted. "We can have better rides than a ferris wheel."

"Yeah, if you want the fair to be dumb and stupid like it always is!" Myungsoo rolled his eyes.

"The fair isn't stupid, you are!" Sungyeol barked.

"It's really not a big deal!" As the bystander to their petty argument over rides, Hayoung tiptoeing behind as Sungyeol and Myungsoo discuss this all the way to homeroom. She felt uncomfortable with Myungsoo around, but even more so she noticed changes in Sungyeol's attitude. Typically Sungyeol would do his best to avoid any kind of confrontation between Myungsoo, his group of friends, or any kind of person like them. For the past couple of weeks, Hayoung has noticed Sungyeol becoming more outspoken than usual, to the point of aggravating the conflict. Today Sungyeol was talking to Sunggyu before his first class, and now Myungsoo was following him like a hawk.

"Maybe you should be more open-minded." Myungsoo ended the conversation at that, disappearing through the homeroom doors and ignoring anything else Sungyeol had to say.

"Myungsoo!" Sungyeol clenched his fists and stomped on the ground. "Why does he have to be so annoying..." he muttered.

"Are you ok?" Hayoung grabbed onto Sungyeol's arm and spun him around, staring at the fury in his eyes. 

"Huh?" Normally the sensation of Hayoung's touch would drive him insane, halting any thoughts he had in mind to focus on her attention. Things have changed, and Sungyeol noticed himself no longer feeling the same way about Hayoung. This was a culmination of a few things, which included Sungyeol's alcohol stint, Hoya and Myungsoo's torture, and the inevitable conflict with Hak Yeon that he brought upon himself for following Woohyun last Friday night. He was expecting something terrible to happen today, so he cautiously walked the halls with Myungsoo as his own personal guardian angel to protect him from the evils of Cha Hak Yeon and his sidekicks.

And, there was another reason why Sungyeol had been acting different around Hayoung.

"I'm ok Hayoung. Why?"

Hayoung bit her lip before talking, afraid to commit to the idea that the Sungyeol she once knew was changing a bit. Sungyeol was still intelligent, nice to people around campus, but she questioned his gentle giant figure. Sungyeol personality has been increasingly turning bold, and it was a different kind of quality that Hayoung was not used to. "For the last two weeks, you've been acting different. You're irritated by a lot of things, and I was wondering if everything was ok?"

Hayoung... if only I could tell you everything.

The bell rang for the five minute warning, ringing through Sungyeol's ears and saving him a talk with Hayoung about how Woohyun pulled him down into a brawl to protect a guy he does not really like, as well as Dongwoo keeping a lot more secrets than he thought. "I'll explain it to you when we go too the movies this weekend, but for now I have to go to homeroom."

Hayoung nodded her head, forcing a smile for Sungyeol before she left. 

The guilt was tearing Sungyeol up. The fear was eating him alive. Sungyeol lived what many parents and teachers around the campus called the perfect life, with little to no problems at school, a good reputation, and a very respectable personality. Things were different, and he was unsure if he still like himself for what he did. He walked into homeroom, spotting an empty seat next to Woohyun.

Several students surrounded the class president at his desk, giving much attention to a green neon cast encapsulating his wrist for healing. Woohyun smiled as people took turns writing their regards for him in different colored markers on the cast before homeroom started.

"So you're out for the whole season?" a student asked.

"Unfortunately," Woohyun shrugged, using every muscle possible to smile for everyone around him even if he felt like deep down.

Sungyeol observed his friend, pitiful for him and the sacrifices he made to get Sunggyu out of the rut. He tried to understand why Woohyun would do something like that, with a risk of jeopardizing his whole baseball career, all for his coworker who was never up to good. Though Sunggyu had been nicer to Sungyeol within the past couple of weeks, he had a hard time wrapping around his head why Sunggyu was worth it. Then again, Sungyeol did tag along, which meant deep down a small inkling in his heart also cared about Sunggyu's safety.

"Hey! Yeollie-boo."

Sungyeol caught Myungsoo sitting by the windows, his arm hovered around the back of the empty seat next to him. Myungsoo smirked winked at him and blew him a kiss. "Today, you sit next to me!"

Dear lord up high, please give me patience to deal with my shortcomings. I am the better person, and help me not strangle Myungsoo.  "Coming Myungsoo," Sungyeol muttered, pouting the way to his seat next to Myungsoo.

People took their places in class with minutes before homeroom started. At that moment, Sunggyu walked into homeroom with a stench of cigarette smoke wafting in the classroom air. With a heavy heart from last Friday and the guilt of bringing his problems onto three innocent people, he was dreading homeroom the whole day because of who he would see.

Woohyun sat with his straightened back faced away from the back door, immediately recognizing the presence of Sunggyu in the room due to his uniform reeking with tobacco. At the corner of his eye, he saw that the seat next to him was empty.

Sunggyu tried to find a spot, any spot, away from Woohyun. But instead he found an empty chair next to the injured class president, the only one left in the whole classroom. "Aish..." he grumbled, stomping towards it.

Woohyun could hear the steps of Sunggyu moving closer, the scent of cigarettes growing stronger. It could only mean one thing: Sunggyu was going to sit next to him. "Aish..." he grumbled, twirling a pencil between his fingers. At the corner of his eye, Sunggyu threw his bag on the floor and pulled the seat back. Woohyun turned his head slightly to look outside the window and prevent any confrontation with him. Not only did he have to suffer the consequences of Hak Yeon's wrath, but now he was in a strange predicament of prioritizing which situation was worse: out of the baseball team for the year, suffering a beatdown with Hak Yeon, Dongwoo and Sungyeol also in trouble, or locking lips with the man sitting right next to him in homeroom.

To him, all things were equally terrible.

"Hey Woohyun, can we talk?" Sunggu started, twiddling his thumbs. He had a lot of things to say.

"Do you really want to talk about this now?" Woohyun asked, his heart racing fast and nervous for their impending conversation.

"How do I say this?" Sunggyu took a deep breath, leaning close to Woohyun to whisper. "Last Saturday never happened. I think after all the emotions from last Friday, I think that umm..." Sunggyu had trouble putting his words together.

"We got too excited?" Woohyun finished his sentence.

At the beginning of homeroom, Teacher Jung walked in. 

"Yeah." Sunggyu tried so hard all weekend to get the kiss out of his head. It was the only thing on his mind, and he battled thoughts on what it meant. An impulsive, in the moment kiss? An act of irony? 

Do I like him?

Sunggyu shook that idea off, because there was no possible way that he could like Woohyun. He had never had a crush on a male before, and he would not have one with Woohyun. They were friends, coworkers. At least that was what Sunggyu told himself. "So, sweep this under the rug and forget about it?"

The whole class turned their attention to Woohyun, waiting for the class president to start his greeting for the beginning of homeroom. Woohyun did not immediately start off because him and Sunggyu were whispering to each other and he was personally not paying attention to his surroundings to see that Teacher Jung stood in the front of the class, leaning against the desk impatiently for him to speak. "Woohyun."

Woohyun wished he had more time to reflect on the kiss, but with a lot of things in his life crashing down on him there was too much on his mind. If he could check off one problem in his life there would be less to worry about. He had barely any time to consider his feelings on the kiss, and why he kissed Sunggyu back. Woohyun shook it off. "I don't want things to be awkward here or Guk Pan. I've never kissed a guy before. We were caught in the moment, and that was it," he declared. "After all, we have a lot of bigger things to take care of."

Sunggyu nodded his head. "Agreed. This never happened."

"Nam Woohyun," Teacher Jung declared with a stern voice. Her vibrance scared Sunggyu and Woohyun, turning to see the whole class staring at them. "I would appreciate it if the class president would pay closer attention to the homeroom etiquette. Now please greet the class, unless talking to Sunggyu is a lot more important."

"NOTHING IS GOING ON!" Suddenly, Sunggyu stood up in the middle of class for what would be the most humiliating word vomit of his life. "Teacher Jung, we all do respect but I can talk to Woohyun whenever I want! Woohyun is just a friend! All of you need to realize that. Nothing is going on right now, and it's my right as a citizen of this country to talk to anyone without the suspicions of everyone around me. Nothing happened, ok?!"

Everyone in classroom was utterly confused at Sunggyu's intense impromptu speech in the middle of class. The students were a little scared with the frustration in Sunggyu's voice. Sungyeol and Myungsoo's jaw dropping expressions said it all, thinking that this all related to the events of last Friday. Teacher Jung sat on the desk horrified, only asking Woohyun to start morning homeroom and receiving this instead. 

What did he just say?! Woohyun slumped in his seat, hiding his eyes with his hand in shame.

What did I just say?! Sunggyu's mouth was dry. He cleared his throat to break the silence in the middle of class, trying to smooth his way out of that moment by casually sitting back in his seat like nothing happened. He elbowed Woohyun in the shoulder. "Hey Woohyun... you should greet homeroom now."

 

(((())))

 

"What was homeroom about?!" Myungsoo bugged his friend, punching him lightly in the shoulder until he spoke. "You're lucky Teacher Jung didn't give you a detention for that! Good thing her and almost the whole administration is afraid of you."

"Shut up." Sunggyu shoved his own head into his locker and left it there, hiding from the humiliation he caused himself and Woohyun in homeroom. He made the decision to keep his head in until next year. 

"You have to be more discrete about last Friday," Sungyeol scolded, locking up his stuff and walking over to Sunggyu's locker. "Not everyone knows about last Friday, you know."

"Oh yeah, last Friday." I totally forgot about that, I was thinking about... never mind. "I'm sorry if I'm in panic mode for everything," Sunggyu groaned. His voice echoed in his locker, distorting his usual colour into a lower tone.

Myungsoo chuckled. "You kind of sound like a baby who swallowed a frog."

"What does that even mean?" Sunggyu whined, pounding his fists into the lockers next to him.

"Happy Monday, Sunggyu!"

Sunggyu knew that voice. Hak Yeon. But before he could see him, he completely forgot his head was deep in his locker, twisting his body to turn around and smashing his head into the walls. "!" he screamed in pain.

"Hello Hak Yeon," Sungyeol twitched, tensing up and stepping back behind Myungsoo.

Sunggyu retreated his head from the depths of his locker, holding the side of his head with a scrunched up face. "Hey Hak Yeon."

Hak Yeon brought Won Shik with him, as well as Jung Taek Woon. Taek Woon was known as one of the most powerful people at school, holding boxing and taekwondo championships under his belt. He was tall in figure, but muscular. His cold stare was enough for anyone to get out of his way. Sunggyu, Myungsoo, and Sungyeol fixed their eyes on him. If Hak Yeon felt it necessary to bring him around, it only meant that something brutal was going to happen. "Sungyeol, you look good today," Hak Yeon smiled, pinching Sungyeol's cheek.

Myungsoo stuck his arm out to protect Sungyeol. "Stop Hak Yeon."

"Yeah, let's just get this over with. What do we owe you?" Sunggyu barked, continuing to rub his head from the previous pain. 

Hak Yeon snickered to himself. "Are you guys that scared of me?"

"Yes," Sungyeol mouthed, closing his eyes shut and praying to the heavens he would come out of this alive. His knees were shaking, Myungsoo had to hold him to keep him together.

"Whatever happened last Friday, I take all blame for it. You leave everyone out of it, and I'll do whatever it takes for you to leave them alone," Sunggyu promised. 

"We could care less about what you want," Won Shik snided.

"But I'll respect your wishes," Hak Yeon decided. 

Sungyeol was breathing heavily into Myungsoo's neck, the huffs and puffs uncomfortable for him. "Dude, calm down!" Myungsoo ordered.

"Really? Is it that easy?" Sunggyu was doubtful.

"Of course it's not that easy," Hak Yeon laughed. "You did complete the job for me, well Woohyun did. The money still holds, and I won't charge you any more. And I'll leave them alone for the most part."

"You don't mess with any of them, especially Woohyun." Sunggyu's nostrils flared, thinking back to how Woohyun fractured his wrist because of this mess. He felt responsible for Woohyun's life, and now that he kissed him he was the only person on his mind. 

"Don't worry I won't," Hak Yeon smiled. "Of course, there is one disclaimer."

"Of course," Sunggyu muttered to himself.

"What is it?" Myungsoo questioned.

"Tell me more about the pink-haired boy," Hak Yeon demanded.

"What? Dongwoo?" Sungyeol had not heard from Dongwoo since the Friday incident, but throughout the whole weekend he was the only person on his mind. The only person he was worrying about, and why he took down every one of them that night. "What about him?"

"We want to know more about him," Won Shik insisted.

Sunggyu shrugged. "I don't know. Sungyeol knows more than I do."

Sungyeol cleared his throat. "He's the new student from New York. He's lived there for five years until he came back to Korea. He has two older sisters, likes to dance, watch sports, he likes the color green, his favorite TV show is City Hunter, he likes to eat hamburgers..."

"Geez, how much do you know about this guy?" Myungsoo mumbled.

 I really don't know anymore... "A decent amount," Sungyeol laughed nervously.

"That's all I need to hear for now." Hak Yeon snapped his fingers for Won Shik and Taek Woon to follow him down the hallway.

"What... what do they want with Dongwoo?" Sungyeol stuttered. Dongwoo, why do they want to talk to you? Why only you?

"And why would they bring Taek Woon with them if he wasn't going to do anything?" Myungsoo wondered.

Sunggyu had an idea, especially with the way Dongwoo fought. He kept the idea to himself until he could better forumlate everything. "I don't know," he lied.

 

(((())))

 

With an eventful Monday coming to an end, Sunggyu and Woohyun closed up Guk Pan for the night. Sunggyu did a lot of the heavy labor, sweeping the floors and flipping chairs upside down to clean. Woohyun took care of the easy work, counting money and chopsticks. The two of them were relatively quiet throughout the whole shift, avoiding any interaction with each other for the past 5 hours. Sunggyu did his best to mind his own business, especially after today's homeroom fiasco. Woohyun worried about his wrist, taking quick glances at it every time he did something as a reminder that there are more important things than dealing with last Saturday. The both of them were stiff, an elephant in the room without any acknowledgement.

It was their first time working together since the kiss.

Boohyun walked out of the kitchen with a sweatshirt on, taking off his chef hat to leave. He noticed the atmosphere around the restaurant seemed a lot more awkward, and Sunggyu and Woohyun's dynamic was also different. They looked lifeless, emphasizing the little details of their work instead of acting natural with each other. It was very apparent that something happened, but it was different from when Sunggyu and Woohyun used to annoy each other when they first started working together. They're not mad at each other, but something else is going on... Boohyun raised an eyebrow. "How's it going in here?"

"Good hyung," Woohyun answered mindlessly, rubberbanding stacks of cash together.

"Yeah." Sunggyu continued wiping the floors.

One word answers? This is unlike them. Boohyun his lips, making his way towards the exit. "Woohyun, I'll see you later tonight."

"Bye hyung."

This is very strange. Boohyun opened the glass doors to the entrance, taking one last glance at Sunggyu and Woohyun working. Their movements almost seemed mechanical, as if they were actively trying to dodge each other. Boohyun shrugged his shoulders, leaving Guk Pan for the night.

The silence was slowly killing Sunggyu, but he had no heart to converse with Woohyun.

Woohyun also had enough with the hushness around the restaurant, reaching to his mp3 player to start a song up.

A strong instrumental resonated within their walls, the song booming in sound yet relaxing enough to ease any worry or tension. Sunggyu had never heard the song before, bobbing his head to the beat while he cleaned.

Woohyun closed the register to carry on to his next closing task, dealing with the office supplies behind the counter and restocking receipt paper. He hummed to the song, but his heart grew weary from listening to the lyrics. He paused midway to refilling the printer, his palms sweating from taking in the song.

Oh baby neomu joahseo 
you're driving me crazy.
Ni saenggangmanhaedo gibuni
Joah.
Gibuni joha gibuni
Joah. 
Na na na na na na
 
Sunggyu paused his cleaning to listen to the lyrics carefully. He lost all feeling in his arms to continue and color in his face, old thoughts coming into his mind from last Saturday. After trying to erase kissing Woohyun out of his head, the song would bring back a lot of that back and hit Sunggyu in the back of his head.
 
Joah.
Ni modeun geosi joah.
Meoributeo balkkeutkkajido.
Jogeuman haengdongkkaji hana hana.
Da joah.
Ni modeun geosi joah.
Neowa hamkkeramyeon jeulgeowo.
Sigani jinalsurok deo johajyeo.
 
Joah. Sunggyu, do I like you? Woohyun finished loading the receipt paper, leaning against the counter while attempting to twirl a marker with his working hand. There was never a good time for him to contemplate the meaning of kissing Sunggyu, After all, Woohyun did not stop him. No, I don't like him.
 

"Hey Woohyun." 

"Oh, what?" Sunggyu broke Woohyun's blank gaze by snapping his fingers in front of him. The marker flew off his fingers and almost rolled off the counter, but Sunggyu caught it. "What did you say?"

"I'm done cleaning." Sunggyu averted his eyes to the marker, observing it and even opening the cap to look at its fine tip. He could not stand to look at Woohyun in the eyes.

"Cool, you can leave whenever you want," Woohyun nodded. He was losing a lot of feeling in his whole body with Sunggyu standing in front of him, leaning over the counter for balance. For some reason, his heart was fluttering in a very strange way with Sunggyu around. Even after their deal to forget the kiss ever happened, Woohyun's heart could not help but beat faster with him around. You don't like him, Woohyun. That kiss was a joke, he convinced himself.

"What's the name of this song?" Sunggyu asked.

"It's called 'Joah', by Jay Park."

"Oh, the old 2PM member?"

"Yeah, this is a new song," Woohyun explained.

The small talk ended there.

"Alright, I'm going to go now." Sunggyu dropped the marker back on the counter, taking a deep breath as he took his apron off and hurried out of the restaurant. He was done dealing with Woohyun, saving himself the embarrassment of being along him much longer.

Woohyun scratched his head, different thoughts feeding in his head. Can this day get any worse? Woohyun looked around the restaurant, alone and almost ready to lock the place up. He looked down at the counter to pick up the marker, placing the cap back on to throw into a box of assorted supplies. Woohyun squinted his eyes. That was when he noticed a freshly drawn note scribbled on his wrist cast:

"I'm sorry about everything. I hope your wrist gets better soon, bastard. I like you too much to see you like this. - #1"

#1... Sunggyu's baseball jersey number. Woohyun followed Sunggyu through the windows until he was out of his vision, listening to the song finish its course.

I want you and I need you.
Don’t ever ever leave my side.
 

 

Fanfic soundtrack:

 

Jay Park - Joah

 
 
 
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SORRY EVERYONE. THAT CHAPTER WAS AN ACCIDENT

Comments

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DaniaOthk #1
Chapter 24: Aws nice history, i would love read more about Woogyu's relationship🤭
StrawberrySkye
667 streak #2
Chapter 24: and i have to re-read this 😂 I’ve been re-reading this tghe whole day 😅
Wooaegi
#3
Chapter 24: Thank you thank you thank you for writing this. I forgot how much i love this story I'd only read it once 4 years ago *crying face* It's a nice feeling reading it again after forgetting almost everything. You rock! You're one of the most awesome writers I've ever encountered. I hope you still write. Thank you again for everything!
XiahNiwa #4
Chapter 1: before i read, can i ask something? is it top!hyun fic?
chynee #5
Chapter 24: aw this was so great I'm surprised I've never read it before! enemy to lovers fics are my weakness
SimplePerson7
#6
This is really nice! Thank you so much for writing authornim <333
natsumi4ever
#7
Chapter 3: Lol I do hope Boohyun knows of the upcoming destruction
Drhr13 #8
Chapter 6: (๑╹ω╹๑ )
sondoshany143
#9
Just finished!! I really like it so much it felt like I'm reading a script for a drama, sometimes I was laughing so hard and felt it somehow real at parts, I'm too late reading it but I really enjoyed it so much great work ♡