Light poured through the glass, filling the upstairs library room in sunshine. The smells of dust and pages were calming enough to put Baekhyun to sleep, but he kept his eyes open. The sunlight lit up the pages in his novel, blinding him with vivid whiteness. He blinked the shock away and turned to face his back to the light, creating a shadow over the inky words. When was it that he had decided to take up reading? Not so long ago he had dropped the idea of it completely. Books were a waste of time, they served no purpose to him. And yet here he was, his mind completely focused upon a single word of a single page, basking in the afternoon sun. 

Baekhyun's phone rang and he scrambled to answer it. An elderly man on the sofa across the room sent Baekhyun a disapproving glare. He nodded as an apology and held the phone to his ear. 

"What?" he whispered.

"Are you at the library again?" Baekbeom boomed.

"Yes, and shh! I'll get kicked out at this rate!" 

"I'm seriously worried about you, not kidding," his brother said with feigned concern.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Why are you calling me?"

"I don't know, just felt like it. You're always out of the house lately."

Baekhyun rolled his eyes, "Don't call me just because you feel like it, and you know I hate being in that house."

"So what are you reading?"

Baekhyun sighed, "Do you really care?"

"Nope! You got me! I'm actually on a date with Bora right now."

"Good for you, say hi for me."

"Hang on, she wants to say hi." 

The line scratched and whirred as Baekbeom handed the phone to Bora.

"Baekhyun-ah!" Bora's high pitched voice cheered.

"Hi."

"I'm worried about you, you're gonna die if you just sit at the library all day! You're still eating, right?"

"More than I should be," Baekhyun replied teasingly.

Bora's voice grew quiet, "I know you're still hoping she'll show up, but it's been a year already. You can't spend every day of your life at the library."

"That's my choice. Now I'm gonna get back to reading, have fun you two."

Bora sighed, "Alright. Bye!"

Baekhyun set his phone in his lap and leaned back in his chair. So there it was, his reason for wasting his days away reading. If he stayed here long enough, waited enough, maybe she'd come walking through those front doors. She'd have cut her hair, or bought a new dress, something to show the time that passed since the last time he saw her. He'd act like he didn't notice, but his heart would stumble at the sight of her, fall in love all over again in a single moment. Like it has been since the first day he saw her. 

Tiny bells chimed as the library doors opened, and Baekhyun twisted his neck to look. An old woman with a small child holding her hand walked inside. The child bounced with excitement at the painting of her favorite character on the wall. With a sigh Baekhyun leaned forward, rested his elbows on his knees, and let his eyes fall on his book once again. Maybe tomorrow, maybe tomorrow.

It was the third time Miyoung decided to visit Suho and her parents. It grew easier each time, though the longing didn't fade. 

The cliff beside the ocean was particularly beautiful that summer morning. Piercing calls of seagulls echoed about the moss covered rocks, and the taste of salt tingled Miyoung's tongue. A light breeze danced through the trees, and from a long distance away she heard the song of a wind chime. At long last she reached the top of the hill, where three marble tombstones laid perfectly in line. Flowers grew beside the first two, elegant roses swirling up vines beside the engraved letters. The third was one all its own, surrounded by colorful trinkets and toys; a pink flower charm, smiling photos, and a brand new music album. 

Miyoung dropped beside the stones with a smile on her face, and laid a fresh bouquet in front of each of them. 

"Hey Dad," she said as she lay flowers before the first tombstone, "these are called azaleas. They're a bit girly, but the woman at the flower store recommended them, and you know how I can't say no."

"These are for you, Mom," she set a single red rose on the grass in front of the second tombstone, "you were always the easiest to please."

Miyoung finally turned her eyes to the last grave, this one fresher and cleaner than the first two. She blinked away the tears in her eyes and smiled brightly.

"Don't think I forgot about you," she laughed and set a pile of random and vivid flowers tied together with a plain rubber band on top of the stone, "I picked all of these myself. I figured since you never had a favorite color, I'd just bring you all of them."

The wind blew through her hair. 

"I miss you," she continued, watching waves crash against the rocks below, "I miss you constantly. But don't worry, you know how tough I am, right?"

The sound of her laughter was drawn away by the wind.

"Today's his birthday, you know," she whispered and fiddled with the tall blades of grass, "May 6th. I found out from Baekbeom. It's just like him to be born in the springtime. I'm not the least bit surprised."

Miyoung closed and listened to the ocean crashing against the cliffside, she could feel the wrapped present in her bag like a hundred pound weight, like the chains on her heart that she could never quite tear off. 

"Miyoung!" she turned around when she heard the familiar voice and her solemn expression melted into a wide smile.

"Kai."

He broke into a jog and waved, his sun bleached brown hair flapped everywhere in the wind. In his other hand he carried a bouquet of flowers. 

Miyoung braced her hand on her mother's cool white tombstone and stood up, brushing her hair behind her ears.

"You got a haircut!" He panted when he arrived, bending over to catch his breath, but still looking up at her with a smile.

"Do you like it?" She asked, twirling around once to show off her loose white dress and freshly cut hair.

Kai straightened and bit his lip, looking her up and down, then nodded, "Yup. Looks good."

Miyoung pursed her lips, "That's all I get?"

"Well what about these?" he whipped a bouquet out from behind him and held it out to her, 

She laughed, "Much better." 

Miyoung took the flowers and arranged them beside the graves, Kai dropped to the ground and eyed the last tombstone.

"What kind of guy was he?"

Miyoung sat beside him, "Hm?"

Kai tilted his head to look at her, "Kim Joonmyeon, what was he like?"

"He was," she began, and then smiled, "everything I was not. He was smart and gifted and kind and funny and far more than I deserved. I still can't understand why a guy like him would ever want a girl like me."

" 'cause you're pretty?"

Miyoung laughed, "probably."

"Did you love him?"

"I did. I do. Always."

Silence was broken only by the crash of waves and the call of seagulls. 

"I heard it's his birthday today. That present is for him, isn't it?"

Miyoung nodded without looking at it. With a sigh, Kai stood and dusted the dry grass off his pants. 

"Good seeing you all," he said to the tombstones with a smile and turned to walk away, "in case you're wondering, I hear he likes to read a lot these days."

Miyoung turned to protest, there must have been a misunderstanding, she had no intention of seeing him! But Kai was already halfway down the path, thick brown hair flying in the wind and feet kicking up clouds of dust. When he reached the very end of the path he turned around and waved his long tan arm, "Come visit us in the spring, Miyoung! We'll be waiting!"

Miyoung waved back and cupped her hands around , "Of course!"

 Baekhyun strolled past shop windows, listening carefully to the murmur of the crowd around him. Lovers whispered in each other's ears, friends laughed out loud and parents ushered their children along. He had grown this strange habit of not speaking, and rather enjoyed listening to the world around him. A familiar song drifted into his ear from the speaker of a record store and stopped him in his tracks. It turned his head to the window and brought his eyes to the rows and rows of album covers displaying the face of an angel he'd only seen once. Bells chimed as he entered the shop, and he left with a shopping bag in his hand.

It had been quite some time since Baekhyun actually listened to music. Sure, he heard it playing in shops or on the car radio. But when he had last sat down, closed his eyes, and really listened, he could not recall. Music used to be a commonality for him. In his younger years He spent days huddled around the radio or the keyboard in his room, tapping the keys and singing along. It was a small bit of passion and warmth inside his family's grandeur castle of ice. 

The stereo clicked as the CD compartment shut, and inside the disc began to spin. Baekhyun turned the dial to raise the volume and collapsed onto his bed. 

He in a breath and watched his view of the ceiling go blurry as the song continued, water piling up in his eyes and running down the sides of his face. 

"I'm sorry," he whispered to the voice on the radio. 

His cellphone chimed.

Miyoung tightened her fingers around the gift bag in her hands. She paced back and forth at the road crossing, her high heels tapping the concrete with impatience. Thoughts jumped around her head and bounced on her heart, making it beat unsteadily fast. This was a terrible idea! How could she do this? She should just leave now, just leave now and--

The light changed and people began to flood the crosswalk, pulling Miyoung with them. She could feel the pounding music of the nightclub shaking the earth beneath her feet, while memories of a man in a silver suit with a silver car crowded her thoughts. When at last she had reached the other side, her fear had dissipated. Something else pulsed within her veins. Something bittersweet and mixed with euphoria, something like the feeling you get when you jump off a cliff while skydiving, a sense of dying and a sense of living all at once. An end and a beginning intertwined in the relentless wind and open sky. 

The bell on the door chimed as she stepped inside the coffee shop.

He was sitting there with his head propped up in his hand looking out the window, brown, almond eyes all glazed over and distant, and when she opened the door he looked up with a slight startle. His eyes widened and gleamed, he stood up too abruptly and knocked the table back, then bowed his apologies to the other customers. Miyoung thought that it must be possible to have many soulmates and many loves in this life. That god designed this world so that you can love as one can love as many people as possible, and that her love for Suho was just as real and true as the rush of warmth and love she just felt for the clumsy man standing dumbfoundedly at the table in front of her. 

"Miyoung...?" the man finally spoke, and it wasn't the voice she heard in her memories, it wasn't the voice she once thought it was, but it spead up her heart beat just the same. 

She sat down on the other side of the table, and set the present in front of him. Clumsily he took a sip of his drink; orange juice.

"Orange juice at a coffee shop?" she asked, "isn't that a little strange?"

"Maybe," he countered, "but I never was one for normalcy anyway."

"Hmmm," she nodded, "that's an interesting way to put it, Mr...?"

"Baekhyun."

He smiled.

A waitress came by and set the check on the table. Miyoung picked it up and held it between her fingers.

"Well, Mr. Baekhyun," she smiled back, "as promised, this one's on me."

Hi everyone! I know it's been a really long time since I updated, so I'm really sorry about that!

It's crazy that this story has been ongoing for two years. I cannot believe it. It's been a really long and fun ride making this story happen and I'm so thankful to all of you for reading it. The reason I haven't been updating is because these past few months have been very busy and very crazy. 

For those of you who don't know, I was accepted into the Rotary International Exchange program in December and will be spending all next year in Kanagawa, Japan. I leave in 12 days. There's been a lot of paperwork, and a ton of preparation going on so I haven't had a lot of time to give my stories the love they deserve.

My profile will be going on hiatus until I return from Japan, but if you're interested in following my exchange here is a link to my tumblr page.

Thank you all so much for reading Chasing Silence. I love you guys!

~Violet12123