“Aish!!” I am late.” Jonghyun said to himself while running towards the coffee shop where he was working.

He woke up late because it was already five in the morning when at last he got fell asleep even if it was just a two hours sleep. He was on morning shift which was 9 in the morning and he only has ten minutes before his shift starts.

He should have a date last night after his interview but then again, just like from the other days, he lost interest meeting girls. He feels like he was so tired hearing all their chummy confessions on how they love him, how they adore him, how good looking he is. He just felt like there’s a missing piece of him that no matter how many girls he met, it just can’t fill that emptiness. That’s why he just decided to go home and just sleep.

But when he was on the bed, he just can’t bring himself to sleep. He doesn’t know why but every time he closed his eyes, Kibum’s face was always popping somewhere inside his mind. He was hearing his voice inside that apartment. His hilarious laughter, his moans, his cry, every sound that Kibum made was inside the apartment. This is why he barely goes home in his apartment. He never had a proper sleep.

He was only a few steps away when he saw the reason why he was rushing today and the reason of his headache. He was standing in front of the shop together with his boyfriend.

“Nice, what a great start of the day.” He mumbled when he saw Key and Mir talking to each other. He feels like his sudden irritation when he saw them laughing. He shook his head and wanted to ignore them when he saw Mir kiss Key on the forehead. No matter how much he wanted to move his feet it’s not co-operating. Then a sudden pain crossed his chest. The pain that was slowly being familiar to him whenever he was seeing Key.

“H-hey. What did you do that?” Key asked Mir after the other kiss him on the forehead.

“That’s how I show my congratulation.” He said. They are currently talking about Key’s acceptance of the scholarship in Milan, Italy. A place where all fashion designers wish to go.

“Saying congratulation is enough you know.” The black haired guy said while fixing his bangs. “Anyway thank you.” He added with a smile in his face.

“Ahm..” Mir was hesitating to ask his question.

“What is it?” He asked when he noticed that Mir was about to ask something.

“Do you have a plan to tell this to Jonghyun-hyung?”

Key put his head down. Of course, He wanted to tell it to Jonghyun, but then he realized what for. They are no longer a lover who can share the great news with each other. But somewhere in his heart, he still wanted to tell it to him because he was the one who encourage him to apply for that scholarship. He still remember what he said back then.

“Why are you hesitating to apply for something that can help you to achieve your goal? Why don’t you try? You might be accepted.”

When he received his confirmation letter, he really really wanted to call the other to tell the good news. But he didn’t do it because there’s no use telling it him.

“I don’t know Mir. Maybe yes maybe no.” He answered.

Mir didn’t ask anymore about Jonghyun because he doesn’t want to ruin his friend’s mood today. “So when’s your fight?”

“I don’t know yet. They said that they are just going to contact me again to send my ticket.”

“Well. Congrats again. Tell me when is your flight okay?” After saying it he said his goodbye because he was about to start his shift.

Key was about to get in his car when he saw Jonghyun walking towards him.

“Hey. Morning.” He greeted him with a smile in his face.

He took a deep breath. He doesn’t want to ruin his good mood today just because he was talking to Jonghyun. He tried to smile before answering him. “Morning. You’re on morning shift as well?”

Jonghyun nodded but didn’t say anything he was just staring at him while his hands was in his pocket. An awkward silence was surrounding them. He cleared his throat before he opened his car. “Well, I gotta go now. Have a nice day.”

“You two really suit each other. I never know that he can make you blush by just kissing you at the forehead.” The other said before he can enter his car.

“What?”

“I never thought that you can blush by just a simple kiss like that.” Jonghyun doesn’t have any idea what he was talking about and why is he saying those things. But the words were just spilling from his mouth.

He close his eyes then he took a deep breath. “I don’t think it is a good thing for you to mind someone else business hyung. And can you just please stop butting yourself to my relationship to Mir.” He got in his car. “Because if you keep on talking about my relationship with him, I can’t stop to think that you are being jealous.” After saying it, he closed his car then drove away leaving Jonghyun dumbfounded. Now he was really thankful that he got accepted into that scholarship. He will going to use that two years to forget Jonghyun. To forget his painful past.

“Jealous? Am I really acting like that?” Jonghyun mumbled while watching Kibum’s car.

It’s already two in the midnight but Jonghyun was still wide awake and he started to get tired from tossing and turning in his bed. When he was sure of himself that it was impossible for him to sleep, he jumped out of the couch.

He was currently at Minho’s apartment hoping that he can get some sleep compared to his apartment. But he was wrong, his situation right now doesn’t any different when he was at his apartment. He grabbed a piece of paper and a pen then he walked towards the kitchen.

He made himself a coffee before he started to write a song. He was already in the middle of his song when Minho entered the kitchen.

“Hyung. Why are you still awake?” The younger asked while yawning.

“I can’t sleep.” He answered, but didn’t bother to look at the other.

Minho walked towards the fridge to grab the milk. “Are you not comfortable on the couch? Then you can sleep with me at the bed.” He sat across the other.

“No, I am already use sleeping there. I just can’t sleep.” He said then he straighten his back then he gently massage the back of his neck. “How about you. It’s unusual to see  you awake at this time.”

“I was talking to Taemin.” He answered.

“I wonder how can you guys maintain your relationship even if you are both at the different side of the world.” He was really amazed for the two younger who did a great job keeping their relationship alive.

“Trust hyung and love. But I wonder if you can understand those things.” Minho grabbed the paper then he read the lyrics that the elder had been writing. “New song?” He asked then the elder nodded with his eyes closed while leaning his back in the chair.

After reading the lyrics as fast as he can, Minho was so sure that this song is again dedicated to someone and that is Key, for sure. “You saw them again?” He looked at the other who he noticed became older since he and Key broke up.

“Yeah. I saw Mir kissing Kibum.” Jonghyun answered without asking who Minho was talking about. “Minho, can I ask you something?”

“Sure hyung. As long as it’s not a complicated question.”

“What are you going to do when you realize that you’ve made the biggest mistake of your life?” He asked while his eyes still close.

“Bury it on your subconscious then forget about it maybe?”

“That sure is not working with me.”

“Write a love letter asking or his forgiveness.” Minho didn’t hesitate to be blunt since he already knows that it was Key they are talking about.

“He will just going to rip it.”

“I don’t know.” Minho surrender. “Maybe commit suicide but don’t kill yourself completely.”

Jonghyun chuckled at the lame joke of Minho. “Yeah sure. He will gonna let me die.” He put his two palms in his face. He feels like he was about to get crazy. “I’m such a stupid person. Why did I only realize it now? Why had I only realized how much I needed him? How much I love him.”

Minho stared at the elder. “What made you think that what you feel is really love hyung?” He was already sure that the elder was really in love with Key based on how he acted ever since the two broke up, but he still wanted to asked it to the other.

“I don’t know. I’m not even sure if this is love what am feeling right now. All my life all I did was to receive love. I never give it to anyone because I don’t how. I don’t know if I can.” He leaned towards the table as he rested his face in his two hands. “I miss him. I miss him so much that whenever I am at home, all I can hear is his voice. All I can see is the old apartment when he was still there. I want to take him back.” He confessed.

“Then take him back.”

“I can’t. He was already has someone who can make him happy. I can’t drag him with me again because I can’t promise that I am gonna change. I didn’t want him to be miserable just like in the past.”

“But hyung. Everything is different now. In the past, you are not sure about your feeling. You didn’t even know that you love him.” Minho was so sad looking at his hyung like this, but at the same point, he somehow deserved the pain that he was having right now.

“I don’t know Minho. I don’t know what else to do. I feel like my energy have been draining off whenever I think of Kibum. So this is this is the pain that he had when he was with me. When the person you love can’t love you back.” He said in a low tone.

“It’s not can’t love you back, your situation is different from him. Key did once love you and I know he still is. All you have to do is to show him that you love him. You need time to take him back. All you have to do is to be patient and sincere.” Minho advice with a very serious face.

Jonghyun looked at the other. “Do you really think that I can have him back?”

Minho nodded then he stood up to put back the milk in the fridge. “But hyung, do it the sooner you can. You don’t want to wake up one day realizing again that your time for having him back is already gone.” He added patting the elder’s back before stepping out of the kitchen.

“Sooner? But when and how am I going to start.” He mumbled while looking at the song he just finished writing.