❣ 15 ❣

January 10^th, 2028

            Every other time something horrible happened, she would cry. Tears would fall, and she would try to hold them back.

            But this time, she couldn’t cry. She wasn’t. Maybe it was like… when someone felt extreme pain his or her screams would be silent.

            Dressed in a black dress, Mikyung stood in front of a multitude of people, ranging from family to the occasional friends. Having finished speaking, was tight, and her hands were clenched in fists, but no tears escaped from her eyes. Slowly, with shaking legs, she walked back towards her seat next to Mrs. Kim.

            Once she sat down, Mrs. Kim hugged her, silent as the funeral continued.

            Mikyung looked up at the portrait of him, taken perhaps a month or so ago. There was no smile, no light in his eyes, but he was alive, and breathing, and healthy.

            His hair was gelled back unnaturally, and the suit he was in looked stifling. She deemed it as the worst photo she had ever seen of him. But it was one of the last photos ever taken of him.

            Tearing her eyes away from it, she stared into the palms of her hands as they opened and closed slowly. And despite the searing pain and grief she felt rip through her, there were no tears to blur her vision.

            “Mikyung.”

            She looked up and saw her father standing in front of her. And that was when she noticed that the funeral had ended, and everyone began to get up from his or her seats.

            “It’s over.”

            She nodded and stood up as well, saying good-bye to Mr. and Mrs. Kim briefly. Looking up once more at the coffin, she ran up, back onto the stage, until she was right next to his body.

            Her father stayed back and watched as she gripped onto the edge of the open coffin, taking in Joonmyun’s sleeping appearance.

            The bandages had been removed, and makeup lightly covered the remaining scratches or scars. His hands lay over his stomach, folded politely. The suit he wore was of the darkest black, with a white shirt to contrast, and a teal, skinny tie.

            Mikyung reached over the edge and to his tie, loosening it and ing the first button on his shirt.

            “At least you won’t feel choked,” she mumbled as her fingers slipped away from his shirt. Leaning over, her pale lips brushed against his nose. “I loved you.” And she lightly kissed his forehead. “I still love you.” Her lips ghosted over his left cheek. “I always will.” Touching her lips to her fingers, she brought them down and gently pressing them down to the left side of his chest, above his heart. “Goodbye, my guardian angel.”

January 2^nd, 2029

            A year had passed, and it was his first death anniversary.

            Mikyung sat in the coffee shop, an envelope resting in the palm of her hands as she stared out of the dreary windows.

            She didn’t open the envelope he gave her. She didn’t even know whether she still had it until her father went into her room the day after his funeral and gave it to her. But she didn’t even flip it open. She laid it on her desk and never touched it. Until that moment.

            “Mikyung… would you like to go up to his room?” asked Mrs. Kim as she walked towards her.

            In the year he had been gone, she never visited the coffee shop. And she was surprised Mrs. Kim even offered.

            “For… closure, I suppose.” Mrs. Kim offered a small smile.

            Mikyung hesitantly nodded, tucking the envelope into her pocket and picking up her ever-present guitar.           

            As soon as she entered his room, Mrs. Kim slowly closed the door, letting Mikyung know that she would be in the living room.

            Mikyung walked over to his bed and set her guitar down on it. The room was the exact same as it had been the last time she saw it, except, with a keyboard resting in the corner, collecting dust.

            Sitting down onto the soft bed, she pulled the envelope back out of her pocket, resting it in front of her.

            Her eyes wandered around the room slowly, taking in the many sheets of music pinned to his walls, the lyrics, everything.

            Finally, her finger slipped under the opening flap of the envelope and tugged it open. She was met with a series of folded papers and notes tucked into it.

            Pulling them out, unfolded the first one. It was a finished version of one of his songs that he had written for her. At the top, in sloppy cursive, he had written the title “Baby Don’t Cry”. She couldn’t help but sense a sort of irony. He wrote it for her to stop her from crying, as if he wanted him to be the reason she stopped crying. And she didn’t cry, she hadn’t since he died. But she wanted to, just to release all of the pent up rage, pain inside of her. So instead, she wished for him to have named the song “Baby, Cry”. Nonetheless, she carefully caressed the paper and set it down beside her.

            The next paper was of his song “Baby”. She remembered the first time he showed it to her, on that one Valentine’s Day, so long ago, sitting in his living room. He had asked her to sing with him, and she had refused. But she had promised to sing with him eventually. She remembered his voice, soft and gentle as it carried the lyrics and melody while she strummed on her guitar.

            Her fingers, though steady even when lazily playing her instrument, shook as she set down the lyrics and unfolded another sheet. This one was “365”, and he had drawn on small smiling faces across the top of the paper. Mikyung’s lips twitched up in a ghost of a smile. It had been one of her birthday presents, and she already had a copy of it resting in her room. But this one… seemed so much more special, important. And it caused her heart to ache as she read over the words he scrawled under the notes.

            And finally, she unfolded the last piece, “Lucky”. It was the first song he had ever written. And it was already beautiful the first time she saw it. Now, seeing the finished version, she could hear herself let out a gasp, only to realize that for the first time in a year, there were tears streaming down her face, her chest constricting. Quiet sobs left as she looked over every single note, every single word that was written.

            At the end, just as she was about to fold the sheets and tuck them back into the envelope, her eyes caught sight of words written on the back of one of them in a bright, green ink.

            She didn’t care about the ridiculous color, or the awful handwriting on the back. All she cared about was the final paragraphs he had written for her, with the words, “To my love,” catching her attention.

            To my love,

                        Mikyung

            We have gone through a lot together. And now, we have a rift between us that I hope will close soon. But that is not… what this letter is about. Or perhaps it is, but the only connection is that I hope this will close the gap that has grown between us.

            We have been friends, best friends, since elementary school. We have stuck to each other’s sides, and supported each other in every way. And never could I imagine a day without you.

            It was only so long before I realized that I loved you. And I love you now. That is why I’ve written this letter for you. I know that love letters are out-dated and strange now, but who said we were a normal pair?

            This may be sudden… and this letter may be short, but getting straight to the point, I love you, Mikyung. I think I have for quite some years now. But I couldn’t bring myself to tell you till now.

            So if you will forgive me for whatever I’ve done to upset you, if you will come back to my side, I would like to tell you in person.

            I want to tell you in person that you are the love of my life. If you’re confused, I want to clear it up with you in person. And it’s okay if you do not love me back. But all I ask is that you let me tell you in person, and for you to let me love you.

            That’s all I ask of you, Mikyung.

            I love you. Will you let me give you my love?

            Your Suho,

                        Joonmyun

            And that day, she cried. She cried for the first time in a year.

January 3^rd, 2029

            The doctors said it was an aneurysm, like her mother. Others say it was from the cold, freezing to death. But some stray few say that it was from heartbreak and too much grief. They knew the doctors just said it was an aneurysm to hide the fact that they had no idea what happened.

            At the cemetery, right in front of his grave, she was found lying there, with only a coat, a long-sleeve, and jeans to keep her warm. Her shoes were discarded a couple feet away from her and her scarf was also thrown elsewhere in the graveyard.

            She looked as if she was a perfect piece of art made of ice and snow. At least, that’s what the man who found her said. The cold had turned her flesh into a white, snow color. Frost dusted over her dark hair that spread around her elegantly. Even the frostbite in her fingers did not draw away from her beauty in the snow.

            But as she lay there in the snow, the man noticed something strange as he dialed for an ambulance. The weather was frigid, the skies were gloomy, and she obviously must’ve been suffering greatly before passing out. Yet, there was a small smile gracing her lips.

            As soon as Mr. Jung heard, the grief and pain was decreased just a miniscule bit. He knew that she must’ve seen Joonmyun before she passed. And although he lost both his wife and daughter, he knew that they were both in better places. Even more so, he was glad that his daughter was reunited with the man that Mr. Jung knew was her soul mate.

            They made a promise when they were younger. They loved each other, even before they were conscious of their feelings. They were meant for each other. And they didn’t break their promise to each other. They would be together forever, never leaving each other’s sides again.

❣❣❣

On the cake was an angel, much like the cake she had when she was younger. But this time, there were two words, one on each wing. Let’s promise?

“What does that mean?” she asked, looking at the elegantly decorated cake.

Joonmyun sat down opposite to her and brushed her hair away from her eyes. “You’ll never be alone as long as I’m here.”

Mikyung tilted her head in confusion before saying, “Then… you’ll never be alone as long as I’m here.”

“Is that a promise?” he asked, his voice soft.

She nodded and held out her hand, pinky out. Joonmyun smiled at the childish act before linking his finger with hers and pushing their thumbs together. “Definitely.”

 ❣ The End ❣