You step inside and look around the familiar ballet studio.

You couldn’t tell what you were feeling at that moment, but all you wanted to do was cry. You held in the tears as much as you could when you touched the lovely, aged metal hand railing or stepped on the creaking wooden floor. You glanced at the mirror and looked at yourself. Turning 180 degrees you do a plié and a twirl. You laugh coldly at first, but when sudden sadness hits, you fall to the ground with blinding tears. Memories flood in like a wild fire and all you could do was hold your head and cry. Though, you had no reason to cry alone, for there was someone watching you with an aching heart standing right in the door way.

::::

“Haeun?” A voice calls out meekly, but you ignore them and continue to cry to yourself. You hear the sound of footsteps grow closer and right when the hand reaches out to touch your limp body you jerk backwards.

“Leave!” You cry out to the stranger. You looked up with vision blurred out by the tears, “Just leave me alone.” You repeated in a softer tone.

After moments of silence with your sniffles breaking the eeriness, you look up to see if they were there.

They were, looking straight ahead, back to the mirror, playing with their hands.

“Are you done crying now?”

You swallow and wipe your cheek, “Are you following me? How did you even know I was here?”

“Remember when I told you I have dance practice?” He scrunched his nose up, “Well, I have it here.” Jungkook looked to the right you stare at your face, “I came out of the practice room, and all I could hear was a girl crying,” Jungkook exhaled, “I walked into this room, and there you sat, weeping to yourself.”

Then there was a moment of silence where Jungkook didn’t know how to process his words, “Why were you crying?”

“What’s it to you if I am crying, it’s not like you even care anyway.”

Jungkook shrugged, “What if I do?”

“Well I’m not going to tell you now, leave-“

“-does it have something to do with Zelo?”

“What.”

“Bingo.” Jungkook said casually as if he answered a million dollar question.

You turned your head to face him, “Do you think this is a game, Jungkook?” you paused,“ Do you think you can pop in and out of my life like this, thinking you are always right?” You didn’t even know why you were getting so fired up. Your emotion level went up so high that everything you felt, it wasn’t just about Zelo anymore, “You think you know everything,” you pointed at him. “Maybe I am crying because of him, or maybe Yoomi, maybe my family,” You stopped, “or maybe about you.” You gritted through your teeth.

“Come on, you are overreacting, and that’s not even what I meant.”

“Then what did you mean?”

“I just wanted you to vent out your feelings.”

“You, You are not a ing therapist.”

“But I will try to help you, I all I want do is help you right now.” Jungkook was now sitting in front of you, eyes big with worry.

“So now you think I am a pity case, huh?” You laughed coldly in his face, “As if you could fix me. As if you could heal me. I am broken. There is nothing you could fix. I am missing so many parts. Parts of me have already been taken to the grave.” You shrugged, shaking your head while holding in your cries, because you learned from your mother to never let a boy see you so vulnerable.

The two of you sat in silence, until Jungkook got up and grabbed his things. Right when he reached the door and twisted the knob you spoke softly.

::::::

“When I was twelve, I thought I was going to be a ballerina, so I practiced in this room for days on end.”

Jungkook let go of the knob and faced the door, slowly turning around, “I was golden, or that’s what my mom thought. She put so much faith into me, when I would fall she would carry the weight of both us.” You reminisced and looked down, “She was the one when I did not love myself she made sure that she would provide love for the both of us just so I could grow into a lady of well-being.” You exhaled. “So, one month before I turned 13 I was announced as a competitor in a ballet competition. I barely was home, you know, practicing, studying; everything was in the way from me seeing my family.”

You looked up at Jungkook who was intently listening with his hands in his pockets, “So, uh, on the night of my competition, the day before my birthday, I was, you know, on stage looking for my family. I didn’t see them before the show, but I got a text saying that they might be late because of traffic, so I knew that they wouldn’t be there for other performances, but I didn’t want them to miss mine. When my performance was over, being the selfish 12 year old I was, I got so angry. I called both my parents, but they wouldn’t pick their goddamn phones.” A tear slid down your cheek, “And that’s when I was told why they couldn’t be there.”

Your lip started to quiver as you spoke, “They weren’t going to be late because of traffic. They were going to be late because they got hit by an ongoing ing truck.” You bit your lip until you swore you tasted blood on the inside, “I still had the audacity to be mad them, mad at them for not going earlier, mad at them for leaving me. I know that sounds harsh, but how can you not feel that way?” You looked up at Jungkook with questioning, pleading eyes, “As soon as I arrived at the hospital, I didn’t see two body bags I saw four and that’s when I feel to the ground in tears. I saw My Father’s, Mother’s, older brother’s, and my little sister’s. They all lay lifelessly and oh so pale.” You covered your mouth and held in your cries, “My sister, the one you saw a picture of, She was so beautiful but she barely reached the age of 6, ing 6, Jungkook! All because of me.”

“Haeun, remember it’s not your fault, it’s going to be okay-“Jungkook stepped closer to you.

“How is this okay?” You furrow your eyebrows in anger, “Now do you think you can fix me?”

“Haeun, stop-“

“Everything is my fault!”

“Haeun-“ he inched closer with his hands out defensively.

“They died because of me!”

“Haeun!” Jungkook went to your side and you fell right into his arms, weeps escaping your poor, unfortunate soul. Everything that you hid from society spilled. Everything you thought and more pressed into one pitiful summary.

But it was the truth, cold hard truth.

::::::::

            It was silent, all for except the music Jungkook played in the background to drown out your cries. At first when he ran to your side as you collapsed on him, he didn’t know what to do so he just embraced you. Yet, it wasn’t an awkward embrace, it was more over a just forget it, forget it all, kind of thing. He held your head to his chest at first and it soothed you. His breaths slowly connected to yours and his heartbeat; his heartbeat sounded so foreign, and you loved it. You closed you’re your eyes and slowly took breaths the same time as him. You could feel him shifting, as if he was he was reaching for something, but you didn’t mind at all.

You didn’t know why you felt like this, but  from time to time you could feel your heart do flips inside your ribcage and it scared you if you over though about it, but it felt quite good. You could sense that it was getting late and he might want to go somewhere else considering it was a Friday night.  You got off of his chest and looked shyly at his face. He stayed still, his back against the mirror and looked at you questioningly, “What?”

“D-do you need to go somewhere considering its Friday night?”

Jungkook looked at you and shook his, “Nope, got nowhere to go-“ a tune then rang from Jungkook’s phone and both your eyes directed towards it. You then looked from the phone to his beautiful eyes, “Are you sure?”

Jungkook quickly shook his head, “Yeah, it’s nothing, really.”

“Suit yourself, don’t complain to me later on then.” You scooted closer to him and leaned your back against the mirror. You exhaled, “I’m sorry about my outburst, must have burdened you, right?” You played with your hands and pouted.

“What can you do.” Jungkook shrugged, “Can’t hold it in forever right?” he looked over his shoulder and smiled.

It was the first time you have ever felt so close to him.

The first time you have actually seen him smile like that.

And, the first time you thought of him as impeccably charming.  

:::::

That night, you no longer became an old tutor but a wise flower who needed just a bit more sunshine to grow.

That night, Jungkook was the sun hidden behind the dark stormy clouds.

Together, a new relationship sprouted, blossoming into something beautiful.

:::::::

Uhuhu.

Hey guys, I missed you so much, I swear I am not running away from you. I just have been in school, my sister just went to college, I didn’t have my laptop with me for the weekend, and I couldn’t update on kookie’s birthday. Wah.

I missed the bus yesterday too, so it , but, I don’t like my bus anyway because high schoolers can be such jerks. Especially the kinds where they think they are so tough just because they play football. Or the kind when they say, “Oh, its just water, get over it, you are made up of it.” And then start squealing when they get wet. Like, “bish, shut the up.”

Anyways, tell me how you guys have been. Talk to me in the comments below, rants, emotions about anything really, I’ll listen.

Lololol,

Barely-finished

PS.

have you sEEN THE ROOKIE SHOW?!?1? omg. i was laughing so hard.

im so happy ill just spam you guys with jungkook.

(Dis thinks he can have his own photo above his bed, who does he think he is.)

OMG COMEBACK TRAILER.